J. Isekai
@BustinTrudeau
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Following
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Media
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Statuses
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Author of “I Went to a New World and Proved the White Proletariat is a Myth!”
1994 Wingate Drive Powell, OH
Joined May 2019
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Pinned Tweet
The only 3 things you need to be successful in life:
Roof over your head 🛖
Warm bed to sleep in 🛏️
Water to wash your face 🚰
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ℹ️ User is trying to pass off NZD as USD
Hey kids, let’s go see Despicable Me 4 at the…
Wait, what?! $152.69
No 🥤or 🍿. This can’t be sustainable.
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I feel so bad for Cartman. He’s spent his whole post-show life volunteering and raising awareness for causes all around the world but every time he signal boosts something some piccrew avi replies “ERM, is this you??” and posts a video from when he was literally in 4th grade
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Sorry to burst your bubble but the jig is up y’all. Star Wars isn’t some niche exclusive tree club where you hang up a “No Girls Allowed” sign and dictate the terms of the discourse. It never was and that is not changing any time soon.
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Warren’s instincts are unmatched. Letting her campaign leak a major accusation against an opponent just hours before she’ll be on a debate stage with them and asked point blank whether or not this actually happened
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Imagine watching RedZone in this
Visuals inside the new Sphere arena in Vegas which opened with a U2 concert.
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In Rodham, Hillary kickstarts her political career by winning a senate primary against Carole Moseley Braun in 1992
In real life, Carole Moseley Braun wins her 1992 senate campaign and becomes the *first black woman sworn into the United States senate*
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Adult tickets are $13.50 USD each and childrens are $11.40, perfectly inline with non matinee prices across the US
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No guys you don’t get it, i suck shit too! Please make fun of me
Raise your hand if you know why people are trolling Elizabeth's dance moves and not my dad jokes
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Our first Mr. Magoo president
Joe Biden says he broke foot tripping after shower when he pulled dog's tail
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When I say
@SethDillon
has missing 12 year old under his control, I am simply referencing this well known shirt design from NVD fashion
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The Midwest Federation (upstate New York is ethnically Midwest)
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@ZeroSuitCamus
When Cannibal Holocaust was released the director was arrested and charged with murder bc a magazine claimed the movie was actual found footage
Didn’t help that the actors who died in the movie signed a contract saying they wouldn’t do media appearances for a year post release
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McLobster, that’s McDonald’s Canada
*click*
SufganiKing, BK Israel
*click* Nice
Mediterranean Shrimp Lovers, gotta be Pizza Hut UAE
*click*
Tikka Masala Burrito, Taco Bell India
*click* I’ll take it to go
Double Down Hot Dog, KFC Philippines
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@AnimeSerbia
Hasbulla Bowling would’ve been downloaded onto 8 out of 10 computers across America
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Biden is on pace to end up with roughly a 10 seat majority in the House, meaning he lost 2.5x the amount of seats that
@DrJasonJohnson
predicted Bernie would lose (along with the easy senate pick up in Maine, whoops!)
I don't think Sanders loses 60 seats in the House, maybe 10 and that's if he loses to Trump. He would likely cost Dems easy Senate pick-ups in Maine and Arizona even if he wins the presidency
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The oldest millennial is 33 this year. Anyone older who calls themselves a millennial is either a pervert or someone who tries to live vicariously through younger people online (also a pervert)
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This is just what mainstream comedy is now, all these idiots grew up watching annoying orange and this was the outcome
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I asked an AI to create an image of what
#TheSopranos
would look like if they tried to make it today
The results shocked me to my core
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Me: I’m grillpilled, I’m jokerfied, I’m to the left of Bernie but the right of breadtube, I’m reading theory and decolonizing it in real time, I’m a zoomer, and above all I’m a coomer
My girlfriend: why is cough syrup on the grocery list again? We just bought some last week
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Hooters is for winners only
Coach under fire for taking high school soccer team to Hooters after loss
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POV: you just called boygenius’ set at Coachella “mid” and said it didn’t make your top 5
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@ByYourLogic
On the one hand Jon is both the rebellion and the overthrown Targaryn, the old and new religion savior embodied in a single man who rose from the dead. On the other hand, Bran can sometimes control birds or a particularly stupid human for a couple of minutes
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Post the receipt baldy
$110 for this
Holy fuck
We got like chips and dip, some strawberries, and some bacon
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@ElDuderino40
Me now that Elliott Page is finally allowed to watch the big game with us in the Man Cave
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When someone recognizes my podcast host cosplay at the convention
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Last name Oppenheimer, born in Argentina in 1951
Wonder what his parents were up to before that
Two months ago, I wrote that Evo Morales' party could win the Bolivia elections and return it to the Venezuela bloc: . As I feared, it happened, "thanks to the selfishness" of candidates who divided the anti-Morales vote.
@miamiherald
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Republicans finally have their own Chelsea Clinton
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Like if there were any videos of them from that long ago they also wouldn’t be “problematic” by todays standards? The Hitler thing was from 2004, he’s done so much growing since then. He even got a lifetime achievement award from AIPAC for his donations to the Mizel Museum in CO
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Boston fans treat the lightest ribbing of some of the most successful US sports teams of the last 30 years like you told them you helped Dzhokar plant the pressure cookers at the finish line
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If i was a huge dumbass id probably see AOC offering to play ball with party leadership and still facing 13 primary challengers as proof that absolutely no dissent no matter how small will be tolerated and she’s already marked. But then again I’m no Max Berger
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Sherlock Holmes wasn’t real, guys
Inspired by Sherlock’s sister ENOLA HOLMES, we installed statues in cities around the UK celebrating the real-life sisters of famous figures whose prestigious achievements have been overshadowed in the history books by their more widely known brothers.
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@richard_normal
Yeah man don’t worry I hear they’re going to have 5 taco trucks this year after last years disaster of only having 3
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@AnimeSerbia
Alan for walking in and immediately trying to ask for help before even trying to look for paper clips on his own
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I’ve got to be honest i kind of expected the wallet inspector to return my wallet post-inspection
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lol c’mon man. What was Hillary going to tell NYC to shut down day 1?
Because of Trump's failures (failures that stem from obvious character flaws plainly visible to all back in 2015) we've lost *at least* 100,000 Americans who did not have to die. That's a very conservative estimate. It's almost certainly considerably more than that.
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Damn RIP
@rad_milk
you probably remember this photograph. it's one of the more iconic of the awful images of the nazi torch march at UVA on august 11, 2017.
on august 12, the man in the center was elated to see himself on the cover of papers across the county.
today, i can tell you he is dead.
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The dynasty is safe
JUST IN: President Trump's youngest son Barron tests negative for coronavirus
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Every Warren staffer was literally born yesterday, cut them some slack
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@plovejet
As a member of the IDF I trust your ability to identify pedophiles the same way I’d trust Barry Bonds to identify steroid users
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538 said the Dems had an 80% chance to win between 225 to 254 seats with a median of 239 seats
They’re currently on pace to win 222, an outcome with a 1% chance in their modeling, pretty big loss in my books
I don't think "but they lost seats in the House!" is a great take because nobody owns those seats—everybody's term expired—and winning seats as the out-party at a midterm is a whole different (and much easier) ballgame than winning them in a presidential year.
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Not saying Lee Carter ran for office just to be friends with the chapo guys, but i definitely think he ran with the expectation he’d be welcomed on the show with open arms if he won
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This is your 1 warning shot assholes!
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@bulkUSBchargers
You know me and Philip Glass we have a lot in common. People used to yell at him all the time too, they’d say “hey Phil, play a different note!” But he wouldn’t do it. He wouldn’t do it. He said, you know what he’d say? He said “I’m the guy with the Oscar nominations”
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Truly Sean McElwee’s effects on our culture are already being felt
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
Trump votes by mail.
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Now free from the shackles of having to pretend Tulsi is a serious candidate, Tracey can return back to the more comfortable role of “boring contrarian”
This whole "Where's Joe Biden?" narrative is extremely stupid. As far as we know, he's at his house in Wilmington, DE, piling up delegates as the de facto Dem nominee while the economy crashes. Why would he tailor his schedule to placate angry Bernie supporters on Twitter? Lol
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Waiting for Bernie to start the Ohio push to go full sicko mode on the haters and losers on here
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Imagining someone seeing this post and self diagnosing themselves with autism because they like top ramen
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Calling cap on the first 2 sizes being sold out for any Indiana sports team
In just one hour, Fanatics has completely sold out of Caitlin Clark's Fever jersey in sizes XS, M, L, XL, and XXL, per
@darrenrovell
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@DrOz
I owe you an apology
It’s truly disturbing that Members of Congress rushed to blame Israel for the hospital tragedy in Gaza.
Who would take the word of a group that just massacred innocent Israeli civilians over our key ally?
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Trump got too woke and alienated his working class base from 2016 😔
In Times/Siena, Trump's losses among white voters without a degree have a clear regional bent.
He holds his support in the Deep South (and Nevada).
He's not even retaining 90% of his support in the North
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Damn you should go back in time to 1890 and write a novel about this
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I sincerely cannot wait for the Malaysian government to kick down Ians door and whoop his ass for jacking off to Oreimo
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Biden will not have the balls to do
#Lockdown2
despite the growing scientific consensus. Libs who beat the drum about 200k deaths will be justifying why it isn’t his fault that we hit 500k deaths by this time next year. The “Q wave” will make the tea party look like Joe Manchin
BREAKING: Ohio sets new record for COVID-19 cases, with 4,229 new cases in the last day. The state also reported 33 deaths and a near-record number of hospitalizations.
#Election2020
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You just invented gift cards dude
We should think about issuing debit cards that are only good at locally owned small businesses. Only way many will survive. We need to get bigger and more creative.
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We’re going to get about 2 more weeks of people talking about centering POC voices and then it’s right back to writing “Why Joe Biden is America’s 3rd Black President, and Could be Its First Hispanic One”
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Dream debate: Biden vs Trump after 8 PM, no pre-screening of questions
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How are you going to pay for it
First: Bernie has put forward a plan that would make public colleges and universities free for families whose income is below $125,000. It's a good idea, and after consideration, I am proud to add it to my platform.
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A lot of pro-Israel people treated the US siding with the IDF re: who bombed that hospital as a win for their side because it owned a bunch of people they don’t like online.
Meanwhile everyone offline saw a story about a hospital being bombed
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“I hear you saying you won’t vote for me, and my counteroffer is: please?”
Once again tonight..
@JoeBiden
offers an open door to
@BernieSanders
supporters.. telling his young supporters in particular-> "I hear you."
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It’s important to remember when talking about Wexner and Epstein that there is ZERO evidence Wexner was having sex with underage girls
Because as a gay man Les Wexner was having sex with Epstein himself (allegedly, according to multiple people in his notorious shut in life)
BIG NEWS:
The Wexner Foundation announces that it is cutting ties with
@Harvard
over "the dismal failure of Harvard’s leadership to take a clear and unequivocal stand against the barbaric murders of innocent Israeli civilians by terrorists last Saturday."
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It’ll never be more than a footnote in any “autopsy” of her campaign but the fact Warren staff KNEW Pete was 1. Their biggest rival in Iowa/NH and 2. He was blatantly lying about her specifically to key parts of her base on the ground and she never called him on it ended her run
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Can’t believe this guy was front and center for the Warren campaign and still walked away thinking “we can backdoor our way to getting what we want if we just call everything something else”
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How Universities Argue Today:
Me: cool how theres 6 billionaires who donate to the school and none will cover the budget shortfall. Normal world
Wexner: wow its almost like thats my Epstein financing money and isn’t meant to generate good publicity?????? But ok get furloughed
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so...in the end I wrote a little acknowledging thank you note on a check, plus a 70% tip. Waitress came back to say thanks for the note and we chatted about it, and
#MeToo
, and the irony of the situation. It was refreshingly humanizing. I hope it made some small difference.
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Xi Jinping makes MBS look like a choirboy but doesn’t get even 1% of the outrage or negative coverage in the Western press, or in liberal/left circles, that MBS (rightly) gets. And I’m as guilty of giving him a pass as anyone else, though at least I’ve written about the Uighurs.
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Bernie: the first iron Mike, not Tyson but the original, was a kid named Mikey Janowitz. He was a small guy only about 5’6” standing on his toes but boy could he take a punch
Rogan: Wow so you jews really were good at fighting huh
Bernie: well those were the times we were in
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You’d think his last words would be “I paid Christopher Walken to kill Natalie Wood”
Michael Douglas says some of Kirk Douglas's "last words" were backing Bloomberg
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Biden talking about Minnesota today will be great. Him on Don Lemons show saying “look, you can’t kill the guy. Back in my day it used to be you could rough em up a bit, smack em around. But kill them? C’mon man” as a staffer desperately tries to shut the webcam off
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