Ashley Parker
@parkerflash
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mostly an anaesthetist in east anglia
Joined July 2010
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Pinned Tweet
Aled Jones' food hell is a puddle of water with a carrot and two lumps of coal in it.
#saturdaykitchen
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The call:
“Hello Anaesthetics? Could we ask for you to help with a cannula? We’ve tried loads of times but just can’t get it?”
The patient:
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Is today a good day to let you all know I’ve loved my first week in my new consultant job in Ipswich?
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There is unprecedented disruption right now in NHS hospitals
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03 August 2011 - first day as an FY1
03 August 2021 - last day as a registrar
I join the GMC Specialist Register today! Time to move on from 10 years as a junior doctor with my last (ever?) night shift tonight 🎉💉🏥💊👨🏽⚕️
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OMG I USED THE TINY CHLORAPREP FOR A CANNULA AND IT WAS REALLY CUTE
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Once at a respiratory arrest on a ward I asked for an iGel from the arrest trolley and a nurse gave me a sachet of AquaGel 🤷🏽♂️
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Having diligently looked for Osler’s nodes and Janeway lesions since my first term at med school in 2007, I’ve just seen them in a real patient for my very first time.
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since my second dose I’ve become 120% sexier do I need to report this
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Can we talk about doctors putting their whole CV of postnominals/diplomas etc. on email signatures and clinic letters?
#medtwitter
™️
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So grateful I changed my name to Ashley Doctor-Anaesthetics at the beginning of specialty training
#feelingthankful
#medtwitter
™️
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Good morning to everyone (apart from this neonatal resus manikin)
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Hurrah! It’s my 24th new job day as a junior doctor and my 5th new starter induction with
@NHSBartsHealth
!
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It turns out I was in Vogue back in March and none of you even told me??
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@rosieICM
“I haven’t read the book or watched the series, but I would like to point out that Adam Kay is wrong in the general sense, and anyone who is experiencing something different to my career outset last century is probably a terrible candidate for the profession”
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I’m pretty sure this will arrive without any problems whatsoever
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The meritocracy is a myth: “we are drawing heterosexual, white men from much further down the distribution of talent than we are for other social categories”
#WSM2023
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If only there was a more memorable anagram of C-LIST 🤔
Iron deficiency anaemia much more common than we think
33% of ED patients (or was it even more).
@davidcarr333
#EuSEM21
If Hb low we all think to check MCV (I do)
If MCV low think….
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We chilled on Sunday
Note about covid test.
You can get tested on Monday.
Be exposed to covid on Tuesday.
Get a negative result on Wednesday.
Go out to meet people on Thursday.
Be mildly symptomatic on Friday (“But I was negative”) .
Then get tested on Saturday.
Only to be positive on Monday.
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For when you need the bike to get you to the cardiac arrest
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I am concerned that these anaesthetists have provided inadequate airway management for combined thoraco-laparotomy and hepatectomy
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@Joanna_Liberty
My favourite was the surgical SHO who turned down my referral for pancreatitis from ED at the weekend as the amylase wasn’t back yet - who then referred to me in ICU on the Monday as the patient was sicker 🤷🏽♂️
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@DrLKVaughan
@zackferguson
I was always encouraged that after Billy left Ramsay Street he was able to follow in Karl’s footsteps and have a successful medical career
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If your unit does not have an outdoor terrace then please report this on your GMC training survey
#wellbeing
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It was much easier to do the paperwork to buy a flat and get a mortgage than to get my NHS smartcard
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I guess here in the UK this is a bit like that time I started a new registrar job and they had a new security badge and NHS smart card for me that already worked before I got there
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@DrSandman11
Buddy your hat should cover your forehead without leaving a gap with visor foam 🥽
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A photo of you in January 2020 without imagining what was to come
A photo of you in January 2020 without imagining what was to come
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More obstetricians?!
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Tragic lack of weekend service provision in NHS hospital 💀
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@Caroline_gasdoc
"I'm sorry, referring your patient for an anaesthetic is not the same as requesting a deep clean for the room"
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When the FY2 who has just completed MRCS and calls himself “Mr” goes on holiday in a van
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@GongGasGirl
“Can we please have less noise in theatre?”
“Sorry - this is my emotional support breathing noise”
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@SamuelBS85
I changed my name to “Ashley Anaesthetics” by Deed Poll at the end of CT1 to avoid any of this confusion
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@Medic_Russell
@bethicillin
@trufflepotamus
@Louisdebernard
@oli_m_sims
@WhistlingDixie4
I was in my 2nd year of my PhD. Please stop this discussion at once.
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If anyone needs a link to Alcoholics Anonymous from the college website, just look out for a big photo of my face
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My doctor told me that I have the prostate of a 43 year old man ☹️
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Booked in to see the dentist at 14:30. The receptionist was having absolutely none of it when I joked that’s the best time to have a dental appointment.
Two thirty.
TOOTH HURTY
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I scrolled past fully expecting this to be cake
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@dr_ashwitt
Do you want to see a dolphin doing spirometry through its blowhole? Of course you do 🐬
@tb_doc
@domcavlan
@drlaurajane
And dolphins can do peak flow, but not FEV1.
Horses with asthma (the heaves) used to be treated with bucketloads of sodium cromoglycate.
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@Not4Twos
@JuliaIsobelA
Likewise when the paediatric urologist told me as a medical student that I was wrong to refer to a hydrogen ion in solution as a proton. He even doubled down when I explained I had been using this correct term for the past decade, including during my PhD in organic chemistry 🙄
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Thinking about ‘where are you really from’ experiences - the guy who then asked “do you think you’ll ever go back to the Philippines?” and was then taken aback by my reply that I didn’t have the nationality, speak Filipino, or want to leave my family/social/professional life here
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@doctorrah
I seem to remember causing some ✨controversy✨ by prescribing 600 mg qds for postop analgesia for one of our patients… despite showing this BNF entry AND our local guidelines we had to get the pharmacist to come in on it?!
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The Peppa Pig app has a story that starts with Pedro Pony breaking his leg and I’m terrified to find out what happens when he goes to the vet
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Great to be a part of an outstanding department! 👍🏽🏥🎉
'OUTSTANDING' rating for critical care at The Royal London in the
@CareQualityComm
'caring' domain! Fantastic achievement!
#GettingBetter
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@ffolliet
@DrJenGunter
I'm going to start writing "natural" caesarean section on my anaesthetic charts - the description is what we do anyway??
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After Brexit, anaesthesia will be performed by asking the patient to lick a poison arrow frog before being smothered with an ether-soaked rag.
EXCLUSIVE: Ministers will have the power to overrule doctors’ prescriptions in case medicines run out after Brexit. Urgent government consultation launched on Tuesday, leaked to The Times
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Classic Whitechapel
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I think piercing a Capri-Sun with a cardboard straw is harder than some medical procedures
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Just went to have a closer look at a handbag dropped on the pavement on Whitechapel road to discover that it was actually a dead rat.
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The five stages of realising you're on nights when the clocks go back:
- Denial
- Anger
- Bargaining
- Depression
- Acceptance
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@jopo899
Hopefully the hackers can get the clocks to sync between the anaesthetic machine and ventilator displays in both the anaesthetic room and theatre
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