Lovely, Charming Zelda
@lovelyzelda2
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40 year old fanfic writer Lovely Zelda on AO3: https://t.co/jrHN3ifXQ6
Joined April 2022
Too soon?
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AU where Stolas can’t marry Stella because he accidentally married Blitz by playing wedding.
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Stolas begins and ends the season waking up surrounded by stuffed animals before getting his new job
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Still convinced Blitz could’ve won this by asking, “What’s his name?”.
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The deviant manipulative mastermind and his traumatized victim
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The real victim here is Fizz who’s just going to innocently text to ask how it went.
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I fucking cannot w/the sex negativity of this fandom. Why are people just assuming Stolas is going to regret a cute boy smooching him? He’s single, ready to mingle, and has never gotten to have this before. Sometimes you just want a drunk makeout sesh
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“Bryce really fucked over the plot by being too adorable”.
"You did that for me Blitzy" 💙❤💙❤. Thank you Brandon for giving us the Owl Daddy we all love. #helluvaboss #HelluvaBossStolas
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Calling it now—Stolas crying at the end of Full Moon is in this sequence and it didn’t make the trailer because it was too big a spoiler
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Oh shit, Andrealphus now has access to the Dragondriller 5000 and the giant candle that smells like horny.
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Stolas: Oh my fucking fuck, the fuck was I thinking! I ruined my entire life and we’re not even dating.Blitz: *planned their entire wedding shortly after Stolas passed out on his couch*.
So what does it mean when you imagine this and you're not even dating yet
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It means so much to me that deep in his innermost heart Stolas refers to the love of his life, the man he’s willing to sacrifice everything for as “this idiot”
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Good news: Stolas is out of the hospital.Bad news: The hat survived.
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They only included this in the trailer because they can’t sell cute summer Stolitz merch if we all just lay down in traffic
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How the fuck is this the ship that’s ruining my life?.
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Ozzie regretting the brief moment when he thought Stolas might actually be cool
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This is the man Blitz Buckzo thinks is too good for him
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Am I right that Stolas is the only person we’ve ever seen Blitz apologize to?
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She was a punk, he did ballet.
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This is what has given me the brainrot more than anything else. Bc these idiots who cannot be trusted to text each other are specifically having the kind of sex that requires an incredible amount of communication.
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Still can’t believe that Stolas keeps his hands on Blitz’s face almost the entire time he lectures them for being stupid.
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Please tell me this is her pitch for the hotel. Please tell me the Princess of Hell has the same presentation skills as Blitz Buckzo
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I think my favorite “save this person from Viv” moment was when someone told Keith David he was too good for Hazbin and Keith David basically told them to go fuck themselves.
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I’m kind of appreciate that Ozzie’s was this huge disaster for Stolitz (and us), and this is what Fizz remembers: Stolas cozying up to Blitz. Fizz and Ozzie have no idea they threw a grenade into this transactional situationship.
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Ozzie: Ugh, you would not believe how boring Stolas is, Fizzy! I thought he’s finally done something interesting, but he’s just such a nerd.Fizz: Uh huh
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Because you’re thoughtless and cruel and you’ll end up alone
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I just cannot stop thinking about the fact that Blitz is angry and upset and convinced he’s just a boytoy and he still gives the guy who’s hurt him a ride home even though that guy can fucking teleport.
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This is making me realize we need a demon summoning AU where Stolas is just his usual ridiculous self.
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is there anything more exciting than hearing an owl…. except for seeing an owl, of course.
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Still amazed that they’ve trained us so well that they play one note and we all just know it’s Stolas’ music.
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Blitz wants Loona to call him “Dad” and Stolas to call him “Blitzy” 💖
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I have fallen to the Stolas angst after valiantly resisting
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This is the guy Stolas is drunkenly sobbing over.
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The real tragedy of being a Stolitz shipper freaked out by “The Full Moon” is I don’t currently have the capacity to appreciate the fact that Fizz’s horrific backstory might be titled “Oops”.
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Um, excuse me, some of us are still writing fanfic to process our complicated feelings about the last episode.
Want a another gift before the holidays?? Because we have a finale coming at you all TOMORROW!! Merry SINSMAS 😈🎄.#HelluvaBoss #Helluvafinale ❤️
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The writing for Helluva Boss is not like fanfic bc if it was like fanfic, there would be way more onscreen Stolitz sex and Blitz would’ve shown up in Stolas’ hospital room at the end, possibly to propose (or Stolas would’ve died so we could see Blitz sobbing over his body).
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This is the face Stolas cries himself to sleep over.
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@lunarin64 People always mention the cigarette/joint even though he’s so much more annoyed/bothered by Stolas wanting the book back and calling him itty bitty
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Look, I’m just saying that if they upload the Stolitz duet to YouTube we’ll stop asking when the episode is bc we’ll be too busy watching that 10 times a day for the rest of the month….
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If you’re bothered by age gaps in Hellaverse ships, might I suggest Stolitz? They can’t communicate and have the combined emotional intelligence of an especially stupid brick, but they are roughly the same age!
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I’m struggling with how cute it is that they both posted this pic
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Just thinking about the fact that it’s canon that this is how Stolitz look when they realize that the other one needs help
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@nsfwebs Charlie: Thousands of human souls are being killed forever, and I have to find some way to stop it!. Fizz: Oh my Satan, I have got to win this clown beauty pageant.Blitz: Whatever keeps you from asking about my situationship, bestie.
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Ozzie: The fuck, Stolas, he runs an assassination business? He’s going to Earth to kill humans? That’s not very sexy!.Fizz: I mean, it’s kind of sexy.Stolas: Oh it’s *very* sexy.
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Oh god if Mastermind was written 3 years ago and they only recently finished writing the second half of season 3…
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Stolitz fandom giving up on an update
Stolitz fandom asking for an update.
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Stolas eagerly joining the Fuck Blitzo Tour and getting very excited about the Blitzo Sucks event before finding out what it actually means
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@NeyEclipse Stolas: …the 2nd M?.Blitz: Eh, close enough.Moxxie: What?.Blitz: Shut your piehole, Moxxie. Can you go w/o attention for 5 fucking minutes?.Moxxie: But—.
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@Heartfullkings “No way can he fuck this up with a giant horny candle and our largest, most terrifying vibrator”—Fizz, probably.
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TFW you can go to space, but you’re super stoked to get a balloon
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@AjAWriter Ozzie: Hey, birdy babe, how’d that whole “if you love someone then set them free” thing go? You feeling good after being open about your feelings?.Stolas:
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“I’m not here to service your perverted bird needs,” he says after putting on his special bodyguard suit instead of his regular shooting people clothes as part of a bullshit job for an invulnerable guy who likes dress up and being rescued.
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Everyone's so traumatized I don't think I've seen anyone comment on the fact that Striker calls Stolas "Feathers" (one of Blitz's common fanon nicknames for him).
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@kendrawcandraw Looks like a perfectly normal platonic best friends kiss of yesteryear to me.
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I think Stolas’ Loo Loo Land outfit is my favorite. His date outfit is the better look, but his theme park garb just screams “embarrassment to the Goetia family” and he’s so happy about it
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I was so distracted by the bulge pin that I’ve only now just noticed that of course they arranged them so it looks like Stolas is checking him out/Blitz is stripping for him
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@Flugublue Stolas sulking by turning his head away (while still sitting on Blitz’s lap) is my favorite. So dumb 😂
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Stolas was absolutely the kid who reminded the teacher they had homework, and this is why the rest of the Goetia hate his guts
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I feel like the artists of the fandom should be aware of this
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I was going to point out the Blitzy pumpkin but then I noticed the FUCKING SADDLE
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You think Blitz is annoyed with himself for being obsessed with such a nerd? He's dated pop stars, but he's crying himself to sleep over a guy who actually said "I shall handle him accordingly" and thought he was being so smooth.
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Normally I feel like we shouldn’t interact w/the haters but I kind of love that the response to “more demon Stolas, less Stolitz” has been “remember when they tongue kissed right after that? Here’s the gif of them kissing btw”
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Blitz trying to psych Stolas out by suggesting ludicrous kinky ideas, but Stolas just excitedly agrees to everything so now Blitz has a whole new thing to deal with
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I swear to god, if there’s no passionate Stolitz embrace at the end of this, I am going to write so much porn about it.
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I’m the fool who believes when you look in my eyes
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Helluva Boss fandom only has two moods: sad and horny
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They mocked his friends, made his transactional fuck buddy realize he sucks, forced him to realize that of course his transactional fuck buddy doesn’t care about him, and, worst of all, he almost fucked a Dennis
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I saw some people complaining that this guy showed up in “Seeing Stars” but I say he should be in every celebrity crowd scene.
I just love they reuse the exact same animation for this guy later on.
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Look, whether or not you're horny for Human Stolas, it is a great design simply for the fact that people figured out it was Human Stolas based on blink and you'll miss it footage from the trailer.
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Blitz grabbing his cape because he doesn’t think he deserves to actually touch Stolas.
No, I'm not crying. My whole f**king world is crying 😭.#HelluvaBoss #Mastermind #Blitzø #Stolas #Stolitz
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M&M and Loona having an increasingly heated argument about whether or not to call Stolas for help until Blitz just appears in the office, shouting “The chupra-kadupra’s back, bitch!”.
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Imagine having a custom designed diet prepared by your waiting staff and no one has ever told you about waterproof mascara
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Welcome back, Pilot Stolas, congrats on all the global warming
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Broke: the tragedy of Blitz growing old and dying while Stolas remains immortal .Woke: the comedy of old man Blitz interviewing Goetia bc he needs to find somebody who can adequately fuck Stolas’ brains out once he croaks.
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@Flugublue “When I See Him” reprise while Blitz happily gets ready and makes them breakfast and Stolas is just listlessly depressed the entire time.
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Stolas: Um…where are my sex presents?.Vassago: What?.S: My sex presents? When you come over you’re supposed to bring me all sorts of exciting new things for tonight.V: That’s not a thing.S: Of course it is. What kind of candle did you get me?.
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@SatorRotas That brief glimmer of hope that he was sneaking in to visit Stolas despite my previous certainty that there’d be no mention of the last episode 🥺.
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@TheSpaceHatter @Turkinwif I think it’s Ozzie’s flames on Stolas’ cloak (so now we have another kind of fire and he might be more worried about his outfit than himself).
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Hope everybody manifesting affectionate clingy Blitz is going to be ok if he avoids Stolas even harder now that he knows he can be hurt (I feel like it’s 50/50)
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Dennis is so perfectly designed. Like he's not an Imp Stolas, but he clearly resembles Stolas (especially if you're getting blackout drunk to try to pretend you're not in love with Stolas)
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Blitz: You want to watch us make out?.Stolas: I want to see him do the spinning plate thing again.Fizz: Ok this is either the tamest threeway I’ve ever been in or the weirdest.
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Expectation: Harriet, don’t get on that train! .Reality: Try not to inhale the water.
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Oh wow, look at all this Stolitz stuff for me to throw against the wall after the next episode
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@hausofriya Omg he told her he wanted to “make the most” of his paternity leave?! That would be actually caring for your newborn and/or doing things around the house! It’s not a vacation.
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when your kink is being a bit scared of the dude you want to fuck.
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