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brantley

@brantleynow

Followers
495
Following
595
Media
1,455
Statuses
7,411

and the third woe cometh quickly

Joined March 2015
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
You actually have to do it, you have to forgive every single person in your life
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@libsoftiktok “constitution, freedom of choice, blah blah blah”
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@voxdotcom come again i couldn’t hear you the first time from all that cock in your mouth
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@annakhachiyan would / would / would
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@Fukkleknuckle @MercedesBenzCDN when a toddler customizes player
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@Lan_Dao_ @ElectionLegal if she makes eye contact marry her
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@douzmanian it's contrary to buddhist wisdom, which sees feelings as ephemera to detach from for clarity and resilience. the west's surrender to the vicissitudes of feeling as a locus for identity are why we're knee-deep with SSRIs and squawking about lowering the voting age to 16.
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@mtracey and he literally had a picture ready for the “i wouldn’t be married to this woman if pence had his way” beat, like, how?
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@brantleynow
brantley
6 years
@ChloeAngyal @HuffPost Where’s the grave? I feel like dancing.
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@WSJ FUCK THIS FUCK THE JOURNO - BIG BANK CIRCLE JERK, 30 YR MORTGAGE IS THE SMARTEST MOST ATTAINABLE HEDGE AGAINST INFLATION AVAILABLE TO THE MIDDLE CLASS
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@BDSixsmith Entirely predictable, don’t worship Youth, it’s a god that disposes of its tools
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@FischerKing64 Kennedy makes the case repeatedly that if anything in his book about Fauci was incorrect he would’ve already been sued for libel. It’s a damning book.
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@brantleynow
brantley
6 years
@ClaraJeffery Incredible news. Smite them all. Hasten the demise.
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@GraduatedBen @divinetrickr Scotch-Irish will always and forever hate being told what to do
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
Mona Lisa the first gassed up mid
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@brantleynow
brantley
7 years
@GarrettBroad the scientific method doesn't care where it came from or how it got here. it's still the only reason you're able to tweet this ineffectual protest.
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@goupelin @KevinAl33957075 @spectatorindex I like that a FRIENDS avi tweets dismissively of American culture
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@FischerKing64 Nature selects for vitality We’re ensconced in the technosphere, which selects for thought obedience But the old code doesn’t die, it stalks the ruins ravenously
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@JWR_UK Are there doctors in the UK that could offer you a spine transplant?
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@conan_esq IRRIGATING MOUNTAINTOPS WITH HAND HEWN STONE
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@Fratty_Hearst called Antibody
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@KANTBOT20K 90% of our culture exists until the battery dies
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@HuffPostCanada Some mothers also leave their infants inside parked cars on 95 degree days.
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@ElectionLegal A crack shot could get close…but only T could pull that “snorlax” conclusion What a cherry
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@yesyyyr It’s the most bizarre breakup I’ve ever experienced.
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@kaschuta I love making sweeping epochal predictions based on the behavior of minuscule amounts of people that found their way to my eyes via a media surveillance system that thrives on my addiction and anger
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@ElectionLegal Lol she deleted it because it stang too much and is hilarious and a specific enough comparison that she’ll probably be parsing it out for another day Incredible work, Perry
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@brantleynow
brantley
10 months
@employedgf In heaven we’ll all smell like Jeremy
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@brantleynow
brantley
6 years
@ftobes Shaming is a tactic of the impotent.
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@Plinz what if every waiter asked if you agree to receiving your food warm
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@brantleynow
brantley
4 years
@andersleehere Find the clip of the guy, and I can’t believe I still remember this after one viewing 10 yrs ago, who says “when I’m reading a book I want sex, when I’m having sex I want to be reading a book”
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@ElectionLegal He could’ve saved this country
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@Jonandstuff @ybca congrats on screening your genocide fantasy to the seven people lounging around this low-rent ikea display room.
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@JayNedaj 1 McDonalds 2 Checkers 3 Popeyes Cajun fries 4 Chick-fil-a 5 Wendys Burger King is dead last
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@LandsharkRides Library of Congress has mp3s of old tapes some ethnographer made in the 70s. Found one from my hometown. A great grandmother sharing stories she heard about the first settler trail through Georgia. Bobcat carrying a four year old up a tree.
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@PaulSkallas The only Nietzsche that ever really stung to me was how it’s revolting to be the object of infatuation
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@brantleynow
brantley
7 years
@cenkuygur @hasanthehun @benshapiro why on earth does anyone pay attention to someone who wears necklaces over a top-bottoned shirt?
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@lotus__point I was in a food court in South Georgia reading GONE WITH THE WIND because of your pod, this 50 something year old black lady walked by and goes “I love that book, and best movie ever made” lotta libs will never be able to do the algebra on this one
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@brantleynow
brantley
7 years
@jordanbpeterson @Ira_Wells @RubinReport @jonkay IRA: You're WRONG, and PROBLEMATIC, and deserve scorn and banishment!!! JPB: Why, exactly? IRA: Thanks...but I'll pass.
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@feminiscience women are predisposed to dissatisfaction and many will take abuse over boredom
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@brantleynow
brantley
7 years
@BretWeinstein Comedy is supposed to be dangerous, anarchic. These choads do nothing but buttress the status quo.
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@brantleynow
brantley
4 years
@bimboubermensch this is cover for the nursing homes because that would mean many more people going down
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@lotus__point promenades with fountains, ferns and escalators, in every store someone who smiled and helped and didnt turn a camera on you at the smallest perceived slight to broadcast your face to possibly millions for extortion in an evershifting terrain of hobbesian identity warfare
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@brantleynow
brantley
6 years
@DailyMirror totally chill with this outcome. the world turns.
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@annakhachiyan government mandated polyamory with any hint of sexual preference or discretion vigilantly policed
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@EmojiMashupBot This one has nothing from either
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@ElectionLegal Pence Hasbulla 2024
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@Delicious_Tacos that’s literally all they’re doing but the stereo is western civ
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
The essence of poetry is understand language is at all times serving two masters equally: the phoneme, the simple pleasure of the babble, and the signified, the spirit of what we communicate Poetry always does both
@ElectionLegal
Pericles 'Perry' Abbasi
2 years
her: you must think something rhymes with orange if you think we fucking me:
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@LandsharkRides The highest is white: intuition
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@brantleynow
brantley
4 years
@shoe_sticky yeah we can’t even manufacture consent anymore
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@lotus__point TPN has brought so much beauty and fresh thought into my life. Driving up to last year’s big family thanksgiving I played the GWTW episode to my parents in the car and my mother cried. You truly have no idea how special this is to people. Keep being honest and bold.
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@switchinblades @KnuckSandwich @miskhotaaaa Sex and bricklaying aren’t the same thing.
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@StilNotHavin_It @GhostGuthrie @lovely_2_c_u this epistemological skepticism is the cornerstone of her wisdom and genius
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@Howlingmutant0 @BonifaceOption Haven’t seen a single lib friend on insta share this. They know gloating over it is impossible
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@insectbrah Another vote for Gatsby, what a forgettable tryst
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@annakhachiyan having your cake and barfing it too
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@Logo_Daedalus Hash brown oval worth more than entire movements of modern art
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@Oghma_EM imagine what he could’ve done with an overdrive pedal and a gibson SG
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@andrewschulz Chael is funnier than most standups
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@NeoBactrian buy them a venti frappe spiked with 4 milligrams of powderized fentanyl
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@annakhachiyan Photography will always be the medium of opportunists given it requires so little effort beyond the recognition of a beauty you had no hand in manifesting.
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@louanben @EmojiMashupBot no explosion no blushing. DOESNT MATTER
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
@annakhachiyan There’s an entire book in this tweet
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@ZOLAJESUS sealed off in your bedroom making hermet masterpieces will never, ever, ever equal the vitality of performers in union charting a course toward the holy spirit
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
My most enduring memory from Southern Baptist childhood was the testimonies given voluntarily by members of the congregation, brutal and honest and alive. Many made me cry. Nothing in American culture even approximates that anymore. This gets very close.
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@annakhachiyan i can pass a copy of Infinite Jest through your thigh gap
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@DarrenJBeattie she looks exhausted and scared
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@brantleynow
brantley
4 years
@shoe_sticky what fascinates me about vanity is that, like ignorance, it tends to shield its victim from realizing contagion. how when a mosquito sinks in the proboscis first a substance is released to anesthetize.
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@brantleynow
brantley
7 years
@GarrettBroad Ethiopia abolished slavery in 1942. You have no argument.
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@brantleynow
brantley
1 year
@CityBureaucrat Love how the people who’ve repeatedly concealed the efficacy of a mandatory injection deign to tease to me the deepest secrets of known life
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@brantleynow
brantley
5 years
@CountDankulaTV Same but France
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@brantleynow
brantley
2 years
Art is simple. It’s good or it’s bad and you know immediately
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@brantleynow
brantley
3 years
@ElectionLegal is this on the LSAT?
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