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The Everything Machine Profile
The Everything Machine

@evrythngmachne

Followers
210
Following
73K
Media
792
Statuses
17K

he/him. Tricenarian. Writer, director, animator, VFX and motion graphics artist, and shambling mechanical simulacrum of a person constructed of water and meat.

Joined September 2021
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
5 months
@pumpermikefan At least shrimp farming produces an actual product that people can use and enjoy. I’d rather have a nice shrimp cocktail than a shitty drawing of a monkey.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@_saintdrew I think something that ticks me off is- she lived in Portugal. She likely knows a fair amount of Portuguese. The best she could come up with for her presumably Brazilian wizard school is “witch castle”.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
6 months
@BraxtonJs @BeeMaister That’s ENTIRELY fucking different than what you said!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Sicko_Mode_Dino @violainebriat Have you ever felt empathy for a character in fiction?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@_saintdrew Like yeah, I’m not shocked that a white British lady put the words “magic place” into the Japanese google translate and picked the first thing that popped up, but c’mon!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@alexqarbuckle Great post, but if this is how I find out the creator of Barney own’s an actual slave plantation….
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@darkwebrats And hey, what if he is a homeless dude who peed in a jar? Shouldn’t the issue here be “what has gone wrong with this dude’s life that he has to pee in a jar? How can we help him? Is it the lack of public restrooms? Does he have some severe illness that needs treatment?”.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Nihoolious @nabidcucklord @WuTangKillaBran @iTrap4TheHokage Have you considered the fact that- these things are tropes because they’re cool as fuck, and people who aren’t looking for reasons to whine about something enjoy them?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@Fawncicle @IzzzyzzzArt Rit ras ran rinevritable ronsequence of Ramerican Rold Rar rinterventionalrism rand Ree.I.A. ruck-ups rat read ro rhe rituation rin rhe rirst race. Hehehehehe.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@Lanipator Shouldn’t… shouldn’t this be behavior we should be encouraging in Cis straight men?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@TheaOwOowo @heynetters Because a lot of them are trying to ape (heh!) on Hewlett’s “stylistically ugly” art style without understand what makes it work and just making stuff that’s boringly ugly.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@mutombros @RT_com Au Contrare- there ARE white people in the Bible: they’re the ones that crucified Jesus.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Sicko_Mode_Dino @violainebriat Same with any other character in a narrative. The only difference being that one is significantly more anthropomorphic than the other.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@Toweroglass @MorganFailchild Only circumstantial evidence. I personally think she’s a lurker and tells herself “it’s research for the next Robert Galbraith or whtever book” so she can sleep at night.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Nihoolious @nabidcucklord @WuTangKillaBran @iTrap4TheHokage Seriously dude, you’re mad a a Star Wars property because it’s “generic tropes”? Have you ever payed attention to ANYTHING Star Wars related?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
5 months
@PhilosophyCuck @cowboyegirl @dungarchitext Actually, scratch that. It turns out they ARE, unfortunately for them, sending their best….
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@GwyndolynPGK @girldrawsghosts You got a lot of balls to be saying that!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@bitterkarella There’s also an exchange in one book where a wizard government official is trying to get an old man to stop wearing a dress and start wearing trousers to fit in with the muggles better, and the whole thing is framed as the old man being silly and gross for wearing a dress.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
5 months
@properlyidiotic @RobertSkvarla It wasn’t innocuous, it was because there was a huge measles outbreak because a bunch of anti-vaxer parents took their sick kids to Disneyland.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Anarcho_Cade_2 @lukeisamazing Boromir isn’t, he’s just a normal man, which is also why he looks his age. Frodo also has the added “benefit” of holding onto The Ring for 17 years, which dramatically slowed his aging down.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@PunishedLorelai @buckadeath @sapphixy ‘Cus he wants to fill you up with the Holy Spirit.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@JuliaFtacek This is also the second time he’s done this, and the first time it was mostly clear that Mark’s not the sort of person who reads past the first line of any vaguely liberal statement from a well known liberal celebrity before clicking like.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@Beaver_Weed @johngreen @elonmusk To be fair, this is basically the theme of like 15-25% of all John’s Vlogbrothers videos.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@ATEXTMESSAGE1 @VENUS__6942 @Culture_Crit Which is weird, considering you’re looking at clay.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@JBloom2022 @LibbyTardis @abughazalehkat Nobody is saying it’s your “responsibility” that they did those things, they’re saying you personally benefit from them doing atrocities and it’s your responsibility to help fix that.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Chinchillazllla One that was closed (and seems to ALWAYS be closed every time I drive past) yet always has the same four or five black SUVs in the parking lot.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@Eve6 @catturd2 I just pulled a lever that said “in case of fire” and now there’s some sort of bell ringing! What’s going on!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@ArchFS @Osinttechnical Our proud Russian soldiers have converted the mighty Moskva into a submarine to better aid in tactical combat!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
5 months
@JewSharkCheese @24rndl2x @DiprimioJack @TheUglyPhoto “We’re good as spotting liars”. Oh is that how you freaks recruit?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
1 year
@samchriskombo @Royal_Patience @kenteclart If you can’t hold it, a plastic bag might help.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Chinchillazllla @awildmaxdisapp1 I’ve lost a cat to laundry related accidents before. It would not be a pretty way to go.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@Fawncicle @IzzzyzzzArt And, like, zoinks! Not to mention that creep Ronnie Regan sabotaging the negations so that he could get that last win against Carter! Almost makes me lose my appetite!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
9 months
@VoicesByZane @Srirachachau For the longest time, all I knew about him was that he was a Doctor and apparently a very private individual. I learned recently that he’s specifically a HOMEOPATHIC Doctor, and considering how many quacks like that tend to also be raging bigots….
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@OnePerfectShot Snyder can actually compose a shot (I would argue it’s the one thing he excels at), but why do all the Snyder stans always choose the most boring purely functional shots as evidence that he belongs in the “KINO” pantheon.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
5 months
@occultiscool @pumpermikefan My god! The ancient times of 2022! Much is lost of this prediluvian era, for none now live to speak of it!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 months
@tr3vor__m8 @CurlyMcNulty Silence blue check.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@scarlett_c4t @_saintdrew And two of those schools aren’t even named despite the fact that probably a full HALF of all wizards in the world would likely be going to one of them.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@PartyOfOnePod I’ll do you one better- Superman’s ability to fly is a retcon to make it easier for the Fleischers to animate him.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Brendelbored @emmagf Gettin’ banned from the zoo is a day spent well/.Now I gotta face god and walk backwards into hell. Yeah I’m posting all day like some kinda slob/.Gotta prove I’m not owned as I shrink into a corn cob!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@mexopolis Tío Abuelo killed a man in prison?! He’s just like my… uh, I mean, that is unfortunate and does not convey a positive role model for the six-to-elevens.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
5 months
@PhilosophyCuck @cowboyegirl @dungarchitext They’re not sending their best.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@Chinchillazllla Look, you just asked if Kevlar stopped arrows, which is “eventually”. You didn’t ask how WELL Kevlar stops arrows.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
4 months
@KunoruSenpai @JakeNoseIt Judging by the state of his apartment, Asmon doesn’t even respect himself.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@JuliaFtacek He’s basically standard boomer himbo dad who watches too much MSNBC.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
9 months
@VoicesByZane @Srirachachau Legally her last name isn’t Rowling, as she changed it to his when they got married half-way through Harry Potter’s run, so I guess she’s.Allowed to go by a different name than the one that’s her legal name, but nobody else is?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Chinchillazllla There’s a fairly well known Italian restaurant in Burbank that I tried for the first time recently. One thing that struck me as odd wasn’t so much anything of the restraint itself, but the fact that there was ANOTHER Italian restaurant across the street….
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@GramsciGordon @Chinchillazllla Movies are the length they are primarily so that theaters can fit in as many showings as they can per day. Now that streaming is becoming the way more people experience movies, that restriction on the upper limit isn’t as necessary.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@BirdRespecter @Airbnb “Hello, yes I’d like to stay a few nights, but I have a question. Do you have a septic system? What? Oh no particular reason”.*tapps several gallon bucket of coffee grounds eagerly*.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@EnbyNo The reason you were so mean is because you’re a soulless coward who wants desperately to be a 4chan style bully.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@KaenKazui @_saintdrew No, no, it’s ok! She did a “Dumbledore is gay” reveal that there actually WAS a Jewish character at Hogwarts. And his name was (get this) Goldstein.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
11 months
@esjesjesj @kimber_grace “Full government” “half government” . I prefer “skim government” myself. Though sometimes I’ll splurge on “almond government” or “oat government.”.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@theserfstv “Pink skin tans” THAT’S CALLED A SUNBURN!!!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@SorbetBarbieSue @Chinchillazllla You do know Rebecca Sugar is non-binary, right?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@Tarasauras @FrankFarnacci @BoulderLeah20 @nypost They were peaceful until the cops started firing rubber bullets at people’s eyes.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@emeralysis @bobposting “And what happened then,.Well in transville they say/.That the pills let Elon’s chest grow three sizes that day.”.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@brandonamajor @LilySimpson1312 If you’re running up that hill, then you’ve made a deal with god; ergo, if you’re rolling down that hill, who does that imply you’ve made a deal with?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
5 months
@gothspiderbitch A few years ago I did an internship with The Academy and as a treat on our last day all the interns had a screening of The Wizard of Oz in the actual Academy screening room. It’s probably the most magical movie experience I’ve ever had.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@SorbetBarbieSue @Chinchillazllla Also, as an animation professional, I have had the pleasure of meeting both Sugar and Lauren Faust on several occasions. They would probably hate your guts.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
5 months
@JewSharkCheese @24rndl2x @DiprimioJack @TheUglyPhoto Judaism is a religion that celebrates life. Zionism is a cult that celebrates death. Your memory will not be a blessing, but an eternal shame.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 months
@jedwill “That one Paul McCartney song where he lowkey [invents a whole genre]” is his entire career. I mean, dude and his school buddies basically re-invented the entire music industry before he turned 30.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@MacStev3nson @wyndigo @ChrisDeLeon But how much does it cost to run?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@Chinchillazllla I was all “how racist could it be” before I saw the screenshot. It’s like “birth of a nation” level racist.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@MaxVince1 @KingNerdKuma On the contrary- recent studies have shown that the ovaries produce possibly even MORE Sick and Gnarly granules by volume!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
1 month
@L0m3z If you’re at a fucking ski resort, chances are you already have your own fucking skis, you dipshit! Why the fuck would you steal something you already have?!.
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@evrythngmachne
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3 years
@WhenSmthCries @bitterkarella It was explicitly an old man in a flowery dress who loudly talked about wearing it because he liked a breeze around his privates.
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@evrythngmachne
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5 months
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@BesDMarx And she just flipped like a light switch! “G****** are a bunch of dirty theaves” this and “you’re lucky you don’t have that kind of filth in your country” that, and after that, I started to slowly hang out with her less and less because I just couldn’t see her the same way.
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@evrythngmachne
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9 months
@amandawtwong You can also tell that Elizabeth’s reaction here is pretty genuine too.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@QuartsClock @ulcmonastery So which Beatle was a beetle?.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@leboism @TheodorAwhoreno He was an actor who wore blackface nominated for an Oscar for playing an actor who wears blackface so that he can nab an Oscar.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 months
@American1Badass @jestom Luigi killed a man with a higher body count than bin Ladin.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@_Floodlight Like, dude breaking into the house of the third in line for the presidency and tries to assassinate her and almost kills her husband feels like a line has been crossed already, but the reaction from the GOP feels like we’re already on the other side of something really bad.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@gwensmo @SebGorka Wait until you see the stolen surplus value your boss takes from yours.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@Chinchillazllla @murderxbryan @BonusEruptus So much for the tolerant left!
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@wageslave69420 @uncledoomer I’m a sucker for a clever add campaign.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@pristinechroni2 @MationMiss @choochiano1968 No YOU are what’s wrong with country!.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
3 years
@TheSteelStag @zachsilberberg I wonder if they ever get into the weird squabbles this would cause- “hey, Crimebasher! You can’t bash crime here in The Battery! This is Mighty Dude’s territory! Go back to Flushing where you belong!”.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@DrewGreenDraws I’ve worked on shows I liked, I’ve worked on shows I hated. Nothing quite erases that thrill of seeing your name in the credits though.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@bugsmaytrix Typical haters! Harry didn’t even talk like that! If you want to have a real debate about the books, use a real quote like-.Harry looked around worriedly. “Er…” he sheepishly asked Hermione who was girlishly sitting biologically “I think we need to do some hatecrimes.”.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
2 years
@_fetusfilets_ @DreadMillennial Gotta make sure those early stages are the only stages.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@hausofdecline I always heard a rumor that there was a planned ending just for the DVD extras where it ends on a news report of him being arrested and tried for five counts of murder.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@Neoncaffeine @IzzzyzzzArt @JamesPeppersalt Worse. Scrappy’s a narc.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@SorbetBarbieSue @Chinchillazllla Oh shit, and your header being from the She-Ra cartoon produced by Nate Stevenson who is Trans as fuck is just the extra cherry on top!.
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@evrythngmachne
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9 months
@SkeleMann “Push a politic agenda”.God, they even sound like todlers.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@BesDMarx A good friend of mine back in high school was from Romania. We initially bonded because we had an assignment in class about whether we thought the then upcoming Iraq war was justified, and we were the only people who were not only against it, but very emphatic about why we were….
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@addiemac2020 @arvofart Yeah! That guy sucks!.And Mark David Chapman is a real piece of work too!.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@BosBabyOfficial @CRlMSONAClD @LizarddFish Literally two of Goku’s best buds murdered basically all his other friends at one point before he became friends with them.
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@evrythngmachne
The Everything Machine
9 months
@VoicesByZane @Srirachachau I’m almost certain he was Patient Zero of the transphobia in the Murray-Rowling household.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@ElliottSigh @bluecornboy The Irish weren’t forced onto brutal tenant farms back then so they could grow whatever they wanted.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@Keptopolarbear @realPhoenixFire Nazis shouldn’t be allowed to have opinions in general, of course.
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@evrythngmachne
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3 years
@roramdin And even that isn’t entirely accurate to the original Manga line of “The era of Morbing has begun!”.
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@evrythngmachne
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3 years
@KiminLa @iamcardib One on the left could suck a golf all through a garden hose apparently.
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@BesDMarx And she also introduced me to things like Food not Bombs and volunteered with Greenpeace. Then after knowing her a few years a conversation we were having somehow got on the subject of Romani people….
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@evrythngmachne
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7 months
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3 years
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@evrythngmachne
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2 years
@APunishedBill I guess that's the crux of it. They believed liberation was possible. I think a lot of the squabbling comes from a place of "This is the best possible world so we have to fight for the table scraps wherever we can.".
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@evrythngmachne
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3 years
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