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@halcyon_hazel

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Statuses
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jewish-american princess | spreadsheet wizard | priv @hgh_hazel

cleveland oh (aug '24-apr ‘25)
Joined July 2020
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
of note: i will always get coffee/food/drinks with a mutual if asked!
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
did the math wrong apparently i’ve been saving 40% of my income and not 25% lol
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
they’ve got stuff brewing in test kitchens y’all will never know about. went to the pepsico test kitchen once and holy shit (i cannot talk about it)
@soren_iverson
Soren Iverson
8 months
Taco Bell presented experiments from their test kitchen and one was Baja Blast… pie?
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
@randomstring729 yep i’m gonna keep doing it because apparently i can
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
y’all have to stop going to this bakery JESUS
@NewYorkStateAG
NY AG James
7 months
Masterpiece Cakeshop, a Colorado bakery, refused to make a customer a cake when they found out it was to celebrate her transition.   This bakery has discriminated against LGBTQ+ people before, and I'm urging the Colorado Supreme Court to stop this transphobic discrimination.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
10 months
@cheer_wine the uk is less diverse than anchorage alaska LMAO
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
ok yea this but unironically
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
sorry the ai image is making me laugh so hard. 1000 pit bulls on their way to find the nearest toddler.
@ajpReact
AnimalJusticeProject
9 months
💔 Today is a DARK day. The XL Bully ban is now in place in the United Kingdom. XL Bullys are being abandoned in the street, sent to Scotland and left on 'death row' in kill shelters, according to news reports and NGOs. 🐾 Hundreds of XL Bully dogs in shelters are set to be
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
is tinder this bad for men
@Coscorrodrift
coscorrodrift
1 year
bro swiped
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
you are lazy. That’s a real thing. You are oversupported, overstimulated tired, sad, dealing with two competing priorities & u are doing your worst, despite having everything going for you. You need less rest and less care. You are imperfect and need to try for once in your life
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
people talking about texas versus me being a fourth generation texan with family in rural areas:
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
every once in awhile i wake up incredibly mad that i still live in texas and this is one of those days
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
@degromdotcom gosh i wish i didn’t have a car payment lol
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
just found out starting salary for my field in the uk is 35£k—>36$k???? in the US 70$k is considered a bad salary and 80$k the average. what’s going on over there
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
a) one day SCOTUS will rule against you b) there’s gotta be another one c) this request was obv bait
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
i hate doctors and pharmacists that believe that their job is to gatekeep patients from medicine. most medicine should be OTC anyway.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
@jortscity oh jeez nightmare
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
@cheer_wine me when i antagonize a bakery so hard that scotus overturns protections
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
@FrootLoopsFacts this is pre-taxes unfortunately
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
@Ryan_Weller yes, but i am not talking about the median but rather the wage exclusive to my industry!
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
this is unironically how you get more people with eating disorders send tweet
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
@cheer_wine i’m sorry but this has to be bait right
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
“oooh im such a high decoupler” cmon man. some amount of pattern recognition is good! like yea sure 2% of people who say slurs don’t suck but that doesn’t mean you’re obligated to trudge through the other 98%. pick a better signal LMAO
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
10 months
@cheer_wine stop you’re giving me flashbacks to my u.k. engineer income post
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
this is exactly what i expected their userbase to be
@ManifoldMarkets
Manifold
11 months
Manifold has just launched a dating app! 🤯💖 The premise is simple: OkCupid meets prediction markets! Bet on who would date who for at least 6 months. It's crowdsourced matchmaking! 100+ profiles created in just a couple days. What are you waiting for? Get in there!
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
3 months
i have come to believe 90% of sadposting is bad for you. emotional exhibitionism. do it in limited quantities lest you select for sad thoughts in everyday life.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
6 months
who founded your church: catholic (elagabalus 220 AD) baptist (dr. ed young 1985 AD) pentecostal (satan 3500 BC) orthodox (vladimir putin 2014 AD) methodist (some weird hippy 1968 AD) hindu (jesus christ 33 AD)
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
blah blah yea there are instances where this isn’t true but for the majority of these cases,,,, lmao
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
imagine being 40 and acting like this. have some dignity.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
actually men shouldn’t vote or work because testosterone makes them irrational and increases asocial behavior
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@RokoMijic
Roko 🌊🧊🏙️
7 months
I actually have a take that is even more controversial than this. Not only is it the case that human societies would flourish and people would be happier if women aged 18-40 were banned from the full-time, paid workforce so they could raise children It is furthermore the case
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
not to be a hater but i think the people who watch mr beast may have attention issues. watched this for 30 seconds and it felt like cocomelon for teens
@MrBeast
MrBeast
8 months
Train Vs Giant Pit! Curious to see if we can replicate the results we got on our last video!
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
*with absolutely no idea about foreign policy* yea i support from the river to the sea for ukraine
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
@twinkhoncreole huh yea when i had men enabled i got 100 likes in one day in rural iowa & i had made it very obvious that i was trans on my profile.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
oh thanks google
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
@StacyCaySlays keeping that in mind!
@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
@twinkhoncreole huh yea when i had men enabled i got 100 likes in one day in rural iowa & i had made it very obvious that i was trans on my profile.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
girl i matched with on tinder said “it’s so joever” and is currently talking about soviet urban planning. she’s definitely on twitter isn’t she.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
"my transitioning take is-" stop. none of this matters. half of you still boymode and half of you don't have jobs. what matters is the sun in your face, the wind in your hair, the existence that you chose. don't let your one wild life be taken by apathy and inaction.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
you are not a “puppy girl”. you are 27 and need to start contributing to your 401k. no more.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
he was so real for this
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
pharmacists and doctors are evil instance 100x
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
they gave tje penguin dysphoria :(
@Iinux
Linux
1 year
It’s automatic now. It has been for a long time. I look away. My reflection is my enemy, and the figure it shows only exists when I perceive it. The round black and white belly, unwieldy flippers, dumb yellow beak. I learned to be at peace. Ignore it. But reality drags me back.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
trying to explain to my brother that deflation should not happen and getting dogpiled
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
“I knew a trans woman who made zero effort to pass other than a she/her pin on her shirt. No HRT—“ you bolt awake in baltimore, md. you arent online. it is 1989. you are ray blanchard and you have changed your mind. the future must not come to pass. u must invent a new typology
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
@NicholasXVIX @FrootLoopsFacts unfortunately i know what i’m talking about and intentionally looked up pre-tax 🤙
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
my only contribution to the discussion of catcher in the rye
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
@Necoras @degromdotcom i want to build my savings a bit more first but that’s the plan! (it’s a 10$k used car at a terrible interest rate)
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
all three of my stepsiblings had kids in high school and 2/3 had their kids taken away it’s bleak out here. not to mention that the rural areas are filled with the most hitlerite beliefs.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
i think that chatgpt is both a cool tool and that the average student who uses it is absolutely cooked. if u use gpt in college it’s so over for you
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
@d_feldman they have to pay for student loans, transportation, and retirement as well (last one on a technicality due to their terrible system) also, i am not working in o&g ~ the american salaries listed were intentionally not from there lol
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
establishing a polycule as a delaware-based c corp and forcing leveraged buyouts of competing polycules in the area. it collapses due to immense amounts of credit card debt in the early 2030s.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
@cheer_wine eternal recurrence is more terrifying i think!
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
@telmudic thank you for providing a different answer lol
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
every once in awhile i wake up incredibly mad that i still live in texas and this is one of those days
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
2 months
who’s the target audience for candy bars. weird q i know but protein bars taste better and have comparable caloric content while also being lower in sugar?
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
@saulgoodwoman__ laziness doesn’t exist twitter, mental health twitter, etc. sorry you’re not grinding hard enough
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
@KiranPfitzner 15% of it yea
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
being low neuroticism rules have y’all tried this
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
9 months
if you ask “what about supply” i think we should increase supply too we r living in hazels imaginary dream world here
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
t minus five years until we enter what is known as the “korean polarization zone”
@StatisticUrban
Hunter📈🌈📊
5 months
In several major metro areas, including NYC, DC, and San Diego, the median young woman now out-earns the median young man, a substantial shift from the historical pattern.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
people who want you to decouple all beliefs want you to turn your brain off, actually. people aren’t sacrificing friendships because of ideology they just know the path that these actions lead down. anyway a better slur to say is —
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
10 months
nice argument! unfortunately i have kept my temper even though i’m wrong while you have gotten upset so that everyone thinks i’m right. try again next time loser
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
I'm sorry but this is amazing this is why you gotta show up every time
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
the bear in the woods thing is the most tedious argument ever. men r bringing logic into an emotional issue and also people tend to pattern match than do a frequency analysis . which is is more likely to have happened in a woman’s life? a) attacked by bear or b) attacked by man
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
21 days
weirdest gender divide at workplace is that only women consistently eat vegetables; men only seem to regularly if their wives prepare their food
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
6 months
@LinkofSunshine what the fuck
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
conservatives and liberals on academia:
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@ButNotTheCity
Florence Ashley
11 months
I firmly believe that one of the primary social functions of academia, especially in welcoming progressive researchers, is to contain people who might otherwise play critical roles in revolutionary movements.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
@typeofemale i agreee but bestie i’m gonna warn u that this thread is a hellhole and there’s a 5% chance u get 10k notifs
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
6 months
had a nightmare that i made a funny tweet and oomf replied with invitation to apply to join their polycule with a twenty-page polycule application and essay
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
aaaa i fucked up and did some coding for my job now my boss wants me to do more! i am not a programmer!!!
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
6 months
Rationalists really be like "You believe in making decisions based off of vibes and feeling emotions? That pales in comparison to my strategy, delegating all my decisions and social interactions to a cult of ‘winning’", and then never actually make good decisions or win.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
4 months
seriously wtf do you do after work lol
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
10 months
this is true: worked in a chemical factory over the summer; the % of women in the unit was “good” at ~10-20%. control room — mainly men — was like a locker room. one day they had thought the support staff went home & they instantly started complaining about the # women employed
@jortscity
Bubba (D)🧦🔰
10 months
@worsematt I know several "tough" working women who do well in blue-collar environments. I also know what men say about those women behind their backs. The women are not convincing those guys of anything political
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jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
thought about it and if i didn’t have to sleep i would consider not having an apartment given that most of the reason to have one is having a place to sleep
@snareflea
tetra
6 months
what pills would you take
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
actually yea i kinda don’t believe hobbies should be consumptive, they have to be productive in some form
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
why is insta giving me a side quest
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
>open reddit cs sub >every thread contains the most racist shit possible against indians what’s going on here man
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
the boyfriend is the one who walks on the street-side of the sidewalk, the girlfriend is the one who walks on the interior
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
me when i meet my mutuals
@luhaenten
𝓛𝓾𝓱𝓪𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓷
8 months
We could learn a lot about flirtation from Orwell
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
11 months
leftism is when u deny economics and the more u deny economics the more leftister you are
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
@sidhe_her “i turned off pattern recognition for my brain” why. why would you do that.
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
10 months
NOW i graduated
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
10 months
i’m the grand vizier of the royal family. everybody keeps asking me, “hey man can i fuck the concubines?” buddy they don’t even let me fuck the concubines
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
3 months
capitalism has been historically good for trans women; this is a bug, not a feature, and going out to bat for it is unnecessary!
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
6 months
adhd👏people👏dont👏have👏object👏permanence👏therefore👏👏they👏should👏be👏legally👏classified👏as👏incapable👏of👏living👏independently👏
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
car insurance went down because i am officially Transgender we’re so back
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
10 months
been spending more time around men slightly older than me do cis men experience a second puberty or something why are they all more man per man than the men in college
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️��🔥
8 months
woman im seeing called me her little victorian child i see why
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
8 months
people hate it when i am holding a can of coke and my phone in separate hands and when asked to pick up a third object, place the entire can in my mouth instead of putting my phone away
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
oh no is this a bad question somehow i love hearing what people were up to!!!
@gnosisle
Niko 🧉
7 months
“Did you do anything fun last weekend?”
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
7 months
losing weight: cons: -hungry -pain in the ass -can’t eat chuys -chest larger in proportion to frame -look even more like a femcel pros: -?? -blood sugar
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
gm oomfies do y’all know if any good books regarding the history of this region? also books regarding the history of eastern russia but that’s a reach lol. most books about these areas are very west-russia/ussr focused
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
10 months
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
2 months
she was right
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
2 months
follow-up: children don’t have disposable income? and who’s parents r buying them candy??
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
5 months
*posts the coolest machine ever *
@SenFettermanPA
Senator John Fetterman
5 months
btw, this is the thing that makes lab meat
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@halcyon_hazel
jenny ❤️‍🔥
1 year
@tunient i’ve matched with 30(?) people off tinder annd gone on three dates
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