I love going to football games but when it gets too cold and I stay home, but I still want the stadium experience, I turn down the heat to 66, charge myself $15 a beer and I piss in my sink.
@RCdeWinter
My doctor told me it wasn't unusual to get an erection during the exam. I said to the doctor, I don't have an erection, he said he wasn't talking about me.
@crimecontainer
@theliamnissan
Love Coach. He got me a great deal on a slightly pre owned Waterbed. Also the smartest guy I ever met,he has an IQ of 104, which is 4 points higher than perfection. He also has Unlimited Laser Printing Privileges if you ever need it.
@marzia75
@3YearLetterman
When Italy finally gets a good Italian restaurant like Olive Garden, I may consider visiting it. Yore most famous citizen, Christopher Columbus left Italy to find a city in Ohio. I wonder why.
@kaitlancollins
If there is Presidential Immunity. Joe should cancel the November election and stay president until he gives it to Kamala in 5-6 years.
@LuLu_Vue
What a Fn player. I could watch Caitlin play every day. I have absolutely no connection to Iowa, but if they lose, I will be super pissed all because of her.
@itsdaynapereira
I always thought that all the baseball stadiums had the number 42 hanging for Jackie Robinson. I just realized they were just getting prepared for today. Happy Birthday.
@RepJackKimble
I also did. Plus Margot Robbie,Dua Lipa, Heidi Klum and Gal Gadot. They may hurt now,but hopefully sometime in the future, they will realize it was for the best.
@3YearLetterman
@ResonantJustice
@DiscussingFilm
Coach, to be fair, a Youth Football Coach, is the highest paid profession in the world. So Im not sure you can understand the problems in Hollywood. Not one writer has a reserved table at Beef O'Brady's. Think about that, next time you judge.
@LimblessLust
@thadbrown7
Dane made 2 really big plays. He tackled a Dolphins receiver a half yard short of a first down, which resulted in a punt. Next series he knocked the ball away from a receiver, which resulted in a punt.
@carolynwiger
Congratulations on making the Final 3 but You should have won it. You're one of the coolest people I have ever seen. I'm sorry I won't see you on Wednesdays but Thank God for Twitter. Roll those eyes!
@vinquezada1
Never found Jim Carrey funny. Seth Rogan is good as a supporting actor,not as the main character. Farrell probably the funniest. Farley was great in Tommy Boy and Black Sheep.
@DougJBalloon
@SarahLarchmont
"Does President Biden have too much energy. When Biden makes sound decisions to help the American people,is it really good for America"
@upstatefederlst
Damn, I live in Buffalo, if I would have known that, I wouldn't have gone out last Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I thought I was only putting my Liver in danger.
@DeonteBanksMVP
@jasrifootball
@GiantInsider
I heard it was over, if they should order Blue Cheese or Ranch with their wings. Dabol is from Buffalo,he knows it's Blue cheese and Wink threw a hissy fit and left.
@DemiiVT
@catturd2
You mean the black officer who picked up 2 geese after they were hit by cars and the black American woman with the mental condition.
@bagsfan75_Tony
My wife and my New Year's Resolution was only to smoke after sex. I haven't had a cigarette all month, while my wife's up to 2 packs a day.
@DaltonRoss
@carolynwiger
Whoever chose Carolyn for this season of Survivor, needs to get a promotion and a big raise. Carolyn is the reason to watch this season.