miguelgin baylor
@likekoolaid
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the years of forcing my friends to watch youtube skits is finally paying off
Your first look at Tires. Coming to Netflix on May 23
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showing this to my friends like "see i told you he was funny"
Comedian
#ShaneGillis
' controversial remarks are coming back to haunt him ahead of his
#SNL
appearance 😬 Listen to the resurfaced clip. All the details:
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bud light dwyer
After Shane Gillis was fired from SNL, he promised his audience that if he ever hosted, he would commit suicide during his monologue.
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you’re allowed to say chink again
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my statement on jonah hill is that he tried to out lady talk a girl and it triggered her slut defenses and now they’re locked in bitch judo
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why would rogan be taller than big bird?
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she’s a girl
Give me one good reason Caitlin Clark can’t compete in the NBA.
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someone in the racist live chat just said
@jonnydelco
looks like the live action cgi garfield
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me waking up every day to drink bud lights and masturbate
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can’t wait for the steveo press tour to end so i can go back to enjoying podcasts
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the problem is always fat bitches
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sitting my gf down to explain that with the proper combination of frigid temperatures, adrenaline, and adderall i could very realistically achieve bass pro shop levels of exposed teenis and that so far she’s only witnessed the wealthiest 1%
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i can’t believe this ended cumtown
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i got free tickets to go see luis j perform 15 minutes from my house tonight and i invited everyone i could think of and they all said no
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the cdc says alligators are ornery cause they got all them teeth but no toothbrush
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my friend James died in a car accident this weekend. one of the best dudes i met in comedy, first person to book me, he’s the reason dork court had a venue and a drink special at the bar. the show will be on temporary hiatus until i can talk about it without crying, be back soon
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breaking news
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smoked haters and ate them with dipping sauce
🇺🇸AMY SCHUMER SMOKES HATERS ABOUT HER FACE
“Thank you so much for everyone’s input about my face. I’ve enjoyed feedback and deliberation about my appearance, as all women do for almost 20 years. And you're right, it is puffier than normal right now. I have endometriosis, an
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just found out my friend from college stabbed his mom to death bc she was munchausening him
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nothing cooler than seeing the sickest dudes i know on top of the world
Tires, a new Netflix comedy series starring Shane Gillis, premieres May 23.
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ngl trying to keep up with these dudes even for a minute was like trainhopping a runaway freight but i truly can’t express how sick it was to have a chance to make the funniest people i know laugh. thanks again
@mikerainey82
@timbutterly
@_Shaner_Comedy_
@dadmeatcast
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asians aren’t the worst drivers black women are
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if you like any of my tweets from now on you’re admitting you’re gay
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trying to “the sky is so crazy rn” my way into some pussy wish me luck
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me:
my sleep paralysis demon:
Hi, we’re here to dump some change in your mom’s Coinstar.
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so excited to get my copy of
@mikerainey82
’s On Percs that I decided to make an asmr video showing the first sweet sniff of my custom slur. powerful stuff!
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today i’m 30 thank you for your patience and my apologies for the rest of it
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people keep asking how the dating scene is in nyc. here’s a text i just got from girl i met saturday
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girl i had a huge crush on in high school but haven’t spoken to in 10+ years followed me on ig today. then when i requested to follow her back she unfollowed me. what a saucy minx
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this is who they’re committed to lol
I’m sorry, but this is too funny not to immediately put on blast! Also, am I mistaken that this club is in Seattle’s historic “CHAZ” district?
(Kurt looks up toward heaven.)
THANK U GEORGE FLOYD! For the fun Im about to have with this on Twitter after I take a quick shit! BRB!
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yeah that tracks
Danny McBride doesn’t make me laugh. I apologize to all people who feel differently. I laughed at one thing on that one show once.
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wait i’m confused, it’s now transphobic to say that trans people commit suicide at a disproportionate rate? i thought that’s why we’re supposed to treat them like retarded children?
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clearly today is a tough day for many of you but all this rittenhouse news is just a reminder to me of my finest moment in the chat
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2021 year in review of important stuff you might have missed
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this was some of the most fun a fella could have
Tonight at midnight Toby McMullen and Miguel Silva join
@ZASpookshow
on
@zacspookshow
!
Watch live at and subscribe to the network to get the pre release right after it airs! Use code ZAC at signup for a 7 day FREE trial!
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a cute girl said she wanted to go to a comedy show with me so i took her to see adam friedland and then afterwards she didn’t give me pussy and that’s probably what i deserve
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until 5 minutes ago i legit thought this guy was matt rife
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let my man
@JoeWGorman
live
Me fucked up on 5x the normal dosage of Robitussin trying to find my bed to sweat this shit out
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my extended family found out i do comedy. i am in hell.
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skankfest is getting to a point where the only people i like are the retarded kratom addicts
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woah brother i wouldn’t call them zoo animals
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god fucking damnit
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idk what it is but i’m enchanted by this handsome farm lesbian
For those of you who think Emmanuel is going to peck me in the face
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had to wake up at 5am and drive 10 hours round trip but when your boys say they’re racing frogs you make time. shoutout big
@ChadsmadnesS
for getting us home safe
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i might get black out drunk and go to this
BREAKING: Former President Trump plans to rent out Madison Square Garden to hold a rally.
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in case twitter goes down please send me a picture of your breasts
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appreciate this waitress for serving me my 2 beers as if i was waiting for a date
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if you were ever a fat 12 year old, and kind of still are a fat 12 year old, this is for you
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i want to thank everybody for their well wishes, and just anyone who’s reached out and supported me through this harrowing time. after 5 months and four days of strife and turmoil, the whole team team here is incredibly excited to announce that i’m getting some pussy tonight
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what paying $39m for tobias harris does to a mf
@BenStiller
All your movies are extremely low effort copy and paste garbage. Oh no, everything goes wrong for the main character! Who could have seen that happening?? And “Focker” sounds like “fucker”! Who could have ever thought of that???
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got swindled into a starting role for a playoff rugby game. let’s beat someone’s ass today
@timbutterly
@DubzDanny
@dru_montana47
@Naim__Ali
💪🏼🫱🏼🫲🏻
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thank you community notes for being the girlfriend of the internet
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too excited to sleep. feels like the first day of school tm
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