Tessa Profile Banner
Tessa Profile
Tessa

@tessiebabes

Followers
542
Following
398
Media
360
Statuses
5,287

u of u grad, emory bcdb, she/her

Joined January 2017
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
BYU's Office of Belonging sent a survey asking why I left. The options (among others) of "I no longer want to participate in the church" & "I no longer want to live by the honor code" seemed inadequate so under "Other" I put "abuse of power and disrespect of students' agency."🧵
34
49
1K
@tessiebabes
Tessa
3 months
@mimrebel I could not imagine being in a relationship with, let alone being MARRIED to, someone that bugged me so much that I felt the need to constantly complain about them. That’s wild.
2
6
792
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Hiya! @OaksDallinH I loved your quote today. "We stand up personally for those who are marginalized." Can you please tell my LGBTQ+ friends and family how you "stand up personally" for them? Lead by example and all that? Thanks!
11
59
722
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Shoutout to my old byu bishop who saw me falling apart during my faith crisis and told me to “go where you feel peace” and assured me he wouldn’t report me to the honor code office if that peace ended up being out of the church.
14
7
599
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
I finally told my parents I left the church and now I'm emotionally exhausted. Please send memes and pictures of your pets. Please and thank you.
193
3
528
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Saw a Mormon influencer’s TikTok responding to someone saying she’s in a cult. She looked up the definition of cult and said, “well if that’s a cult, every religious organization is a cult.” Lmao
24
16
503
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
People dismiss BYU as not representative of the church, but I disagree. BYU is a microcosm of the church. It's representative of what the church would be if it had the same power over all its members that it does over the ones at BYU.
11
43
506
@tessiebabes
Tessa
11 months
My Australian lds coworker found out I transferred from byu and proceeded to bare her soul to me about her spiritual promptings. Her (after talking for half an hour): so why did you transfer from byu? Me: I left the church. Her: 🦗🦗🦗
5
2
465
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
How am I supposed to put my mission on my resume?
Tweet media one
41
14
454
@tessiebabes
Tessa
3 months
The general Relief society president says she’s so happy she didn’t wait to have kids. She had her first kid a year AFTER graduating from law school. I don’t think she should be telling newly wed 20 year old girls in undergrad that they shouldn’t wait. It’s. Not. The. Same.
33
28
452
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
My most BYU story was in Eternal Families. The prof said lgbtq ppl struggle with why God gave them that mortal challenge. A bi kid commented, “no, we struggle with why God’s prophets don’t respect who He made us to be.” The prof said “no” & equated gayness to disease/disability.
@Swilua
🌈Dr. Frizzle
1 year
the most BYU story I have is probably that time I broke up with my fiancé in April and in August he married another girl with our temple appointment
178
175
7K
10
19
444
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
The fact that so many people don't see any issue with how BYU exerts its power over students and employees goes to show just how comfortable members are with their church dictating their lives. It's the norm.
31
16
411
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
When it asked me to expand, I explained that holding students' education hostage with church activity is an abuse of power and that that disrespect of my agency and evolving beliefs did not help when I was desperately looking for ways to stay in the church.
4
3
344
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
A good person realized he was part of a harmful system. He used his voice to push for change & was punished for it (excluded from meetings, etc). He left when he saw he didn't have the power to make a tangible difference. Why are y'all mad at him? @EliMcCann
5
6
317
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
As a teenager, I answered this & told my bishop I supported gay marriage & my lgbtq loved ones. He said, “oh, I think that’s a little different than what this is asking.” I asked how & he said it was complicated but that I should just say “no” when asked this. So I did. For years
Tweet media one
14
8
300
@tessiebabes
Tessa
3 years
Why don't I ever get interviewed by the guys on tiktok going around byu campus asking students what their favorite swear word is?
8
4
299
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
No one should have to do that and I said I'm very disappointed in BYU for abusing its power and putting students in that position. I made it clear the options given in the survey greatly oversimplify people's reasons for leaving and absolve BYU of any responsibility.
3
3
290
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
I was able to transfer schools and take the consequent financial, social hits, etc. but not everyone is so lucky. I explained that I have friends at BYU suffering through panic attacks at church (and worse) just to maintain ecclesiastical endorsements & get an education.
1
5
283
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
The new reqs for BYU employees reflect that same abuse of power. I find it concerning that, where it has the most influence, the church holds careers and education hostage to control its members.
3
7
279
@tessiebabes
Tessa
4 months
The only thing I’ll say about the furry protests is this: my friend teaches at that school and there are no furries. This situation is born from 12 yo kids lying for attention and their non critically thinking parents believing them completely and losing their minds.
22
12
271
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Isn't it funny that I'll make the exact same criticisms of the church/byu that I did when I was in, but now that I'm out, I instantly lose all credibility??
7
13
262
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
I was just invited to church and was told I'd get treats. No hard feelings at all, it's just funny that leaving was the hardest decision I've ever made and they think some treats can get me back.
18
8
250
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
My bestie is getting sealed tomorrow & her little sister just found out she can’t go (too young). She said, “what do I have to do to go in? I’ll do it!” Heartbreaking. So I’ll be hanging out with her outside the temple while her whole family gets to attend her sister’s wedding.
22
1
219
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
I finally figured out why the sudden switch from saying Mormon to tcojcolds bugs me beyond the obvious reasons, like how ridiculous it is. The "I am a Mormon" campaign made me so proud of my religion/heritage. Being "Mormon" was my whole identity and I was so proud of the title.
10
11
202
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
I had a class assignment to interview someone who has left the church and it was great. We need more dialogue like that. Anything y'all would want me to say in class tomorrow when we discuss it?
31
3
198
@tessiebabes
Tessa
4 months
I’m excited to announce I’m going to Emory! I’ve been accepted into the Biochemistry, Cell, and Developmental Biology program and will start my PhD this fall.
Tweet media one
22
4
180
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Someone recently asked why I don’t like OUR & wanted evidence. Me: *gives evidence from investigative journalists & anti trafficking experts* Her: so are you just seeing this on social media or do you actually know these people? My friend works for OUR so I know you’re wrong.
12
7
175
@tessiebabes
Tessa
10 months
I don’t understand epidural shaming & I’ve had one for non childbirth reasons. Why pressure ppl into giving birth w/out pain management just bc it’s “unnatural?” Would you tell any other kind of patient to go w/out pain management? Why tell anyone to feel more, unnecessary pain?
13
5
173
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
So funny that most lds people will look at Samuel Bateman & be horrified. But what did he do? He claimed he was a prophet, started a religion & married 20+ women/girls (many under 15 yo). But when Joseph Smith does the same thing & is arrested for it, it’s undeserved persecution?
14
5
158
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Mormon gym bro bragging about how much sex he gets... from his wife... that he's married to...
16
0
157
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Question: does the church make middle aged men in positions of authority outside the church feel more entitled to knowing peoples' personal lives? Especially young adults? Why do I feel like I'm often interrogated by middle aged mormon men?
15
2
147
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
I hung out with a TBM friend who hasn’t asked why I left or said anything churchy since. We went shopping so obviously garments came up. She said she’s so glad I’m not antagonistic about it. Girl, you would lose your shit if I actually spoke my mind or you saw my Twitter.
4
0
146
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
My sophomore year we had a class debate on marijuana legalization. I had to argue for it & felt guilty for arguing against my religion. Then I saw the arguments & evidence & I was like, "huh, I think my religion might be wrong on this." & then felt guilty for even thinking that.
8
1
144
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Some elders on my mission taught a couple that lived together but weren’t married. They tried to get them to get married or move out & finally resorted to a detailed, bloody description of the atonement & asked them why they continued to make Christ suffer.
13
4
146
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Last night I told another close childhood friend that I left the church and I was ready to answer questions and have a good conversation but her response? Dead silence. I should’ve known.
20
0
141
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
They told this story in a district meeting and everyone thought they were so badass, but that level of manipulation was just icky.
1
2
138
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
We’re married!
Tweet media one
19
2
136
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Everytime I start thinking someone from my mission might have left the church, they post a picture of the temple.
12
0
136
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
"Leave the church alone." Oh ok, am I supposed to pretend it doesn't exist now and completely ignore my background and heritage? Or pretend that devoting everything to it didn't affect me at all or shape who I am today? Ok cool. I'll just do that.
7
8
126
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
When I started doing baptisms for the dead, I didn’t know that attending the temple while menstruating was frowned upon (at least in my ward). When someone told me my period made me “unclean” I was confused & horrified. But the scriptures said similar things & I trusted my leader
13
0
116
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
I trusted this man (he was awesome) and believed he had the power of discernment so I assumed I just didn’t have the understanding he did. But now I think he just didn’t want to take a temple recommend away from a 16 year old Molly Mormon🤷‍♀️
4
0
114
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
It's funny when exmos say, "I was never taught xyz" & mos say, "everyone knows xyz. You didn't pay attention" because what the church says about xyz is never the full story. Mos think they know all the history, but they don't. It's expertly spun & presented to favor the church.
8
5
112
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
In his thread he said people would get mad at him for his time at Kirton. I naively thought people were better and more nuanced than that. But now he gets the heat and the church yet again escapes accountability. Let's not lose focus here.
0
0
113
@tessiebabes
Tessa
4 months
Has anyone else heard this?? I always had a list of questions for general conference and was taught that if I was in tune with the spirit, every question would be answered. I watched conference with a journal out and eyes glued to the tv yet never received all the answers.
40
1
112
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Besides, on those calls he did what he could for the victim, not the abuser. He advised reporting. Do you think he made a difference for the victims of those cases? I do. If a bishop calls the line, wouldn't you want him to talk to someone like Eli? I would.
1
0
111
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
When your mission trainee who practically worshiped you sees your TikTok about leaving the church but she doesn’t speak English so she just comments saying you’re beautiful😬
6
0
105
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
And with David Archuleta's recent news: After everything he did for the church, giving it good press, abandoning his music career at its peak to serve a mission, etc. All of that means NOTHING now that he's stepped away. And members are SO quick to vilify him.
1
0
100
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@LDSssTeacher Love this thread. Mormons really are amazing people and are so kind, especially individually. But I spent so long correcting homophobic comments and fighting against the collective head-in-the-sand mentality. It was exhausting. Ultimately, it all just didn’t align with my values.
3
1
102
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Exmos, help me find the journal of that pioneer woman who looked over slc for the first time and wrote about how she felt trapped and feared for her daughters. Anyone know her name? I read an excerpt ages ago and can’t find the source now.
1
1
102
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
I do not understand how some grown ass exmos can harass and THREATEN an 18 year-old girl and her family just bc she said something naive on TikTok. I think a lot of exmos forget that the vast majority of lds creators are gen z, many of which are literal TEENAGERS in high school.
9
3
101
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
@NateForUtah @AshleyBK7 When I played high school sports we had to get a yearly physical where the dr would ask these questions. Valid reason to track that information, but it should definitely stay between patient and dr, not on a random signup form.
3
1
102
@tessiebabes
Tessa
10 months
@chronicallybeee As someone who researches antibiotic resistance in E. coli, all the time. Every day. Super bugs are terrifying
0
3
96
@tessiebabes
Tessa
4 months
This reminded me of the time at girls camp that a very prominent speaker sent us into the woods to have our own Enos/sacred grove experience. They promised we’d receive answers from God (if we were righteous) & told us not to come back until we did. I cried out there for ages.
@tessiebabes
Tessa
4 months
Has anyone else heard this?? I always had a list of questions for general conference and was taught that if I was in tune with the spirit, every question would be answered. I watched conference with a journal out and eyes glued to the tv yet never received all the answers.
40
1
112
10
0
97
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
@FailedLDSWoman The rules haven’t changed, but gen z is interpreting them differently. The endowment says to wear the garments “throughout your life” & gen z is starting to take that less as “night & day” & more like “wear them to church & the temple.” They see the specifics more as guidelines🤷‍♀️
3
0
93
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@cloumeau The tithing subsidy didn't do much for me bc I had a full scholarship that would've covered tuition whether it was $3,000 or $10,000. But I partly agree with you. Cheap tuition can be worth enduring dumb rules for some. BUT, giving low tuition doesn't excuse mistreating students.
2
0
92
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
So now when teenage girls on tiktok talk about how it's derogatory and a win for satan, it feels like a personal insult. They're saying that the "spirit" I felt every time I saw one of those ads was deception and not real. It's dismissive and invalidating of my experience.
1
0
89
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Entering my relief society era.
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Yeah sex is great, but have you ever been one of multiple people to bring cookies to an event and everyone raves about yours and wants the recipe?
3
0
42
2
3
92
@tessiebabes
Tessa
3 years
There is so much covid fatigue but I hate the "Let everyone get it and be done" idea. ~5% of 20-30 yrs olds get long covid lasting a month+. Fatigue, headaches, loss of taste/smell, shortness of breath, cough, etc. That's theoretically >1,600 BYU students.
5
7
87
@tessiebabes
Tessa
11 months
Great thread. It’s so funny that the current excuse for not ordaining women is that we are inherently more righteous than men & they need the power/leadership roles to catch up bc that means every lds woman is more righteous than Rusty. So why the hell would we listen to him?
@thebookofevan
thebookofevan
1 year
Quick story.. About 5 yrs ago I was active, no doubts/no shelf, was serving in a bishopric, reading scriptures, listening to GC talks, temple attending every month, fhe, (all the check boxes, while knowing that the boxes are “looking beyond the mark”) *Cue the gaslighters* 1/
21
4
206
9
3
86
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
The pride I felt saying, "I am a Mormon" is dismissed because it's inconvenient and doesn't follow the current narrative. It's just a hurtful reminder that because I left, all of my experiences with the church (even the good ones) are no longer valid in members' eyes.
1
0
75
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
I recently hung out with my old byu study abroad group & they’ve finally started piecing together that I’m exmo. I lost count of the number of times I caught someone staring at me with a concerned look. Can’t we just have fun catching up without worrying about my salvation?
6
2
77
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
When I tell you I gave that man a SCALDING review and reported him to the religion department…
2
0
77
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
DMBA WILL NOW COVER BIRTH CONTROL I REPEAT DMBA WILL NOW COVER BIRTH CONTROL
3
5
78
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
I don't think that would hurt so much if it weren't for the fact that like 90% of the people I love are TBMs and I know many of them think this way. Anyway, thanks for letting me rant, everyone:)
1
0
76
@tessiebabes
Tessa
10 months
@DeMercy_ @joshloeser Yes! I asked if I could go without a blood transfusion since I felt fine and my dr said “yeah, no problem. If you start feeling bad we’ll do it.” Then everyone else who came in asked if I was a JW since I refused it. No? I felt ok so I just postponed an unnecessary procedure?
0
0
76
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Tbm friend didn’t think that having sex for the first time could be anything but uncomfy, nerve-wracking, painful and/or scary for girlies in cis/het relationships. Fun? Pleasurable? Never. The law of chastity & purity culture just aren’t good for the cishet girlies (or anyone)
3
2
73
@tessiebabes
Tessa
11 months
I just think it’s funny that “prophet” and “profit” are homophones.
10
5
73
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Another byu story was when I dated a guy who liked my ambition but wanted a SAH wife and would initiate make outs then blame me for tempting him.
3
0
72
@tessiebabes
Tessa
11 months
A mission comp was studying about heavenly mother & was frustrated she couldn’t find much. She asked our mission pres & he said “all of HF’s attributes are HM’s as well.” My comp felt guilty about not being content with that answer. She just wanted to be close to her HM.
12
1
72
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@WholesomeMeme As God intended
1
0
69
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
I loved my mission, but whenever I start thinking that it wasn’t traumatic, I remember when I broke my finger & felt so disgusted and guilty at the thought of doing something as selfish as seeing a dr that I didn’t say anything & it hurt for weeks and healed weird.
2
0
68
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
It felt so icky being praised for not being the angry exmo. Like, “sure your entire worldview collapsed & you were betrayed by those you trusted most, but if you’re not indifferent about it, I’m offended & you’re persecuting me.”
1
0
66
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
I was only 12 and had been taught weirder spiritual things than that so I believed it. I felt so guilty about having gone to the temple while on my period until I asked my mom about it and she assured me it wasn’t true. Thank god for my secretly progmo mom.
0
1
67
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@brettross6 @liminal_lds I love that even after that whole thread about women being penalized for men's actions you say she's the one who needs to learn her lesson. You kinda missed the point, bud..
3
0
67
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@TweetsOfCats Two very different cats
0
1
62
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Why is this girl passing out BoMs on the bus and talking about the restoration? Pls no, girl you're embarrassing yourself.
9
1
63
@tessiebabes
Tessa
3 years
@calvinjburke Could you imagine if we all did this until women are given the priesthood and gay couples are married in the temple?!
4
0
63
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@ZOOBapologist @BYUParody Hello! 🙋🏼‍♀️ hi, I think they're hilarious.
3
0
61
@tessiebabes
Tessa
21 days
@madihawes It’s so bad at byu! And on my mission it was horrifying how other missionaries would talk about Bolivians. Ew ew ew
3
1
61
@tessiebabes
Tessa
3 months
Lds coworker despises door-to-door sales, saying it’s manipulative and disrespectful. Doesn’t see any issue with lds missions. Felt like a Mormon Onion moment irl. @LdsAccidentally
3
2
62
@tessiebabes
Tessa
10 months
Throwback to earlier this year. Allergist: you’re allergic to every plant we tested AND you’re allergic to cats. I’m surprised you don’t have more symptoms. *it slowly dawns on me that constant itchiness, stuffy nose, runny nose, etc. are, in fact, NOT completely normal.*
1
1
59
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@LDSdiscussions Even if there was no evidence to prove the book of mormon false and this was the only strike against Smith, I do not want to be a part of a religion (or worship a god) who's prophet would use such coercive, predatory tactics on a vulnerable teenager.
2
2
59
@tessiebabes
Tessa
4 months
I tweeted about not getting answers to questions during genconf & I love that the lds response ranged from “well I got my answers so you’re doing something wrong” to “that isn’t true, I’ve never heard that” to one troll calling me a c*nt. Being off private is wild😂
18
0
60
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Apparently Elder Holland told John Dehlin that he was wanted/needed in the church but "just don't go out and buy a printing press" You can believe whatever you want in the church, you just can't voice it if it's against the status quo. That's not ok.
7
1
57
@tessiebabes
Tessa
3 months
A girl on ig said “NO PROPHET, TEACHING, BOOK, ETC HAS EVER SAID STAY AWAY FROM EX MORMONS” What are your fav lds messages that distance exmos? “Stop increasing your doubts by rehearsing them with other doubters” & “never take counsel from those who don’t believe” come to mind
9
1
58
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
When your cat has zero survival instincts.
Tweet media one
Tweet media two
5
2
58
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
I’m not surprised about the homophobic language being put back into the honor code. What I am surprised about is that beards are still banned. Really?
12
0
55
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
I cannot stress this enough. ONE ANECDOTE IS NOT CONCLUSIVE EVIDENCE.
0
1
54
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@NateForUtah @JonathanRees17 POWERFUL statement. Thank you, Ari. I’m so sorry this is even happening. 🏳️‍⚧️❤️
0
2
48
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
CW: sexual violence I had a church lesson where the woman taught that “no matter how tired you are, you HAVE to give your husband sex every night bc he needs it to stay righteous.” I was 15. That teaching is coercive af & doesn’t give wives a choice in the matter. That’s r*pe.
@LisaandJim1
Lisa and Jim
1 year
@AnnLindberg5 i have never heard a church teach that you should put up with being raped and abused physically most will help you find a place to stay and give you what you need to help you escape that.
28
0
9
6
2
52
@tessiebabes
Tessa
4 months
Just overheard some girls invite their study group member to general conference and he was like, “thaaaaanks but I have plans.”
9
1
53
@tessiebabes
Tessa
4 months
Since we’re talking about garments, one time I started dating this feminist guy. When I told my friend, her response was, “but does he wear his garments? You need to break up with him if he doesn’t.” I beg your finest pardon????? Anyway, I married him & she disapproves.
1
0
53
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@MindyGledhill @esherhouse I can't help but laugh when people say that leaving is "taking the easy way out" because this is the hardest, bravest thing I've done.
3
3
49
@tessiebabes
Tessa
10 months
@Swilua Just saw this on another thread😂
Tweet media one
1
0
49
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
@KimmyMonte My great aunt’s husband was a hitman and she didn’t tell anyone until he died. She found out when they were on a walk and he grabbed her arm, told her not to react, and then shot a man as he passed by.
2
0
48
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@sarahtilton_ Jasmine and Mulan. Uhm OKAY. And I thought I just wanted a tiger like Jasmine.
1
0
48
@tessiebabes
Tessa
1 year
Pros of having only non Mormon coworkers: inappropriate jokes, getting beers, coffee hour, saying “fuck” Cons: no more religious jokes.
Tweet media one
4
0
47
@tessiebabes
Tessa
7 years
When older generations think we millennials just use our phones to waste time on social media. Thread.
1
5
47
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
@gbluesman @planetJoseph If anyone were to resign it should be white players. Racism isn't a problem for POC to fix. It's white people's problem and we need to fix it.
3
0
46
@tessiebabes
Tessa
2 years
Maybe if I just watch new girl and take a nap my test will magically get done and I'll get an A.
0
3
45