Pimlico Journal
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Right-wing thought from the London Scene 🇬🇧 // Vol. X out July 2024 // DMs open for pitches 📬
London, United Kingdom
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Pinned Tweet
Pimlico Journal, Volume X (July 2024), out soon.
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Extraordinary set of tweets, wrong in too many ways to count.
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Our election day performance:
1. We predicted Reform would get four seats, and chose which four correctly. This wasn’t very challenging — we just chose the obvious ones.
The other Lincolnshire and Essex seats seemed just a bit too traditionally ‘Tory’ for Reform to win.
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Five more years of the media pretending Starmer isn’t an awful, boring speaker with terrible delivery.
That was a good start for Starmer. The handshakes and flags were warm but not overly jubilant. Then a crisp, well-delivered speech. Not everyone will love it, but he's had a smooth first few minutes in Downing Street.
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It is widely agreed that time spent in a classroom is a good thing and we should facilitate more of it. This is mostly wrong and the right should stand against education in almost all forms. Here’s our latest on education:
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NEW ‘While French fashion adapted to changing social attitudes, British fashion – at least high fashion – remained steadfast in its commitment to classic menswear. Even to this day, formal British menswear is as it was eighty years ago…
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NEW: ‘From 1337 to 1453, England found itself, in a fit of absence of mind, conquering an empire in France.’
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NEW: What sort of person was elected as a Labour MP last Thursday?
In this article, Pimlico Journal takes a first look at ten members of this gang of incompetents, ghouls, and extremists.
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Our correspondent has been spotted.
Glastonbury article out next month!
Lads in the text next to me talking about voting reform...you are at fucking GLASTONBURY 😭
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@HCH_Hill
We have an FPTP system and there’s no state money for an alternative baseline. Quite happy to roll the dice to create one given that Britain is rather more important than the origins of the war in Ukraine.
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Are you Smarter Than a 10 Year Old, was the premise of a real TV show in which many 10 year olds did not lose. People’s retention from education is atrocious. Nobody seems bothered by this but the millions hours of time are still wasted on it rather than leisure or work.
It is widely agreed that time spent in a classroom is a good thing and we should facilitate more of it. This is mostly wrong and the right should stand against education in almost all forms. Here’s our latest on education:
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The Leeds riot wasn’t even an inter communal race riot. Unless integration is now just a synonym for not being badly behaved squawking about ‘integration’ makes you the grifter here.
Yes, we have issues with community cohesion and integration, but the glee with which some right-wing accounts are reporting last night's events in Leeds is vile and counterproductive.
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Corbynites tried to poll the seat and couldn’t find a Corbyn win. Nobody has a good understanding of ethnic minority voting networks when independent candidates are in play. Doesn’t seem anyone can poll them accurately.
Read the New Statesman for insightful political analysis.
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Starmer’s Britain
Fires still going
Police nowhere to be seen
They have time to arrest autistic children for offending police officers tho
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NEW: Editor-in-chief Nigel Forrester makes the case for the introduction of a British version of the SAT (as found in the United States), alongside A-Levels, arguing that it would be an essential tool for monitoring universities and promoting meritocracy.
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3. The Muslim bloc vote. In some ways, this was a big win for us — we just didn’t pick the right seats, with Yakoob losing in Birmingham Ladywood. We were right in expecting Galloway to lose, though it was closer than we thought.
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The truth is that although our general sense that there would be mass defections of Muslims to the Greens, independents, and the Workers Party was correct, we — and indeed analysts more generally — just don’t know enough about what is going on in these seats.
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Why Dewsbury, but not Bradford West, for instance? Why Birmingham Perry Barr, but not Ladywood (which outwardly seems more favourable to this sort of politics)?
There is probably some randomness to this, and some very specific local networks which are impenetrable to outsiders.
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We did note down Barnsley, and that the ‘Red Wall’ remained something of a mystery this election (given how little of it was fought there). We were right not to expect any Reform gains there, though.
We thought reform would do better in Basildon and Billericay and Castle Point.
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New: Our Glastonbury guide. Music, tips for visiting, and all the demographic observations you would hope for.
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2. Of the Tory leadership contenders, we correctly predicted that Mordaunt would lose her seat, but wrongly predicted that Jenrick would lose his.
We didn’t predict that either Tanner or Truss would lose, but we did say it would be close.
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NEW: Our guide to the General Election of 2024 is now out.
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Your fondest memories of school likely have absolutely nothing to do with time spent learning about covalent bonds, your university lectures are likely totally forgotten. This is stolen wasted time from which we ought to liberate future generations.
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Starmer’s 34% probably did not beat Reform+Lib Dem+Green+Muslim independents. The plurality of the votes were protests.
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This guy is working legally. Absolutely insane this is how he spends his time.
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‘Edward III went to war not to seize the Crown of France, but in pursuit of total legal supremacy… The war was not caused, as Shakespeare’s Henry V gives the impression, by a sort of proto-rigmarole about the proper application of the Salic Law. This was not a dynastic dispute.’
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Starmer’s Britain.
Just watched people setting a bus on fire in Leeds on Tiktok live
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We also identified Leicester East as a venue for a potential upset, had Jeremy Corbyn on ‘too close to call’, (we should have gone out on a limb here), and predicted the two Green seats correctly.
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A tax on woke.
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We will see all of you in Trafalgar Square when we win. Come on England 🏴
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The England we believe in
pictured: Reform party win a majority, take government (2029)
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Polarising responses to our latest!
What do you think?
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@CuriousGazelle
They are Romanian in citizenship in some sense if they have Romanian passports (many in England do not, often coming from Slovakia, etc.), but they are not ethnic Romanians.
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What are the left excited about Starmer doing? Seems remarkable most of them seem bored as they win the greatest majority ever.
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… For this, we at Pimlico Journal should give a rare ‘thank you’ to the monarchy… royal warrants give Savile Row an unassailable air of legitimacy, helping sustain demand: the Shanghai businessman will get his suit made here on this basis alone.’
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@OGRolandRat
Not everything has a deep and/or political explanation for it, especially with J’accuse, where half or more of the articles are meant to be funny (whether or not you find them funny is a different matter).
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@CuriousGazelle
I think it is completely reasonable that ethnic Romanians seek to distinguish themselves strongly from them, even if I do somewhat agree that they are Romania’s problem.
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Was there a mole in Rishi Sunak’s team?
While there were rumours about an election for the entire day of the announcement (which was late), they only seem to have kicked off on the day itself.
Morgan McSweeney, Labour's campaign chief, bought up ad slots for the days before 4 Jul – & Sunak's team didn't. Via
@patrickkmaguire
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You would think nominally right wing newspapers would manage to use the word husband rather than partner for a formerly married couple.
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@mrsnodes
He’s not boring and reliable. That’s the exterior; he is fooling you.
He is Insane.
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Not really referring to the Corbynites that gave up on the whole song and dance years ago. Someone must be excited for him (other than yimbys who are excited for every politician for 5 minutes).
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@basedwagnerite
The odyssean education stuff from Cummings always seemed to apply to a desperately small number of candidates.
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Tube stations close with almost no warning, what feels like every week. It isn’t really surprising given that the staff are incentivised to take unannounced holiday by being ‘ill,’ which they alone can certify as illness.
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@NxlAnglo
It’s just a cash cow and that’s not a problem when it comes to something as stupid as this
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Support for comprehensive education was seen as a marker of eccentricity in the Parliamentary Labour Party until as late as the mid-1950s.
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Addendum: Reform now have five seats. We didn’t pick up on the specific one they gained, instead looking at Holden’s neighbouring constituency.
Although we identified the two rural Green seats, we didn’t expect them to actually win them.
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Saint-Simon called for the replacement of aristocracy with an 'industrial' society, organised in the interests of the productive: producers, scientists, and artists.
Far from being an egalitarian, Saint-Simon was a rare breed: a self-conciously progressive inegalitarian.
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In case any Americans or people who actually work missed it, here’s our review of Glastonbury.
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@B0mbadiI
Some people who know more about clothes than me said that they’re not very good, but they seem fine to me. Their shirts are better though
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‘Midjourney, please generate me the latest Disney-Pixar movie.’
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