Trinley Goldenberg
@mattgoldenberg
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head of operations @monasticacademy writing a 📖 on how to stop wasting your precious life motivate yourself w/o shame or guilt 🔗👇
Lowell, Vermont
Joined October 2008
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please, i'm begging you
before you spend 60+ hours studying someone, spend at least 10 hours studying cognitive task analysis
it will teach how to model their way of thinking/feeling so you don't end up with vague platitudes but actionable advice
I’m obsessed with how to reach financial freedom.
So, I spent 60+ hours studying how Naval Ravikant thinks about money.
Here’s what I found on becoming a quiet millionaire:
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the book title "Stop Wasting Your Precious Life" usually gets instant positive reactions, like a gut punch
but i worry about shareability - no one wants to identify publically as someone who's wasting their life, or imply that someone else is
suggestions for an alternative?
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If you think that "feeling things in the body" or "somatic awareness" or "intuition" are not real things, try looking at these pics. Do you have a visceral reaction to them?
It turns out you have these visceral reactions all the time! You just need to learn to tune into them.
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I think I may have cracked the code to extremely quick and yet incredibly stable identity change.
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Thread of somatic moves you can do when you have tension, trapped energy, or numbness/blankness in a area 🧵
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I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you
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i've spent the last decade trying to figure out how to motivate myself
in college, i constantly procrastinated and struggled to get myself to do anything
after dropping out, i became obsessed with solving this puzzle
i read every book and tried every system, but i still found
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overwhelm is a signal to get more concrete. so concrete. more concrete than you think. what would it look like to take the next action, what would it feel like, what would it smell like?
overwhelm is a great manager if you can teach it this skill of getting you to be concrete
Overwhelm is a form of fear. It is the moment where you think you have to get out of flow to manage reality.
Hint: Overwhelm is a shitty manager.
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the goal is is to create the best "how to do it" book ever created on motivating yourself and overcoming procrastination
when learning a new topic, i like to use the 3 books technique
1 book that tells me what to do
1 book that tells me why to do it
and 1 book that tells me how to do it
usually the best books do 1 of these 3 really well - it's the ones that try to do it all that i skip
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1/ Self-coercion is one of the most common causes of procrastination. If you commonly tell yourself that you "Have To" or "Should" do a specific action, you probably fall prey to it.
The mental moves required to solve it are also some of the most complex compared to other fixes
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top books for this:
1. working minds by beth crandall et al
2. expanding your world by david gordon and graham dawes
3. a grassroots introduction to tae by nada lou
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Like and I will give you an epic quest.
Retweet and I will give you a blessing for your journey.
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I used to be chronically and habitually late to things. Now I'm "known" for being on time and respecting time in my community. This was a conscious and almost instantaneous shift I made using Perceptual Control Theory (PCT). Here's a 🧵 on how I did it👇.
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what do i call the other types of motivation in the 2x2?
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For so long I refused to express love to myself because I felt like it was "letting myself off the hook". If I loved myself, how would I stop procrastinating? How would become a better person? How would I truly know when I had earned the love if I just gave it to myself?
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@Mithra_Is_Fine
@PrinceVogel
@PYeerk
There's a video of allan pan trying to make it and thinking it's fake.
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The most heartbreaking pattern 💔 that I see often in procrastination is the total disconnection of the action from the result - people have these amazing goals and values and reasons for what they're doing, and then get focused on dumb hacks like trying to "create habits".
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I just realized that this makes human misaligned mesaoptimizers. Evolution "wanted" us to be pure reproduction maximizers but because of our training distribution we ended up valuing things like love, truth and beauty as terminal values. We're simply misaligned AIs run amok.
@sashachapin
@robinhanson
burned into my brain that signalling is often unconscious. People do things that are enjoyable for other reasons AND they're enjoyable because they're good signalling.
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1/ Common confusion about non-coercion: It's about accepting ALL parts of you.
-The part of you that enjoys/doesn't enjoy things
-The part of you that thinks instead of feels
-The part of you that wants to please others.
-The part of you that wants to punish yourself.
🧵
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Hey twitter frens, I'm heading to a monastery for a couple months starting today.
Reply with a Koan I should meditate on.
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1/Let's talk a little bit about oscillating motivation, shadow values, non-coercion, and the problem of revolving productivity systems.
🧵.
@m_ashcroft
@maybegray
@captain_mrs
@visakanv
@QiaochuYuan
I find productivity techniques work really well for me... for some amount of time and then this becomes me.
I stuck with Beeminder for years and just can't get back into it. I had a great scheduling system that lasted months and now, nope it's awful.
No idea why. 😢
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here's what i came up with
explanations below
tag urself
what do i call the other types of motivation in the 2x2?
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As long as
@RoamResearch
position themselves as a "notetaking tool" they're fighting an uphill battle.
They need to position themselves as an alternative to note taking tools, a new category called ______.
That is how they win.
Suddenly, ROAM makes note-taking old fashioned!
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1/ My timeline is full of productivity advice related to making lists, writing thing down, and getting accountability partners.
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i know it's not for everyone, but i feel blessed to live in my little cabin in the woods
in a spiritual community of loving and sincere practitioners
getting to work on what I consider the most important work every day
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There will be a "what it's like to not be a sexworker" panel in which the 7 people at vibecamp who have never done sexwork will answer questions for everyone else.
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some absolute bangers being shared in the don't waste your precious life community
we're creating a place that you learn to motivate yourself in a new way
come join us to get a desire partner, rewire your motivation system, and get free coaching from me (it's free, link in bio)
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The most powerful tweeting app?
-Twitter
But most of us have never seen a tweet.
Here are 17 tweets that will solve that 👇
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🧵i used to view my overwhelm as an enemy
when i faced a daunting project, the overwhelm would take over
paralyzed by complexity, i'd watch opportunities slip away
then i had a realization
what if i could teach my overwhelm to be a supportive guide?
overwhelm is a signal to get more concrete. so concrete. more concrete than you think. what would it look like to take the next action, what would it feel like, what would it smell like?
overwhelm is a great manager if you can teach it this skill of getting you to be concrete
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psa - lifting weights actually does help you relax over tense muscles - they're usually that way because their overcompensating for muscles that aren't strong enough
trying to become “more right-brained” by following a regimen is like trying to relax muscle by lifting weights
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It's my estimation that people who have always done the non-coercion thing should spend 100 days forcing themselves to do scary things. People who have always forced themselves I recommend spend 100 days not forcing themselves into anything.
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There will be a giant whiteboard where people can write their personal definition of postrationality. Everyone will forget it for a few hours each day until someone adds a new definition...
Most of the writing will be illegible.
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There will be a "threadapalooza live" event in which anyone can suggest a topic they'd like there to be a thread about, and anyone else can point to the thread where
@visakanv
already wrote about it more eloquently than you could.
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For the past 12 years, I've been a coach. An important skill I've learned is how to "hold space" to create safety and comfort.
As I started teaching coaching, I learned that 80% of holding space is just 2 skills, that for most people can be taught fairly quickly 👇
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@sadalsvvd
and
@liminal_warmth
will host an "introduction to magick, tarot, and astrology" session that will be the most popular event of the whole camp.
It will eventually end up turning into a flash auction for peoples' souls.
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@eigenrobot
will host the exit poll, which will ostensibly be about how your moral views have changed at vibecamp, but will actually have the effect of making you realize that you logically SUPPORT eating babies as long as they're grown in
@VitalikButerin
's artificial womb.
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to let go of a belief, find MANY meanings for one originating memory
to create a belief, find MANY memories for one meaning
@oxidist
if you want to let go of the thing that sees the memory as good, yes
if instead you want to BUILD a meaning about yourself, then reverse it. instead of many meanings for one memory, you find many memories for one meaning
process here:
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Ohhh, I just realized that most of the pushback against non-coercion is that people feel like they're being coerced into it.
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My dream
@RoamResearch
browser extension once API exists:
When typing, double brackets allow me to search Roam pages.
When double brackets exist on page, they act as links to my Roam database.
When I shift click link, the Roam sidebar opens on the page I'm on.
Roam Everywhere.
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New video for the
#roamcult
:
1. Why traditional spaced repetition software and progessive summarization suck.
2. Progressive expansion, a new tool that works to fix their shortcomings.
3. How to use
@RoamResearch
to implement progressive expansion.
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Working with journaling and self-therapy in
@RoamResearch
is great. I can see previous insights I've had and how this issue has progressed over weeks, onths, and years.
Here's an example of using CFAR's Internal Double Crux technique with Roam's {{diagram}} feature.
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what does this have to do with sacred sexuality and polyamory
this account has gone downhill my friends
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@Aella_Girl
will host an entrance poll that is ostensibly about understanding the moral views of people going to vibecamp, but actually has the effect of making random strangers not at vibecamp believe she's a horrible demon harlot that eats babies.
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Alright let's do this, slow thread on non-coercive habit building.
🧵
@mattgoldenberg
@Malcolm_Ocean
How do I make an action I want to take regularly _inevitable_ without making it feel like coersion until it is habit? Is there good material on non-coersive habit formation? Even doing tiny-habit style mini-celebs as pos rewards often feels coersive
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skillful Dionysian techniques have a progression
1. solve your problem with technique. technique as solution
2. use technique to connect to higher forces beyond yourself. technique as offering.
3. higher forces guide you; strict techniques only when disconnected. technique as
Question:
Whatever technique I use — IFS, meditation, etc. — it tends to stop working after a while.
I kind of don’t want to do it anymore.
Why does this happen?
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you may think this is weird but anna is just saying out loud the types of beliefs that many of us subconsciously hold
i don't deserve love
needing love means i'm weak
showing love means i think the other person is weak
I feel weird about receiving compassion because that's what you give people you think are beneath you.
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one frame on the apollonian/dionysian split
dionysians goes deep into their desires and resistances and surrender so completely that they find something beyond them
apollonians use willpower to cultivate the beyond directly and use it to purify their desires and resistances👇
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Looking for alpha-testers for a new 3 day course (20 minutes a day) on non-coercive motivation. Let me know if you're interested in watching and giving feedback!
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@QiaochuYuan
and
@ElodesNL
will host a combined kissing & crying booth and it will be incredibly popular.
Proceeds will go to the
@evelynharlow_
relief fund.
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Guys I'm shutting down all my other alts including
@eigenrobot
@nosilverv
@QiaochuYuan
and
@dril
. Sorry if you enjoyed them only posting here from now on.
guys i'm sorry but i don't actually have the mental capacity to switch between and have enough content for two accounts at the same time, especially trying to keep the connection secret, so i gave up on posting here
it was nice while it lasted
go follow my main
@mechanicalmonk1
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@Conaw
will host a 3-hour session titled "Introduction to Roam" that involves trying to immanentize the eschaton via transubstantiating the mind of Christ in a collective Zettalkasten.
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@nickcammarata
,
@sashachapin
, and
@m_ashcroft
will hold a joint workshop called "How to Transform yourself" at which 3 people will accidentally become enlightened.
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So it turns out my fear others being better than me stemmed from a fear of being useless, which was ultimately a fear that I would be a void of nothingness.
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of the four book covers, which do you like best?
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The Lefkoe Belief Process is a tool for integrating limiting beliefs and traumatic memories. It's my personal mission to get LBP "into the water supply" of TPOT, like e.g. Focusing, IFS, Metta. Here's how it works:
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People in the crypto space have to realize that this is their competition. Not the other project that has slightly faster transactions times at the cost of slightly higher centralization.
Crypto: we are solving scalability with shards, state channels, sidechains..
Apple: fuck decentralization. We just did 100 billion transactions
Crypto: and for privacy we have have zk-snarks and..
Apple: here's our privacy policy – we don't give a fuck where you spend your money
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Why all the hate for thirst traps? If ya'll wanna post beautiful pictures of your beautiful selves I salute you.
100% rather see a beautiful pic in my feed than another hot take about why I should vote for Bernigieg Warbiden.
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'just feel what you're feeling' is still the goat emotional processing technique
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What are the communities that are thinking clearly about how to make the world a better place? What are their strengths and weaknesses?
My partial list:
-Effective Altruism
-
#GameB
-
@RadxChange
-
@BCorporation
-Crypto
-Permaculture
-Rats/Critrats/Postrats
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There's a part of me that thinks that all the emotional processing/reconsolidation work is just fooling myself, making me feel good in the moment.
But then I find myself reflexively doing actions that used to terrify me (or not even occur to me) and I'm like 👌 this shit works.
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Pretty sure ingroup has access to basically the best self-transformation tech out there, despite being basically a bunch of shitpoasters 🤣
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Both
@Meaningness
and
@ESYudkowsky
will attend, but they mysteriously will never be seen in the same room together.
Someone will swear they saw
@Meaningness
reaffix his mustache to his face once.
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I think "I'm an empath" often means "I lack emotional regulation skills."
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As I began to explore self-love, I started to examine the underlying assumptions behind that attitude.
- Withholding love is a good tool for changing behavior.
- Love should be based on the outcomes one achieves.
- Love is always conditional.
- Love means lack of accountability.
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There will be a "people who are infatuated with
@gptbrooke
anonymous" support group, although those with crushes on
@DarbraDawn
and
@pragueyerrr
may also attend.
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1,600 follower special. Like and I'll tell you why you should unfollow me
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6/ In general, you can think about a hierarchy of self - improvement.
1. Emotional processing to make you more aligned and productive permanently
2. Cognitive strategies that help you connect with the things you want
3. External tools to help you use the cognitive strategies
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@the_wilderless
I don't know I river I think I just carry the grief of the world in there and don't know where else to put it
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People think "coaching is for people who don't have their shit together" but my experience coaching is often that "people who have their shit together view coaching as an integral part of that."
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🧵i don't know the bodywork version well, but for somatic work, i think these are the same as:
1. just sitting with the energy of the stuckness as it comes through the body
2. bringing more energy to the spot until it bursts
its common choice point in transformation work.
a common view is "tight muscles need pressure to release" but ime mostly they need listening.
where listening specifically means:
1. enough tactile sensitivity to mold my hand to the exact shape of the fascia&restriction
2. enough nervous system capacity to hear a stored charge
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@nosilverv
mysticism is the core of real religions, and fundamentalism is what causes them to go wrong
but not all mystical traditions get to nonduality, emptiness, or awakening- some stop at core states like oneness or love
most mystical traditions meet god, but fewer go beyond god
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I'm becoming increasingly convinced that a key thing the EA movement lacks is a complete sense of what it means to cultivate wisdom. In fact, EA's biggest impact on the world right now may simply be shortening the time to misaligned AGI - a failure that could have been avoided.
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@michaelcurzi
will give a papal address entitled "The Moral and Ethical Duty of the Shitpoast".
It will eventually descend* into him giving a line by line aesthetic breakdown of Rick Astley's 1987 masterpiece on the topic.
*ascend
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when learning a new topic, i like to use the 3 books technique
1 book that tells me what to do
1 book that tells me why to do it
and 1 book that tells me how to do it
usually the best books do 1 of these 3 really well - it's the ones that try to do it all that i skip
a book does not need to be actionable or have how-tos. that is modern nonsense
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Like Sasha, I've experienced incredible shifts and how I perceive the world and how it perceives me, using just a few basic tools. I've created baseline self-love, self-confidence, and self-esteem for instance.
🧵
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I'm pretty convinced that aesthetics, identity, beliefs, and feelings are all ways to access the same few types of internal structures with different interfaces.
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When interviewing people who were both very productive, and enjoyed work immensely, they turned out to be remarkably similar in terms of the emotional content of how they related to tasks. Here are the 5 emotions that can make work productive and enoyable:
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Have you tried adding 'sudo' to the beginning of the problem?
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i know this is crazy, but you can't just call something a safe space and have it be safe
you have to earn the right to say that
and yet, somehow just saying it feels like it has power
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My biggest win lately in regards to self love is to get in the habit of thinking of myself as the parent of a child (myself) who I have unconditional love for, and saying what that parent would say.
An unexpected benefit of this is that I've started talking like this to others.
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Low-key getting my mind blown by this book on attachment therapy should I do one of those book reaction
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people don't realize they're doing this with tiredness!
drowsiness can feel overpowering when we grasp it in a specific spot (which most of us do subconsciously)
when we stop grasping, and allow it into our entire body
ir sends calming waves of relaxation throughout
years ago when jhana started working I realized I’d never fully relaxed into pleasure. most pleasures are fleeting, and I’d learned to grasp at it when it showed up out of scarcity. It was healing to instead just let it soak into my body for hours, slowly letting it flow around
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5/ It's trendy these days to say that "We procrastinate to avoid negative emotions."
That's true, but what does that make procrastination?
It's a defense mechanism against taking actions that hurt psychologically.
Procrastination is a tool to prevent psychological self-harm.
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2. Now notice times you were NOT this quality (counterexamples). If this is hard/painful, you can remind yourself that the pain is actually a representation of how much you value this quality.
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But in the long term, if someone continually withholds love as a tool to get me to change... I simply give up on that person. It's those who love me unconditionally that I'm MOST motivated to want to help and provide for.
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"People are fighting over postrationality and being dumb, we need something less legible" -> TPOT
"People are fighting over TPOT and being dumb, we need something less legible" -> ???
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@SamoBurja
will organize and orchestrate a full secession of Texas, incorporate a new country with a radically improved constitution, and install vibecamp leadership at every level of government.
@HiredThought
will be his first in command.
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Stop using cope as a dirty word fuckers.
Coping mechanisms are the shit, they keep you above water.
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Anyways those are my 90% confidence interval predictions for vibecamp! (more may be added later)
Feel free to QT and add your own.
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@Respexy
@DipshitG
@RainbowStarbird
I think you missed the main thrust of his tweet, which is that even showing the NEED for self-care is seen as weakness. It's not about how much stigma any particular behavior has.
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I realized that the very impulse to suppress or ignore the part that was beating myself up was coming from that same set of erroneous assumptions about love. Instead, I had to start by *loving the part of myself that wanted to withold love*.
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