Mikey Bordenero
@bordenero21530
Followers
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Statuses
149
“Tallahassee’s Most Capable Bachelor” winner in ‘86.
Fairfield, NJ
Joined January 2024
Nothing better than bird watching at the pool with costas. Ladies, just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean Mike isn’t looking!.
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@brad_birch69 Oh I did Brad. She doesn’t understand mikes free and loose for the first time in a while… maybe she never will. Have a day,.Mike.
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Men used to go to war. Today I spent 20 minutes choosing between Jasper Blue and Cabana blue on the Peter millar website. I wish I could just die in a European war like the greatest generation or something.
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Has anyone ever had luck with one of these?? Lmk. Cheers,.Mike
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The correct way to enjoy a bong is cigarette hit, bong rip, and back to the cig. Any feedback?? I’m all ears. Happy hunting,.Mike
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Some nights you win, some nights you lose. Tonight Mike didn’t win. We will be back. Embrace the hog. Cheers,.Mike
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Auburn losing to Berkeley? Yep, Kamala and the DNC had something to do with this. Sad the establishment can’t ever let the south win.
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@GarretWeedcock Depends on how you listen to him. If you only listen to the songs about him fucking dudes yes, but otherwise he’s got some straight songs. I point you in the direction of novacane. Hope this helps!.
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A truly multi-ethnic feast. Liberals would still find a way to call this racist. Happy travels,.Mike
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You’re never really working when you do what you love. Happy Tuesday everyone #businessowner #delilife #comegetsome
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50% off PM + free shipping, to those who celebrate. Cheers,.Mike
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If the eurotards to one thing right, it’s their breakfast. Have a day. Cheers,.Bordenero
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@huskerenjoyer Everytime I see one of your tweets, I get more and more surprised that you’re black. You really are one of the good ones!. Cheers, .Mike.
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The missus is already on my ass…would not want to be her if Engerland loses🤣👊🏴
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The Biden/Waltz administration is probably pissed that my burner is back. Kamala and her “second gentleman” might be crying as we speak. Cheers,.Mike.
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Anyone with an entrepreneurial mindset took her at +540 to win gold at the start of the Olympics. Might as well use that chromosome to help me out. Cheers,.Mike.
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@Ricky_jones45 Get a few transfusions in you and hit on their moms. Usually pretty therapeutic for me.
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@barstoolsports I once met the great “Joe Robbie”, the REAL stadium owner. If he saw this shit he’d be rolling in his grave. Incredible person, and boy did he like his wild turkey🍻.
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Chicken chimichurri fajitas on the menu tonight. If anyone has any problem with this at all, please feel free to reach out
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I thought the day my daughter died was the worst day of my life… Southgate proves to go above and beyond yet again
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There’s nothing like working with a 60 something year old Colombian who does all the work and doesn’t speak a lick of English. Looking to bum one of his reds later…. Will keep you posted. Happy Monday,.Mike
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@MalcolmDem10409 Give it to me straight MDB. Is this the type of tail I’d be into?? Not all of us are into big “snow bunnies”. If not I’d still be interested in the social aspect of the club.
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Half chubbed. Anyone in the greater gainsville area with a bag; please reach out. Regards,.Mike
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@harryadfreaky I try man. Sometimes you have to settle for a field goal and take what they give you.
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@TheSteveBalboni @MalcolmDem10409 Polynesian, Steve. There’s lines even Mikey won’t cross. Lmk if you have any more questions. -#jerseymikes.
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@GarretWeedcock Something about that broad in the back just doesn’t sit right with Mike…. #jerseymikes.
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@GarretWeedcock @sunbeachbabex Garret,. A real bushwhacker isn’t afraid of a little dirty work. It’s time you put your pride aside and embraced the bush, like our fathers and their fathers before them. Hope this helps,.Mike.
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@FecalSalsa I saw drink and I voted for it. Maybe contributing to society is the better play long-term but you’ve earned yourself a cold one! Hope this helps.
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@JohnLeFevre I’d vote for her if she stepped on my balls or something of equal regard. Mike’s vote can be bought!! Offer applies to Natalie Biden or any other freaky girl with power. If you want to control the masses, sex sells. Hope this clarifies,.Mike.
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@AshleaSimonBF I’m normally not attracted to non Italian women but I could give you a piece of my spicy sausage
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Still hungover. Need to rally again tonight. Does Mike take a nap or sip on a few banquets? Open to suggestions, lmk.
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@larrylovespot Didn’t think you could top last weekend I’ll be totally honest Larry. Glad to see you’ve got some more in the tank. I look up to you in a weird way Lar. Do a womp for me if you get the chance.
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@TheSteveBalboni Long night to say the least Steve. Not my best work not my worst work. I’ll check around the store for you. Best,.Mike.
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@England Years of torment and misery. Pain beyond imagination. As I grow older, I yearn for the sweet release of death as that might be the only way to end the cycle of hope you’ve caused me. Fire southgate.
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@higgins69255 Sands Shawn. Only the blackest of the Bahamians drink them. Hope this helps,.Mike.
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“Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard.”.-Mike.
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@fnyonkers @MalcolmDem10409 @IAmLilRico Son all that smoking has gone straight to your head. I wouldn’t need my magnum to put you straight into the ground.
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@CridneySrosby @Billybooboocap Are we taking lines for the smile and silent dap/awkward hug?? Might parlay that with a “what’s up with you” myself if the bookie takes it.
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@TheSteveBalboni Try their cousin with a yellow jacket on. Be careful, they sting!. All the best,.Mike.
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@Ricky_jones45 @julianaraynor Spot on analysis yet again Ricky. Wow. Juliana, I don’t speak for Rick but I would be extremely interested in literally anything you would want. Anything. Have a night,.Mike.
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@Ricky_jones45 Cheers Ricky. Glad to see we’re on the same page. Fat women are like a gas station: there’s one on every corner but only need to visit them every hundred miles or so. Cheers,.Mike.
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@GarretWeedcock @larrylovespot Cheers Garret. Might have been dickriding a little too much admittedly. I have too much pride to delete it now! . -Mike.
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Tan Tebow does it again. This is what happens when you let one of them take the reins. The old Jerry would’ve never let this happen.
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@Ricky_jones45 Like Icarus, you always keep me from flying too close to the sun Ricky. Thanks as always,.Mike.
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@MalcolmDem10409 The more they try to persecute us, the harder we’ll hit back. Stay strong, we will rise again👊.
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@doggincartgirls I can believe it! Although, and I must insist, she was Polynesian* Hope this clarifies.
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@mikevick166 Coke and twitter. If you’re looking for a more “natural” way I guess you can do a dopamine reset, if you’re gay. Hope this helps.
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@FecalSalsa I was a little skeptical when I saw the original tweet but I’m glad you chose the best beer on gods green earth. Might I suggest Ventura highway or reminiscing to pair with it. -Mike.
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Can any Tallahassee locals give me the name of a strip joint?? I’m thinking somewhere where the girls are dirty and the drinks are cheap. Lmk.
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@TheSteveBalboni Idk but I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to bang a candidate this bad since I saw that picture of young Hillary. But you know how Mike feels about colored chicks.
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@CalWeaver1 @Trevorwelds Unless 8 million dead people vote again the libtards won’t steal this one. 🇺🇸🤝🇮🇹.
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@WallStreetApes @DC_Draino Of course it was! Who else…👃. Everytime I hear soros a little hope in me dies.
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@petermillarpaul Thanks Paul I’ll keep it in mind. I ended up picking up “birdie time” half off.
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@NHLxEPL Spend $250 on it from Smoke cartel. Take it up with the higher ups. Wasn’t pleased myself when I saw the size, that being said Hootie rips like a dream.
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I’d be concerned about Cumala getting the nomination if she wasn’t a colored broad. Can’t imagine that actually gets any traction. Thoughts or questions?. -Mike.
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@TheSteveBalboni I might fold. They just “went to the bathroom”, no word since. Best of luck .Mike.
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@Trevorwelds Trevor,.I do not appreciate any attempt at humor during literally the hardest time in my life. Alesia would be rolling in her grave if she heard the shit that comes out of your mouth.
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@larrylovespot I reccomend memento to everyone I meet Larry. Might be a tough watch after an eddie though…. Insane ending. -Mike.
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Triplets. Game 7, in TD garden. This is the make or break point. Good luck,.Mike.
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Update/PSA:. I have an appointment with my doc at 8:00 AM sharp. I haven’t felt this bad since I brought home a questionable broad from the strip back in ‘86. Best,.Mike.
@bordenero21530 Get some burts bees and rub it around the tip a couple times. Trust me that trick has saved me more than a couple times. Try it and get back to me. - Garret.
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@JonnyBones Still thinking about cum aren’t we Jon?? Or are we talking about your wife this time.
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@soupmode69 Love to see the golfers tan corn. Keep up the good work on the black stone👊👊. -mike.
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