x
@nlurmston
Followers
660
Following
440
Media
726
Statuses
4,818
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
Van Van
• 432384 Tweets
#BETAwards
• 211288 Tweets
Ecuador
• 140813 Tweets
Demon Slayer
• 78935 Tweets
#HouseOfTheDragon
• 75552 Tweets
Jamaica
• 72144 Tweets
Conmebol
• 69838 Tweets
Clippers
• 58348 Tweets
#ForbiddenDoor
• 55435 Tweets
Cristina
• 54661 Tweets
Rhaenyra
• 52993 Tweets
CHANGO MAS FURIOSO
• 44915 Tweets
Chris Paul
• 39808 Tweets
Victoria Monet
• 30191 Tweets
Alicent
• 28971 Tweets
BAUTI NO SE VA
• 24938 Tweets
Tyla
• 23156 Tweets
Mariah
• 22211 Tweets
Taraji
• 20484 Tweets
Latto
• 19561 Tweets
Will Smith
• 18987 Tweets
#HOTD
• 16201 Tweets
Usher
• 15060 Tweets
Wemby
• 14687 Tweets
Simone Biles
• 13528 Tweets
Concacaf
• 12146 Tweets
Aemond
• 11879 Tweets
Eliana
• 10975 Tweets
Mechico
• 10239 Tweets
Baela
• 10152 Tweets
Cunt
88
721
22K
Mrs delivery driver hahahahha wow
18
795
10K
‘Can I have a short back and Peter Snakebite Wright please’ ‘say no more, don’t stop the partyyyyyy’
I just got my hair done for the protest at Columbia. What do you guys think?
4K
295
4K
97
364
9K
The fucking state hahahahahahahha thought it was the start of a new high school musical video
36
221
6K
Bet you wish it was some Colgate don’t you fella. Them pegs are as yellow as George Best.
PLAYER OF THE MONTH AWARD!
Thanks to all the fans who voted for me, the hard work continues!🙌🏽❤️
@ManUtd
2K
14K
219K
59
127
5K
73
277
4K
The worst season in our history? We literally had 8 players pass away in 1958 you ignorant knobhead
36
31
3K
13
78
3K
Despite losing the match, no player stared down more teenagers barely out of high school then Ben Chilwell.
Mr Intimidating 🔥🔥🔥
59
511
10K
11
81
3K
Hahhhahahahahhahhaha one kiss is all it takes
Mum: “What do you mean you’re going to seize my house if I don’t pay? This can’t be right, let me speak with my son…”
Me at Wembley on the 25th May watching Liverpool seal the treble with an FA cup for Jurgen Klopps last ever match in charge:
82
562
7K
3
67
2K
And there we have it folks… the worse present of the day goes to Dominique Ratican hahahahahhahahhaha waterproof and fannyproof by the looks of it 😭😭😭😭😭 they are poorly steppers them
12
67
2K
‘ALL THE LADS AND LASSES, WITH SMILES UPON THEIR FACES, WALKING DOWN THE WARWICK ROAD… TO SEE MATT BUSBYS ACES’
17
64
1K
She is fucking unbearable int she
25
18
1K
This is miles better to be fair 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
I don’t get how we can share a city with this lot and just be so, so different from them. Never in a million years would we have something like this at Old Trafford. What the fuck were they thinking about. The moving bus, the bin bags, everything about it is horrific 😂
146
100
2K
6
31
826
Aahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaahahahahahahahahahaha yooooo his mum fucking hates him 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
And there we have it folks… the worse present of the day goes to Dominique Ratican hahahahahhahahhaha waterproof and fannyproof by the looks of it 😭😭😭😭😭 they are poorly steppers them
12
67
2K
6
15
601
Just started singing ‘give it give it give it to ediiii cavani’ to some random fella in the bookies then realised it wasn’t you
@BashyMc1
4
5
470
Loved this app until the dirty French got involved. Deary me make it stop.
3
14
325
@tikataka0
You’ve got another male who doesn’t know you exist as your profile picture fella. I’d this this one out and get your hard drive hidden you sex case.
5
0
273
No John Stones. That’s what’s stopping it you fucking berk.
1
7
273
Gets better everytime 😭😭😭 gunna do a remake of it on the balcony in instanbul. Stay Tuned.
4
5
241
No Stephen, no he didn’t. He said ‘do you use Colgate dogshit and did your purchase your suit from Jacamo’
2
2
195
You’re country begs us for £3 a month to provide you water you dickhead
0
1
53
0
3
174
We had a chance to do this against them mongs and let pogba run the show. Bed.
Inter win their 6th Milan derby in a row to become champions of Italy! 🇮🇹
48
750
7K
5
6
158
Must be the hangover from the ‘were 3 points off man city’ trophy they lifted midweek 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
0
8
154
Fuck me how did you pick that one out?
1
0
138
As appose to a load of spastics thinking they’re on a day out at Barry Island 😭😭😭😭😭😭
5
3
108
Mendy when he got called to the dock
Footballer Benjamin Mendy said he slept with 10,000 women, court hears
2K
727
5K
0
2
105
Good grief.. think this tops the lot. Writing myself valentines cards like Jay Cartwright.
4
2
93
Me going for tops after 10 beers
0
0
82
Being called spoilt of a bunch of cunts who get games abandoned after a couple of loses. Mongs.
City fans booing at full time tonight 🤣🤣🤣🤣 spoilt bastards don’t know what footballs really like
108
45
3K
6
3
75
Like you faced them charges for battering your mrs you angin cockney cunt
Well done Man City. Roll on the day they finally have to face their charges.
881
203
4K
2
4
72
Hahahahahhahahahahhah
0
0
71
I don’t think it’s fully sunk in we play them rotten cunts in an actual cup
final this weekend
1
4
66
🚨🚨🚨 Pep Guardiola is set to LEAVE
#ManCity
at the end of next season despite the club wanting him to stay.
[
@Jack_Gaughan
]
12
6
283
1
2
67
These lot would blame a flat pint in the bishops blaze on the glazers.. poorly bunch.
This great football club is fucked!
Away fans in the home end.
Banners being torn down.
Stadium leaks all over the place & fucked lighting strips
The rot starts at the very top!
Things will never change until the Yank parasite bastards sell the club!
#GlazersOut
3
121
384
1
1
62
@BashyMc1
I don’t really know what to say but he’s finally finally fucking done it.. can only thank you for sticking by my through Spurmston, Spurmy, Spurmyyyy, Spurmmers.. todays the day.
4
1
57
BREAKING: Liverpool fans hit by Lime Street train cancellations
38
11
122
0
3
59
No normal city fan is saying this btw hahahaha every cunts heads falling off
Alot of City fans in MCR are talking loud, tellin me City guna give Utd a 1000 lashes. In what world! Utd wont allow that to happen in THIS final. Too much riding on it
Utd gotta go to war. City are an orchaestrated demon but I expect Utd to die out there b4 accepting a lashing
41
3
78
4
0
52
Off to watch the boys in blue hopefully lift the lot 🇹🇷🏆😎 what a time to be alive
0
0
50
🚨🟡⚫️ Jadon Sancho to Borussia Dortmund, here we go! Deal in place between Man United and BVB on loan, NO buy option.
Understand Sancho can travel later today for medical.
BVB will cover part of the salary plus loan fee. €4m package.
Boarding completed ✈️
@TurkishAirlines
3K
13K
144K
0
2
49
My pick
2
2
44
Scissor trim on castle st. Shame I always get the apprentice who gives me a short back and no beaver.
1
0
44
Get fucked you little grass
0
0
41
Right this guy was trying to give me grief the other day 😭😭😭😭😭 looks like Kurt Cobain after a stroke
1
0
43
You’ve got to respect the fella making it back on turf alive
You’ll not get that in Kabul 🍷
Wee half decker to heat you up ✌🏻
49
6
1K
2
0
43
Baffles me how anyone doesn’t think he’s our best ever.. KDB might go down as our best ever but for now he’s our best ever by a country.
3
1
41
Peppered what’s on Offerton.. someone announcing someone having a seizure like it’s a music event.
1
1
40
Not surprised it’s -2
1
0
39
Fly undone 😭😭😭 she’s deffo chewed him off for a ticket. Can’t knock the fella.
The power of social media.
This guy gave me his son’s ticket.
He saw my tweet and saved the day
My faith in humanity has been restored💙
2K
805
16K
1
4
40
Sat working from home and there’s a fucking bird flown into my house awwwww naaaaaa fuck it all off
2
0
40
Confirmed for the next series of ‘Celebs go raping’
Stephen Bear looks unrecognisable after being released from prison after serving half of his sentence
9
1
2
2
3
37
Well i certainly didn’t dream id be still wanking in the box room I’ll tell you that for free
6
0
34
Pep Guardiola says he has "a big idea" about his
#ManCity
starting line-ups to face Manchester United in the
#EmiratesFACup
final, and Inter in the
#UCLFinal
.
258
215
5K
3
0
35
Anyone know any tattoo removal numbers?
🇩🇪 Ilkay Gundogan 🤝
#MCFC
💰 £21,000,000
🔵 304 appearances
⚽️ 60 goals
🅰️ 40 assists
😲 Gundogan is RELEASED by Man City.
367
766
21K
1
0
33
Fucking freaks hahaha we’ve been more in 2 years than they have in 10
2
3
33
Why on earth do puma fuck all our kits up but these lot get these? Get fucked
🔥 𝗜𝘁'𝘀 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲...
Introducing the highly-anticipated new
#StockportCounty
kit range for 2023/24, delivering us into a bright and bold future.
All three kits will be on sale from 9am on Monday 10th July!
@ProjectSolarBE
|
@PioneerGroup_AV
|
@DeliveryApp_
|
@Beechwoodccc
88
83
449
6
2
33
Barely even fucking flinches yet I’ll jump out my skin when a instagram reel of a baseball flying at me comes up on my phone
0
0
31
Sadio Mane (31 yrs old) married his girlfriend Aisha Tamba (18 yrs old). They have been dating for 2 years.
979
741
6K
0
0
31
Love pep to bits but he needs to fucking reign it in slagging the fans the fucking weirdo
1
1
31
Hahahahahahahahah growler on show at a funeral wow you’d just end it all
2
4
31
Na that is fucking sublime
1
1
30
Louis Spence doing the calling in this match?
1
0
27
How did that one go you fucking whopper?
285
34
2K
1
1
26
Football heritage
One year ago today I got had off by Richard Arlison the coach driver who was meant to take me to Paris 🤣
60
378
9K
1
0
26
What on earth are you fucking doing?
Luckhurst trying to get into Carrington today for the ten Hag presser
1
1
35
1
0
25
GIZZA BLOWJOB, I GIVE YOU BLOWJOB. Book yourself a trim and have a wash.
1
1
24
And we’re the noncey neighbours. Disgusting football club,
3
1
23
Some old fella at the darts has been banging on about this collectors item a coin he’s been bidding for and
@AdamGeorgeh
has gone on and outbid the old cunt he’s gunna be livid when he looks at his phone 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
3
0
25
Sir Bobby Charlton CBE, 1937-2023.
Words will never be enough.
9K
61K
248K
2
0
24