My 12yo son has long, beautiful hair (about to his shoulders). The number of people who ask my husband & I "when are you gonna cut if off" just tells me how okay people are with casually violating childrens' bodily autonomy, especially in service of arbitrary gender norms.
Disabled person: "Hi, I'm having difficulty accessing this important aspect of society. Can we maybe work on that?"
People in the comments: "Have you considered simply...not participating in society??"
There are a number of foods I don't like. As an adult, I simply avoid them and choose to eat foods I DO like. If someone put a food in front of me that I don't like & told me to eat it, I would refuse. Most adults would. So why do we act like it's ridiculous to allow children to?
"My kids won't be racist because I don't teach them to be racist" is not enough. For one, you probably do in ways you're not aware of. Two, we live in a white supremacist society. They will see racism and racist messaging everywhere. You have to actively teach them anti-racism.
When I and other chronically ill folks say we have "fatigue", we don't mean we're a little sleepy. I mean I just walked up a half flight of stairs and collapsed on my bed, heart pounding, panting, and aching because my body *does not have the energy to move*.
Something you don't realize until you're burnt out from chronic illness/neurodivergence is how much energy even fun activities require. If I say I did nothing today, I mean I didn't even have the focus necessary to play a video game.
@AITA_reddit
Let's talk about the wife, bc
If you're a white person in an interracial relationship, it's 100% your responsibility to shield your SO from your family's racism & minimize their trauma as much as poss
I'm aghast that she said NOTHING at the time & then pressured OP to apologize
Why, in 2021, are teachers still not letting kids go to the bathroom on demand? 8yo said teachers give them a hard time like "you should've gone during lunch" and she was like "but you don't have to go at lunch because you're still eating. You have to go AFTER lunch." /1
*This* is why we say impact over intent. We are already seeing the harm from Sia's actions. She couldn't handle criticism from the community she claims to be advocating for, so she got defensive and turned them into the enemy, and then William Shitner felt the need to come to...
@vicstmichael
I think these tend to be the same people who post "jokes" about how lazy and incompetent husbands are like haha it's so cute how he doesn't do any household chores or raise the kids
Fat people have eating disorders too, and not just the ones you consider morally "bad", but the restrictive ones too. In fact, I'd go so far as to say we have them MORE, restricting just isn't considered disordered if you're fat, it's seen as the right thing to do.
My 12-year-old just came up to me with a can of tomato soup and the can opener and said he couldn't remember how to use the can opener. I want to tell you all what I did.
I showed him how to use the f*cking can opener.
The end.
Okay? So she's disabled AND anti-Black.
Do you advocate for & engage with the disabled community on a regular basis or only when you need a gotcha to absolve a white person of racism??
UPDATE: Remember the “Karen Goes Crazy” video 2 yrs ago where a woman lunged at a Nigerian woman at a mall and then began to break down? Remember how the internet made fun of this woman and called her a "Karen" endlessly?
It turns out that Abigail Elphick is disabled. She
People saying things TO DISABLED PEOPLE like "what if that worker is disabled too?" show me they have never spent more than ~5 mins actually engaging with the disabled community on this because we talk about disabled workers' rights ALL THE TIME
Your "good intentions" don't matter. You used your large platform to paint yourself as the victim and declared open season on us because you decided your perspective on our disability was the one the world needed and ours didn't matter. I will never forgive you for this.
Her rescue and has been verbally abusing and inciting harassment against autistic people. All because we wanted a voice in our own representation. I hope you're happy,
@Sia
, that you have caused autistic people significant, observable harm with your "love letter". This is why...
This trend of using "mental health" as a vague shield against accountability has got to fucking stop. I only ever see concern expressed for the mental health of perpatrators of oppression & harm and never for the marginalized people who were actually harmed. (1/2)
@robbysoave
Except that being vaccinated doesn't confer 100% immunity and you can still transmit the virus to others so no it's not, you sentient can of Axe
Which, yeah, that's how your GI system works. And then she was telling me that a kid asked to go in music class the other day and the teacher told them they had to hold it. Spoiler, they could not hold it. /2
Treating everyone like they're non-disabled until they prove otherwise is ableist.
Disabilities are variable. Stop making assumptions about what you think they should look like.
I would much rather have kids claiming they're disabled because it's "trendy" than any children not get the accomodations they need because of excess scrutiny.
Apparently my last post wasn't popular with everyone, but I will not waver on this issue. People with empathy can be abusive; people who can't feel empathy can be amazing people. It is not an inherently moral quality.
I've worked with people with neurotypicalism before and they're actually REALLY smart and they just inspire me every day. They have so many strengths! For example, they may be oblivious to sensory input but they're so good at inane small talk!
#NeurotypicalAwareness
Someone QRT'd this add unvaccinated people and...no, we're not gonna do that
If someone can't get vaccinated, they're disabled and this statement already applies to them
If they WON'T, they're a danger to disabled people, so those things are not morally equilvalent
About 26% of adults in the US are disabled. That means there's a 1 in 4 chance the person you're addressing is disabled. If you assume they're not and act accordingly, that's on YOU. And that's ableist.
It's funny that the anti-self diagnosis crowd thinks we watch one or two TikToks and then decide we're autistic because it's "cool"
When I was in denial about it for a solid few years 😂😂
Telling people to just go to a doctor/therapist because "staying broken is a choice" ignores the fact that many of us have seen multiple & ended up with significant trauma from it
Healthcare is ableist too
#DisabilityTwitter
#Disabled
#ActuallyAutistic
#NEISvoid
I see a lot of "self-diagnosis is valid because not everyone can get an official diagnosis" and I appreciate the sentiment but I think it misses the mark because not everyone WANTS a diagnosis and those people still deserve community support
Can I ask everyone to please stop using our perceived intelligence to assert the worth of autistics? It's a common refrain I hear from family members and caregivers, but it's harmful for a few reasons. First, the concept of intelligence is itself rooted in ableism, white (1/6)
@SFF_Writer_Dan
@josh_atf
This is true, but I think it still helps to debunk the notion that billionaires are somehow exceptional or got there solely on their own merit.
If you're talking about women, say women. If you're talking about people who menstruate, say people who menstruate. They are not interchangeable. This is not hard.
So many people view being called out on ableism as an attack and that makes disabled people the aggressors always. You need to start seeing the ABLEISM as the attack.
CW: Ableism
Just saw someone say "at least Biden can ride a bicycle" like can you please explain to me wtf that has to do with being President? My dyspraxic 11yo can't ride a bicycle either. Should I tell him that's a prerequisite if he ever wants to run for office?
If you're calling out people for using the r-slur and then using other words that mean the SAME THING and have also been used as slurs against ID/LD people, you're missing the point entirely.
Some of you also think you can just say the same thing as long as you don't use (1/2)
Often it also includes brain fog because I also don't have the energy to think.
I felt fine this morning and was able to accomplish a few things before fatigue hit me like a freight train.
@Maese_Leo
@ksorbs
I know the mail *seems* like it appears out of thin air, but there's actually this whole system called the USPS. You should look it up.
The "autism epidemic" very much reminds me of the "obesity epidemic" in that the criteria was changed to include more people, which turned into a moral panic because more people were suddenly autistic/"obese". But the people didn't change, the criteria did.
🧵Part of the problem, I think, is that white marginalized folks see all marginalizations as basically the same—and therefore interchangeable—and see "intersectionality" as these marginalizations stacking on top of one another like building blocks. (1/4)
@allisonpearson
I am disabled and caring for a disabled child during lockdown and it has never once crossed my mind to murder him. Stop spreading this harmful, ableist narrative. You are just paving the way for more disabled people to be killed.
That neurodivergent children are seen as a burden on their parents is exactly why abusive therapies persist despite ND adults' best efforts to end them.
It might be just "venting" to you but for us, it both evokes and directly contributes to the trauma we continually endure.
When you tell people "x isn't who you are/you don't have to make x your whole identity" all you're doing is telling people what identities you think are inherently negative
APA: "You probably shouldn't use ableist slurs in official publications anymore."
Ableds of Twitter: "WOW, maybe I should just STOP USING WORDS altogether since everyone is so OFFENDED by EVERYTHING nowadays!"
Me: "That would be lovely, thank you."
@chrissyteigen
You can forgive whoever you want but you don't get to tell the people that this kind of rhetoric actually harms that they have an obligation to forgive, too.
The thing is, autistic people with higher support needs & nonspeaking autistics absolutely ARE more marginalized than those of us perceived as high-functioning...but autism parents just use that to derail conversations because they aren't listening to those people either.
If someone tells you something is hurtful to disabled people and your response is that no disabled person has ever told you it's offensive
All you're saying is that disabled people don't feel safe around you 🤷♀️
@Maladroithe
I have family friends that are like this and the things they tell themselves to explain things is wild. They don't believe in fluoride, but of course that's not the reason for their child's severe tooth decay
@KaraLashbaugh
The fact that he built this entire relationship up with you in his mind when you had no control over the situation and were quite literally being paid to be polite is so alarming.
The actual words, but it's putting people down for what you perceive as lesser "intelligence" that's the ableist part. Confronting your own ableism isn't about just avoiding certain words, it's about adjusting your entire outlook. (2/2)
@JillFilipovic
The fact that you think the kid will care a whit for your assent is cute. We did baby-led weaning and exposed our daughter to all the foods we ate as an infant and now at 7 she has food aversions and she will eat "kid foods" or go hungry.