raphael thumbi
@raphaelthumbi
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If unajua wewe ni squirter sema mapema
Sasa umeni acha nikilala kwa kiti🤦🏾
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@carltonkitheka1
Nikiwa BnD kuna wamama wali tumanisha glass za whiskey kwa meza yetu na hivo ndio nili end up in an apartment in Kilimani
I am not proud of myself
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Niggas learnt ''kivumishi kimilikishi'' just to go and become engineers
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What are you doing today to take care of your mental health?
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Called this chille to the crib aka ringa then I called her best friend totois akapanda nduthi - women are their own enemies
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Basteal
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Kalonje the last few days doing the Lord’s work
Calling out all slim thick and thick women 🗣
A thread to show us what you're working with ? 😛
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Do you guys know why matatus started being called javs?
Because when these matatu buses overload passengers some people have to stand holding the chuma in the middle like they're throwing a javelin.
Hence javing and javs 😂
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Nime ona reciept ya BnD jana karibu ni faint
Mkiona niko na debit card pekee please send me home
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Leo meeting na ma architects na interior designers kila mtu ako na iPad na Macbook pro saizo Hp yangu iko hapo inanguruma kama kisiagi
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Girlfriend's dad: What are your plans
with my daughter?
Me:
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John Cena
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Msi wahi pigwa pressure ku move out kama huja fukuzwa
Huku nje ni kivumbi
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Uki pea conductor note ya thao halafu a disappear kwa jam
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Hapa kuna buy back clause definitely
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Vile mimi hu track donda nikimpea thao
Rich people problems😂mimi nikipea conda thao itabidi nimkalie kwa mapaja the whole journey just to make sure hatoroki
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@carltonkitheka1
Niliingia cell bazenga wa inde akasema “kijana leo unapata mimba” nika jua hii zone sio sinema
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Mamorio kukam kupika kwako coz wanajua huja kula siku tatu>>>
Kukula sausage packet mzima kwa wenyewe when they're sleeping, I don't know what to say about that. But mimi kwangu nayo my pals know kujibonda ni free ingia kama ushaanza kula whatever, bro.
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@carltonkitheka1
@kingNyamu
@_G___N__
@PenielWeru
@waweruian9
@AdamNdegwa
@hakeem_mukwana
Natulengee Juu💪🏽
Couldn’t have gone anywhere else
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Me to my pals after telling them nimeacha pombe for the 600th time
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I think the first thing architects do when they wake up is think of ways to fuck up my day
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Church ni the biggest refurbishment centre ya madem
Huyo Church bro sasa anajipata ngori hayuko.
He's collateral damage 😂😂
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@carltonkitheka1
Morning commute kama mmebondeana huwa funny sana. Unafika ofisi ata umesahau vile ya kuwasha computer😂😂😂. Intern anakuuliza swali unafeel kumkula soki
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🥶🥶🥶 cold as ice
Never misses
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If we can vote for someone who shot someone in front of witnesses with no remorse, then we deserve all the pain we are experiencing
If you vote Sakaja instead of him in 2027, just know you're a failure.
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Mu pops used to work in Times Tower
Now I am building a tower that will trump it by over 5 floors
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Kenyan architects wanaona vitu ziko Dubai na China wana expect Raphael from Lang'ata ajenge the same
Sometimes let's be serious
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My nigga
@cm_wein
is winning and we love it!!
Moses Wetangula picks up nomination papers for the position of Speaker of the National Assembly.
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On call with architects from SA and US and wanataka I fly out we coordinate our designs na hawajui mandem amebaki na mia tu kwa mfuko🤦🏽
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Site meeting na Architects, Interior designers na landscapers na nime confirm Engineers pekee ndio tume sota
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Miguna Miguna saizi amebook Nairobi direct kama Easy Coach
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Uki kosana na your womans kuna ninja anam pea consolation with some side of d
T for Tuff
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Hizi ma airpods za Oraimo huji disconnect ukikuwa ofisi kila mtu anajua ulikuwa unaskiza múgithi
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Huyu ananishow niingie Sarit and order myself something nikimchill
Anadhani nime shinda jackpot ya Betika??
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Nime ambia F1 pendejos ukweli sasa wanataka kuni malisa😂😂
Hakuna difference ya watoto kucheza na toy cars and that "sport"
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Nairobi girls wako na a totally different understanding ya cheating 😂😂
I fear for y'all niggas
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Never knew that the best gift nita wahi pewa ita come in the form of a pdf sent to my Email
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People are engaging their minds in serious discussions and this is all you can add you dimwit 🤦♂️🤦♂️
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Ni kurudi Kanairo in a few
Nataka nikute nimeekewa Dallas gin kwa drip
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Architect anaamka amepigwa na baridi anachizi anasema tuongeze 8 floors kwa 17 storey building 🤦🏾
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Kalonje siku hizi kwa TL
True 😩
I've been searching for this whole year to no avail 😔
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Unafika site unakuta 5000 litre tank imeekelewa juu ya cantilever🤦🏽
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2023 has been a roller coaster ride for me to say the least
Some dubs but mostly Ls
Been at my lowest in life but also some great moments
Anyway, wacha niende reserve nikimbizane na ma bosco na bata
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Tuko LA kwangu btw
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Me: I'm a thug with maad street cred
Also me:
I can finally tie a ponytail but I'm not so sure I look good with it so I tie it when sleeping 😂😂
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Unhealthy things never spoil
Konyagi imekuwa kwa fridge since the blackout iko sawa but nyanya zote zime haribika
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Season 1 of The Office is the greatest thing to air on TV
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Ta ngui
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Heh!
Under 23 nili dhani naezana nao lakini nime tupa taulo🤦🏾
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If you go on a date with a girl and she does this, what will you do?😂😂😂
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Wearing 3D glasses over prescription glasses is the ghettoest shit ever
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Scientists 100 years from now will probably be scratching their heads studying what Calvin Harris was on when he produced Funk Wav Bounces Vol 1
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Nime ku letea all professionals na si ja include bei ya
@cm_wein
na bado una sema price is too much?
Please respek us Engineers
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The evolution of The Evolution
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My main nigga
@masilamd
ameniokoa so much kuna day alini tumia doh nikiwa line ya kfc nime peleka dem lunj na doh haitoshi
I wake up every day kuenda hustle ndio nim rudishie mkono siku moja
In a male circle, kunakuwanga na ule friend mnaombana dooh hadi hamjui hata nani anadai mwingine 😂😂
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Match ya Kenya commentator anafika pahali anaanza ku advertise 😂😂😂
Saizi ana advertise hospital fulani akiuza mashamba
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Mna pigwa soft na hard launches while mimi ni matusi tu na the person nilidhani atakuwa the mother to my kids🤦🏾
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Liverpool in 4
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I remember campus days tulikuwa tuna kunywa daily
Siku hizi hangie ni 3 days🤦🏽
Pombe ya Monday hapana. Yaani hangie ndio inaisha sasa?
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Bobby Mapesa's stima zimakekam is one of the best lyrical works ever made
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Ambition is priceless it’s something that’s in your veins
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Weka CV taratibu😂😂
Amerix would be so disappointed in me cause not only do I eat coochie, sometimes I eat it on the first link 😭😭
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Staying alive
What’s one item you didn’t realize was expensive until you became adult? 👀
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Heh! Mnatumiana bouquet of roses na hefty Mpesas Friday asubuhi? Hii uwanja ime tilt side moja🤦🏾
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Yaani another EPL season bila kununuliwa jersey 🤦🏽
At the moment nachukua ata ya Luton Town
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@cm_wein
Niliomba uharibikiwe hadi urudishe calc yangu plus 5 large in damages na inakaa the ancestors wametega sikio
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One of my hittas ana run parody but siko sure ni gani
But when I do nita expose that mofo
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Been given another chance in life
All I can do is give thanks🙏🏽
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Nashuku ni Thika Road based electrician
Somewhere at Moi University.
Jamaa alisema hawezi beba mwavuli.
Real men still exist
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When you find the dude that has been commenting '😍😍😍😍' under your girl's pics
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