Nozza_
@Nozza_
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I'm only telling you what the spirits are telling me.
Joined November 2010
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Pinned Tweet
I never hit a six in all my days playing. I had one given by the umpire once, only for my dad to signal on the boundary that it was actually a four
Most Tests before hitting a six:
102 Glenn McGrath
100 Ishant Sharma
65 Ian Redpath
Derek Underwood has regained the record for most Tests without hitting a six (86)
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He sounds like Mark Goldbridge when United concede to some mid-table side
Fuck a drive thru, me and the homies hate drive thrus
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What are the first five words of the National Anthem?
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I made a compilation of players following up a rebound after a goal has been scored and missing.
Enjoy!
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Don't remember Liverpool fans in 1939 tweeting 'Blackpool should be awarded the title' when the league was abandoned 🤔
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Someone beheaded the University of Manchester Conservative Society's Margaret Thatcher cut-out at Freshers Fair.
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"Some lower and non-league clubs may die, but it's a sacrifice I am willing to make..."
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Get your Silva Mexes Tyler-Earnshaw name by combining your fav early Abu Dhabi-era City signing, your fav Euro 2012 France squad member, your fav former Sky Sports commentator & your fav player to score a Premier League hat-trick at The Valley. Mine’s Toure Diarra Gray-Mendonca
💎 This is really really special
My incredible son Silva Mexes Tyler-Earnshaw
who is known as Silva Mexes has signed for
Manchester United academy 💥🔴
I am so so proud
He has worked hard & it’s such a blessing to
see him find his passion and make this journey.
I love you
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Absolute carnage and this bloke casually nips back to get his pint.
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There’s a bloke on the Charlton forum who claims to have only missed 5 episodes of Soccer AM in 28 years
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Nothing makes me feel better about my hairline than going to a gig for the music I like
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Everyone saying it’s incredible that Liverpool got 97 points and didn’t win the league - where were you when Dorking Wanderers got 105 points in the Isthmian League Division One South in 2016/17 and came second?
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Why was Ron Atkinson wearing a Public Enemy cap during an Aston Villa training session
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I like to imagine there’s a Leverkusen fan that’s been saying “We’re due a defeat” all season turning to their mates and going “I told you so” right now
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Ricky Ponting: *insightful commentary*
KP: Wow. My word, Joe Root. What a player. Wow. Supreme talent. Such skill. An elite player. Wow.
Eoin Morgan: Usman Khawaja is a big NBA fan
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Andy Gray commentating on goals where the keeper had…𝐚𝐛𝐬𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐧𝐨 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞
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James Anderson goes past Shane Warne’s 702 Test wickets (against actual countries, not including nonsense World XI matches that should never have Test match status)
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The real reason you should dislike Wrexham is because they relegated Boston United to non-league, and in doing so ended Boston Goals on Soccer AM
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Still struggling to come to terms with the size of this Wolves mascot tbh.
http://t.co/dnKVpMI6pt
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Chris Coleman’s response to being called a prick by a Sunderland fan remains one of the funniest bits of TV I’ve ever seen
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When you remember mid-tweet that it will do better numbers if it’s in Scottish
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Gonna start calling the Premier League 'the Barclays' and eventually rebrand as Mr. Barclays
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Fans celebrating a goal and then realising it hasn’t gone in is one of the best sights in football
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Need to share this incredible pronunciation of ‘Katich’ by Shane Warne with you all
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Every Bazball Test is either our greatest ever victory or our stupidest defeat
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You had to be there
What’s the Blast equivalent of ‘Barclays men’ off the top of my head I’ve come up with
Ravi Bopara
Samit Patel
Luke Fletcher
Roelof van der Merwe
Luke Wright
I’m open to suggestions
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Fair play, this has to be one of the most poorly-judged tweets I’ve ever seen
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This Is Manchester United We’re Talking About
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Charlie George
Who is the first person you think of when you see this? 💛❤️
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Huge fan of Nathan Jones repeatedly building up his reputation massively at Luton before jumping ship at the first opportunity and completely destroying it
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What a terrible name for a football ground, it reminds me of that tragedy
Alternative names for the new stadium if not Old Trafford
(Throwing ideas out/ones I’ve already seen)
INEOS Stadium, Old Trafford
Sir Matt Busby/SAF/Bobby Charlton Stadium
The 1958 Arena
The Devils’ Pit
The (Red) Theatre
Manchester United Stadium 🥴
New Trafford 🤢
Any others?
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Incredible footage has emerged suggesting that Phil Neville isn’t sexist, this is just how he is.
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Shoutout everyone in Beijing setting an alarm for 2am to stream Cambridge vs Charlton in the Bristol Street Motors Trophy
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Thread: Why Darren Bent was a better footballer than Didier Drogba. Only facts.
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Why does Mark Clattenburg look like he's about to take the best free-kick of the season?
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Lowest budget in the league, no squad at the start of the season, an absurd injury crisis, Gallagher recalled in January, ownership debacle, transfer ban, best player refusing to play & we took it to the last game & were minutes from surviving. Bowyer worked miracles tbh.
#cafc
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Australia try not to cheat at sport challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)
A spying row has erupted ahead of Australia & England's
#FIFAWWC
semi-final, after the Australian Daily Telegraph sent a helicopter to film Sarina Wiegman's
#Lionesses
during a closed training session.
@TeleFootball
colleague
@LukeEdwardsTele
reports
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I never thought I'd say this, but can I hear more from ‘The Grade Cricketer’ please?
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Triumphing in a home World Cup you’ve spent years preparing for and would be an unmitigated disaster if you didn’t win isn’t for every country
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An incredible revelation! Want to find out more? Google ‘Australia 2018 ball scandal’
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Nigel Pearson’s son racially abusing Thai prostitutes as they licked out his arsehole has given us the most exciting season ever.
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That incredible finale only topped by Neil Warnock telling Nuno Espirito Santo to “fuck off”
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Duncan Ferguson saw this challenge and called Inniss’ agent immediately
Welcome to The New Lawn, Ryan Inniss🤝
The 6’6” defender becomes our first signing of the summer👇
#WeAreFGR
💚
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"Troy Deeney's infant son may die, but it's a sacrifice I am willing to make..."
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Argentina’s elimination from the World Cup: 30th June @ 4:54pm
Portugal’s elimination from the World Cup: 30th June @ 8:55pm
Ronaldo takes Portugal further in the tournament than Messi took Argentina.
#TheDifference
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By 9.15 this morning a bloke in the office managed to drop both a “were you bunking yesterday?” to me when I was on compassionate leave AND a “have you proposed to your girlfriend yet?” to another colleague who has just been dumped 😂😂
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If you think this defending is bad from West Ham, remember that Sunderland once scored three own goals in seven minutes
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