eepy themcel agent
@hottrashbabe
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8,633
Following
3,368
Media
34,834
Statuses
100,867
nonbinary icon. I'm in your walls teaching the spiders to unionize. minors dni 🔞
behind you 🙂
Joined April 2020
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shrek 2 is trending which means I can remind people about the most tragic fate in film history
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Alien is a film about the dangers of being submissive and breedable
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can't believe they finally made a book about twitter
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@MopeyGay
genuinely just want to know what happened to the kids who worked on this show. were they executed? or were they allowed to live normal lives? we'll never know but at least they died for something truly great.
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@thefemiurge
she's going to go sell newspapers on the sidewalk and tell us to read all about it
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@LisseteDelRio
People who smoke cigarettes don't base their entire personality around the fact that they smoke cigarettes
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hoping that the downfall of rick and morty makes everyone flock to the only good adult cartoon
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watching possession (1981) on the fucked up looking slime tv
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@Chinchillazllla
@KimKardashian
ouija boards are like $20 at target and are STUNNINGLY less scary that this abomination
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@XEECEEVEVO
if my friend's dad started obsessing about spirals and seeing them in the kilns where he makes his clay pots then that's his business and I don't need to intervene
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@AgnesCallard
this is the ultimate metaphor for capitalism because they do all of the work and get none of the reward because someone decided to be evil
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@fiImgal
he's not even mad at her he's just frustrated that someone's recording them doing regular things 😭
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50 REST IN PEACE BOZOS, 50 NICKI MINAJ KILLED HIM POSTS, 50 VIDEOS OF KEITH DAVID SENDING HIM TO HELL, 50 PICTURES OF MASTER OOLONG SAYING IT'S HIS TIME, 50 SERIOUS THREADS ABOUT HOW CELEBRATING HIS DEATH IS BAD, AND 50 QUOTE TWEETS THAT SHOW WHO WROTE THOSE THREADS WORK AT LOCKH
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making an onlyfans but there's jumpscares in every video
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so far:
-took down minneapolis police website
-hacked chicago police frequency to only play polka music and fuck da police by nwa
-exposed hundreds of people in a giant sex trafficking ring
-revealed that the royal family had a part in princess diana's death
we STAN
#Anonymous
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bob from bob's burgers: I uh went to a no loads refused party
linda from bob's burgers: and wha what happened
bob: they uh refused my load
linda: they wha?
bob: they refused my load
linda: they did?
bob: uh yeah
linda: who could refuse my bobby's load??
bob: um, them?
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drake: lol your wifi sucks and your taste in women is-
kendrick: YOU HAVE GAMBLING PROBLEMS DRINKING PROBLEMS YOU'RE ADDICTED TO DRUGS YOUR PARENTS FUCKED UP RAISING YOU YOU'RE A PEDOPHILE AND YOU'D BE BETTER OFF DEAD
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we need a hooters but for hung guys who come and slam their mammoth cock on the table with a loud thud and then ask us what we'd like to drink
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@dantelfer
@BrandyLJensen
You open your door only to find a single shoe on your porch. You pick it up. You see a note that says "look up". You look up only to see another shoe flying at your face. You catch it. You hear a familiar voice saying "nice catch" and a rustling in the bushes. You smile faintly.
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*desperate for girl cock voice* neon genesis evangelion? never heard of it. why don't you explain literally every single thing about it to me haha
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YOU, TRANSGIRL, WHAT'S THE BEST PIC OF YOUR SOFT SUPPLE TUMMY AND/OR THIGHS
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@RaceplayShawty
this is a dark souls mini boss you don't need an ar-15 you need a blade forged from the tears of your barren mother
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@gazpachomachine
but why would you look like the way you died in heaven? WHY WOULD YOU LOOK LIKE THE WAY YOU DIED IN HEAVEN
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@PostinMonkey
@fingerbIaster
farting 97 times in two days is a light load for me. my ass is basically just scar tissue at this point.
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when a guy when a pretty
calls me the girl calls me
f slur the f slur
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I'd die before I ever admitted this. this is one you take to the grave.
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alex jones giving out the checks to the sandyhook victims
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incredibly funny that ant man 3 has a $250 million dollar budget and their MODOK looks insanely worse than mecha george lopez from sharkboy and lava girl
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@The_sigma_fem
me after digging through his trash to finish it bc I don't believe in wasting food
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wow this blew up, can I interest any of you in a purple plastic piece of shit vibrator that feels like an octopus is sucking your clit off
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@Java_jigga
I went down on a girl for an hour once and at some point I got into the headspace that this is my life now and all I will ever know is the taste of her and nothing else. a nightmare
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wow this is blowing up. might as well promote the new movie that I wrote and directed while nobody from any agency was pointing a gun at my head. just squashing any rumors that may or may not be true haha. anyway, watch this because the actual ape went wild and ate a crew member.
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"L + Ratio + You get no bitches"
"You get no bitches"
"Do you dream of getting bitches you get no bitches"
"You get no bitches"
"Why dont you say that 5 times fast you get no bitches"
"You get no bitches you get no bitches you get no bitches you get no bitches you get no bitches"
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when someone says "animation is cinema!!!!" they're always just trying to defend why they're 30 and still love the minions or toy story and not actual animated movies for adults
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watching the big space whale get his revenge by smashing those evil space australians into pancakes with his fins in avatar 2
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femboys will say "I'm not like pesky girls I'm okay with you objectifying meeee who wants to see me as a dehumanized sexual object🥺" and wonder why we don't associate with them
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nerds are a special kind of victim because they won the culture war and everything new now must be attached to an 80s IP and yet they still aren't satisfied
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I don't like how insanely easy it is to disarm me mid argument by grabbing my midsection and giving it a quick rub and a squeeze. anyway, if you do this to me earnestly, I'll have your puppies😖
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