Kylo Ren
@thecocainevinyl
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One solid playlist and I’m like “that’s all?”.
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tha funniest nigga yk don’t even b joking.
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Admiration or "wetin we go chop this morning eje?".
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National blackout no affect me, my babe the light of my life.
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Me on that 8th piece of meat asking Grandma "Eyin o je ni?".
I remember, they gave me a separate plate with like 10 meats and pomo. 🤣😂😂. Baba nla test, Na 1 I chop. Grandma Dey look me. 😂😂. Babe said eat more, I said “mo ti wa okay” .😂😂. Na wife I come pick abeg abeg.
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Twitter really pulling the "you smart, you loyal, you grateful, and we appreciate that. Go buy yourself a house, spend money for no good reason, come back and ask for more.".
Here's what I'll do: .I'll make a little cabinet so everything on the floor will be neatly arranged and locked. A bed frame and bedside table next. It's the ones who are squatting with friends that say the most. Radarada oshi.
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Hopefully, you have a new year resolution.
My brother is always yabbing me because I watch movies in 240 or 360p.What is wrong with that?.
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I just want to eat.
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Cursed energy go dey overflow for this Nigeria, e sure me die.
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She said.
… I told her my name is Obito. She said "No, the one on your birth certificate".
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Tbh, Im itching to fly over this place with a giant pot of stew. .
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Porters looking at him when it’s time for clearance.
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Her man:
The one I followed asked me how many goals I wanted, I said 3. He scored 3.
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You think you have your dream house all figured out then Ben shows up with another crazy combo.
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do y’all have “forbidden” pairs you think look alike but also know NO one else is gonna agree?.
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Lord knows if I had that kind of first name, I’m finding a way to change my last name to Kenobi.
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The year I was promised a PS2 if I did well in school, studied like there was something else to it. I dey hot. Omo, I was untouchable.Came first by a wide margin. Didn't get the game in the end. That was my villain origin story.
Beating kids coz they are failing academically. How does pain or fear aid understanding or knowledge acquisition?. What if the teacher is book smart but a poor communicator to tiny humans?.
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Your username a pretty big hint though
God. person don mess inside this bus.
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There were probably 6 deadly sins until God saw this guy and said “Nah, gluttony has to be in there”.
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Me as a househusband showing my millionaire wife the new LEGO set I want.
Making money as a woman, does not make you valuable in the eyes of men. But upholding your feminity, makes you valuable in the eyes of men. Your money will only attract male leeches to your life, but your feminity will attract a masculine man to your life. It's all about choice.
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Going through the quotes, from the person making $150k monthly, to the $30m story and beyond, I've realized that there's no end. Humans always want more. Always.
What was your biggest “I need to make money” moment ?.
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@EmanTrebor @pwwrrzz @BigManChulo @Bigno617 @adam_3154 @UncleRono_ @IsaiahThinks In my opinion they played two very different jokers and did so outstandingly.
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"If you had picked C it would not have been not incorrect".
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Not just a homeowner, a home from ben wegmann homeowner.
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Me with my 30 seconds.
BREAKING: The Rubik’s cube world record has been broken at 3.13 seconds 🎉🤯
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You people must think we dont have anything to do with our time and that is absolutely correct.
The 4 hour and 11 minute extended version of ‘LORD OF THE RINGS: THE RETURN OF THE KING’ will release in theaters in April.
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“Call me, so I can make egusi for ya”.
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So many wild assumptions in qrts but one this is certain, and it's that they know the value of consistency and discipline.
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Me finding the person who's been spending all my money.
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There's nothing wrong with having class, there's everything wrong with being classist. Bffr.
Unpopular opinion: there’s nothing wrong with being classist.
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I go use am escape outing taya.
Can’t wait to get married so I’d kill everyone with “my wife”.
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Flash when he sees the gala seller catching up to him.
Imagine if superheroes were in Nigeria.
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Whenever I see this, all I can think of is stew and a helicopter.
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So I was admitted to the hospital overnight yh and this nigga beside was watching porn, like are you sick?.
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Burna boy really knew what he was saying. Dangote still dey find money.
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UCH owing NEPA money is the wildest shit I’ve ever heard.
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if this is ever made into a movie, Smauel L Jackson for Grandad.
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Was ahead of its time fr.
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99% of your problems stem from the single fact that you dont have money.
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@desusislord While I agree with this, Pep has acquired players that did not turn out so great at Mancity. I think he notices early and lays them off quickly.
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Aura farming has to be one of the funniest terms to come from this app bro. 😂.
Aura Farming is the funniest concept in a long time because I'm reading the Bible and get to the part where Jesus was walking on water during a storm for literally no reason and I just burst out laughing.
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“Blue Lamborghini Aventador KJA 567, pls Goan re park”. Me:
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This cartoon tells a story of a girl who had lost her brothers and was suffering from depression. She Imagined them going on a never ending summer everyday building things. Thats why their mother could never see their inventions, cuz it was all in her head. .
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"goan tell daddy you want ice cream". "daddy, brother muri said that I should tell you that I want ice cream".
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My school Wan do Escortion go US that year. The laugh my mama laugh that day as I tell her, I can never forget. Na then I start to realize sey be like Sapa dey. I go UI zoo sha. 🤧.
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Consoling the babe you like after she broke up with her boyfriend, call that simpathy.
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Bro, elite ball recovery.
When he was leaving my place a ring that very clearly belonged to another woman fell out his pocket. When I asked whose it was, he got down on one knee and acted like he was proposing??? I was STUNNED and just told him to get up. That wasn’t the final straw.
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Madman Queue Dey buy food. And I’m not playing.
What's the wildest thing your eyes have seen in Lagos?.
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What in the dune?.
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If you grew up with your parents together, and they are still together, you're very lucky.
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Jay z literally said."My wife Beyonce, I brag different".Wetin be this? 😭.
Realist thing I’ve ever heard🧠. Jay-Z can leave Beyoncé and find a broke back-up dancer that looks better than her. Beyoncé can’t leave Jay-Z bc there isn’t another Jay-Z just walking around. A man changes a woman’s life not the other way around…. YOU.ARE.THE.PRIZE.
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"To live is to risk it all, otherwise you're just an inert chunk of randomly assembled molecules drifting wherever the universe blows you.".
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Ho Lee.
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When your crush says she'd rather die than date you, and you know what has to be done.
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