vocal production 👻 | $tripper | Pole Artist | Organizer |
@onmuvasdc
| A&T | I’m from SE | GENDER SCHOLAR - George Washington Univ. | trixietheepixie
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This convo always bores me because it’s gone from validation and empowerment to completely ignoring the fact that if we restructured things in the way we approach caretaking —- this level of happiness and ease could also be available to mothers.
@_ethatsme
@ar_wise
@dkcmusic
Especially if my friend’s parent died so she had to move it. Like bitch the summer got 3 months. You can’t pick one of the other 2?
@itsKARY_
I wonder why she just won't say she doesn't wanna do music anymore.. like explicitly because we didn't really like them songs. So girl, just quit?
Being a parent does not HAVE to drain the ever living life out of you. And I just think the discourse is turning to a place where we don’t imagine happiness in parenthood and I’ve actually always been concerned about it
@Ama_ndlela
@UsernameSsSuck
@AdamantxYves
(I love when yt people do their hair.)
In my head I be like y’all got straight hair and that’s just how you wear it. STRAIGHT. So boring! Do sumn dang!
There are so many ways to be happy and we’re really short sighted and extreme about it. I saw a difference in my happiness compared to that of my own mother just by way of making different reproductive choices about when where why and how many kids to have.
I was always wondering why the worst thing in the world was me having a baby, but the reality was that the issue is not in fact that I am a mother but that there aren’t many supports that would allow for caretaking not to derail my life.
Tina Turner is such an inappropriate comparison for so many reasons but the main ones being:
1. Tina has contributed so much to BLACK music BEFORE she started expansion
2. Tina’s reasons for separation are much deeper than hurt feelings after showing feet in the chat
@KiaSpeaks
its fine because as a "hood" person, you know when EYE am uncomfortable? around a whole bunch of Brunch Blacks. and I have the degrees and credentials and LLCs and nonsense. I prefer the strip club locker room to my HBCU homecoming so do with that what you will.
It’s real wild how Will the one being called a bitch but Chris Rock up here crying about being the one who got popped.
He a bitch but he swung on you, it connected, and you making a check off it. But he a bitch doe
I say this with love. Truly.
I think it’s real funny how everything that’s relational and communal can no longer be seen as an accomplishment but everything connected to furthering capitalism can be.
So I can’t feel accomplished as a mother but I can if I buy property?
Growing up that was always everybody’s fear. That I would “get pregnant.” And I just don’t want to feed that fear because I think a lot more women desire a motherhood that isn’t a death sentence
I didn’t have to pick “NO KIDS SO HAPPY LOOK AT ME SO HAPPY.” And contrary to what the internet will tell you, most women are not going to choose to be childless.
If only rich people had kids, the rest of us would live to service those families. Which is … kinda what’s happening.
The birth rate has gone down. Bc most people think they shouldn’t have kids without a certain amount of money
I’m not saying that people should have kids who don’t want them. I’m just saying that we’re framing this convo as if the only way to be happy is not to have them similarly to how we talk about “divesting” from men and … we have seen where that has landed us
@ForeverThatG1RL
@lavidalocaaaaa_
So she’s right about the craving. When I’m stripping 3-4x a week heavy stuff makes me feel sick. So I can only eat light or heavy protein/salads. So if you’re active, your diet will likely follow.
I believe in it too, kids staying out of adult business BUT I also think that black folks in particular put too much responsibility on kids for them to stay out of our way when sometimes we need to do the grown up thing and move certain shit out of their way.
This may be a hot take but I actually don’t think trying to de-emphasize dating is the important thing as much as being honest that right now school is a part of life.
Minimizing her romantic interests may cause rebellion. (ask me how I know 🙃)
So one of my (yt) co-teachers checked me on this. I was talking to them about something the kids shouldn't know about & I shushed the kid, noting "adult convo" & my co-teacher went, "why are you having an adult convo in front of a kid?" & my black ass was like. damn. +
This is why I said a few weeks ago that vanilla girls are missing two VERY BIG pieces of SW culture that they’re appropriating:
1) in SW, both the client and provider consent
2) SW is work
Y’all cannot finesse these niggas out of a bag. You don’t know what you’re doing.
This is a part of rape culture tho. You should never assume anyone is gonna sleep with you. And any man who spends thousands without even one sensual conversation or saying explicitly what he wants is a MARK. Bottom line: Consent can be revoked at any time.
@alwaysqari
@JoeBriggsEsq
@JustAFamilyMan_
The gag is that then black family model has always been communal and full of love from extended family. It is draining that people ignore that. You don’t *need* a two parent household
The responses to this are kind of ignorant. Hymns come from enslavement and they weren’t allowed to sing explicitly about freedom so they metaphorically likened it to “heaven/“death.”
Also, it’s homage to the enslaved who took their own lives in order not to be slaves anymore.
@thecindynoir
One of my college professors was his cousin and she said how he came to family functions so intentionally not trying to be sexual and really struggled with how people viewed him. It was really sad.
To add to this, I also think we have to be honest about the limitations of a cishetero marriage. Everyone is not “divesting.” As we age, people will fall in line with the old order because not enough is being done to change things systemically.
@deepmythos
@itsKARY_
Idk something about it just seems off. There are plenty of artists that take long breaks between albums. But something about this seems like a scam lowkey lol. Like fr
Y’all really want singleness to make you an oppressed group. I’m single and ask my friends how dating is going all the time because we’re fucking friends. If my friends in relationships asked me I would tell them because they’re my *friends.* I talk to them about my life?
If I purchase stolen land and try to make it my own, I can say I’m accomplished.
But I push a person out my own vagina, gather and maintain resources to support that person to and through and even beyond either of our lives? Nope. Doesn’t count.
Kiss my black ass.
@Apache_Me
@crissles
Correct me if I'm wrong, but there's also probably something in there about listeners of The Read being disqualified from having her as a therapist. Lol.
I also want us to grow comfortable with the fact that sometimes there is no red flag and you just learn somebody ain't shit when you learn.
Impressing upon ourselves that we should have always "known" or been able to see if a form of self-blame. We don't need it.
Listen at the end of the day they were a sexy ass couple, mama stayed smiling, and we all wanted the tape. I am so happy Meg is moving forward and doing what’s best for her. We are all guilty of sometimes going colored blind when the red flag waves.
I wanna be clear that my platform is about supporting mothers, particularly ones who do sex work. So I actually am not particularly interested in other entry points for abolition. That’s my work and what I speak on. If you doing other work that’s great. That’s just not what I do.
We do this to girls ALOT.
“You need to be in them books”
“Stop worrying about them boys”
And we’re teaching them to neglect their social and emotional (yes) needs for academics and that’s not an honest account of how real life will go
Y’all really need to do something with your deferred dreams. Really. But some people are living lives that they’re happy with — that is an accomplishment. Have you seen outside? And the constant attempts to rob everyone of joy? Or no?
@glazedovrblazed
@astroeleanor
Any deep review of your philosophies around sex, family, and inheritance is what needs to happen. Say less during this transit. Think more
my existence as a childless person is not *so* I can support families. I’ll do that, yes, but that’s…that’s not the trade off I’m doing. “Have kids yourself or use your resources & time to support families that have kids”
Yea baby I literally quit teaching to strip. I was a FT lead teacher during the height of the pandemic and I was so bogged down in my home office that my then 3 yo walked out the front door and I didn’t notice.
The job literally is putting our mental health in grave danger
This might sound wild but the mother wrong for showing the text to the Dad. We can have a conversation about why ur father is frustrating u in confidence. I'm gon tell u NTM on my man, but nobody likes to feel like they confided in 1 parent about the other & got double teamed. +
I was giving my daughter a punishment (2 weeks no electronics) for eating in her room after we told her not to… so she hug up on me and texts her mom..
This is also funny because we keep having this cyclical conversations about childless folks needing and yearning for community and engagement but they’re always screaming to the rooftops about how they don’t have to. You right. You don’t. Lol
She lives in a Tik Tok world. Yes, she wants lashes and a buss down.
Asking her to completely ignore that part of her life is not helping her to be whole. It’s teaching self-neglect for institutions
If I exploit people through a business as the owner, I can say I’m accomplished.
If I further my education according to white sup. ideologies of pedagogy, I’m accomplished.
as a person who actually works mutual aid and has studied welfare policy, etc. I think what's most frustrating for people coming at this from an academic standpoint is the fact that poverty is literally engineered for Black mothers and the machine is working. +
I've watched this "poor people/having children" convo unfold for two days now and there has got to be space for both the advocates who rightfully call out the eugenics of it all and the formerly poor kids who say if they had a choice they would not have chosen that life
And I hate to be that girl but clients be needing empathy when they approach us, and if it’s in our toolkit, we give it.
I had a guy come in the club the day his mom died. He was so sad. 😔but I had just lost my grandma so we could talk about it
Everybody I mother is clothed, has their own room/bed, eats freely (😂), is enrolled in school & attends, asks for hugs/feels safe, can have friends over and is encouraged to care for their mental health.
I’m about to roll up in front of this tv feeling what? ACCOMPLISHED
When people are referring to feeling accomplished as a parent they’re not referring to the act of conception, they’re referring to having taken care of and been able to guide another human through growth and development.
Teachers even!!! Can be accomplished. But not moms?
I’m actually very loyal I just don’t like the idea that if I see a new person I wanna fuck I can’t fuck them because of an old person. My polyamory is really based on the idea of me being able to explore when the mood strikes and most of my life is set up that way
So I was listening to a SW spaces a few months ago (I am a SWer) and apparently this is really complex amongst us. As a SW advocate, it’s really hard to show people the difference between choice in SW and trafficking.
The glorification of pimps in the Black community is one of the main reasons so many Black girls and women are victims of sex trafficking at the hands of BM and everybody turns a blind eye. Pimping is human trafficking and needs to be treated that way.
@SupernovaMomma
This feels like having no money and having to strip in the hole, owing the club, having to make the club's money first and THEN taking home whatever you make. Welcome to our world. We work in the hole all the time.
Without my title of mother I’m still a sister, a niece, a cousin, an auntie, etc. i still have responsibilities and the funny part is that women who are mothers and hold those other titles often do so simultaneously. Like we said the other day, it be moms helping moms.
@FromAerin
the Taurus moon would explain the short neck, Virgo rising explains the Cherub, round face. Gemini venus would make the eyes kind of dark and hidden a bit. Btw virgo and Gemini, the face (Virgo) as the mercurial chart ruler would take over the smaller eyes/nose