Sage The Unruly
@Tochukwusage
Followers
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Statuses
88,276
*refuses to elaborate.
The Edge of Chaos.
Joined October 2016
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Pinned Tweet
Lol. Guys I made a first class in mechanical engineering. We move.
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You’ll be working remotely in this Nigeria for an international company. One day EFCC will just break into your house, and carry you.
Nobody will see you in the daily standup for 1 week. No notice. No information to your team. Because they locked you up and seized your gadgets.
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Let me tell you a story about when I was in final year.
We had a lecturer who was issuing vague threats about us failing his course. Unprovoked. A lot of my classmates interpreted it as a cue to “sort” him. A lot more depended on the power of their brains, and that despite his…
Someone said we use optimism as a coping mechanism. What will you advise?
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A Ric Hassani and Phyno collab?
"Thunder fire you nwannem onye ma echi?"
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I finally collected my PVC today, after registering since November last year.
I’d gone there thrice before today and it wasn’t ready all the while.
I already swore that if I go today and it wasn’t ready, I’d register as an INEC ad hoc staff.
One more vote for
#ObiDatti2023
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This tweet is evidence that many Nigerians don’t understand nuance in language. Obi is clearly absolving all Obidients of wrongdoing here. It’s very simple, really. If you’re violent and abusive, you’re not an Obidient.
Ergo, any accusation against Obidients cannot stick.
The use of subterfuge by people masquerading as Obidients to abuse and insult eminent personalities like Most Reverend Pastor Enoch Adeboye or anyone else is most unacceptable. Obidients are by and large, law-abiding citizens.
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I miss the days when I used to think our leaders were just incompetent. Now I've understood that they're really evil, and that every misfortune that has befallen us in this country was by design.
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The optimism we practice in Nigeria is the optimism of “even if the ground is not level, let my own ground favor me”
We relinquish so much power to unknown variables.
We’re optimistic because we’re pessimistic. And so, our optimism is really just pessimism.
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Our optimism is borne from cowardice. It’s borne from delusion. It’s borne from misplaced hope. We’ve been so badly brutalized, and yet, so ready to jump every hoop to make sure we don’t get an extra unit of pain. Our optimism is not based on “let’s fight today, because…
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This is our character as Nigerians, we have the tendency to bend over backwards as a people. And when it seems like there are some people who attempt a pushback against the evil system, because we’re so scared of the consequences, if things don’t work out, we side the oppressor…
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…in a silent supplication of “I’m not among them”
We chide the protestors openly so that when the oppressor comes with a heavy hand, we can plausibly deny and escape the oppressor’s boot. We, however, seem not to learn that the oppressor’s boots never discriminate.
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@ls_kpagih
One guy told a story about how while in Uniben, they were walking in the dark while smoking. About 5 hefty men. They saw a lone guy walking towards them. The guy had a backpack, as he got closer, he removed the bag from his back
All of them scattered
Think say he wan pull gun
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…fortune favors the brave” it’s based on “let’s run away from this fight, so we can live to run another day”
It’s an optimism of the grave.
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That is the kind of optimism we want. We want an optimism where the system works, and we’re all assured that our efforts would be commensurate with the results. We’re not asking for much, just a level playing ground.
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Over and over again, because we never present a united front, in our folly of false optimism. The resistance of the few then fails. Because while they were fighting off our oppressors with one hand, they were fighting us off with the other hand.
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If Nigeria is not helping its youth, honestly I can live with that. It starts getting scary when you deep it and realize that Nigeria is actually working overtime to discourage its youth. Taking them out with “extreme prejudice”
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Suffice it to say that the HOD took matters into his hands and reassigned the marking of the course to other lecturers. The issue was resolved, and students had a very high passing rate for the course.
In the end, everyone was happy. Except, maybe, the lecturer.
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It’s only when you deep it that you realize that most of the weird shit going on in this country is in no way, normal at all. Where do Law Enforcement agents break into your house after scaling the walls, when you’re neither armed nor dangerous, nor accused of any crimes?
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@AtamanKa04
@samhe1999
@GuillotineTLN
@SamBeckwith7
@Chmiseverte
@nofkaere
@OrwellNGoode
Yes! That’s the meme!
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…their anger at the “unknown tattletales” in the class WhatsApp group. They kept asking why we reported, and now things would likely get uglier, and the lecturer would take it out on us in the marking. I kept quiet. We (the tattlers) all kept quiet.
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SARS might even carry you and kill you. And just like that, your Discord or Slack will grow cold. The team might try reaching out to you. Nothing. Because Discord/Slack is the only means of communication.
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I never tweeted about how EFCC broke into my house by 5am in the morning, because Nigeria has abused me so much that I didn’t even see it as such a big deal. I just smh and moved on like nothing happened.
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…threats, they were still going to pass the course.
This man released so many materials, enough to throttle a horse. He merged all the Materials/Metallurgy coursework from 2nd year to final year. It was clearly overwhelming. It was also near-impossible to cover.
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So they chalk it up to horrible work ethics or whatever weird shit y’all have going on in your backwater country. And become more wary of hiring Nigerians.
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Here’s where it gets interesting.
I coordinated some of my classmates to report this lecturer to our head of department, he promised to protect our identities (what a man!)
When the news broke that some students reported the lecturer, some of my classmates were expressing…
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@varsilias
@enigma_i_am
Exactly. This happens too. People who assume you’re fraudster because you’re indoors.
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@DoubleEph
I was waiting for when the writer will talk about how the Big Man showed him all he was doing, and the other big plans he has for the country. He's not a good man, he's just a new friend you made, and you're star struck, and I totally get it.
But
He's not a good man
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Growing up, I used to read Femi Adesina's posts at the back of Daily Sun newspaper. Mehn. I used to respect that guy. He was among the people I believed were incorruptible and principled. He and Festus Keyamo.
Let's a take few minutes and laugh at me.
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Of the 3 major candidates, the ObiDatti ticket presented the most balanced ticket wrt tribe & religion
It also ranks highest in capacity, competence, & character
If you voted any of the other 2 candidates, I understand that who you vote is your choice, but your choice is stupid
Unpopular opinion about Nigeria that would get you in this position?
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Nigga stood awake all night in silent protest of police brutality. And upon the crack of dawn, he charged upon the ramparts of the tormentors, with his warriors
I Stan harder than ever
All
@mrmacaronii
's past, present and future skits, the funniest ever
✊🏾
#EndSARS
#EndSarsNow
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@iambarzini_
@corporateewa
I’ve been here wondering what thought process convinced them that blocking an aggrieved customer was the best thing to do.
It makes zero sense.
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@AjeboDanny
I’m not a supporter but I think the media has painted him as a bad person. I need to learn about him myself.
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Seeing staunch emilokanites folding is so powerful that it transports me from our collective frame of reference where we’re all suffering, to a higher reference frame where I’m both an observer & a participant of the collective suffering
It’s like drinking cold water in hellfire
Seems like we are working just to have money to buy fuel alone. Food is now a luxury.
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I hear that Okezie Ikpeazu did not pay pensioners for over 30 months. Do you know how cruel and callous it is to withhold a person’s only source of livelihood for 30 months?
That’s not even the worst part. The worst part is when you realize that pension is literally a part…
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@Letter_to_Jack
I can’t count how many times I’ve told someone “I owe you an apology, I wasn’t familiar with your games” and they just looked through me because they didn’t get the reference. I do find it a bit frustrating tbh.
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The new trailer for ‘MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: DEAD RECKONING - PART ONE’ has been released.
The film releases on July 12 in theaters.
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@DavidHundeyin
I find it surprising that people are taking that excuse of an apology seriously. Someone who likened you to less than cows comes to apologize to you, clearly for personal gain. And you forgive everything. Someone who has been conditioned to hate you from day one?
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I read an interesting answer on Quora this morning. The writer said that a person with an IQ of 900 would likely perform poorly if raised in a family that makes it so. He went ahead to expand on this by talking about how very intelligent people might never realize their full…
Nigeria only changes when we as a nation decides to change. and a nation where the the average person is as dense as a cement block, can never change.
You may not want to hear it, but for our generation you have two choices; Run away, or create a tiny bubble you can enjoy.
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@SeniormanOA
These people dey muzz me. You no believe in God. You still hate am💀
No be juju be that?
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I voted for Peter Obi.
first quarter is over. What have you achieved this year.?
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So I built and deployed a twitter retweet bot to help me continue retweeting every tweet that contains the hashtag
#SARSMUSTEND
whether I'm online or offline.
So even as I dey go sleep now, my account no go sleep. He go dey retweet dey go✊🏾✊🏾✊🏾✊🏾
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@Alex_Houseof308
Hahahahahhahha 😂😂😂😂😭
Desist from widening the gap between myself and your erudite person
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According to the ideal gas law where the equation of state is given as PV=n(RT), n is the amount of substance. R is a constant 8.3145. T is the temperature in Kelvin. If T≈0.6014K, RT≈5
Observe that the temperature is very low. This is proof that the response (5n) is ice cold.
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This is very important because informal taxes are like the taxes paid to gangs. You pay for protection. Protection against whom? The gang. You’re literally paying taxes to them to protect you against them.
That’s exactly how these agbero taxes are.
LAGOSIANS LISTEN!!
"Accountability is missing in the governance of Lagos State" - Gbadebo Rhodes-Vivour (GRV)
@GRVlagos
Trends Table : Saga | Daniel Bwala | USSD | Ali Baba | Arise TV | Pharmsav | Iphone 14
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@ToyosiGodwin
@dosunmu_joshua
Yeah. This was our biggest worry. But thankfully, this one was a good man. Sorry about that, man.
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@_sobechi
@urchilla01
You’d notice that he said it involuntarily. He’s a good man like that.
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Before I make any comments, lemme ask: are you angry that he's portraying a fake life, or that he didn't buy you one whole fish?
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The man who taught us Metallurgy in 500 level said he would enjoy seeing us fail. I paraphrase, but that is the gist of what he said anyways.
He merged all the metallurgy materials from 200L to 500L into a single course. Then he dared us to pass.
His challenge was accepted.
If you can make a First class in a private university you can make the same First class in federal university. Stop discrediting us, nobody dashes marks in private schools. We have to work just as hard
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A = Atikulated.
B = BATified.
O = Obidient.
AB = universal recipient, which means these two guys want to suck Nigeria’s blood.
O = universal donor. Which means Obi wants to transfuse blood back into the Nigerian economy.
Choose your 🐐 wisely.
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@TickleMe_Gold
@yitsugee
Plot twist: in thirteen years time, time travel is cracked and the guy actually travels through time, just to reenact that iconic moment.
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So, it is safe to say that Buhari don looseguard?
Buhari Loses Personal Bodyguard | Sahara Reporters
President
@MBuhari
has announced the death of his personal bodyguard, Wo Lawal Mato.
READ MORE:
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@urchilla01
I’m beginning to think none of us truly appreciates how landslide Obi’s victory might have been. We probably think he won with a slim margin. Man more likely flogged the other candidates silly. And by a dizzying margin too.
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Back then in SS2 when our Further Math teacher introduced differential equations, there was a very important analogy he made that has stuck with me. He talked about the trajectory of a rocket. He told us that if a rocket, while taking off, is placed in a trajectory that is...
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See the VP Obi chose. And you’re telling me his plan is not for the best for Nigeria?
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A lot of people have already pointed out the dishonesty of this opinion, and I’ll just say this in addition:
Hoping that Tinubu would deliver good governance is many, many, many degrees more delusional than hoping for the recovery of our stolen mandate.
There will be no ‘recovery’ of anything, Tinubu will stay President.
All we can do is insult him every now & then while genuinely hoping he proves most of us wrong. I really hope he does.
But if it’s about “mandate recovery” lol forget it.
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Nigerians can hammer any situation into just the shape, such that it’d be a perfect conduit for their faux classism/empty bragging.
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Left your ancestors’ religion to pursue what the white man brought to you, but it’s how Catholics practice their religion that you draw the line?
Jesus said "I am the way, truth and the life; NO ONE comes to the father except through ME"
So why do Catholics involve Mary and ask her to intercede for them? She's human like us and worse still, she's dead so why? Then there's the aspect of her image which is easily idolatry💁🏽♂️
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Been long I shared a win on here, but these guys said I'm "a capable and skilled software engineer." And believe me, every word is true.
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@Pieterjanfrees
@zakashisensei
@clitdad
@Uzoma_ao
@tha_Gidi
@HollywoodPac_
@poopdiddyscoop
@worldwidesmert
@SwagDntPayBills
@SekushiiC
@hamieyt
@uhliaa
@The8ayley
The underdressed undertaker.
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@Kaita26_27
@doluu_a
@sakinasyero
@NCDCgov
You seem so so sure, care to tell us why? Are you a doctor? Have you developed a secret cure? Have you developed a remote testing method? Are you mad? Is your brain paining you? Are NCDC?
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@Damnujay
@urchilla01
@UchePOkoye
@Jack_ng01
@OlisaOsega
@AfamDeluxo
@FS_Yusuf_
@Girl_isBlessed
@IkukuomaC
@MrMekzy_
@UgwunnaEjikem
@MissPearls
We are 5 now.
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I thought it was obvious to everyone until I started seeing the hot takes.
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It's funny that his name is Adekunle Good (Ag). But Ag is the chemical symbol for silver.
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Reno Omokri is a bottom barrel human.
Imagine translating his tweets to Hausa just to effectively pit the North against Igbos?
And for what?
A person you know is a good man.
Just because some money changed hands. You’re attacking him and his people in the vilest way possible.
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Lmaooo. Why you dey talk like Juju man. We can't "believe it or not." Tell us how it works, that's how scientists do.
If it doesn't run on fuel, does it have another prime mover? Or does it run on vibes and inshallah?
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@LawalBabatu
@OluniyiGates
@dmaryjane_real
This thing dey burst my head because if you rearrange "anthem", it becomes "Na them"
Beautiful anagram🤭🤭😅😅
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@Tunde_OD
Normally…as a normal human being…you should know the theme song of The Big Bang Theory.
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