steve buscemi’s anal bead
@catholic_victim
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Following
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Statuses
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Packers | Gophers | bridges cranes and tunnels | herpes/hernia survivor | Wolverhampton | Tegridy Farms | Coco Gauff Superfan | On the spectrum
Isle royale national park
Joined April 2020
These once great soldiers will be buying my chipotle today
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@CrimeWatchMpls Just imagining myself confused as fuck stepping over all them on my way to Panda Express.
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@tomizzogoat6969 Dude bought the worst seat in the house and is complaining about not being able to see shit😂.
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You look like that hot fish from shark tale.
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There are many people, places, and things that have let me down at some point in my 23 years of life. Lions Tap is not one of them
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Telling people I voted for whoever I think they wanna hear
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Since the boys are so banged up, I took it upon myself to be the next man up tonight. Yes I am at Sally’s alone. No I will not apologize for caring about our shitty basketball team
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Some sad news in the SBAB family today. My fish, Bronn of Blackstone, killed himself while I was at work today. No note, nothing. Gonna take some time to reflect on what I could’ve done better
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Being super gay with your friends is the straightest thing you can do.
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Something I shamelessly do a couple times a week is walk over to SLP Costco for the sole purpose of getting a slice and walking back home. Really gonna miss it in the winter
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My dream is to open a beer hall (think Ovella Negra in Barcelona). Location tbd. Beer towers. A lot of focus would go into finding the best beer snacks to have while drinking as well. Would have to find ways to deter the craft beer community because they would ruin the vibe.
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@creigtonsburner Your caption sucks and that range looks like dogshit but the food looks fire.
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Walking thru Minneapolis feels like I’m in Gotham tonight.
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I will be killing myself live on instagram in 10 minutes.
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@thefreebirdsolo Don’t even have to look at the replies to know a bunch sec burners are crying in them.
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I just had to share this cuz it’s the best birria I’ve ever had.📍la bodega taco bar, Uptown
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I started an investigation into this piss splotch on my bed. Main culprits are me myself and I. No eyewitnesses as of now but the girl that was here leaving suddenly at 6 am allows me to narrow it down to her or I. I’d lean me I think
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The angrier I get at work the more motivated I get to find a bad bitch to come home to. Obviously not motivated enough to actually go try and find one but I think we’re getting there.
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Tons of lesbians downtown. Gonna take a wild guess and say the lynx play tonight.
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Starting to get word from sources I was retarded last night. Shocking.
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Sitting alone at the kk eating $1 grilled cheeses and pounding personal pitchers watching my bets lose. I would say this is rock bottom but it’s the happiest I’ve been in a long time.
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There’s just gotta be a bad bitch out there for me.
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That was excruciating
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Everybody wish me luck on my date 🤞. Hope I don’t say anything too out of pocket and hope I don’t freeze up and get scared🤞big boy pants on.
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I’m getting a buzzcut if the twins win tomorrow.
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It’s baby Friday and we’re tapping in with mom. Let’s just say the left will not be ecstatic about this one
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R*dy G*berts personal assistant just tried to act like I should be in awe of him “idk if you follow the timberwolves but he’s Rudy gobert one of their best players” I chuckled a bit and replied “idk if you follow the burnerverse at all but I’m Steve buscemis anal bead”.
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How do I tell my parents I pissed the hotel bed our first night here.
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@GopherMBB It’s just so perfect. You don’t foul at the end of regulation when you should and then you commit the dumbest foul I’ve ever seen in overtime. All around brainless basketball team and it starts with the coach.
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Wearing Hey Dudes to the office should get you fired on the spot.
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At mystic in line to cash out and who do I see? Lu’cye and Femi sitting at slot machines. Can’t make this shit up. Unserious players and an unserious program til Ben is gone.
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People I hate:.-Pedestrians.-People who drink water out of blender bottles.-people who wear wife beater to the gym (they usually walk funny too).-people who park their car in random places and just throw their hazards on thinking that solves the problem.-anyone under 15.
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🚨BREAKING NEWS OUT OF DINKYTOWN: I just saw Darius Taylor walking and asked if he’s gonna play. He chuckled and said “yeah”. Big, big news ahead of Thursdays opener.
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If there are no Christian Braun haters left in the world, that means I am dead.
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I am officially announcing my interest in the soon to be vacant Minnesota men’s basketball head coaching position🏀.
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Some triple crane action to start our Wednesday. Not too shabby
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If ur into hot freshman sallys is buzzing rn.
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They said I couldn’t find bag in Dubuque Iowa. They were wrong.
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Broken heel, scary deathly hungover, visibly shaking at brunch with parents. This could very well be the worst day of my life. Ts and Ps appreciated.
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Waking up so chung on thanksgiving and having to watch Ben Johnson coach basketball might as well just end it all rn.
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Gophers win on a career capping Dawson buzzer beater and I’m about to start severance. I’m just gonna keep drinking bourbon til someone tells me to stop.
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🎶slow downnn you’re doing fine, you can’t be everything you wanna be before your time🎶
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Can’t wait for this hangover to go away Tuesday afternoon.
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Beginning to think I was lied to this whole time. Post grad so far has been just as, if not more fun than college.
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There’s hangovers and then there’s whatever the fuck is going on with me rn.
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Still being with your high school gf/bf is the equivalent of being homeschooled. You haven’t been able to experience life like others have.
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Mom introduced me to the iced fairlife protein shake + espresso combination and let me tell you. This is a game changer.
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I’m so excited for the Costco Guys and Rizzler South Park episode.
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There are two types of people in this world: those who like Arby’s and retards.
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Honestly, I often forget how many great, supportive friends I have if I actually need them. U guys are awesome.
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HAHAHAHA LETS GOOOOOO.
NEWS: #Gophers big man Treyton Thompson has entered his name into the NCAA Transfer Portal. Made 8 starts this season, averaging 2.1 points and 2.4 rebounds per-game.
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No tiësto for me too old and lame. Order of operations: .Smoke.Jerk.Watch new TMNT.bed.Ain’t much but it’s honest.
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Have you been drinking today sir?. Nope just coors light today. Okay carry on sir.
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This tree right here is just as alive as I am. This world is pretty cool, try to pay attention to little things that you typically overlook on a day to day basis. Makes you think and broadens your perspective
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Startin to get real fuckin tired of being retarded.
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@i_need_top @coochieman68 Thank god you wrapped ur little wee wee both times u got head on the street from that random French boy. Phew😮💨.
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Cigar in one hand. Drink in the other. Music playing. Sitting alone on the deck no thoughts in my mind just watching the trees sway and taking it all in.
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