Tom🚘Parking
@INEEDAMEDlC
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Pinned Tweet
i’ve been struck multiple times in the head and chest and am not expected to survive
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@solastsummer2
@straight_nick_
the character is shrewd introvert trying to appeal to walt’s childish machismo. falling for that as a viewer is like a getting hypnotized by watching a magician character swing a pocketwatch on screen
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@BKWelles
He could be in the middle of having sex with her and still be like, I’m sure you’d like it better if it was CHAD
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@dklmarxist
gotta show my husband is obsessed with me but he has also has to look nonchalant and disaffected for his personal brand
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@flglmn
I don’t want to hear about the explicit aims of the protest or the students’ personal connection to it, I want to trick a 19 year old chemistry major into saying the wrong thing
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@3am_billy
@CosmonautMarcus
LMAOOOO remember when Jordan Poole saw the baddies sitting courtside and took a bite out them mfs 😭😭😭
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most twitter power users very subtly lack object permanence, in the sense that they see 3 news reports about a train crash and think 3 trains crashed this week, but they didn’t read any last year so 0 crashed last year etc
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@dklmarxist
I hope it’s just someone filming a couple and trolling bc I saw like 4 bodies in that video
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@BKWelles
the endless stream of celebrity commentary I do is political discourse. I haven’t finished a book since 7th grade
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every bell hooks passage:
1. Repeat some fascist social propaganda “everyone knows”
2. Give seductive “peek behind the curtain” of the “true” inner worlds of the subjects
3. Paraphrase some egoist humanism psychobabble to explain why 2 does 1
0 stars. JBP for tote bag americans
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@generalslug
Teenagers who think 2005 plaster designs should be preserved as historical landmarks would be thrilled to learn about The Midwest
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@dklmarxist
situationship twitter declaring what their hypothetical husbands and wives should do for them
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@BornShoto
@Coooooooopppp
@roscoeswetsuitx
@GoldenJans
Yeah there are about 8-12 dudes in the entire US with a 10 inch dick. This thread is hilarious if you know math
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@generalslug
this culture is so crazy because they will be like eep I almost told a stranger my name! as they post their first and last name, face, town, job, school, friends, family and hobbies on their internet vlog
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@premiles_
During my worst bouts of adhd induced psychosis, parlays were the only thing that got me out of bed in the morning
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@wyatt_privilege
tourism is a form of consumption and consuming things will never be a real hobby or personality trait
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@osamabishounen
@GarlicCorgi
These are the people who grow into, “I used to be a hardcore socialist, even more than you, back in the day!”
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@machinegrlkelly
@ULTIMATEWHYBOY
@haramcart
I got a plain white tshirt with GRETA GERWIG in arial in my cart already
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@frankivelli
@hunniii_hefner
@pedrot420
That’s a real woman ❤️ Now apologize for invading his privacy
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@JackPLamb
ah I almost triggered Barney with my meme but I got scared I would get in trouble
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@Carzonfye
In Jersey we say soda, but in Georgia we say Coke!
vs
In Jersey this bar kicks out people with the wrong pictures on their currency after midnight, but in Georgia ყველას მისასალმებელია!
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@LegoRacers2
We’ve reached this wobbly synthesis where people on the surface world should only interact like lawyers, unless they dip into the Sex Chamber, where they sound eachother with power drills
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@OkButStill
you don’t have to tho. like all the docs who are like ughhh I have to call the cops on this kid who wanted an abortion :/
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@dklmarxist
If you’re a mid millennial you can’t say “I like this song :)” you have to hop online and become herpes debord
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@dklmarxist
realizing I’ve let my real life by the wayside to entertain little computer pixies that wouldn’t notice if I died tomorrow
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@lodgepolepines
wait til they find out about the underground comedy club that has 4 shows before shutting down every other year
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@semtexfarmhand_
In Malaysia he’d have to work at a place called Easy Chicken and a 4 foot woman would slap him with a metal spoon
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@ByYourLogic
“Split tickets usually don’t happen!” Presidents usually don’t run for re election with a 30% approval rating
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@dklmarxist
1. I know exactly what her boyfriend looks like 2. I feel like if I had 48 hours in his shoes I could talk my way out of this idk
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@NeoWestchester
@GMomurder
@Etanarachel
@sahibeqiran
Which is why all the waffling about “the banality of evil” is so off. These people are exploiters, their wealth is soaked in blood, they know it, they revel in it, and they want more of it.
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@viper_strik
@AjalaNiBabaWa
@bklynb4by
Right, it’s sad that people are still acting like being physically attractive is a reward for being a good person
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@HarrisH30894075
@FuzzyMarth
I wanna see your face when the republicans vote for the republican
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@lmNOTcatholic
I’m sure the parents will be glad to learn that their smelly anime pedophile son has finally turned “being regular” into their next political obsession
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@dklmarxist
weird logic spiral where men who don’t have sex are automatically bad people so if I think you’re a bad man you must not have any sex
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@b1g_damage
@dklmarxist
The oldhead in question being Farrakhan is so funny to me. He cooked
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@LumaThe1andonly
@Sturgeons_Law
If you sexually attracted to drawn images of feet, you: have a foot fetish, podophilia
If you are sexually attracted to drawn images of children, you:
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@TheElk801
@lmNOTcatholic
The “analysis” being “who is that?” “where are they?” “wait what just happened??”
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@Man0nTheM00n_
@captnoknees
@_DSpank
@captnoknees
is likely a sex trafficker who wants to spread false information!
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@dklmarxist
Guh? A real live female whos based and blackpilled on modern soyciety? I’ll be in my bunk >.<
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@lunch_enjoyer
dear fine applebees employees, I have a sensitivity to high fructose corn syrup. please sub for honey, agave, monkfruit, or hand-drawn honeysuckle nectar thank you 👍
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@SOPROSOCIAL
What the fuck is taxes? Where is all this money going?
Taxes allow the government to pay for goods and services.
I see,
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@cavban1
@CentroLeaks
They're not banned from competitive they just are banned from competitive
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we’re already there - “the Black Power and Chicano movements destroyed their own selves through their patriarchal oppression and violent machismo” is already the party line in the academy
I can imagine a “mass rape by black men” line if black men stepped up to militantly protect their community. That shit would work. Feminist already planted that seed
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@ChrisHalicke
Kenny finds a note taped to the back of locker: “Here’s the 4 or so plays that actually work in this offense. Love, B.R.”
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