j🍉sh 📸
@punchhappiness
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photographer, urban planning student, socialist, spicy food evangelist. he/they. tmi sometimes. gay as hell. insta: punchyourwaytohappiness
naarm//melb
Joined August 2009
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Foreigners think we're all scared of spiders and snakes where the reality is we live in perpetual terror of this email
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so hypothetically if I took a photo and it wound up in the herald sun without my permission what can I do about this
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@NervousJungMan
omg this is one of those heritage places I'd written off as too hard to get to, thanks for the info about the open house
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I just had a customer pay with this, I'm probably gonna get told off for it but it was way too busy for me to argue
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me: nooo you can't just put every flavour in milk
australia: haha industrial blender go brrrr
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@AliceAvizandum
Once I reported someone writing "Die Islam" in wet cement and the first contractor the council sent out to buff it out gave up and just added a line so it said DIET SLAM
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This whole thing reminds me a lot of Hillsborough, I see we're up to this part
Chief of Police Troy Finner confirms that during the Astroworld Festival a member of security lost consciousness after feeling a prick in his neck.
He was revived with Narcan and medical staff who treated him noticed a mark that could have been from an injection.
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@anthoknees
Yep this is where I was when things were really bad here. I think I broke down when I was told I couldn't wear gloves to handle cash and the skin on my hands still hasn't recovered from how obsessively I was washing them basically any time I had to touch anything
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really cool that the alp is being just as sleazy to win Northcote as they were last time
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I'm looking up the Anning candidates in SA because I'm curious just how cooked they are and this is not a paragraph I was expecting to read
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@Milo_Edwards
A few years ago the gov brought in a rule that you could only charge what the credit card companies charge you as a surcharge, basically because Jetstar (Australian Ryanair) was charging $20 on $50 fares. And then this gave every cafe an idea to make four extra cents per coffee
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@theashrb
Sorry did that guy in the third pic pay forty one thousand dollars for something that looks like they found it at the bottom of a lake
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*whispers* body positivity and an individual wanting to lose weight//feeling proud that they've achieved a body they're more personally comfortable with aren't incompatible concepts
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say it with me! the only acceptable morality to hold around food is that everyone should have easy affordable access to it
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I've stopped at a random maccas somewhere in the outer eastern suburbs to pee and they have a separate room to hide the delivery drivers away 😬
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I hooked up with a guy tonight and the sex was incredible. Right up until he collected himself after finishing and just immediately said "ten points to Gryffindor" 😐
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@ByYourLogic
Australians are bred from birth to believe that every incoming flight and boat is riddled with scary diseases and that every tourist is maliciously carrying a plague of locusts, this is the one (1) time that border security brain maybe kinda sorta did something useful
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hey check it out it's
@Thundercat
! (I may or may not be missing womad and also a little bit in love with this camera lens)
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@disco_socialist
alien: features a scene in which a robot is explicitly told by higher ups that it's absolutely fine if all the workers die so long as the thing they can profit off of is ok
this guy: gee I sure would hate if there was social commentary happening!
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@ShadowTodd
Do you think it'll have a verse about the haters juxtaposed with a verse about dead cats
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@disco_socialist
most people who are hardcore into party politics would go along with literally anything their party supported so long as they could claim their team was winning
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also very very very very very rich of victorian labor to pull the accountability card ell oh ell
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@patbcaruana
incidentally if you're enjoying '80s prices check out this thing I found when I was helping my mum sort the stuff in her filing cabinet from this era
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Hey Twitter I'm feeling shitty about myself and could really do with some validation, here is a dumb selfie
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hi if you want in on my circle where I'll very occasionally be nsfw smash that mf like button
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@Gamecubix
They got it off Reddit - they had messaged me asking for permission but had already done this before I'd replied
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@AliceAvizandum
I had to do one of those when I saw John Mulaney and I think it might have had something to do with the bit where he explained at length how he did prescription fraud
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I haven't posted any photos in a while, let's fix that (Shinsekai, Osaka)
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I GOT AN APARTMENT IT ACTUALLY FUCKING HAPPENED AHHHHHHHGHGHG
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someone on growlr sent me this when I asked him if he had pics and...
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@jasebyjason
you reminded me of some extremely insufferably middle class guardian piece where someone was anti-bank holidays because she didn't like going to the seaside (?) and it's upsetting me that I can't find it
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tfw the hospital has a poster up encouraging you to do a thing that would absolutely put you back into hospital
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"back"
Homophobia is back – it’s no accident that nationalism is too | Zoe Williams
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local photographer is murdered by the giant koala at dadswells bridge, keno pencil on back of receipt, 2022
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@jrhennessy
English teachers love a text that just really smashes you over the head with themes
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hey british twitter, can I just confirm that "australian style points based immigration system" is a completely substance-less dogwhistle based off the assumption that we're all white?
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Well Labor is in government, Kate Bush is at the top of the charts and I've just been to see the new top gun at the cinema. I wonder what 1988 will bring!
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About 5 years ago I got a bit too close to a shark at the beach and hadn’t been further than ankle deep in water since. Anyway I just jumped off the second valley jetty and now I feel alive again
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@mathaiaus
I picked it up purely off of osmosis from my mum wanting someone to practice with and my Nanna being obsessed with inspector rex, anyway there was exactly one time in Germany I got more than three sentences in to a conversation without being forced back to english
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I love it when a 33 year old I met on Grindr in 2014 is suddenly 29 now
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@AliceAvizandum
@DrRhysPockett
Anyway it took 18 months for her to come back and me and the one other person who'd been around that long were just crying our eyes out the whole time. And now I'm thinking about all the other regulars I've had at different jobs. Knew nothing about them other than what they got.
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now watch closely everyone, as I make this excess hair... disappear 🧙♂️
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why did they build fed square when this proposal was right there
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@IllyBocean
a cool recent realisation of mine was that I still instinctively flinch whenever anyone looks at my phone because I got so used to the fact that anyone who touched it in high school would immediately find some way of being homophobic with it
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what if, and bear with me here, the government spent 90 billion dollars on something that might actually benefit people
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Gay culture is feeling the need to do a deep dive into the belief system of any straight person you meet just in case
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@disco_socialist
Can't think why people might not feel like voting between someone who actively promises to make things worse and someone who says they'll make things better but does nothing to stop them getting worse instead, truly a mystery
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anyway. my christmas present to this dumb website. hit like and I'll tell you what I like about you. if you're a mutual only pls
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hello I am for a brief moment alone on Christmas like for a compliment if you're a mutual xx
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(this isn't a dan andrews fall truther take, just a dan andrews is that little bit more authoritarian than I like my leaders to be especially when it comes to non-cooker legitimate scrutiny take)
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I just got in my car to hear Caleb Bond say "if I had to take a weekday off it would be Monday because I like to go to the auctions" ffs
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@AliceAvizandum
@DrRhysPockett
Ok now I'm reminded of when I worked fast food in high school - every Saturday morning without fail this incredibly sweet old lady would come in. One day she told us she was having surgery and wouldn't be in for a few weeks
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@ByYourLogic
basically the stuff from that one Simpsons episode with the bullfrogs is the most accurate summation of the national psyche ever put to film
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@thejimmalo
@amymcquire
The way ALP people act like certain seats are theirs by birthright is really quite something. Honestly don't see how someone who lives in a Labor v greens seat can see that behaviour and still vote for them
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A quick reminder to my UK friends that if you want the insulation in your home to work you should be treating the place like a cave, close all the doors and windows and blinds
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for those of you who can't comprehend the sheer nothing of importance is happening energy that permeates the city I live in
Adelaide Oval will change the size of their hot chip packaging for this weekend. It comes after several fans complained.
@10NewsFirstAdl
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