Matt Hausmann Profile
Matt Hausmann

@MattPHausmann

Followers
192
Following
99
Media
271
Statuses
3,910

Full-stack web developer. Homeless. Developer of Sakurai Was Wrong: ; other things in the oven

Joined September 2023
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@ZyMazza This tracks with my understanding of pop culture archers (Katniss Aberdeen, Yukari Takeba, etc). For some reason non-crossbow bows are slightly more female-coded than male-coded.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@Calibaneur idk he's doing 4 class wanks a day i think he'll be fine
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@mauddweeb I keep reading your name as foreskin something. I don't have anything to contribute I just thought you might be interested to know. Anyway take care.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@thomas_violence @SpacemnSpif Every tournament I've ever been to (fighting games, tcgs, debate, all of them) has required you to be there on time and if you're late you don't get to play. Just be a hardass out of respect for people's time
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@Jade_Geist @H_B_Eagb @Eviltrkeyslice @PinkieToons @TeedyTwoShoes People use cornstarch to thicken sauces and soups all the time, it has almost no flavor
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@encitsarr @MEoDP_Enjoyer 2 tickets is worse than 1 ticket 2 life sentences is the same as 1 life sentence
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
8 months
@vats9_9 date went well except for that one moment where she showed me her sketchbook and it was this and i sat there in genuine shock for a good minute
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@filmfemcel @thedigitaldash_ your such a nerd you know what he meant
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@ryxcommar ni hao was invented by ni hao kai lan
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@BasedNorthmathr "Software exploits" brother if you can do something that means it's permissible by normal software execution. That's just software. You didn't use a cheat code
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
8 months
@mormo_music the mile record stalled at 4:01 for like a whole decade until someone finally got beneath 4 minutes and then the record started getting broken again
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@NarniaJGC Wow if I ever go to Miami I'm not going to any events at @ROKesports that's for sure Who knows what ridiculous rulings the TOs are going to subject us to
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@ZerothAxiom According to the musical Rent, a year has 525,600 minutes. If it takes you 30 seconds to put on and take off your shoes (which is really really optimistic btw, you will get tired) you're looking at a solid year of manual labor. Sorry to the 13 who die.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@hausofdecline why'd you say "we" when God did that? are you God?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
@bstract_thot what about mom&strangers? or fiancee&strangers? also does "some strangers" mean "a group of strangers," or does "some strangers" mean "some strangers, but not others"?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
@AnneChovy2 it's trying to communicate
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@GoodReddit constructo WHAT irl?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@fuziontony123 @lovesickdoe no, heterochromia means hating gay people
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@personofswag yes, i am sure that "the usa is the greatest country in the world" is a suspension-worthy offense. they were having a normal conversation, he said "i think the usa is the greatest country in the world," and then the teacher suspended him and the principal agreed.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@Maxine1412 @GuyJBaldwin no he meant medically-assisted suicide
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
8 months
@larissaphillip Lots of Chinese and Japanese people can't handwrite many hanzi anymore and they're just fine. As long as they can organize their thoughts, express them clearly, and pick the right word from a list, spelling ability doesn't actually matter.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@mechanical_monk What other rule would you expect them to not learn?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@Ringler_SSBM why you lying he conceded because the TOs didn't allow him to *remove* his opponent's ability to hear the game by plugging headphones into a monitor that had sound the very tweet you're quoting said "I DECIDED TO DQ"
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@PossesedFrisk @BENZOTOOIE I would expect every culture to develop wheelchairs but this particular wheelchair looks like it was made in the US in the 20th or 21st century
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@Larkos_TBBH @notcapnamerica god i would love to see this company get put out of business
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@clendob45 @shwinyo work has a technical definition in both physics and judaism
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@SLASHY_ssb we lost a venue because a guy pooped in the trash can
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
8 months
@4chan_green @InternetH0F wow I'm having a hard time coming up with a worse one than Larold Lichard? Latthew? Lelix? Lartholomew?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
8 months
@groovygladiator @nbafakeeuro @ClownWorld_ Yeah what even was your point? Your original tweet reflects badly on you. You sound like you're so ready to dunk on someone who think they're smart that you make yourself sound dumb. You should delete it.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@JoannaMang you should be even less normal go out to your garage and let the neighbor hear you slap a beanbag chair over and over again while yelling about the "ball play situation" while the kids scream "ow no daddy please stop"
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
8 months
@VETTE____ @AltHistCody No, the panic response from asphyxiation comes from CO2 levels in your body rising. Air is basically all nitrogen, so it's a more humane way to asphyxiate people since your body can't tell the difference (your brain doesn't actually measure O2 levels).
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@ShardLillith @hologramvin English is pretty much phonetically consistent for reading. You can almost always guess at the pronunciation of a word from its spelling. Literally every word in this tweet except possibly "word" and has a perfectly predictable pronunciation.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@mundane_italian @banalplay because there are a bunch of wrong answers, many of which might have more upvotes than the correct answer
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@DhaarmikAi @PicturesFoIder That's impersonating a police officer right?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@trapnesty @NarniaJGC @ROKesports i brought my oculus and im going to plug my switch into it and if the game video is so important to you then bring your own oculus
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@EliMcCann @Groovy36754 is your husband single
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
@bilbosfootcomb "this strange creature" and it's a guy with a slightly odd haircut whose glasses don't fit very well
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
@made_in_cosmos please excuse mEoiQmnT from class today he has a stomach bug and is recuperating at home thank you
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@tsve_ tell hunter i think that coat looks nice on her
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@AltHistCody i mean to be fair, her name is science *girl* not science *woman,* maybe she's 2 years old
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@iAmBillieTheKid @707tothe775 @FearedBuck if i concede that the guys should have given up her stuff, will you concede that she was 10,000x worse?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
3 months
@colorgravemhin @DMechano they didn't say it's ineffective, they said it's awful if you want your kid to stop doing something, feeding them into a woodchipper is an awful way to do that, but it's effective
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@madisontayt_ @homo_placidus that's a whole new sentence
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@KThor21 @t3dotgg no, you don't deserve to have it explained to you why wanting exclusively monoracial entertainment is dumb, you can just simmer in that mystery forever
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@CartoonsHateHer @Dr_MickWilliams so we agree that spiros definitely wanted to boink your husband right
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@ravenscimaven you *instantly* know the beetle requires extra justification, so
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@SolsSpace this guy's invited to the church picnic
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@ROKesports @NarniaJGC this particular thing won't be but if your "head of smash" thinks you should be able to deafen your opponent because you brought your own equipment from outside the game then who knows what other ridiculous ideas he'll go along with
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@skooookum nah i'm great at imagining people having sex with each other
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@ElytraMithra *picks all the drones and gets a secret second captcha*
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
8 months
@Sunni_Labeouf @christapeterso innocent gazans are worth saving, mike
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@insaneworldeven @interesting_aIl You know how babies investigate things by putting them in their mouths, even when they're not hungry? Sharks do the same thing.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@NotPremi chicken "paws" lol pretty sure this is more a culture thing than a gender thing
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@iAmBillieTheKid @707tothe775 @FearedBuck That's a start. Can you agree that she was *worse*?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@anonynaut Running is a *terrible* demonstration of the gap between the sexes because basically everyone can train and be significantly faster than average. I used to run 5k's as a kid and basically every race would have an 8-year-old running 25 minutes
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
@Paul_Melman @PstafarianPrice @stablestrategys more like watery dirt than dirty water then
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@skooookum "imagine that vscode is a fleeing antelope" i tell myself as i refresh twitter for the 4th time this minute
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
3 months
@yifever @oyabujim Why do you think that? It fulfills the same general role as a textbook. It has the same benefits and limitations. If someone sees "frau = woman" on duolingo do you think it will just pass right through their eyes? You're taking the "you don't learn from duolingo" think too far
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@marixdumptruck @SaintSmith_ @rahsh33m that's why he said shred your own shit, because there's no anti-caking agent
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@JackWilliamRtF The YouTube algorithm can do it too! Yes YouTube I *do* want to watch this 350-view video about some weird speedrun tech for a game I don't play. No, I *don't* actually like the rest of their stuff. Thanks for the recommendation!
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@shakoistsLog Algebra is a terrible example of this because it is actually useful to most people's daily lives, unlike derivatives or the innards of a frog. Algebra 1 is probably the highest math we should require of everyone.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@Mackenzie_Noake @GracchiSimp what do you think will happen when you say "siri order doordash" like which restaurant? what menu item? is all the address info already in the app? etc
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
@AltHistCody This seems like a point against the argument that this was a "riot" or that they were rendering the space impassable They're doing their thing over there, he's doing his thing over here, everyone's happy except for the people who don't like the message of the protest
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@jpbrammer yes, when someone says "my roman empire," they are *literally* only saying thought, good job! no connotations of obsession or confusion at all.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@ravenscimaven Why did you say BEETLES ARE WINGED INSECTS TOO and not MOTHS ARE WINGED INSECTS TOO one of these is clearly "the other one"
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@NarniaJGC @trapnesty @ROKesports quick, so i can know if you're actually engaging in good faith and understanding the issue at hand here: why is "bring an hdmi splitter" not the same thing as "bring a headphone splitter"
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@CartoonsHateHer if you make people go to a physical office to do computer work you deserve whatever you get
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@meeradeo Why do they insta-deny lawyers? Also why did they wait to hear what you taught first, would you not have been disqualified for different answers?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@danghentschel my attention span is only 5 seconds because i have adhd
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@bryancsk So how do the 1% keep the food in?
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@xitsnicholasx @Rothmus "oh yeah well have you considered the price of a quarter cup of olive oil and a few thyme leaves" lmao
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
10 months
@SFGC_official I don't think you realize how poor most of the world is
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@mundane_italian @banalplay i give up you're right you win i lose "this is the right answer" is always a stupid dumb thing to post i'm gonna hang myself for being such an idiot
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@Meaningness your father, a high shool English teaher, lied to you
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@LetsTread @fatfabfeminist @the_moon_monkey I'm homeless, I have seen how the people in the breadlines treat their dogs, this is not true.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
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@niccoyat
Niccoya | Winter Arc
5 months
So I went to sonic today and had a very rude manager tell me that NO SONICS sell floats & then proceeded to tell me I couldn’t buy an ice cream and a drink separately?? UHM HELLO.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@deloisivete i can't *pbththh* understand *pthbhthp* your accent *phpththt*
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@Pope831 @AlienB0i >dream eater are you the kid
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@worsematt Both of these groups are *insanely* rapey and you should keep your kids far away from them
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@fractalcounty normally they're not supposed to take THAT much blood
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@MattZeitlin you park in front of the house you're visiting duh
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
3 months
@colorgravemhin @DMechano Which part wasn't intentional? You wrote the tweet, it's not like a melon fell on your keyboard. And what do you mean "out of context?" You tweeted that to market your game.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@mundane_italian @banalplay sorry can't reply, am corpse hanging from a noose
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
8 months
@ivy_sly_ make the mc ugly but release the necessary assets to mod her into a hot babe alternately just make a bad game
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
@anpaure @skooookum "conventionally attractive puma" lmao
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
5 months
@vansianism IP law is good but squatting on an IP is bad. Sans Undertale deserves protection since megacorps can work faster and at much larger scales than Toby Fox. Mickey Mouse also deserves protection since Disney is constantly using him. Phil of the Future though? ehhhhh
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
7 months
@growing_daniel i mean if you have so much wealth that you can possess an entire fukken unoccupied house i have literally no sympathy for anything that happens to your house when the alternative is that someone goes homeless
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@onefiftyfivemm @JoeySiskjoey You can be good at some things and bad at other things, Drew.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
3 months
@TKbreezy I hope he gets one! He's polite and honest and probably doesn't have too many opportunities. He's a poor guy in a poor country and a laptop would change his life. It's like one of those "things I got just for asking" videos.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
4 months
@mpopv Given that butterflies remember being caterpillars it's not really fair to say that they "died"
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@Lifter_Fren it's weird that your need for skin-skin contact is gendered. cultures everywhere have a norm of "skinship" with straight dudes holding hands and sitting on each other's laps and stuff. you're just horny.
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
3 months
@d_feldman @Miles_Brundage it's to disambiguate between single and double vowels re-e-lec-ted vs ree-lec-ted
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@HRTFRG "i wanna try baking with mushrooms :)" HELP IS AVAILABLE YOU ARE LOVED DON'T GIVE UP ON LIFE
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@thdxr Posting in your second language means you have to be aware of the norms of the cultures that speak that language. The *entire* anglosphere associates swastikas with Nazis. the account knows this of course and is playing it up for engagement
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
6 months
@the_gurl_kai @MichaelaRay89 @SheRatesDogs im peeing and bleeding out the same hole right now
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@MattPHausmann
Matt Hausmann
9 months
@christineist lol the guy knew from the beginning where this was going, his tone didn't change at all
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