champagne who?
@familigurll
Followers
336
Following
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6,272
You can kidnap me with nge'ge or nyamachoma
Joined January 2022
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Uliza kesho bado tumejam juu ya finance bill
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Smokies should be banned! That whole smocha thing should be declared ILLEGAL
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Remember kids, msherati ni Msherati tuu with or without summertides😂😂
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"Throats are very open " na chrome gin.. Tukuwe serious kidogo
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@Kivutss
I remember one time my sister was house hunting then we saw a poster adversing 1 br units 😂 why did my she go " nataka houses bado sijafika kwa units mimi" 😭😭😂😂
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Nyasuba gitiende💋
I need a thread of Luo women bana. You ladies are so gorgeous 😍😍😍
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Hey horny people, in the midst of your horniness please don't forget to put
#RutoMustGo
after every horny tweet. Thanks
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@roywahome9
I'm sure you were also taught ukienda kwa wenyewe hukuli nikama you've never eaten before
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Sahii ningekuwa na bf ningekuwa nishamtumia pesa ya kesho lunch na ya kuenda kwa barber weekend 😂. But now all the money is mine. Being single isn't so bad after all
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Snitching on yourself and shit
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Juu ulikuwa unamuhurumia mwekee hio 2.5 ya juu
@featuringhndrx
What a joke
Ik a guy in the army went to war(in somalia) and got ptsd and he was comepensated 3.5M
This country no🤣
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@Degrata254
Pesa ya mzazi na sibling.. They made sure I never lacked. So grateful. Sikuwai sota in campus like at all
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@Kivutss
Lol na he keeps comparing his current relationship to the previous one much. Saying how he's happy sahii etc.. Nikama he's trying to convince everyone so bad
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I used to see this keg containers nadhani ni big gas cylinders and I would ask my mum mbona habuy izo and she'd fuel my stupidity by telling me hajapata pesa but akipata atanunua😭😭
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I had forgotten my original airpods kwa mat😂😂sijaifwata matatu mbio ivo aki🤣🤣🤣
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Nikipata mtu alianza trend ya kuweka garlic, hoho and dania kwa omena tunafight on sight!!
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Stop killing each other you guys, cause everytime it happens my dad gives me the same lecture over and over again
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I really need a bf anibuyie jersey ya Manchester ya AIG 😭. Then iandikwe jina yangu😭. God pls nipee a serious Manchester united fan
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@carltonkitheka1
I remember my dad was so worried my brother wanted to move out during corona period 😂. My brother insisted.. My dad sends me to my brother's house to see if his doing well ama 'anateseka' na hasemi.. My brothers are so blessed to have him fr
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Tumbo ikisema sausage ni sausage. Idc idc
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You guys, what should I do because the way my body itches after taking a bath? 😭😭 I literally spend more time scratching myself than getting ready 🤣😭. Ama watu wa ocha wanataka kuni maliza??
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Unasoma kweli, ama ni mambo ya ngono 24/7??
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Mnafungia your HUSBANDS gate midnight??
Saa hio mimi boyfriend akiweza Kuja hio masaa hata chakula I'm warming for him 😂😂😭.
The only thing nitasema ni 'hujui ni kubaya you are staying outside till late??'
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Ni mimi tuu sinanga shida w people texting me after 6 months? 😂 Juu I'll just reply and lie to you about everything you ask🤷🏾♀️
You've never texted me since last year alafu unanihit na "how are you doing"??????? I'm not doing ,wachana na mimi
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People take X so seriously 😭. Pls stop, it's just an app. Omgggg
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Hii tsavo nyi huongelelea hukuwa wapi btw? 😂 I think I'm the only one who's clueless about it
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Nyiri wanakula guac and fries then mimi niko hapa na nyoyo😭🤣🤣
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@X_Official__
Hyperpigmentation.. I have that too.. Some parts of the bodyb are lighter that others
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Ukizoea Twitter and it's realness people on ig start looking so dumb, it's crazyyy
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Btw if you regularly eat groundnuts you'll have a fire body.. Fr fr
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@s1ah_wanja
Hao Nigerians wanafaa kukuwa deported wote. If you like them so much you follow them huko
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Kwetu ovacado business hukuwa so serious, unafika unakatiwa piece uonjee kwanza 😂
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People who eat mchele matumbo is everything okay at home??
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Mimi one day naskianga nikama tumbo inajikunja😭😭
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Hadi Kerry akarudi kwa pombe?!!
Zakayo you will CRUMBLE!!
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My problem is I'll go to a club, get bored then want to go to the dj to request him/her to play ferre gola 😂😭
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Unaingia kwa nyumba kuchange Playlist kurudi nje unapata kuku zimepita na nyanya ulifaa kutumia kupika lunch 😭
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Mtu mliongea naye last December anakutext out of nowhere kukuuliza kaa you are aware yeye hukutaka😂😂😂
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Mai lawd kwa hio conference league the team I'm familiar w ni Chelsea tuu
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Asking me why I support Manchester united is crazy juu mimi I was born nikapata my brother ashaniingiza kwa team yake 😂 Na leaving the team imenishinda😭
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Kama ni wewe ndio umeambia my dad muendee quiver jua tuu he's a grandfather too😭
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Pls if I ever cook for you, don't come to the kitchen 'to help me cook' like that shit. Idc how inlove we are just stay away and wait for food
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@chebyszn
Same😭. Na I thought that fb meant you found the person from face book 😂😭. Yoooh ushamba no mbaya!!
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me and my 31year old😭😭>>>>
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Mzee mwingine hapo bs anauza zile dudu za mvua zenye waluyha waukula. Anazipima kaa njugu 😂😂😂
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Kama savings zinaweza malizwa na minute maid izo si savings mate
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Ivi ndio kukata thara huitwa siku izi?
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@bimb0egoddess
Lol. Watu ni wengi na the process is long, she'll definitely get to him. You just want to start some stupid shit
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Osama akipigiwa na ruto aelezee what's happening after him seeing how people have turned up huko uhuru park sijui huyo fundi atasema nini aki😂😂
#RutoMustGo
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Eating ovacado makes your boobies extremely extremely soft 😂🫵
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Nataka tuu bf mwenye weekends tutakuwa tunaenda kuwatch hockey games na yeye huko city park
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I'm telling my friend leo nataka kuona solar eclipse ananiuliza kama sisi Africans we'll be able to see it? 😂😂😭
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That in starehe boys you just sit how you want in class na the teacher atafunza tuu w/o any issue😭
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Trying to 'kuja tucheze ps ' me at this hour is crazy
Juu are you even thinking
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I closed my eyes alittle kwa mat na I opened them nimepatana na this man staring at me me 😂😭
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Guys my dad anasema Tuesday nisiendee shule, if I don't then hakuna maandamano for me😭😭. Amesema the government should release
@Dr_AustinOmondi
!!
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Niko so tempted but no 😂😂😭
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