Bro Thornton
@BroThornton
Followers
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Following
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Media
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#1 in the box (suction technique). Senior Vibes Analyst at Taint & Gooch LLP. Expert on Brazilian tang. Afrin Ambassador. 100% Parody - my real name is Clarence
Slam Jose
Joined September 2023
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Date night with someone I’ve already decided is the love of my life, she just doesn’t know it yet
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I’m about to remind every woman I come in contact with of the worst decisions they’ve ever made in their entire lives
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I made my girlfriend an Easter basket. I’m a fully whipped and cooked product. This is the end of the road for me fellas.
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Hey everyone, just wanted to let you know I’m on the verge of breaking 100K on the McDicks app. I have one week. Wish me luck
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Fuck
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I will not be stopped
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Brought my girlfriend
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RIGHT NOW
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Arizona embarrassing themselves in the tournament, cheers fellas
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I’m buying valentines gifts for a cat. Don’t let it get to this point fellas
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Me if having a 6-pack of Modelo on a Wednesday night was illegal
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BANG. Didn’t need the whole week. My doubters said I couldn’t hit the big hundo but dozens of double quarter pounders later here we are.
Hey everyone, just wanted to let you know I’m on the verge of breaking 100K on the McDicks app. I have one week. Wish me luck
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Just convinced her to watch me do an entire RDR2 play through. We’re so up fellas
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Yall mind if I stay home tonight and read about medieval Bohemian power struggles instead of going out?
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We fucking suck
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Yall joking about missionary but there is a 25% chance my nose will bleed on you and that’s the risk you’re gonna have to take
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What did buddy do wrong?
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If I don’t make a retarded amount off of sports gambling at least once in my life, what’s the point of living?
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Bad news I’m in love
New girl tonight. She’s classy so I will be sticking my fingers in wine this time around.
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@BurnerWjp
@drew_peacock91
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@RudyJUULianiV2
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@JakeVirtanen16
@MaaaltyWalty
absolutely incredible work fellas
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Doing hip abductor machine at the gym with a gay couple standing right by me. Had to open up the ESPN app to let them know I wasn’t one of them.
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If anyone is wondering what I’m doing from 6:30-8:00 pm tonight (the last 30 minutes is shitting)
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Not sure what I was trying to say here
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@cigarettesavior
I fear the day this happens to me. For now, strengthen your battalion and fight back with equal vigor.
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Not getting drunk tonight so instead the inside of my mouth will intimately be getting know the front end of my glock
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Thought I saw Fred Durst at the airport but it was just a divorced dad wearing a backwards Volcom hat
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Light work. It was always the tap in reveal
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Burnerverse seriously needs a pro bono burner lawyer for all the shit that is being said
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Getting pumped up to stroke it on the toilet while the shower runs
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