Humble Council Estate Lad
@HumbleChavPunk
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I’ve always thought that Keighley should have a fully functioning tram system.
Joined October 2021
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Bagel in the mud.
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It’s absolutely infuriating how Deepti positions herself as a spokeswoman for ‘the disabled’. Not only does she use it in an essentialist way but she assumes ‘the disabled’ will share her conception of public health. What of people who don’t share her views?
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That new Independent SAGE poster designed by Pagel Infomatics.
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Just got the train to Greggs for the first time in 24 hours!
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Been thinking a lot of my friend Antony recently, who used to irritate me by taking photos of me like this. He killed himself during the first lockdown. His mother wasn’t allowed to go in to hug his son because of ‘the rules’, an absolutely heartbreaking wrong. I miss him a lot.
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@HSJEditor
If Plan C is for a full Wuhan-style lockdown for boomer middle class academics and journalists then I’m fully on board. 👍
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Eat Out To Help Out was fucking brilliant. The best thing the Conservative Party has ever done in my opinion, and upset all the right people.
Eat out to help out gave millions of people, who were at low risk from covid, a chance to socialise and be some what normal after THREE months of being in a lockdown but these folks act like it was an inconvenience to their experiment.
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Never forget what the fuckers and the doctor-professors enabled and supported in the name of public health.
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The Man Who Will Never Fuck Off.
Tony Blair Institute says Government must be prepared to bring back mandatory face masks on public transport
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Eleven years ago today I was getting irritated by everyone constantly banging on about swine flu.
Great days.
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FFS. Another weekend ruined. 😢
In the light of the Queen's death, Independent SAGE has decided to cancel tomorrow's public briefing as a mark of respect. We offer our deepest condolences to the Queen's family.
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My mum’s birthday cake is something marvellous.
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Absolutely disgusting lack of public health measures.
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One of the most important things I have learned as a professor of blancmange - a job which, ostensibly, is all about imparting information - is making a new Twitter account and saying ‘You’re evil!’ and then deleting said account.
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Morally impure because caught covid? ❌
Coercive behaviour in a relationship? ✅
@Clementine_Ja
My 65yo wife didn't throw tantrums but just quietly rebelled by not masking in public when I wasn't around.
That's why she's been miserable for a week with Covid, lonely at home because I'm spending minimal time with her & she can't see friends, & her dog died a week earlier.
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Ravi Gupta: Something is happening in Botswana. Full mitigations now!
Gupta Lab: Well said! This government is responsible for mass murder.
Ravi Gupta: Indeed. And yet Nick Tiggle cons the British public.
Gupta Lab: Do you mind me quote-tweeting this with some musings of my own?
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For all its pitfalls, Twitter people have made me sane this year, in no particular order
@mushroomracer
@seventiessally
@LongTallScally_
@skepticalzebra
@RufusSG
@iaugust93
@Katlogic88
@RightsRobins
@JamieKav86
and many more because I’m bored now, thanks and happy new year.
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I love a good rebel, me! Sex Pistols and all that!
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The Covid Safety Pledge assures that only people with a six figure income are responsible enough to travel abroad for work or pleasure.
@ReicherStephen
Steve,
I’ve been very many times to Ljubliana - it’s a really beautiful city. I guess you won’t get a chance to go to Bled? If not, you must return.
@TitAlbreht
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Show your support for harassed and low paid careworkers by guilt-tripping the thick poor sods into wearing PPE at all times forever and ever, by a Very Left Wing Guardian columnist.
Seriously: it shows that if you’re one of the many pharmacists or GP receptionists etc who no longer wear a mask, you’re not only endangering your patient’s lives - you’re signalling to the public that they can do the same. Public health messaging matters. Just ask the Tories.
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Keep seeing this guy on here. Who is he? This is a disgraceful comment and one that I find both offensive and genuinely repellent. I think we should honour our pensioners, particularly the washed ones who got on their bike. Take care, and I really do mean: Take care.
@jude5456
@BorisJohnson
Too many washed pensioners moaning during COVID stopping me from going out having fun. Really got me annoyed
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Dull middle class academic boomer who probably thinks himself the epitome of left wing compassion thinks that no-one really likes socialising and it’s just damn common sense. Over two years of this absolute University of Waitrose-Remain filth.
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Starting to change my mind about this guy’s stand-up routine. This is hilarious! Bravo, sir! 👏
It’s tragic to think how much of everything we have endured and lost over the last 20 months could have been avoided if we had had a good mask policy with high quality masks.
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For the model, I’d like four glitter explosions. Twelve puff-flashes. So the sequence should be puff, flash, puff, flash, bang. Well, basically, can I have a condensed Pink Floyd concert for £500? Okay, thanks, Graham!
@FraserNelson
@doug_no1
@TAH_Sci
@juji_gatami
We generally model what we are asked to model. There is a dialogue in which policy teams discuss with the modellers what they need to inform their policy
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First they came for our ciggies.
Then they came for our vapes
Then they came for our morning coffees.
Next they will be targeting your wanks.
A growing contingent of people says caffeine is just as potentially addictive and dangerous as other psychoactive chemicals, and that it's time we start thinking about and regulating it as such.
I write about the anti-caffeine movement for
@Esquire
:
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Thank God for that! It’s been verified by Chris Turnbull and not some nutter! Had me worried there.
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RIP Rachel. I didn’t read your book but I still know it was shit.
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Answer to bottom right: Don’t read The Guardian.
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Hello mate do you remember when you were fucking outraged when the cunting Tories let us go to pubs again and you were so furious you could swear due to the resultant genocide and then the next week you were fucking live-tweeting about how great it was to be back at a bastard bar
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On a scale of one to Barry, how well do you think this thread aged?
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I'm sorry to say it on New Year's Day, but I think there is a serious chance now that the UK government's omicron gamble is about to go tits up....
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Please send my adorable dog virtual treats as he is currently at the vets having a big operation and I’m worried sick!
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Honestly, it completely baffles me why the nation just won’t listen to these two!
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This comes as no surprise from FPBE’s favourite grifter Simon Harris aka ‘Man Behaving Dadly 😂😂🤣🤣’.
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Lilico saying goodbye to his M&S lamb mince before he puts it into quarantine in March 2020.
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NEW: John Burn-Murdoch.
A 🧵 on why this might be the case. 👇🏿
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Overheard a young girl on the express train carriage to Huyton talking openly of picking their nose to mine for bogies, and dirty poo poo. I picked her up and gave her some firm but sound principles to consider before I notified the Fat Controller.
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@unheardparent
Already having chronic suicidal thoughts, then lockdown was announced and I had a breakdown and very likely made the aforementioned thoughts worse.
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This is what left wing rebellion looks like! 👌 Reminds me of my youth when I first discovered Crass and Conflict!
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I wish I gallivanted around the world as much as members of Independent SAGE did.
right - off on holiday for a couple of weeks now! expect much reduced service on twitter :-).
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My favourite Twitter person!
It’s not that I like Johnson or the Conservatives party. I just hate the FBPE, save our NHS, lockdown harder, longer, masks forever, close the borders, virtue signalling twats more.
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University of Education megamind uses the worst language of the covid era to tell the masses what is necessary.
@paul_worton
@alexmaccaroon
Take a train (which we could subsidise with the flight tax proceeds). My immediate family live on different continents to me. We’d have to see less of each other in person and do more video calls. It really sucks! But it’s necessary.
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Sign up to my Only Fans and get:
* Fecal-oral transmission.
* Eating cock and sucking pussy. * Orogenital contact.
Kinks: Safety.
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Please be aware that there’s some fake Twitter posts purporting to be by George Monbiot that appear to be giving the impression that he’s a boring hypocritical thicko.
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BLUE HEART ATTACK.
@Pauline59778691
@PK054
@Mrplory1
@NHSActivistRN
@Jackiehilton44
@EveryDoctorUK
@JujuliaGrace
We do not condone EveryDoctor which is run by someone who doesn’t work in the NHS & hasn’t picked up a single shift during the pandemic yet claims to represent NHS staff. Whilst flogging masks in the spirit of fundraising for NHS staff whilst paying themselves an salary to do so.
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You’ve got a direct line to the thoughts of the hospitality sector, have you? Party animal, are you? Full of joy de vivre and grasping of the moment? Not a boring middle class boomer academic that talks utter psychotic nonce-sense, then?
The news from the hospitality sector is that people are taking lockdown seriously. But that means Rishi Sunak should be back at the Despatch Box with more support measures for the economy and people hit hard by this. When will that happen?
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@sajidjavid
I wear a fresh pair of y-fronts (sturdy ones) every day and I’ve been double-vaccinated. Never had you down as someone that caved into Guardian opinion-formers.
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Do you look your age/post a pic?
38. And I look ten years older thanks to a combination of too much drinking and drugtaking in my twenties, having to bring up a baby practically single-handed, and going mental during the lockdowns.
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I know I’ve said it countless times on here but once again I’m wondering whether Tony Blair will ever just fuck off.
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No, thanks. I don’t want to be part of your sex festival.
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@Eyecatcher_Pro
I think Peter Hitchens was right when he said that calling Corbyn a Trotskyist was giving him too much credit.
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Kids photos are boring and irritating, I know, but she was ridiculously cute.
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I have informed the BBC that I won’t be appearing on Match of the Day tomorrow night.
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So ruddy bloody brave.
@Palliative_Scot
@UCL_CORU
yes, we discussed inside or outside as a team and agreed outside.
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What's a tweet that's so canonical in your mind you make shorthand reference to it, even if people might not know what you're talking about? (I sometimes just say "uh oh y'all it's gettin' kinda hazy" expecting people to get it)
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Happy Mother’s Day to me. I’ve done a lot for this country.
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There’s something deeply and strangely powerful about this image of Noel Edmonds.
TV presenter and producer Noel Edmonds is photographed for the Independent in Dartmoor, England (1999)
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This should have been sufficient for the government’s covid information campaign.
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What do you want us to do? Lock down? Flagellate ourselves every time something bad happens?
Does anyone else find it disconcerting that normal entertainment shows, sport etc is continuing as normal?
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Possibly one of those most ridiculous things I have read.
This is awful news. Paul’s life and his tenacity and bravery were astonishing. That one of the last polio survivors - who lived much of his life in an iron lung - was killed by covid is such a devastating symbol of how society has failed to protect disabled people in the pandemic
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Went to a school assembly this morning as my daughter got Star of the Week and it’s like a Communist Party congress the amount of clapping and fawning you have to do.
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BTW am I part of the fabled community ‘the disabled’ because I have chronic depression and have suicidal thoughts nearly every day? Does Deepti speak for me? 🤔
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Thickest man on Twitter.
I know we’re all angry about the parties.
Can we also be angry about the ‘lowest restrictions in Europe’ in the nation that coincidentally has the highest deaths in Europe, and about the 5 day isolation which puts about 1/3 of people back into society while infectious.
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Please, even if you haven’t got any hands, please, wash your hands.
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It’s been one hell of a pandemic and Twitter experience.
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In addition, one thing that came as no surprise shortly after the covid restrictions were lifted was that a load of the supposedly freedom-loving haters of lockdowns were just authoritarian reactionary bigots of another kind.
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Honestly, some GPs are patronising twats. I’m 36 and I’ve felt like shit since my early teens so I don’t need to be told to go for a walk in the morning or try and get out more when I wish I was fucking dead.
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Just popped into a local butcher’s shop in Keighley. And the butcher said: ‘Are you HumbleChavPunk from Twitter? What you are doing is amazing. Keep going.’
This sort of thing is happening a lot now. It’s both discombobulating and heartening in equal measure.
Every day I am stopped repeatedly in the street, in cafes or on the tube by people who say (often tearfully)
“Keep going. We are behind you. You speak for the silent majority.”
Today I asked myself for the first time ever.
What is the point in speaking for a silent majority?
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Remember this Christmas if you don’t want to catch omicron then just don’t fucking do anything ever and that’s science.
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Let’s face it, the best protection against monkeypox, as with covid, will be cigs - especially when inhaled within a public house.
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For a broad-based leftism that is against gammon and Rejoins EU.
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I just find it funny that the makers of this survey consider the Greens highly progressive when they want us to live like Presbyterian cavemen.
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