I found the secret to supporting Elizabeth Warren while simultaneously not being mad at AOC for endorsing Bernie. It’s called being a fucking adult. I recommend it!
My real account was in twitter jail when I tweeted this but I’m free now! Please follow my main account
@lisasaurstomp
for more mediocre political takes and also cute dog pics.
I don’t really know how to say this but today is Boomer’s last day here with me. We found out he has bladder cancer and he’s in pain. So I’ll be saying goodbye to him tonight. Thank you all for loving my sweet boy.
Everyone responding “it’s a generational thing, it was just a compliment” no it’s not, he is a pervert who is sexualizing a child and should be sent to the dick guillotine
Old man in the waiting room this morning said to my four year-old daughter, “wow you’re going to be a problem at 16.”
Apart from violence, what’s the proper response to let old dudes know how creepy and inappropriate that is to say?
Also… SIXTEEN?
Was at a liberal coffeeshop when the news broke, Fix You by Coldplay was playing over the speakers and everyone started crying until a small child stood up and said “Joekanda forever” and then we all burst into wild applause
He is absolutely as dumb as we thought, it’s just that the bar has sunk through the floor and is currently working its way through the molten core of earth’s interior
Someone demanded his treats (medicine) earlier than usual this morning, and now it’s the normal treat dispensing time and he is positively bamboozled as to what the problem is
He went peacefully and quickly. I think he was ready. He would have forced himself to go on forever if I let him, but he deserved to rest. Hug your babies extra tonight.
I’m not sure I believe that she was “unaware” it had a squeaker but nevertheless, Aunt
@gin__erso
and Cousin Peebs were so sweet to gift Otis with his very own lambchop. It made me smile and it made him very violent and murderous.
Walking Otis by himself has been really hard this week, but so many people I see every morning have stopped to ask me about Boomer and then said such nice things when I tell them, it’s so sweet and it does help a little.
I’m almost never on camera during work calls but today my boss said “I need to gossip real quick” and I have never hit that camera on button faster in my life
Help, I found this sweet boy in my complex. He has a collar but no tag or microchip. He’s very sweet but I can’t let him in my house and it’s too hot for him to be outside for long. Animal control won’t take him. What do I do???
Bf insists that TSA precheck isn’t worth it/doesn’t save much time meanwhile I went through security, waited in line and ordered coffee and he’s still fighting his way through the peasant line 😏
REUNITED! This sweet hunk of a man is named Menace and he lives in my complex but never walks here so I didn’t recognize him. Menace is now home and can pee on his owners’ floor instead of mine 🥴
Crazy day at work, delayed reaction/very painful stress acne currently taking over my face, rough therapy session, my vet just called to tell me Boomer’s ashes are ready
I’m feeling salty today
|------------------|
| IF YOU |
| QT A TWEET |
| YOU DON’T |
| NEED TO ALSO |
| RETWEET IT |
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(•ㅅ•) ||
/ づ
Another day, another attempt by me to pry a dead bird out of Boomer’s mouth, except this time he chomped so hard on my finger he broke the skin so I guess welcome to the new strain of bird flu I’m about to experience
Just thinking that if my almost 70-year-old Mormon mother can get me into Pose, watch Paris is Burning before me and be excited when I tell her about Legendary, y’all can stop hiding behind religion or age as an excuse for bigotry
I want to whine for a second about how the heat wave news always leaves out mention of Arizona. Just because it’s hot a lot here doesn’t mean these heat waves don’t suck for us too! And we have to deal with 110+ for weeks at a time. Please let us be part of the pity party.
What’s fun is when you have an appliance repairman over and you keep hearing him mumble “oh shoot” and “uh oh” anyway guess who gets to replace her fridge a few months before she moves to a new house
So my IT knowledge begins and ends at “turn it off then turn it back on” but I feel like having everything on a single system so that one fuckup can take down basically everything in the whole world is…bad, no?
@gin__erso
A hospice nurse occasionally pops up on my tiktok and she says the majority of her patients experience visitors. But they’re always happy occasions and help the person feel at peace about their transition. Sounds like grandpa popped in to say hi.
I’d point out that despite my childless status I still pay taxes that fund your salary but you would have had to actually win an election for that to be true so do the world and favor and crawl back under the rotten log you came from
Political leaders should have children. Certainly they should at least be married. If you aren’t running or can’t run a household of your own, how can you relate to a constituency of families, or govern wisely with respect to future generations? Skin in the game matters
Have an appt to talk to the vet about Boomer’s pain management and now Frank has started pulling out clumps of her own fur (pretty sure is thyroid related), having senior pets is like a game of whack a mole. I exist in a constant state of stress and near financial ruin.
Just when I think I’ve got a handle on what my (very large) company does, I scroll through our brand-approved icon library and now I’ve got some follow-up questions
At the gym this morning one woman told another “you look tired!” and the way she just deadpanned “ok” and stared at the her until she apologized…she has my undying allegiance
The scariest person I ever encountered was the woman on my 11 hour flight from Johannesburg to London who sat perfectly upright and still the entire time. No headphones, no book. Wearing jeans. She is too powerful for this world.
there is a not-insignificant subset of men who are "rawdogging" flights — no entertainment, no headphones, just watching the flight map for 8+ hours (bonus points if you don't pee or eat). i spoke to some for
@GQMagazine
@johnsemley3000
@dv_cassette
I lived in the area/knew a girl who worked there and oh my god the dramaaaaa after all this happened was a sight to behold.
My company updated their device security policy so in order to be able to access my work accounts on my phone it forced me to delete TikTok and I’m sure the absolute physical revulsion and anxiety I feel is not a sign of anything bad