Bernardo
@queefneyspearz
Followers
309
Following
1,179
Media
1,693
Statuses
24,407
Brazilian-Canadian progressive puta with a heart of bronze. Opinions my own unless they offend you, in which case they're your mother's.
Belo Horizonte/Toronto
Joined June 2021
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Find someone who looks at you like this tbh
This is Polo. He's so glad you made it home by snuggle time. Technically, snuggle time is all the time. But he would never start without you. 14/10
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@TroyMeaz
You went into someone's room and ate their post-going out food and you think YOU'RE the victim?
Sweetie, you're lucky you weren't repeatedly beaten with a sock full of frozen chicken tenders bc that's what you deserve
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@SomaKazima
Drew said it so earnestly too like baby girl get on zoloft and check ur house for lead piping 💀
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@_DrJeff
@eixopolitico
o primeiro ministro conservador da inglaterra acabou de dissolver o parlamento britânico pela mesma razão.
em governos parlamentaristas todos os lados fazem isso, talvez vc devesse ler sobre as coisas antes de falar merda
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@zachsilberberg
no but if this works out it'll definitely be more entertaining than Morbius ever was
more coconut trees, wheels on the bus, and unhinged cackling, less octagenarians having golf-related geriatric dick measuring contests
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Succession got me feeling so dead inside and I love it, how am I in a toxic relationship with fucking HBO
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@vitinhofccrf
@centralreality
Então Cristão e crianças não deveriam assistir, muito simples. Pula pra Record meu bem 🥰
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@whoreby_parker
*sips wine, cracks knuckles, starts typing* "depression session" and it's all Lana and Adele. Still got it.
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@Ramez05
@NicholasKalikow
@DiscussingFilm
They also get a nice lil write off. The problem is not so much that it's gross and greedy (though it is) but more so that it's legal (and now financially encouraged)
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@crisissercet
@staryu_eyed
@bonsbekah
...you're saying PRETTY LITTLE LIARS is better than Euphoria?!
Everyone's entitled to an opinion but wow I do not have the words
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@RossWBermanIV
Oh what, bc the Meg deserves to roam the seas in eternal solitude, never having experienced the comradery of shared homicide?
That's sharkphobic, Ross. Do better.
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@wayfaringwit
@VeryBadLlama
Yes, teenagers are infamous for not being super horny and having amazing self control...
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I know we all hate JKR now (with extremely good reason) but Percy Jackson is a charmless Harry Potter knockoff and I won't pretend otherwise just bc Rick Riordan is a good person
🚨 Official teaser trailer for Disney+’s Percy Jackson and the Olympians.
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@SomaKazima
I mean, I'll be a traitor to my people and help you abolish us cause this clip made my blood boil
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@ChaseMit
To be fair, Kevin HAS to have brought down the worth of that brownstone with all his thief-catching trap shenanigans
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@GuyCharmed
@jackremmington
That girl didn't invent German, or gloves, nor does she live in that store. She'll be fine.
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I thought I was a jaded bitch but that horrifying c-section scene in
#HouseoftheDragon
made me literally clutch my throat like a scandalized victorian lady
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@troubledwatersx
@gabrielhardman
You outta be canonized for "Idk about you miss kitty but I feel so much yummier" alone
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I promise y'all can still enjoy something even though a stranger on this hellsite does not. Try it, honestly
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@madisontayt_
Literally the whole world uses it except for y'all and Liberia so no if it helps it's not just europeans judging you, it's literally everyone else
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No bc the way Jean snapped
Jean says if you’re a jerk billionaire you should mind your own business and leave space alone. Space doesn’t need your bullshit
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@MeghanMcCain
Sweetie, you wrote a tell all about them AND an article bashing Whoopi. Not so respectfully:
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@SalibaBernard
@HuffPost
Or maybe the whole point of LGBT+ spaces is that anyone who just wants to have fun and feel safe is welcome? Gatekeeping isn't any less cute just because we're gay, man...
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@alexnpress
@CraigSJ
I will say it for the thousandth time: New Yorkers truly managed to find somebody who makes DeBlasio look downright angelic. What a feat.
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@troubledwatersx
@gabrielhardman
Also Selina hissing "you stupid CORNDOG" at herself is everything
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@blgtylr
i'm obsessed with how you always seem to stumble into the oddest, obscurest yet most iconic out-of-left-field pieces of media
pls never change
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@lastlineshow
@Ramez05
@NicholasKalikow
@DiscussingFilm
You mean the law isn't concerned with the petty livelihoods of artists?! Shocking.
(But glibness aside, I 100% agree)
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@crisissercet
@staryu_eyed
@bonsbekah
Ok and that's valid but nostalgia has a way of colouring things. Nothing made now will make us feel like we did in the 2000s bc we're not the age we were then.
But yeah, not even Sam Levinson can match the absolutely unhinged PLL writers room so good point
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@notcapnamerica
Listen, blue states have got to figure out some kinda funding to get people out of these places.
I get that Americans love staying and fighting, but life's way too short for that shit
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@NeutralMonster
@ComicGirlAshley
Q-Force was so bad. It was trying so hard to be gay ass Archer when Archer is already gay af but has much better writing.
I binged the whole season in one day and was just vaguely sad afterwards 😔
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@CartoonsBen
So it's not just Don Quixote you don't get, but also the concept of metaphors. Interesting.
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@ASliceofTrent
@DJDynamicNC
@JustinTrudeau
No, because it's a parliamentary democracy. We elect MPs and if a majority of them are Liberal, he becomes PM. A majority of them were, so he is.
Perhaps use google next time?
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@wonderbutch105
You need to not be exhausting and making a thousand assumptions about someone you don't even know, that's also an option
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@alplicable
We're truly a wild people, I'll never forget when some guy on Grindr took time out of his day for calling me a faggot (?) bc I looked obviously feminine (??)
Like sir you don't go to Michael's and then complain that they sell glitter
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@Carlos_Psita
@farriagui
O resto de vocês comem pra viver, a gente vive pra comer. É diferente
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@choquei
@arturenovato
A de Minas sim pois minimalista pós modernista simples mas elegante vanguardista 😌
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Not Jimbo systematically ripping Pangina to shreds over her outfits, her personality, and her entire existence WE LOVE TO SEE IT
#DragRaceUKvsTheWorld
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@milkyy_tweets
Honestly they kinda slayed, they're going to hell but they really lit each other's ass on fire
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@sierraornelas
You wrote the Max bear episode?! Oh my god, cyute. Sah cyute. (I miss Happy Endings so much, it being cancelled was truly the beginning of the fall of humanity)
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@SomaKazima
I feel like they both stared at each other for a hot minute gaging whether to be offended and then settled on "...fair enough"
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@centralreality
...todo mundo? Vocês tão querendo ser cancelados pela Itália inteira né central
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@manysoulss
@irrelevantmaya
Y'all need to calm down you had me worried Dylan was a bad person for a second there
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@assassinscreed
@_ACSisterhood_
You mean the ones y'all pretend are canonical even though you still give us the option to be men instead bc y'all are afraid of sexist incels? Or just the straight up unplayable ones?
Hm.
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@aguirreryan
@evanrosskatz
I feel like the issue here is Fire Island went straight to Hulu whereas Bros is going to cinemas? It's not that weird a distinction to make
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@SomaKazima
I mean she's STILL nothing and she had Britney as a sister, imagine if she hadn't 💀
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@thequeenpri
The way I had no idea she was white up until the Boyz controversy 💀 girlfriend is like a racial reversible jacket
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The QRTs to this simple request are fucking exhausting, and the reason why I can't stand comic book twitter
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@PinesSwaying
@PeonFlux
@elivalley
I'm sure Iraq cares, not to mention everyone else who died there because of lies. But sure, whatever 🙃
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@DaveScheidt
@SkyePatridge
And they're actually throwing a pity party for themselves about the backlash on their own timeline, it's bonkers
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@BlackLanterrn
i mean, if there's one thing gay men are good at it's fitting a lot in places where a lot should not fit
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@vinn_ayy
She got her sensible shoes on too, you know she's gonna somberly survey the shit out of all that rubble
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@cherry_lean
@Puff_Iya
You really shoulda taken a sabbatical after all the gunshots, sir. She murdered you good
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@JoyceCarolOates
That's fine, Joyce. Connor is used to not being loved, it's like a superpower
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She simply does not miss it's ridiculous
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This haunted sentient peanut has truly lost it, I'm almost sad for his unhinged genocidal ass
There’s no Christmas in Gaza!!!!!
Ho Ho Hamas 🎅🎅🏿
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@wonderbutch105
Stop reading his comics if that's how you feel then.
Or would that preclude you from what you actually want, which is to read them and then dogpile their writer in what I can only assume is a bitter way in which to take out a bevy of unrelated life frustrations?
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@AlexanderPayton
@keeganc15
I'm impressed with how quickly you got up on that high horse bc I really wouldn't have guessed you were so athletic
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@RossWBermanIV
i was gonna say, how dare he try to erase the electric, nigh erotic feeling i got when he slapped Chris?!
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