Docti_Ify
@MOtales27
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Tales from my house job journey.... Medical Doctor Wife Mother Feminist
Benin-City, Nigeria
Joined April 2021
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Life is funny, my friend tried to conceive for 5 years with no luck. She decided to do IVF, it was successful, she had twins. She sha got pregnant on her own 3 months after giving birth.
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We did Neurosurgery wardrounds when I was in 400L, it started at 7:30am and ended by 2pm, going through almost all the wards in the hospital. I was the only one that didn't look like they were about to faint, thanks to Eba and Egusi soup, I knew the day will be long, so I loaded.
Fufu and Egusi soup is not breakfast
Fufu and Egusi soup is not breakfast
Fufu and Egusi soup is not breakfast
Fufu and Egusi soup is not breakfast
Fufu and Egusi soup is not breakfast
Fufu and Egusi soup is not breakfast
Fufu and Egusi soup is not breakfast
😏
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My friend gisted me then,how a man gathered his wife's certificate up to uni level and burnt them. She stayed in the marriage and the man was smug, thinking he had put her in her place. She Sha found his documents and burnt them, then she left the marriage.
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I've perfected my not surprised face as a Doctor. When I take history and the patient tells me something shocking , I've trained my face to be just blank. They will now be surprised, Doctor you are not shocked. I'm like naa, not all but in my head, I'm shouting iyee ooo iyeee oo
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He hated going for postings, in one posting were attendance was mandatory, he came for like two weeks, stopped coming and switched off his phones. Lecturers went from threatening to show him pepper to being genuinely worried. He turned up towards the end of posting, said he had
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300L, I was so depressed I would fail, My Dad & Mom sat me down and told me it was ok to fail, they will support me no matter what. They used to tell me only their success stories, but they laid out their failures that day. I found out my Dad's cousin had committed suicide
When I told my dad I was going to repeat a year in medical school, he was preparing pap, immediately I said it, it was like a shock to him, he dropped the stuff in shock and tears dropped from his face, I didn't know when I joined.
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A man was shot in the chest with a local gun, so he had pellets dispersed in his chest, some of them went too deep and couldn't be removed. He was complaining but the surgeon asked him to leave it. He came for appointment one day, with a cup of bullets saying a trado-
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A wife was crying in my consulting room, she had no idea about her new hubby mental illness. Her SIL was consoling her and then wife goes to attend to husband. Na so SIL and BIL burst laugh, said shey she wan marry, she never start to cry. SIL calls other family
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I don't know if I'm the only one that finds this annoying. You finish attending to a patient and they hand you the phone for you discuss your plan with their Doctor or Nurse relative that lives abroad. I don't appreciate it,If they know better than me let them treat you at home
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been arrested, that police had mass arrested people and he was unlucky to be in the wrong place. He was forgiven and wrote exam. I know the guy's disdain for postings, so when we graduated, I asked him to tell me the truth. Everything was a lie, guy no wan come posting.
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2 became 4
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Medical Doctor removed all these bullets.. The surgeons said they had to confirm and did chest x-ray, all the bullets were still in the chest.
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Patient's relative came with spo2 of 87%, told relative we had to give Oxygen. Relative said no "na so Dem give my mama oxygen, she come die" i convinced them to allow us give O2. Few hours later, patient dies, I saw them resuscitating, turned back and ran.
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@OliseEke
My husband is like you, see me wanting to shrink myself, Guy no gree oh..... He carried my CV and started moving run with it, to get me Residency. I will die for that man
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Because he had failed an exam.... He was very bright and always did well, this was the first exam he failed and his father was harsh and shouted at him. He went to his room and killed himself.
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I'm a proud feminist oh, You cannot use it to insult me.
When I say I am a feminist, I mean I advocate for women to be more than just mom and wives... I advocate against Domestic violence, child marriages, Sexual assault and Financial abuse... I advocate for financial
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When I was pregnant and unmarried HO and a Registrar shouted to the hearing of medical students and patients... "Dr Ifueko ya pregnant, I don't remember eating your rice oh".... I went to the call room and ugly cried, feeling like such an embarrassment.. if not for my mom ehn.
What was the darkest moment of your life? How did you go through it?
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Almost everyone in my hospital is hustling, Doctor, I sell female wears, I sell crate of egg, Doctor I wash cars, Dr I do event planning, Doctor I bake cake, Dr I sell perfume.... Doctor no fit breathe for this hospital....
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I was constituting medications for a patient, when her daughter brought out the shiniest, most beautiful red apple, I've seen. I walked up to her with my big belly to beg, I was so embarrassed. She understood, she had only one apple, so she cut for me, I ate with shame. Lol
So I made stew yesterday and a pregnant woman in my estate visited me.
Immediately I saw her, I knew why she came, I just dished her food for her and gave her cold bottle water, guess who was dancing home🤣🤣🤣
This morning, her husband came to say thank you. He said he was
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Making fun of the wife of their brother. Laughing at her and talking about how they have successfully removed their brother problems from their hand. I just sit down there with straight face dey shout Omo for mind.
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A car hit a man & he had to be rushed to the hospital, the injuries were not life threatening but when they did an x-ray, it was discovered he had Bone cancer, the earliest and easily treatable stage.Orthopedic doctors were like the accident was a blessing in disguise
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If you as a Doctor,(as in you graduated with MBBS MBchB from a university not Auxillary medicine) tell a patient they have Malaria-Typhoid, you are a bloody quack, Dem suppose use your degree wrap bole.
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You believe your brother mental illness is spiritual, why you come bring am come federal Neuropsychiatry dey stress me, I resemble babalawo. After clerking, I tell you diagnosis, you dey rebuke me, mstchewww.
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I changed name in newspaper and affidavit... Then I went to bank queued for hours to submit changed of name, then for NIN, my husband went by 3am to write name on list, then they gave us date, sat for several hours to change name on NIN. Everywhere you go it stresses you, so stfu
Change of name is not stressful, liar. Don’t even come with that mumu excuse. Pay 20k or less and everything will be done including newspaper publication.
There will even be a caveat on the publication reading “All documents bearing my former name remain valid. Relevant
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There is no family history of road traffic accident
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@SheikhAnalo
I can't advise her to divorce her husband because he is mentally ill oh. That's unethical and I would be stigmatizing the patient
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The great Prof Udoh, pioneer of Neurosurgery in Ubth, failed his MB. He was initially so depressed but he said it made him read harder, that's when he had the chance to reread Neuroanatomy and he fell in love with it and became a Neurosurgeon.
Fam, a young student reached out. She failed her MB exams and has been contemplating suicide.
She is struggling with the shame of repeating the year and thinks leaving medicine may be the alternative path.
I am looking for a Doctor who repeated in medical school. She is hoping
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My 2nd baby, they use nylon sutures that got buried in the incision. For it to be removed, the Dr cut my healed sutures open w/o anaesthesia and was yanking it out, while I screamed my head off. Only giving me L/A wen another colleague complained it's not right. When he finally
I remember the time when I gave birth to my daughter. They had to keep me in the hospital for 10 days because I wasn’t feeling well. Every time I tried to stand up, I fainted. At one point, I even stopped breathing, according to my husband. He panicked and called a friend who was
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When I see medical students, I always try to teach them, especially basic things that they can see in exams. I used to be unhappy when I was a student and I would seat with Regs for hours and just be ignored. You can't be collecting teaching allowance for nothing now.
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I'm in the 5%, I can't crash read to save my soul so I read for 45 minutes to 1 hour almost everyday, go for discussions and when exam is around the corner, Im very chill, sleep well, eat and casually flip through my jotters and notes.
You could give med students 10 years to study for an exam and 95% of them would still start preparing one day before...
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The day I knew I attract work, is when I was told to choose rheumatology unit, that there is no work... I entered the unit and patients started flooding in, SLE they said is rare in males, I had male patients. Consultant was just confused, why are we having so many patients,
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I juggled a job, being a young mom and wife.. Took a loan to write my primaries and passed.. I'm going to be a surgical Resident 🥺🥺🥺🥺.
.. My dream since 200L medical school, may God see me through.
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Yesterday,I saw my secondary school teacher. He had brought his relative, I asked him for his casenote and immediately attended to him. Even though he had just come. Na my teacher, he deserves special treatment. If not for the economy sef, I for pay for their medications.
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Patient had emergency appendectomy, immediately after he was conscious from surgery, wife gave him rice and chicken to eat, he develops paralytic ileus, they rush to OR. He is back to the ward, regains consciousness and drinks water. The managing consultant wan mad.
Burrhole procedure in the next 1 hour after being on NPO.
Goes to the ward to counsel and seek consent, patient don dey chow some kind nice rice and stew.
Ah why did you give baba food??
Patient relative: so he can have strength for the surgery. 🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️
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Atorvastatin
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@winniewheeny
Lucky you, my own paternal uncle was fighting for my bride price items, when he has not paid his own wife's bride price
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I was clerking a patient with the Dad, another Doctor was in the consultant room, minding her business, when the relative says " Doctor, my coke is about to finish" the Dr and I look at each other baffled, he takes 500 naira from his pocket hands it to her to buy him coke
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@__Folarin__
After doing 100% of the house work, only to find out the man claiming protector is a coward
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One of the craziest thing I've seen in Psychiatric Emergency was a totally blind man having visual hallucinations. Can't see light in front of him, but sees witches flying above him.
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I had the privilege of taking care of her when I was a HO. Such a beautiful and happy person. Her Mom forgave me when I spilled a vial of medication that cost 5k, she refused to let me replace it, said mistakes happens. Rest in Peace Folashade, I'm glad you are no longer in pain
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Why Nigerian Doctors will always be on another level. We would always examine the patient and note all the obturator, pointing, psoas, Rovsing signs plus the medical history of the patient, which kin MRI.... Using sledge hammer to kill ant....
Here’s a fun related story.
I went to the ER with severe stomach pain a few years ago. I googled and one of the most likely explanations is appendicitis.
They do MRI. No appendicitis. I say “Isn’t appendicitis bacterial? And therefore subject to exponential growth rates? So it
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@empressbenita
Those surprising moments when Parents suddenly stop pressuring and start reassuring
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There is A female general surgeon, Dr Ugwi, She is beautiful, tall, elegant and an amazing surgeon. I saw her operate once, her dexterity eh, she was calm, collected and the finishing, the suturing was clean and so neat. She is the reason I want to do surgery.
Women Underrepresentation in Surgery Specialities.
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I hate hate that word submission. You have to be submissive to your husband, like yuck, hate it.
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Removed the sutures. He left my gapping incisions open and walked out on me, said I wasn't cooperative and I was fighting him.
If this Doctor could do this to another doctor, I wonder what he does to other women.
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@thisibi
Like he was caught raping a guy and you are saying upon all the female ynash, he should have been raping a female ??
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We had an anesthesiology class then , it was so boring, like 98% of the class were asleep. The lecturer didn't mind at all he continued teaching till like only 3 out of the whole class was awake. After teaching he said he understood after all his job was to put people to sleep.
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@Princeikembajr
@instablog9ja
This is a wrong take sha, I've seen ladies that saw how terrible their mom treated their father and have sworn they will never do the same to their husbands and in fact it helps them be better wives. You judge them by their actual character and not their family dynamic
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Independence, for women to have goals, careers and ambition and not be limited by their gender. I advocate for women to have autonomy to make decisions for her health and have reproductive rights. If you can't understand this is what feminism is, you are an olodo
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First DRE I saw, SR told the 600L to wear gloves, we 400L thought he meant us too, so like 6 of us wore glove. The patient wan faint, SR was wondering why patient was suddenly anxious, until he turned and saw all of us gloved. We wasted gloves that day sha
Did my first DRE today in the urology clinic. Little things matter, they say? 😁🤗
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I was supervising med students to clerk patients. Asked what the PR was for the patient and he said 36bpm. I checked & got 100bpm. I told him he was wrong & he was arguing with me that that's what he got. I asked him to check my pulse and he palpating my palmaris Longus tendon.
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@Chukwuma_00
Please let the relatives inform them by themselves, It's tiring. You have other patients to seeing and you spending time taking on phone with relatives and defending your line of care, I don't appreciate it
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MO is working for you, the work is draining, you pay them 250k. They ask for an increase but you decline, one leaves and then you immediately run ad for his replacement and offer to pay 300k.
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A father's jaw fell open when his daughter admitted to dropping out of school 13 years ago, because voices in her head told her to. He said he thought she was just being stubborn. If you don't recognize schizophrenia early, it will steal time from you.
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He was obsessed that I was a medical student, I will try to talk about other topics, he will not care for it, is medical school hard, how many hours do you read, you must be very intelligent, recycled those questions for over 45 mins. I've never been so bored in my life
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Matriculation 11 years ago. The height difference was so marked, I had to stand on the 3rd step to be the same height with them 😄😄😄😄😄
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Ah medical school lol. I remember one Prof poured one stuff for us, Sr was like "Chief very correct" later the SR called us and said "if Prof asks you,tell him this answer, if another person asks you, don't say this answer oh, or they will fail you"
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I never forget the medical student that made serious stfu money from "Bitcoin" and dropped out of medical school.... I wonder how he is doing now....
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I've been on too much social media recently
Consultant: is it the olanzapine or the benhexol that's resolving this patient, Parkinsonism
Me: Na collaboo
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She vehemently refused and left. The man starts throwing a tantrum, how he is old enough to be her father and she was rude. I asked him how he would feel, if I came to his law firm and ordered his Lawyer to go and buy coke for me. If she was male he would have not tried that.
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At my place of work, my bag containing my laptop, powerbank and 32GB flash was stolen from my car. Two CCTV cameras were facing the car but they had been turned off during renovations. Nigeria has officially tire me. Laptop I just got and have never used.
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@naomeee_O
I've seen like 2 with severe intellectual disability that the relative want to get women that will get pregnant for them.... So their name no go loss
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@Tspiceskitchen
Don't ever wear anything more than once, immediately you wear it, pull it and wash it, best way to not smell, putting expensive perfume on sweaty smelly clothes won't make it better
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@tee_chukwuemeka
And yet it's female underaged orphans they want to marry off. People are offering to empower them and religious leaders are protesting so they can have their pick.
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A student once collapsed during resit when he saw he was meeting the same malignant lecturer, he met in main exam.... You need to see the lecturer peacocking, A student fainted at the sight of me.
Medical school is no fairytale. Sometimes you pray against meeting a certain lecturer in you clinical exams but unfortunately for you, you get drafted to meet that lecturer. The Lecturer then goes ahead to prove why everybody prays against meeting him.
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@DrJohnBishop
So you are saying, I'm intentionally stressing myself ???? Please it's the person that wears the shoes that knows were it hurts, don't make assumptions about my case because of your wife, we dont have the same circumstances.
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and begged him to start treatment. He refused and said they should discharge him, they counselled and counselled he refused to listen. They discharged him and he came 1 year later with advanced Bone cancer begging the Doctors to do something to save his life.
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A reg was counseling a husband about contraception esp BTL since they were no longer having kids. Man reasoned for a moment and said his wife don too try, he will go for vasectomy. Reg shock told SR & consultant both shock too. First time they've heard a man opt for it.
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Don't depend on textbooks. Jack your materials and make photocopies of the class stenographer's notes. You fit see stuff for textbook but if you mark am for exam, you will fail.
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@oliveKubmite
I saw this a lot of but it usually small unknown churches, you hardly see big churches doing it
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After your call, you should try to leave the call room in a decent state. Make the bed, throw your trash away. Make the room presentable for the person coming to take over from you
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That's how I almost put a dead patient on bed. Relatives told me, he was just sleeping, mumu me believed. Thank God for the orderlies, who noticed while trying to lift him. Now ehn, I scrutinize well oh, in fact you must walk sef. Next thing they will say you killed the patient.
The nurse was about to give an immunization to a baby that was brought in dead
You won't understand her joy if you're not a medical personnel
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300L MB tested a lot of people oh. That first trial by fire. You went from being a don in physics and Chemistry, to learning origin & insertion, decussations, kreb cycle, DNA and RNA, physiology.4 big textbooks for anatomy alone. How will someone not be depressed.
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I knew psychiatry was not for me, the day a patient ( positive for HBV, HIV) spat in my face..... I used bleach as facial cleanser that day....
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@Gidotti__
All these self diagnosed OCD..... Everyone now has depression, anxiety and PTSD 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 all self diagnosed
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@yourbluedoctor
I won't do that..... I would rather talk to my relatives, tell them the questions to ask and what they should suggest. My relatives should be able to talk for themselves
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Night class is not for everybody, if you go to night class and sleep from when your butt hits the seat till the next morning, please sleep in your room and stop suffering yourself. Try reading during the day.
Hippocratic Siblings, give an advice to a colleague in the year below you. You have walked a path that they are yet to step on. Let them stand on the shoulders of giants.
Consultant, advise Senior Registrar.
Senior Registrar, advise Registrar.
Registrar, advise Corp Doctor.
Corp
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A lot of Men drink alcohol, smoke, they hardly prioritize their health until they have a stroke or other complications unlike women, you are 65 years with uncontrolled high BP and DM and you are drinking manpower to straff 20 year old olosho, how will you live long ??
Men are endangered species.
I have a brutal annual reminder of this when reviewing MT Scholarships application. The number of students who say they have lost their father is alarmingly high. It qualifies as an epidemic.
I’ve lost count of those I personally know who are below
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@Simply_Sayo
As if people suddenly wake up and decide they want to be attracted to the same sex....
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When I was a student, I was in clinic and the consultant practically ignored us, even when we tried to talk to him, take vitals of his patients, we were still ignored.. Time for our tutorials with a Prof, we took excuse, he told us point blank that we have to chose btw him and
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@Chrisblin
My uncle was in Ukraine and in a bunker while they were bombing. We were begging him to look for how to return. Oga no gree, said they are bombing there is still light and wifi, do we have light in Nigeria ? The way we all kept quiet
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There was 1 HO then, I don't know if it was on purpose but if you would give him an assignment, he will just fumble it, send him to lab to drop sample, he will sit in the lab to wait for result that will likely come in 6-12 hr. If they pair him with you during calls, you will cry
You’re the worst house officer I’ve ever worked with.
You seff, you’re the worst registrar I’ve ever worked with as well.
Shu
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