Cartoon Steve Bould 🇺🇦
@CartoonBouldy
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To address the rumours: this is NOT Sir Keir Starmer's burner account. (Typos itnentional)
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They've done the opposite of a seeded bracket for the Champions League.
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@Daily_Hotspur
@Aubameyang7
Maybe Aubameyang should have sworn on his daughter's life that Maitland-Niles' goal was his?
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@5_News
@mrdanwalker
Ben Elton is as unlikely a political commentator as bread is an unlikely a sandwich ingredient.
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"Alright, well aside from Ramsdale, Tomiyasu, Gabriel, Ben White, Partey, Zinchenko, Odegaard, Martinelli and Gabriel Jesus, what did Edu Gaspar ever do for us?"
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You have to hand it to Conceicao, if his intention was to completely overshadow two excellent coaching performances against one of the best club sides in the world and emphasise how much of a thin-skinned weiner he is, he's absolutely aced it.
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By the way I sorted the Mkhitaryan chant yesterday:
So here's to you Mkhitaryan,
Wenger loves you more than Mourinho,
Woah oh oh.
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@RyanGRAA
@GregoryEck
Ryan, if you don't understand the everyday resilience of a single mother, especially one who combines raising children on her own with caring for the sick, not to mention that she's doing that during the worst pandemic in a century, then the joke is entirely on you.
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Honestly, my thoughts are that people who try to take the joy out of football are a big problem.
Obviously a great moment for Hannibal Mejbri…
But what’s your thoughts on celebrating like this when 3-0 down at home?🤔
#MUFC
#ManchesterUnited
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@OfficialUoM
We're not commenting further, but here are two paragraphs of us saying it's all his fault.
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I don't know where this ends, but I know where it started.
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Never mind what possesses a person to exploit the horrendous situation at Tate Modern today, how could anyone possessing even basic intelligence read this without immediately seeing it for the toxic bilge it is?
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Özil's pass was great, still, but the picture that's been doing the rounds makes it look like he needed echolocation to spot Kolasinac. Not so much.
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The James elbow and the Guimaraes elbow
"Very similar", you see.
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@GaryLineker
any danger you might pick up on this tonight? Not as serious as Lacazette screaming I guess.
I thought Harry Kane was a clean player who plays the game by the book? Or that's what Spurs fans love saying when Kane commits a misdemeanour.
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@arseblog
He killed a break with an absolutely sumptuous trip yesterday. He's got an extremely Italian style: excellent on the ball, wins just about everything, a total git when required.
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@matthewteller
@trequartbeasta
Compare this to how they managed queues for vaccines. It's blindingly obvious that they're making this hard for people.
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Sunak making a transphobic joke with Brianna Ghey's mum in attendance, in the same week he bet a grand on deporting people to a dictatorship...
...when someone shows you who they are, believe them.
#PMQs
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The City fans who thought it was a disgrace for us to travel to a rival and play "like that" may want to consider that we had more shot attempts and shots on target than they mustered at the Emirates.
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I thought our Liverpool-esque return to the PL's elite tier was contingent on a Coutinho-esque sale. But, watching Sky interview Saka and Eddie at FT, it struck me that the Academy (and bright sparks who signed Martinelli) may have given us our own version of the same event.
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@Kike_Marin_
Am I misunderstanding? You're presenting three short videos of behaviour that's extremely standard, and far below what, for example, Sergio Ramos would do, and suggesting that's justification for monkey noises and hanging effigies? You have to me kidding.
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This is great. I hope Sky embrace this level of analysis from fans rather than just harvesting the clickbait that the usual empty vessels spew out.
Some
@clivepafc
thoughts on the City game from his appearance on
@wearetheoverlap
. Find the full video here:
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GK: Ramsdale, Turner, Hein
RB: Tomi, Cedric
LB: Zinny, Tierney
CB: Gabriel, White, Saliba, Holding
CM: Partey, Xhaka, Elneny, Sambi
AM: Odegaard, ESR, Vieira
RW: Saka, Marquinhos, Nelson (🤪)
LW: Martinelli
CF: Jesus, Nketiah
21 players, 3 keepers. One fewer than Arteta wanted.
Arteta wants 22 playera and 3 keepers.
GK: Ramsdale, Turner, ?
RB: Tomi, ?,
LB: Tierney, Nuno
CB: Gabriel, White, Holding, ?
CM: Partey, Sambi, ?, ?
AM: Odegaard, ESR, ?
RW: Saka, ?
LW: Martinelli, ?
CF: ?, ?, ?
11 spaces TBD?
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This is the front page that should sink that disgraceful rag. I don't care how many coffees you buy in a day, just
#DontBuyTheSun
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@dhaybron1
@PrisonPlanet
@medicineranch
Unless you think >0 Clint Eastwoods per capita is a measure of prosperity your point is what?
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If Sky cared about editorial consistency, there's no way they'd put up with this. But the country's most powerful voice in football coverage (Sky, not Carragher) has no ambitions beyond doing what works on Twitter.
It was a penalty & the man of the match knows it!
Two blatant penalties for handball in the last two nights & VAR don’t get involved 🤷♂️
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I don't think Partey coming on with Holding was coincidental. I think Arteta prefers in midfield when we have to play a less athletic centre back. It'd be a kick in the nuts if injury disrupted the Gabriel-Kiwior-Jorginho triangle less than 90 minutes into its promising debut.
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Anyone ever done a tweet about, somehow, the joke always being on Tottenham?
Juventus given reprieve on 15-point penalty but Fabio Paratici's appeal against ban is rejected
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@Harry_Sherlock
@bglendenning
Barry, Harry's given you an commendably mature, level-headed response when he could quite easily have told you where to shove a tweet that was callous at its absolute best. Is there any danger you might show him some basic respect by thanking him?
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@sianabradley
@LucaHelvetica
They're doing this so the flagshaggers pile in on their side. Pure media strategy.
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This is the easiest thing in the world for the league to stamp out. The conflict of interest is undeniable.
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@TheOther19
@Stillmanator
@fergiesfromage
@TomCIarke
He said we had no plan 2 yrs ago. Then said finishing 5th last season had screwed us. Then said 4th was the ceiling for Arteta. Then said Utd would finish above us. But still, predicting the league's youngest side wouldn't beat City to the title? Check out the onions on Gary.
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@MailOnline
I honestly hope everyone involved with this story has resolved to quit and do something better with their lives, like work in an abattoir, or drug dealing.
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The UK has some of the most repressive libel laws in the world. The level of confidence needed to publish allegations like the Brand ones must be through the roof.
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Luiz motm I reckon. He's been excellent since Arteta arrived. Signing him was very good business.
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@realRick_E83
@andyrome64
@StuartJLingard
@BorisJohnson
If you can't read the opening of that article and see how your interpretation of what he said is wrong then you're not smart. Either that's misfortune, in which case you have my sympathy, or it's willful ignorance, in which case you really don't.
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@MundialMag
Mesut Özil silenced the entirety of Anfield (apart from the Arsenal fans who, not to put too fine a point on it, spontaneously jizzed) when he took down a rocket of a pass over his shoulder with his left pinky toe. Tasty cross too.
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You have to respect the people tweeting about the Carabao Cup. Makes you wonder what was on the other channel when they televised the moon landing.
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@MissLisaaJayne
@stereophonics
And we all know nothing stops contagion like being really glad you went to a gig.
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"Are you watching Arsenal" now the chants from Tottenham fans
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We're usually invested in academy players when they break through because of the hype the precedes them. But in Iwobi's case, we were all distracted by The Jeff, and he never built up that credit with the fans. It's a pity because the grief he gets is bullshit.
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Traore is a valuable lesson to any weirdos ready to give up on any of our kids. Only months ago he was a tragic case of a player whose natural talents only conspired to highlights his lack of end product. Wolves' perseverence is paying off.
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@JuneSim63
@jayrayner1
It's bad, bad, bad economics. You have to be a disaster capitalist to think ruining countless small businesses was a preferable course of action.
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If Khalid Masood was born Adrian Elms and radicalised in prison, govt's obscene neglect of prison service needs to be headline news.
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@Stillberto
@arseblog
@clivepafc
@carlbrwnn
@YankeeGunner
@PoznanInMyPants
People are too high on Spurs' ability on the counter. They see Son or Kane getting the ball in the opposition half like other teams getting in the box.
Meanwhile, by far the two biggest events for their xG were an unflagged offside and a pen from a Xhaka/Gabriel error.
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Cons: Saudi state investment commitments mean they already need oil to trade at $80+/barrel, so spending £200m pa on, for example, Ronaldo's atrophied legs means yet more lobbying, subterfuge, and general fuelling of environmental, human catastrophe.
Pros: sell 'em Pepe for £1m?
🚨The Saudi government has decided to inject $20 BILLION in order to develop the top Saudi clubs and thus give credibility to their league. They want to sign lots of "very big names". 💰🇸🇦
(Source:
@Romain_Molina
)
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@DanielJHannan
So you agree what was campaigned upon and what is being delivered are different?
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@AndyNaylorBHAFC
Come on man, there's a difference between "Caceido's not going anywhere" and claiming a £60m offer was somehow insulting.
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Wouldn't fancy your chances if you needed to borrow a comb off this lot.
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I can sympathise with Arteta here. He's gone more attacking but Saka, Partey and Luiz would all make for better ball progression.
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I have never seen a manager's interaction with a winning goalscorer be described as "gloating" before. It's TalkSport level trolling.
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🤔
Royal accounts have revealed the Queen overspent by £14.9million last year and the Palace had to dip into reserves.
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@andrew_lilico
Let me get this straight, when you break the law to, say, win a referendum, or travel to Durham during lockdown, that's ok. But tearing down a statue of a slaver is a step too far?
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"At
@UEFA
we support all forms of equality except those under specific threat."
Feeble.
UEFA has rejected Munich mayor's request for stadium exterior to be lit with rainbow colours: "UEFA, through its statutes, is a politically and religiously neutral organisation."
UEFA highlights "political context" aimed "at a decision taken by the Hungarian national parliament"
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Boehly desperately scouring Give Me Sport for a manager deal to hijack.
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From Frimpong to Fran Merida, JET to the Jeff, the Academy has produced so many players whose ability couldn't match our expectations. We're so proud of them we can't help getting giddy.
Which makes it all the sweeter that Nelson and Smith-Rowe are guaranteed to be world class.
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I think it was
@clivepafc
who said creativity wasn't the player on the ball but the movement around him. Doubt you'll find a better illustration than Elneny's role in the winner.
If Arteta's going to prioritise solidity generally, he needs to prioritise movement in attack.
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As treasurer and social secretary of the Nacho Monreal Fanclub, I will be issuing a statement shortly.
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@arseblog
@gunnerblog
For all the talk of adding Mudryk and/or Joao Felix, isn't our biggest weakness the step down from Partey to any other holding midfielder? Do you expect to see us address that this month?
#arsecastextra
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Here's the thing. Arsenal will generally be far better served by showing prospective recruits that the academy offers a pipeline to quality opportunities at a number of places than by shoehorning graduates into roles in the first team.
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@fivegrand1
@BrandyLJensen
And all the Yanks have decided the New Yorker has presented the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
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If Cedric continues his rate of goals per minutes for the duration of his contract, he will score 307,811 goals for the club.
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@Lord_Sugar
@GMB
Alan, we all know you're a landlord. Your self-interest isn't just showing, it's been painted bright yellow and now you're waving it around like a windmill.
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The Ian Wright Line: why TfL need look no further for train route’s new name | Barney Ronay
Preach.
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Flamengo player issue shirt (Romario) arrived yesterday from
@cultkits
. Was gonna keep it under wraps but, frankly, it might be too sexy for that.
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It's a pity it's
#WengerOut
signs that have gone global when
#KroenkeOut
would at least have caused the useless pricks some embarrassment.
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This, by the way, is bollocks. Football is the kind of sport where opportunities to bend the rules and gain an advantage are myriad, and it's the most scrutinised by far. It's basically no more or less moral than anything else.
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@Stillberto
Look at this response and Eddie Howe's yesterday. They're so frightened of being questioned: their only comeback is to disqualify the allegation. Makes me wonder how much more scrutiny is.actually needed to turn the tide on these clubs.
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@NatashaC
Wait, he missed out the dashes when reading out a URL??
If that's "spectacular", what's having ministers go on holiday and MPs defect to your rivals during an election campaign?
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@helloalegria
By my reckoning we're missing out on receptionists and 'those weird carpets' (??), oh, and commuting, which even these alarm-loving psychopaths know is awful.
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@Stillberto
My favourite thing is the faces Guardiola pulls when people choose not to pass to him in the box. The look of mystified disbelief is very funny.
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Sportswashing works in part because sports hacks are obsessed with access, and stars don't expect to have their moral limits exposed. When they are, their defensive, PR-sourced answers are very revealing. This should be Eddie Howe and every Newcastle player every week too, btw.
#Golf
's moral maze...
"If Vladimir Putin had a tournament would you play there?"
@IanJamesPoulter
- "I won't comment on speculation"
"Would you have played in Apartheid South Africa?"
@WestwoodLee
- "I can't answer a hypothetical question"
@NeilMcLeman
with the questions
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Is Leah Williamson the coolest player at the club?
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If Zidane has any sense he will retire to a life of dossing around the Med, media appearances and ultra-high-end luxury goods endorsements. He's had an all-time top 10 career. Unless he's going to win the World Cup with France, anything he does in football will seem parochial.
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The point of following football online for so many people is to enforce misery. Even at the expense of your own intellectual integrity. I bloody hate it.
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@WllStnr
@LGAmbrose
@JarnbjornHolder
Ridiculous thing being the commentators saying "you can see why Kane reacted".
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Arteta's early contract extension; thinning out the squad and focusing on 'culture'; not bringing spending forward from the summer: I'm not saying they're right or wrong, but they infer the club has a longer term plan that didn't hinge on Top 4. I still believe it can bear fruit.
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Don't think the Mail are going to feel too torn about chewing out last night's ref. A two-week old, hollow campaign to be nice to referees will be bulldozed by a decades-long commitment to criminalise being Eastern European.
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A list of people who can shove that result entirely up their arse.
1) Chelsea fans
2) Havertz haters
3) Neal Maupay
4) everyone who was fellating Brentford for playing a back 8
5) the Tories
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@Stillmanator
Been a bit of a running theme, hasn't it? Could've been Buendia and Vlahovic instead of Odegaard and Jesus.
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Arsenal had years to turn the ground into a place people want to spend time before and after the game. It was in their interest to do it for Christ's sake. Anyway, hopefully they're finally cottoning on.
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Auba was rightfully sent off. No complaints.
But I have a fuck tonne of complaints about the challenges that have gone in on Pepe and now Martinelli which were deemed acceptable basically because no one was injured.
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@christianwolmar
With a head that big I'm surprised you can get through the front door anyway.
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