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@gamvchirai
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It’s the fact that you still think he was working 16 hours a day🤭🤭
My dad worked 16 hours a day on minimum wage and had a secret apartment and family in the 90's. This economy is insane
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So Norway banned smartphones in schools and 3 years later, girls’ GPAs are up, their visits to mental health professionals are down 60% and bullying in both boys and girls is down 43-46%. That’s wild
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Crazy me seeing those stats at a time when I’ve been seriously thinking about the effects of my phone usage on my productivity and in turn, mental health
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Someone said they would pick me up for dinner at 6pm. It’s only 6:23 and my mom has already reminded me twice that she didn’t include me pa supper 💀💀💀
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Minding your business on the road wodonherwa ne avo pa windshield 😭😭
Just wondering... instead of the exotic trees, why can't we plant fruit trees in and around the CBD ?
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Yesterday I ran into someone from my old school and they asked me why TF I came back to Zim. I was like why did YOU come back and he legit said I’m a zanu baby, what’s your excuse? 💀💀💀
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Researching Zim companies is so stressful you’ll really open their website and find lorem ipsum😭
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Someone tweeted that this tweet will continue to show up on your TL until you tweet your problems and now I’m starting to believe it. 😒
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Diaspora folk missing the sense of community back home should also realise even that is not there anymore. Families are now scattered all over the world and those who’ve stayed are too busy trying to survive. Community doesn’t look anything like it used to
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Takarambidzwa kumapfeka ku Queen of Hearts🥲
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"Raw eggs are great for a fitness diet. If you don't like the taste just add cocoa flour sugar butter baking powder & bake at 180 for 30min"
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My biggest qualm with this outfit is every time you sit down your coochie is going to be rawdogging random seats?😩😩😩
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😭😭😭😭😭
People in long distance relationships how do you do it?? I just got offered a bite over the phone and i said “huuum mmh yummy!”
So ridiculous
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@ngonimaurice
We’re spending too much time on social media they hype has us forgetting hunger is real😭
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Never beating the exposure allegations 😔
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It’s this hun’s last day at work today and she brought this cake 😂🔥
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Women really just be minding their business then get dragged because their man tweets anyhow and this is why you should never date a man with a Twitter account 😭😭😭
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You know what. This is what I miss about living in a functional country. Just randomly buying pointless shit so easy. In Zim you have to join 7 WA groups, pay someone a 30% runner fee, meet someone in CBD only between 12-2 on weekdays, 50% deposit, in the end you’re like nvm😂
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Me laughing at this tweet:
Coming from a country that put stones on their bank notes just so their currency could carry weight.
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Y’all I dragged my entire family to go donate blood and every single one of us was ineligible for one reason or the other 💀💀💀💀
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These are fun drinking games. Kwete zvema help the person next to you take their top off or drink🥱
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Imagine if we were still getting sadza in the morning in this space era 💀
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I have a cousin ari kuita kusauka nenhamo but everyday he posts praise about ED and Zanu on his status and I don’t even understand.
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Kissing a statue that thousands of strangers has kissed?
Victor Noir’s grave in Père - Lachaise cemetery by Patrick Magaud, 1984. Noir is perhaps more famous for his death and grave than work. He was a journalist who was shot dead; the grave consists of a full-sized bronze statue of the man lying down as if he had just been shot.
The
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Men talk about marriage as if they were held at gunpoint getting into it 😂😂😂
I work day and night. Provide for this family. What benefit does a man get from a marriage? When will men ever enjoy the fruits of their labour?
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Treat people well because everyone deserves respect and kindness, not because you’re worried they may be “above” you one day. 🙂
Be careful on how you treat unemployed family members and friends, No condition is permanent, Life can surprise you!
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A gentle reminder to the “Zim inongoda uine mari” crew that when it comes to it, money can’t save you when the systems are broken. Tragic.
More than ten doctors wrote to me this morning correctly expressing their legitimate anger at what happened to one of their colleagues yesterday in Manicaland.
This is Dr Mthabisi Nembaware.
He was involved in a road traffic accident yesterday, he was coming from a rural
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@rachel_mbanje
The First Capital Bank USD account has a good Visa card (the Gold Card). You don’t need to transfer the money from your account to your card, they’re already linked
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Stairmaster hired Pilates’ publicist
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I love how Fadzayi Mahere rocks that suit and tie look. If I worked an office job I’d totally give it a go
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For fuck’s sake!
If you think you're good in English, start a sentence with, "For".
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I don’t even follow ooyf but everyday at least one tweet of her fighting with a different person pops up on my TL I’m starting to think she’s the problem 😂😂😂
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Even if you’re not trying to lose weight, exercise is still important for cardiovascular health, lung capacity, bone strength, mental health, warding off chronic illness etc. It doesn’t strictly have to be jogging, just find something that you enjoy and keep moving
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Yuhwi pleated skirt ne sports bra?😂😂
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Critical, life-saving healthcare isn’t even accessible to all but yes, let’s make DNA tests mandatory because of ✨men’s feelings✨
When people say DNA tests should be mandatory, who is supposed to pay for that? Also considering that most deliveries are at Rural Health Centers, City Council clinics and at home.
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Okay but this doesn't change the fact that there are almost 50 million kangaroos is Australia and 3.5 million Uruguay citizens. If the kangaroos were to invade Uruguay each person would need to fight at least 14 kangaroos.
BREAKING: Ever Given has been refloated, set free and is now on the move.
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Today my pastor’s sermon was about how you should use the last few days of this year to create space in your life for what’s really important and maybe someone on my TL needs to hear it. Don’t mind my messy notes, I was trying to keep up.
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I can also help. If anyone needs to check on someone in Zim and they can’t afford to call, DM me and I’ll call them for you. I know it’s not the same as talking to them but maybe some reassurance that they’re okay can help.
#ShutDownZim
#Zimshutdown
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Eish. Saka manje uchaita sei?
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I’ll never forgive my mom for refusing to buy me these when I was younger. She really stood between me and my Zimbabwean heritage😩😩😩😩
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I was today years old when I learnt sungura music is actually an offshoot of a Kenyan genre locally dubbed Kanindo music (after Kenyan producer Oluoch Kanindo; apparently one of his studios was named Sungura, the Swahili word for tsuro because vaimhanya nemagitare😂)
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Wouldn’t life be beautiful if you could just screw your boobs off and leave them in the gym locker or hang them up on the wall before your run🙃
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SCREAMING my brother just got his licence and he’s like pandinopiwa mota ndiri kunoona (his ex who left him for a guy with a car) first💀💀
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Laughs in boarding school
I once dated a woman who can open a tin of baked beans using a knife 😭😭
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So 75% of new HIV infections between ages 15 and 25 in Zim are in women
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Stop giving out state secrets 😂
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I'm not going to post my glo up because it's still pending but I just thought I'd let you know when I took this photo I really thought I was THAT bitch. 😂😂
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Food run at 6pm
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So apparently you can buy iron and carbon for the price of just one alloy. What a steel.
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Agreed. 2 weeks max
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I remember when I joined twitter I spent weeks trying to figure out who this OOMF person was because everyone seemed to know them 😂😂
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Everything is better raw
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The girlies are always getting baited and they bite every single time
How many ladies can honestly say.. I don't depend on make-up to look beautiful ☺. Drop ur natural pic without filters۔
🤔
Thread!
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Kungoti hatina hedu kwekuenda but zvekugara mu Zim ndezvekushaya 😂
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The assumption that everyone born earlier has moved out🌚😂
Dear 1995,1996,1997,1998,1999,2000,2001.
It's time to move out of your parents house🌚
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Been standing in front of my mirror for 5 good minutes because I just cannot believe I’m this gorgeous 😩
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I found a thread where women are discussing their biggest regrets in life. The ones that appeared most were getting married, having a baby with an aint shit man, not listening to their mom and not taking education seriously.
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Nungo chaidzo
Ndechipi chinhu chekuti ukasiya muhupenyu hwako unobudirira?
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We are within 😂
Hawu, so whole time I’ve been thinking my Instagram is broken because I couldn’t find the ciao filter kante it’s on Snapchat 😭😭💀💀
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@TheCowBoy263
The way I give into the doom scroll for hours then end up stressed out because now I have to complete tasks in half the time is kinda ridiculous lol
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One time someone asked my uncle if her wife was staying kumusha and he was like “Yuhwi ndogomugarisa kumusha kuti imombe here?” and I was so led😂😂😂
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The funny part is it doesn’t matter how strongly parents feel about these things, kids will still do what they want in end😂😂😂😂
I think one conservative standard I’d make sure i uphold is my children not having sex in their teenage years, idc idc. you will have to hold till you are past your teen years 👍.
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As someone who’s bussed it to Vic Falls before I’m here to tell you for free that it’s not worth it 😂😂
CAG to Vic falls $25 you leave at night and arrive in the morning around 5/6 am, you get a place there to clean up maybe $20 plus food for the whole day $15, you spent the whole day there uchiwona you spent maybe $50 pazvese wokwira back another $25.
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The origins of this practice dates back to the cassette era. In an attempt to curb piracy DJs started interrupting songs so people wouldn’t dub them from the radio. It seems it just stuck. That said, most Zifm stereo DJs don’t do this.
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And the GD6s and Ford Rangers are always impatiently tailgating us with those bright af lights all glaring in our mirrors while we try to navigate potholes😩
People who drive lows cars in Zimbabwe are the most patient people I can think of right now …
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His girl was sitting there minding her business now she finna get dragged because her man is a fool😭💀
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Yeah I love my name and all but sometimes I just want to introduce myself without having to talk these people through 7 practice rounds of saying it🙄
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People want you to live in a shack so they know you’re REALLY saving for your own house😂😂
And then there are some people who brags about living soft life coz they rent an apartment that costs 300us or 500us+ at the same time they don’t even have stand😂😂😂 kupusa? Kusafunga? Chii?😒
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Hanti munogara muchiti you prefer each other’s company pano endai😂😂
Doek and Slay, and Girlfest makes sense. Why would I wanna chill with 1000 other niggas?????
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