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Berto Hrndz

@toxicmonkeydude

Followers
158
Following
254
Media
185
Statuses
6,121

🖥 ⌨️🖱

Joined November 2011
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
10 months
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
8 months
@spaceashes he’s gonna miss it when he’s Womb 1 with no damage ups and 2 speed 🤦‍♂️🤷‍♂️
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
6 months
@SexbeanPernicus peggy hill…
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 months
@lily_lxndr and you know what? i fall for it every time.
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
10 months
@boygrrI i would have so many free beers and a few free drones by the end of the night
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
10 months
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
9 months
@burgerplugg get your test grade lower!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
8 months
@xanathgum no le hables así a mi perro
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 months
@badgraphix @CuthbertThunder free him 🤷‍♂️
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
that forehead vein only appears on lvl 50 racist white women
@5sweetharts_
Kit Hart, American Girl
1 year
Call me whatever you want. I’ll never stop fighting for the America my kids deserve. #iamMoms4Liberty
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
7 months
@zoomthagreat not me i start giggling and blushing and saying “realllyy?”
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
10 months
@GRUGCEL really yummy and you want more
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
Eating the last wing is really disheartening if you a real eater
@ucey_swave
Ucey Swave
2 years
Nigga on my 600lbs life said “ain’t nothing worst in life than coming to the end of a meal” LMFAOOOOOOOOO
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
Woah Dayton bronco
@LilNasX
☆ ‧dreamboy··‧̩̥˟͙冬˟͙‧̩̥l
5 years
🤠😈✨
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
@HannaBarberaCap Hanna-Barbera was actually two dudes and not one lady like I had imagined for the first 20 years of my life…
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
45 minutes homework to 2 hours gaming is the perfect ratio
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
I hacked this picture, only the boys can like it! No girls! Y’all can dm me to tell me how much you like it instead!!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
@uhparking @maklemons y’all some narcs
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Fuck toxic masculinity 😌
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
11 months
@MrZulubo @AntonHand this really annoyed me because gun game is so fun
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Tournament Organizers be like “Yeah we’re shooting to start at 7:30” okay but what time you gonna start shooting for some bitches?
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
6 months
@GRUGCEL gender studies have gone woke 🙄
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
Gah damn why is she thick asf
@MrMet
Mr. & Mrs. Met
3 years
Looking forward to watching more @Mets games with @mrsmet this year. 🧡💙
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Crazy how this happened after my mom and I voted, not saying it was us but y’know 😏
@Newsweek
Newsweek
4 years
Trump loses lead in Texas, where Democrats haven't won since 1976
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
Dudes take one good picture and use it everywhere 😂 #NewProfilePic
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Excited to see all the milky mommas getting posted today, someone is gonna be my stepson soon!!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
Why are they flying them on a plane? Just give them the address
@CokedUpHomer
Kamala Harris Best Prez 🥥🌴
3 years
no phones in sight just vibes
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
@postedinthecrib @CrypticNo We call those cum creatures bruhh
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
DAYTON LETS GOOOOOO
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
BORN 2 SHIT 💩 FORCED 2 WIPE 🧻
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
That’s cool but where does it rank on the list of schools with most hoes?? 🧐
@UHouston
University of Houston
4 years
University of Houston has been named amongst the best schools in the country in a number of categories according to the latest U.S. News & World Report rankings.
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
“Are you willing to condemn white supremacists and militia...?”
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Shut up man, they’re cheaper and taste same enough. I had enough of this slander, let me save like two bucks in peace damn
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
My sphere cost $2.4 billion. • 367 feet high • 517 feet wide • 18,001 seats • 164,001 speakers • 580,001 sq ft of LED panels And it’ll open in September with a U3 concert.
@JoePompliano
Joe Pompliano
1 year
The $2.3 billion MSG Sphere in Las Vegas is almost ready. • 366 feet high • 516 feet wide • 18,000 seats • 164,000 speakers • 580,000 sq ft of LED panels It is the world’s largest sphere and will officially open this September with a U2 concert.
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
But fr tho I got red as soon as I got in the sun #NewProfilePic
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
¡¿Pinche noticias, por qué me ponen on blast?!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
Hell nah Abbott going on a kill streak after the snow storm and lifting the mask mandate 💀
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
By the end of the year Federico and me are gonna have oven baked grilled cheeses perfected, we’re hard at work perfecting the science behind this culinary masterpiece
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Sorry I tweet so much, I’m unemployed.
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
Y’all laughing at the Simpsons, I’m laughing because you’re a simp, son!!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
@equine__dentist i have this facial cream, it’s like 3 years old and mostly full
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
Posting these bitches here too because I think they’re funny!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
9 months
@blephin_ does he get the lighter too?
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
the should make cigarettes that are healthy and smell good
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
What I’m doing vs what I should be doing 😴
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
just got a mid roll ad on porn, hell world fr
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
They got me for my catalytic converter
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
I be typing some fire on my essays, can’t believe I used to hate essays. Now I don’t have enough pages for all this HEAT I’m packing in my head. I’m going all fuckin Edgar Allen Poe on this hoe!!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
11 months
@UHouston My friend Lino is not a big fan of the U.S. Military! Not sure he will like this news…
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
“I remember in 2019 B.C. (Before Corona) my friends & I would have kick backs and we’d sit in tight circles eating sandwiches and I’d sit in the Carrels and get bullied by whoever was there” - Me to my kids through Zoom while we are social distancing in our seperate rooms in 2034
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
@UHouston My buddy Lino loves the shuttles, he’s excited to take them to sugar land campus every Tuesday and Thursday
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
9 months
@lgbtfortnite i tried building a shed for my crafting stuff and it was so hard, i’m just gonna stick to the prebuilt plans smh
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
11 months
@HuntShowdown can you add a legendary hunter with a mullet? i think that’d be cool
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
She gentrified my man’s drip 😢😢
@makjako
ko
4 years
she colonized guy
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
9 months
@TheObservant4 @willsgardevoir i always turn the volume down for this part bc i don’t want to hurt my truck’s feelings
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Don’t worry guys, I’ll handle it
@BlakeMathews08
Blake Mathews
4 years
Houston is in two separate cones at the same time. Never have I heard of such in my life. Continue to monitor and continue all tropical storm and hurricane preparedness/readiness. #Marco and now #Laura posing a threat. #KHOU11
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
@uhit Oh man my friend Lino will take full advantage of this! He has a computer and a laptop he can install Microsoft 365 on!!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 months
i like to eat junk food, drink beer, smoke cigarettes, watch tv and play video games
@jayson_smiley
Jayson✊🏿Smiley
5 months
Lenny Kravitz turns 60 in a couple months. What’s your excuse?
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
Bruh if I give you aux and play straight anime music I’m killing you
@reindeereks
derek 2 on the beach
3 years
who's getting the aux 😤
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
Her voice is so fucking funny it sounds like a girl that watches too much invader zim
@tanijrou
amber ♡
2 years
“My liege”,,, The dub of power is so fucking funny 😭
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
fuck she need mario for
@DiscussingFilm
DiscussingFilm
1 year
A new clip from ‘THE SUPER MARIO BROS MOVIE’ has been released.
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
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@Whataburger
Whataburger®
3 years
Guess who's back!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
i have a Saturday class :(
@UHouston
University of Houston
2 years
Have a good weekend, Coogs!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Eating a cosmic brownie at midnight... swag!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
i remember being in like 6th grade and seeing my crush like a dude’s selfie and being really sad about it 😭
@kiracantmizz
kira*
2 years
this feature on instagram was messy as heII
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
posole
@kirawontmiss
kira 👾
3 years
i’m still trying to figure out wtf Thanos was cooking
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
At dinner my little brother asked my sister and me what our body count was and we worried cuz he’s like 10. So we ask him what he means and he said how many friends we have 😐
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Man what Dayton High School do this time
@VaushV
Vaush 🌴 🥥
4 years
Abolish the DHS.
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
@neekolul You need a date to the Houston Rodeo?
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
My asshole hurts
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
This meal prep shit easy
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 months
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
I’m so handsome lol #NewProfilePic
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
You’re last executive should be to suck the skin off my wiener 💯 @realDonaldTrump
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
11 months
sorry women don’t want chiseled abs, they want fat fucks like me and my friends
Why do girls that look like this always have the highest standards?
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
I think I’m gonna watch every Adam Sandler movie and do a review of each one after watching them
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
I could still kick the gators ass
@GatorsDaily
Gators Daily 🐊
4 years
CRONCH
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Double Glizzy 😳
@JoeDator
Joe Dator
5 years
I can get a double cheeseburger so why can’t I get a double hotdog? I have developed a design for an extra wide bun that can accommodate two frankfurters at once. Higher meat to bread ratio, more surface area for mustard and relish. The world is ready. The time has come.
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
Pedestrian killer 3000
@jedweeks
Jed Weeks
2 years
Why would you do this to yourself
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
I want her
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
Those kids tried to high five me full force but couldn’t handle it when I gave them my 100% weak ass kids smh
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Where are the alternative, anime, art, indie, goth, semi-soft, bottom but sometimes top, bipoc, short, stacked, thick, doomer, gamer, cosplayer, OnlyFans havin (for PS5 & rent), ball flattenin, JoJo pose, New Jersey accent, dyed hair, bangs, and can do ahegao face, e-girls at? 😪
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
Who’s the third arm??? I am going to cryyyy 😞😞☹️☹️
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
1 year
@euIVmusic @elonmusk there are no bots, your beat is just dookie!!!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
4 years
She just asked if I had a Twitter let’s gooo!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
6 months
but my mom said i can have as many dr peppers if we’re grilling fajitas…
@nypost
New York Post
6 months
Just 2 cans of soda per week is too much — even if you exercise: study
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
3 years
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
8 months
@nudeobama my parents got home from mexico and we were eating dinner and my dad said “I’ve been sick for a week and i still can’t taste my food.” like cmon man you have COVID!!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
2 years
hope she sees this bro
@HoneydewWilkins
Honeydew Wilkins
2 years
The Queen lookin like a million bucks
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
Okay we need to cancel Imelda ASAP! This bitch got me stuck in my dorm and I only have enough bread for one sandwich!! I don’t wanna walk outside n get more!!!
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@toxicmonkeydude
Berto Hrndz
5 years
Started my B-day with a good piss 😎
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