Lumi
@saintLumy
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Pinned Tweet
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A lot of my opinions, much like yours, are affected by the reality of our experience. The environment where we are brought up determines our outlook on too many of life’s issues.
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Two regular lies women tell;
Their love for clingy men and their love for expressive men
If you fall for either or both, and don’t regret it, call me bastard
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Women fit make you craze
I don’t like solution-oriented people. They lack affection. Sometimes you just want a big hug instead of solutions.
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Nothing sexy about it. It’s something basic. You know, just as cooking is a basic survival skill, so is a woman having her own money.
What’s sexy about putting food on your own table?
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So person fit do all these things fully-clothed? I never knew
This Yogi loves backbends and inversions.
Well, I’m taking more regular pictures this year (even though it’s 1 out of 50).
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Women are responsible for young men engaging in cyber crime and fraud
"Men responsible for increased rate of ladies doing butt enlargement" – Influencer, Caramel plug
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My classmate for secondary school dey celebrate 7th wedding anniversary.
7th bruhhhh !!!!
I dey here still dey enter dm, hey God 😭😭
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Why? You wan come thief am?
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The heartbreak reach one stage, I break my sim go buy another line. Two days later, na me call her say “this is my new number”
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Shola dey craze. Good morning queen pls dm your account details
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As two people don build film villages now, una wan take village film kee us
The revolution begins. Your first look at Lísàbí: The Uprising, coming to Netflix September 27 🪓
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Says the people that go on multiple dates on the same day
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Flashed my babe around 11pm to keep her awake for xtra cool as usual. This girl picked call for one second, checked my balance and it was 99 naira.
Jumped fence to go buy airtime.
In the process of jumping fence on my return, vigilantes caught me and handed me over to police
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I’m sorry but e dey hard for man to be on the receiving end of kindness from women.
Any small kindness laidis, you fit begin reason plenty things
The barest minimum will move a lot of men, yet, it’s hard to come by.
Men dey suffer onG
Gokada rider tried for me today so I sent more than his fee and also sent credit God abeg. 😭
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Why’re you living on the mainland and attending church on the island?
Are you mad? Did they use suffer to swear for you?
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“how poor man wan take explain say him get good intentions”
Hello ma
@lollizlee
Anon has opened a 250,000 tab for you for your birthday ma’am
Please kindly check your dms for more information 🙏🏽🙏🏽
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The power of social media is for everyone. Since these drivers started making recordings of their encounters with problematic riders, people’s mindsets have begun to change.
And for the record, we’re yet to see any case where the problematic rider is male.
How do u guys request for a ride knowing that your'e not the one paying and you yourself don't even av money to pay🤨 like Idg what if the person meant to pay can't pick up call or his or her phone got spoilt🤷♂️. How do u intend to pay the driver
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Na this kain picture Sars see for my phone wey I spend 4 hours for Oluyole police station dey chop slap cos I no gree tell them where I keep the rifle and other weapons
For my next birthday, I want a McMillan TAC-50 😍
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Won ta spaghetti 1k e tun pe anon. Aye yin baje ni? E fe pa ketekete ni
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I see some of you wailing about Ghana being visa free to Dubai and dragging Nigeria.
Ghanaians did not use fake COVID result to travel to Dubai.
Ghanaians are not cultists killing people and causing unrest in a peaceful nation.
On this one, Buhari isn’t the problem but us.
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The people I pity the most on this app are the young ones in their formative years who absorb a lot of the information here.
They’re incapable of filtering information and unable to distinguish actual right from wrong.
I fear for what/how they’ll turn out to be.
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Since the day police stop me for my junction and drag me go my house say dem wan search and I ask for search warrant and dem bring out signed warrant with empty details and dem begin fill in my details for my front, na that day i know say the police force dey irredeemable
Good evening
@BenHundeyin
My friend
@Ade_authority
is currently detained at Bariga Police Station because she called Naija Hair Factory out for bad service provided to her. Your officers have refused to release her and your number has not been reachable. Your intervention is
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Making toxicity and manipulation look cute is psychopathic behavior
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Once your partner goes for nysc in a different state, forget about them
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Sometimes, women suppose dey understand when their men cheat
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We were already dating sef. I saw her writing down the names and numbers of every female in my contact list. She said she wanted to call them to warn them or something
Bruhhh I almost ran mad
Men. Reply with some of the reasons you stopped talking to a lady you were interested in:
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You can reach out to me only when you need help and go straight to the point and I’ll come through if I can
I don’t want that faux friendship or conversation people try to have
Don’t text or call to check up on me. I don’t want that shii
Don’t reach out to me only when you need help. I don’t remember people exist only when I need them to help me.
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The day a girl came to spend the night at my place and rolled out her bedspread and pillow case the following morning to make videos to send to her man so he’d think she was home was the day I lost hope in Nigerian women.
I’ve seen worse since tho
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See the way Sabinus is carrying his guys. He features them in his skits and also features in their skits
No wonder they’re all grateful to him. Top lad.
If na some of una, we sabi wetin una go don do
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This thing men dey put women on monthly salary, na out of love or na cos dem dey date broke women?
Na just one of the many things wey no make sense to me.
And that girlfriend proposal shii. Lol that shii dumb af in my books, from the explanation I got sha
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My own is how someone else has so much control over you or your life.
If they’re in a good mood, you are. If they’re in a bad mood, you are.
One phone call or text from them can change your entire mood or day.
That’s too much power for one to wield.
When you love someone, you’ll just wake up one day and realize that you no longer have sense. Fiam! You’re just senseless.
You won’t even feel the sense leaving your body, you’d only realize it after the deed has been done.
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Shebi some of you say it’s toxic pussy that’s the sweetest.
Lmaoooooo make una dey enjoy dey go
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@mrmanhere_
@ovie_joshua
E get one babe we dey talking stage that time. As she come my house see my shoes, she chook leg inside say we be same size. Na so she say “Ope o” I just dey look say about this one dey craze ni
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Na because of you I dey go alausa today. You must do account of every kobo
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One of the security officers at work got promoted to customer service officer today.
He’s had a bsc all along but he’s been a security officer.
It may not be much, but his life just got better and I’m absolutely elated for him.
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@Tunde_OD
Guy this thing you dey do. No man can repay you.
Your descendants will reap from it for many many decades
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You’re doing ‘women support women’ challenge but you’re fucking your friend’s husband. Let’s hear word, abeg.
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So if we get dick appointment, I go send you money first? Money for wetin?
Like wetin I go put for narration for my bank app cos my oga go ask me later
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I was there. First time I tasted it I wanted to remove my tongue
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I’m an attention-whore. If you don’t talk to me in the space of 2 hours, I’ll assume the relationship is over
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Hope you’re telling the men that will buy rams for their girlfriends’ families the same thing
Going to do olopo work for una boyfriend family house during Ileya doesn't guarantee that he's going to marry you.
Respect yourself pls and enjoy with your family
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If 2023 meet you for this country, anything ur eyes see, make u collect
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We know a lot of the population don’t earn up to 100k monthly but you people are saying people should save in dollars
The way you people conveniently become unrealistic when tweeting dey always murd me.
Like are we not in the same country together?
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If person no rate you, you go know. We need to stop turning blind eyes to reality and face it instead.
I know it’s hard but we need to try.
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@BundayyO
I don’t have a personal relationship with my work colleagues outside the office.
I was ill few weeks ago. This female colleague called me twice to check up on me.
Lmao aswear I almost begin reason one or two 😂
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Hope you people are seeing I dinnor join you to drag Saga o, cos the day the things I did for love will leak, you will not say “and the weyrey was dragging Saga o”
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Lmaooooooo you want make crime rate increase?
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Flying from anywhere to anywhere in the world?
We offer the cheapest prices you won’t get anywhere else.
We also assist with securing visas to top destinations, hotel reservations, airport transfer, etc
We offer everything you need for a splendid travel experience
Send a DM!
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Omo if vendors tell us say knacks go dey involved, to pay for delivery no go hard again o
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I’m sorry but I’ve listened to Buju’s EP like mad. I listen at least 5 times daily. I love it 😭
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My friend relocated to Canada last week. His first pictures just dropped on my WhatsApp now and I feel really good.
One by one, we go dey comot. Those of you that want to stay and rebuild, Godspeed.
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If I got married today and 72 hours later, my wife is on the internet dictating to a stranger what to do in their relationship, I’d be asking myself “what did I marry?”
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Someone said we’re still yet to hear the worst stories about the type of racism that took place long ago and I’m very much inclined to believe them
Aborigines in Australia were classified as animals until 1960 when they became accepted as humans.
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Person check him partner phone see say dem dey take am fi idiat, una dey blame am for snooping.
GPY !
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I know this man from my time at a bank at Adeola Odeku. Mans always has a smile on and is very respectful. He never gave us problems even when we had multiple issues at the branch.
Happy birthday to such a wonderful being. May his days be long and fruitful.
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@BundayyO
@TheAjibolaGrey
Guy for company I do my IT, my oga look me one day tell me say “you’re the worst intern we’ve had in the history of this company”.
I put in so effort much not to laugh on the spot
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If 2023 meet you for this country, anything your eyes see make you take an like that
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Person go dey go through hard times for this life but e go come twitter come dey tweet “Lmaoooooo “ God abeg
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@Nurse_Chocs
@phunky___
@phunkeyfunny
@SmithAangdu
@odion_peters
@iamvictor__
@akreana_
All time fav
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I will never be in support of this thing.
This is saying basic human decency should be defenestrated in order to score cheap points in an argument.
Maybe if it’s in retaliation of something in the same degree, I could understand but how do we measure these things?
You guys don’t get it.
You can’t come for someone and dictate how they should react.
You can punch someone and they can retaliate by hitting you with a baseball bat.
Na you start am first, anything you see take it like that.
Better not to start what you can’t finish.
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@EquitableNiklas
@the_chiomz
If you’re sick, go to the hospital. Consultation isn’t free, neither is medical advice.
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Person wey get original plaque and recognition no use military protection
It feels so good to hold it I remember seeing a photoshopped picture of myself pointing at it and I said to God will have an original and he did it congratulations to all of us this is a collective win thank you all so much for your continuous love and support ❤️
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@jadorechrista
@Falilatt_
Some of you are just too problematic. Run your house the way you want and let others do the same
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150k is arguably the average salary of a 9-5er in Lagos. 10k is 2 full days’ pay. That is, someone worked for 2 days and they didn’t touch their earnings but gave it to you.
It’s that money you’re saying they should beg you to manage. Not arguing if they can spoil you or not
why are you trying to spoil someone with 10k? Let’s be honest guys really. What can 10k do rn? emefiele Naira oh, Aren’t you guys in the same economy with us? Imo it should be worded ‘please help me manage this 10k’ or just send it home and stop the big man attitude.
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@iyaboawokoya
@woye1
After all this time, you’re still shameless. You’re irredeemable at this point. Tueh
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I know we’re all ‘good’ people but if ur partner offends u and you’re giving them silent treatment, you’re emotionally abusing them and you’re not a saint as u claim or think.
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Omo if they didn’t/don’t propose to you this year, your behavior is very bad and you’re on a long thing
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