I Died In The Bible
@DieAbelDie
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I am things | f/1.8 | #FRABEL | $DieAbelDie (not business/professional related)
Gallifrey, AZ
Joined March 2009
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The plan? We name your landscaping company after a fancy hotel to trick the President of the United States into holding a press conference outside of your business.
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Those who rep these decals on their vehicles, should be the first to be drafted into
#WorldWarThree
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Barack Obama is scared of me!
Because I don't swallow knowledge and I spit it for free!
Let me clear my throat, ah ha, ha ha!
PIERCE HAWTHORNE IS MY MASTER. PREPARE TO MEET YOUR DOOM!
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When I was dat young boi my father took me to the city to see a marching band
He said, o shit waddup!
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Oh my God, Luis Guzmân! Can I just say, I loved you innnnn… IMDB.
imagine running up to a celebrity and only saying u recognize them from a thing they were part of but absolutely not popular for
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Holy shit
This guy randomly messaged me on facebook in hopes that I might help him. He's been looking for over 10 years for my old band's EP. It meant so much to him and this makes me so happy
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funniest sitcom scene and whatnot. but what's the SADDEST sitcom scene?
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Damn this tweet blew up, so just wanted to set some things clear
• ACAB
• FREE PALESTINE
• BLACK LIVES MATTER
• SUPPORT TRANS LIVES
• UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE
• JOIN A UNION
• GET VAXXED, STAY MASKED
• SIX SEASONS AND A MOVIE
• CAESAR IS BETTER THAN RANCH
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i want to kill MY P U S S Y
myself I N B I O
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HAPPY WHITE PEOPLE LOVE TO CONSUME TACOS AND MARGARITAS BUT STILL SUPPORT ICE AND WANT TO BUILD A WALL DAY!
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You'll never shut down the Delta Cubes
On this date 14 years ago, the Pilot aired! Written by Dan Harmon and directed by Anthony Russo & Joe Russo, and I have been weird ever since.
You know what makes humans different from other animals?
Feet.
No, no no. Come on, bears have feet.
#OriginalAiring
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@LizzieCosmos
Also
If you use any rebate rewards apps, Use the found receipts and claim those bucks
Got like 5 bucks once cuz someone bought a bottle of fancy vodka and littered.
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-passing several circle k's while cop that pulled me over takes me to an ice detention center cuz the color of my skin-
I'm not getting that Polar Pop am i?
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Twitter, it's been a pleasure fighting with you. Some of us won't make it, but there is a place where we will all see each other again, and that place is Denny's.
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WHEN 👏YOU 👏 CHOKE 👏 A 👏GIRL 👏 DURING 👏 SEX 👏 LOOP 👏 YOUR 👏 ARM 👏 AROUND 👏 HER 👏 NECK👏 AND 👏 SQUEEZE 👏 YOU'RE 👏SUPPOSED 👏 TO 👏 KNOCK 👏 HER 👏OUT 👏 AND 👏 WIN 👏 THE 👏 BELT 👏 NOT 👏 KILL 👏 HER 👏
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summoning circle, hope this works:
🕯
🕯 🕯
🕯 another 🕯
🕯 Brendan Fraser 🕯
🕯 Mummy movie 🕯
🕯 🕯
🕯 🕯
🕯
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NO I WILL NOT SHUT UP ABOUT
#SIXSEASONSANDAMOVIE
You followed me for my sexy and funny tweets so now you have to endure what I'm really about
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Ladies, if some random guy asks for your number, ask for his phone & text GIVE to 82634 to chip in $10 to
@BernieSanders
from his phone bill
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If you don't send positive vibes to Bean for his surgery today, you will be mentioned by name in my suicide note
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[Sobbingly]
A....ACAB incl...ludes
Godzilla was recently made police chief of a Tokyo station for one day.
(via:
@14_kaiju
)
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Yeah, I'm into BDSM
BrendanFraser
Doing
SomeMore
Movies
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The Opposite Of December/Tear From The Red, You Come Before You, Versions, The Tropic Rot
It just makes sense
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Some of y'all never burned off the tips of your fingers trying to flip over tortillas and it shows
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Everyone please love your fur children extra today
Cup had a fatal reaction to anesthesia yesterday during her spay surgery.
It's been the worst 20 some odd hours for kylee and I.
She was less than a year old, but so full of wonder and silliness.
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You don't have a Valentine on Valentine's Day?
Some people don't have a tree on Arbor Day or a dream on MLK Day.
So shut the fuck up.
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Community aired 8 years ago.
It helped me & others through so much.
Introduced me to new twitter/real life friends.
Thank you
@danharmon
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@CommRewatchPod
@CommunityTV
Dean bursting in while wearing a ridiculous outfit and say DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IVE BEEN HOLDING ON TO THIS!?
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Classmates sign goodbye note as child dies from preventable diseases by simply vaccinating
A kid cries as he holds a goodbye note his classmates wrote in goodbye as he is kicked out of school in
#NewYork
by the
#bigoted
and ignorant
#democratparty
lawmakers bought of by
#BigPharma
, who repealed religious exceptions - This is straight up hate & discrimination.
#Vaccines
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We know it's gonna happen
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G
Welcome to the Black Parade - My Chemical Romance (2006)
0:00 - 0:01
Rumor has it, there’s a musical note that makes women involuntarily orgasm. We set out to find it:
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Katamari Died In The Prison
Duquette 🤝 Of The Holy Office
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I’m:
⚪️ Gay
⚪️ Straight
🔘 coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
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People on facebook saying their happy 51 west shut down genuinely upset me. I loved that venue. It wasn't the best but that venue was there for me. Open for smaller touring bands, let me do stand up, and a fun place to hang out. Fuck you if you rejoice in venues shutting down
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In a good mood.
Fav this and I'll tweet something nice about you.
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Yellowcard be like, "I Know A Place" off Ocean Avenue, and take you there to sit and talk
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If you dont say HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my 3 year old BEAN I will personally mention you in a letter to be found on my person upon my death
#HappyBirthdayBean
#Beanniversary
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[Chugs Mountain Dew while microwaving my balls on the Popcorn setting]
Just doing my part
Humans could become extinct if sperm counts in men continue to fall at current rates, researchers warn.
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Pepsi machine glitched on me using my card, charged me 37.50, hit cancel, nothing so I pushed the coin back button and well...
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[Breaking up with girlfriend]
Me: I just need some spacey.
Her: Don't you mean space?
Text from Kevin Spacey outside: Is it done?
Me: No
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@JohnWolfeYT
Counter offer what your current deal with them is and add on 10% more
Let the self bidding war begin
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I love that this year of
@dropout
is just
Let's let these folks do whatever the fuck they want
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Informed that today is World Compliment Day. Please like or reply for a compliment from me.
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Well....parents finally saw it and mom didnt cry this time, might as well show the rest of yall
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Kylee didnt want me to waste my 3 day pass at Disneyland cuz shes sick. So we decided I should go dressed as
@OkSteev
and take neutral photos around the park. Here's steev waiting for the shuttle
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I'm so glad this happened and made me grateful for the years I've spent making music
This is what its for
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twitter is 1000% the hardest platform to gain followers on
u either have to be genuinely funny, stupid hot, or steal tweets
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@peyssphoto
Client: "you took a lot more photos. Where are the rest?"
Me looking at test shots and her blinking: !??!?@?@?@?@?&=<$<4<$&÷__
#7
'he...gimme a sec
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Kinda hard to be stoked on it with recent events. But I got offered the promotion I interviewed for 2 weeks ago.
I start the March 16th :)
So private mode coming off soon
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Its 830 am. Passenger in truck behind us is fucking a blow up doll at a red light. Love it.
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Just saw Halloween
Crazy to think that dude that voiced Shrek is out there killing people and shit
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Got to see my best friend marry his new best friend and I'm so happy for them
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