Michael🇵🇸
@SelfishMichael
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This kinda relates to my theory I have which is a man who is attracted to women would find a beautiful woman appealing
I have a theory that every heterosexual irony poisoned leftist twitter bro could be immediately disarmed by attention from a super basic normie hot blonde girl like this
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Woah!! A lover of coke & philosophy, you are one interesting chica…
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1. Used to dress like guy no.4 but his girlfriend updated his wardrobe, he will cheat on her.
2. Five DUI’s
3. Gay man
4. British
Men, what is keeping you from dressing like this?
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My brother in christ have u ever searched for ur own handle + “women”
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Ex situationship went on a story liking spree and slid in the DM’s
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What’s stopping you from asking that
e-girl on the other side of the country to be your valentine?
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This the fit pic nook
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Jesus wept “Michael you can’t bust out the loafers today, your swag is too different.”
I replied “ but it’s fucking nice out.”
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@KrangTNelson
Excuse me is there any chance you could dm me the top left photo and the 2nd photo in from the right on the bottom row? I need to add to my collection. Thank you!
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When I see this on the e-girls profile it’s an automatic follow
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Fit pic nook of course
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Would you look at that, it’s just another white boy on 35mm film
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If she calls u a creep and a weirdo during oral thats radiohead
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When I have a girl over she gets to go home with a celebratory tote
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It’s that time again where I ask myself, can a new pair of pants fix me?
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Krispy Kreme bench is for sucking, butter bench is for fucking.
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Last fit pic ever in the stairway mirror 🥺😢
New fit pit location debuting soon!
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Had a freakin epic-sauce time at a rooftop party yesterday
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Shout to my man
@lonelygodmusic
he wined and dined me at The Ivy and showed me around LA. All because of this stupid website called twitter ❤️
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While your worried getting mo money I’m just posted up in my mohair
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The real fit check Friday
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That guy with the tote bag, wearing loafers won’t save you
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🚨PLEASE SHARE🚨 My father is missing, In the Arlington,Va area. Usually seen chasing a bag, all around just hustlin’. Last seen standing on business.
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Fw me Friday is canceled, it’s now love and cherish me Friday. Will you love & cherish me?
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Let’s see a pic of you wearing a hat
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Hawk toot
I’m gonna shit on that thang
I’m gonna do something that I need to preemptively apologize for, so this me saying I’m sorry.
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Not my white ass waking up feeling well rested and ready to tackle the day
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Going to the getting uncomfortably high store y’all need anything?
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Happy anniversary
@halo_man_VEVO
Halo 2 for Xbox was released on this day in North America, 15 years ago (2004)
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Just saw a middle aged man in a suit driving with no lights on, windows down, absolutely blasting “Lover, You Should’ve Come Over” by Jeff Buckley.
I hope that dudes okay.
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I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job I hate my job
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The face of a man seeing someone hold their phone to their forehead with the words BRAT written in big letters for 506th time of the night.
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@CurtisRemarc
That’s it??? Very weak. You have to have at least two bottles of Clase Azul. Also the picture of your cat must be kept on the SAME shelf as the eggs, it’s good luck.
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Forgot to post yesterday fit, my apologies it won’t happen again
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How I dress
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I got a feeling
That tonight's gonna be a good night
That tonight's gonna be a good night
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You may be asking “Michael do you really need to get a fit off at Trader Joe’s?” Of course silly, where else am I gonna find the Porsche Macan driving MILF of my dreams
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