nikita doval Profile Banner
nikita doval Profile
nikita doval

@nikitadoval

Followers
3,893
Following
946
Media
110
Statuses
6,720

World weary but still a little funny. Occasional writer. Been there, there and yes; there. Formerly @columbiajourn

New Delhi
Joined January 2011
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
I’ve been seeing a lot of jokes about the show on matchmaking and arranged marriages on Netflix and as someone who’s lived through this hell for most of her twenties, I’m here to tell you; it’s no joking matter 1/n
450
6K
21K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
Alia Bhatt is a very talented actor but Gangubai could have done with a Tabu or a Vidya Balan or a Madhuri Dixit. The Hindi film industry is such a shallow space that outstanding talent doesn’t stand a chance after a certain age, even if you’ve been at the top of your game.
205
556
7K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
But my scars remain. This is a system which reduces women to cattle, where you are repeatedly subject to humiliation and insult just because the other side can. It perpetuates the worst form of patriarchal abuse and while we should laugh about it, we also need to have a serious
24
510
5K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
panic attacks till years later) the arranged marriage system ruined my relationship with my parents, especially my mum through my twenties. It took a happy go lucky, cheerful kid and made her a nervous wreck who would every single day grapple with the question; what’s wrong with
9
179
3K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
conversation amongst ourselves that why does this still persist? Why do we still let it persist?
41
152
3K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
My parents couldn’t fathom why their daughter would say no to absolutely fine alliances with some very fine boys (nope, they weren’t). It led to ugly fights, stressful nights where no one at home would even speak to me and several panic attacks (I didn’t even know they were
3
132
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
me? For gossipy members of extended family, I was the girl “who demands too much”, my parents became a cautionary tale “don’t indulge your child like the Dovals do” Compromise was a word that everyone felt compelled to offer me as a magic wand and really, could I
5
130
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
My parents started “looking” for a potential groom while I was in my early twenties (23, I think) because while they were very liberal, it turned out they were pretty conventional too. I wasn’t told about this “search” till two days before the boy and his parents were coming over
9
141
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
In front of him and said, isn’t anyone going to serve me? I was able to put a stop to this nonsense once and for all after turning 28. My parents listened to me and as the years went by, I repaired my relationship with them and with myself. I made jokes out of my experiences
5
97
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Daughter in law but they do want one with degrees that they respect; engineering, medicine, heck even Msc would do. What is journalism? In one memorable instance it turned out my family wasn’t high quality Brahmin enough also/
9
99
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
Is Delhi the “rape capital” of the country? I don’t have an answer to that but after what happened to me yesterday, I can assure you, it’s not city for women. Last night, I was charged with chauffeur duty for my father, uncle and cousin after a family dinner
172
1K
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
The NRIs were the worst. One came straight from the airport and chewed gum while talking to my dad. He proceeded to tell me that he needs to take a decision ASAP because he’s going back in three weeks and from my place, he has to go and meet three other girls, so what did I think
19
106
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
140
91
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
I was almost always not talking enough, or not fair enough or not demure enough or, in spite of degrees from liberal arts institutes that were the best in the country and the world, not “professionally qualified” enough. No, they don’t want a working/
7
104
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
It was the first in a series of engineering school graduates who may or may not be in the US but who’s attributes almost ever were, degree, pay packet and family background. What did I bring to the table? Looks and family and prestige in terms of being educated. Or so it was blvd
6
92
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
I want to clarify at this point that I wasn’t a passive recipient, coyly serving tea to families trooping in. I led the charge in rejecting men and then some more because I couldn’t fathom getting married and especially to the ones who walked into my parents living room/
3
82
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
stop being so ungrateful? Couldn’t I see what I was doing to my parents? I did succumb once; I took the practical decision to say “yes” to an engineering (what else) graduate on the west coast. Two months of emotional abuse over long distance phone calls (he was really
2
91
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Shameless, I told my parents. They were shocked but “was I sure I wasn’t exaggerating?” I don’t know what happened that night but I woke up the next morning to my parents having called off the engagement. I was 27. I had been in this hell for four years, I had discovered
4
87
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
the table from you and ask you, are you a virgin and what are your views on cheating and he wants three children and I have to say yes to that before this can go further. I had the father of one tell me that I don’t need to work even as the son looked at the tray of snacks
4
98
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
committed to hating women) where I was chastened for my class Xth marks in Maths and scolded for laughing while talking to his friend followed. When I was told one memorable Sunday six weeks before the wedding that I absolutely cannot take his name, is there no limit to my being
5
82
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
That stress made my appetite clam up after I went hungry for three days in a row (over agonising about how to tell my parents yet again that no, I won’t marry another prospective suitor) I had found out that boys who’s mother’s extolled their “poetry writing” will sit across
6
86
2K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
TV anchors gleefully awaiting Deepika Padukone’s questioning; why would you hate a financially independent, good looking, successful woman so much? What threatens you? why this gleeful anticipation at the discomfort of someone who has been vocal about her mental health struggles?
44
217
1K
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
In a busy street with cars all around and threatened us with a gun because we didn’t move our car for his, a private vehicle. So rape capital or not, this is no country or city for women or for ordinary people. Get the hell put. #RapeinIndia
67
197
846
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
The most trusted voice on Covid in India today is that of an economist. A profile of @ShamikaRavi
@Openthemag
Open Magazine
4 years
India’s Explainer: How @ShamikaRavi became the country’s most trusted Covid-19 statistician, writes @nikitadoval , #Coronavirus , #Covid19 ,
Tweet media one
52
226
1K
21
62
579
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
@AnishaNDhawan It’s not about the institution anisha but rather the system. We all know of people who have very strong, very happy arranged marriages, but I found the process of getting to it very tough and honestly, distasteful. Mom and dad realised the toll it was taking on me eventually.
7
11
366
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
I was jittery, my legs were shaking but I drove. I want to add at this point that both my father and uncle are war decorated veterans. My dad in particular is a 6 feet tall well built man you will think twice before taking on. Same for my cousin. But this man stood there
4
47
257
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
@Hash611Shah @alphaideas I really think the trigger for his anger was my gender...and the fact that I refused to budge. And women are people too :)
22
16
257
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
Finally the traffic starts to move and I move the car forward. The fortuner also manages to shift lanes except for one man from the group who stands a little to the side of my car. We make eye contact, he’s glaring at me. And then, he takes a gun out. HE TAKES A GUN OUT
9
82
244
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
Strokes it, points it at me. Everyone around is a little slow to catch on, to what is happening. My father realises and tries to get out of the car but the man has turned away and gone. Much to my shame, I averted my eyes when he actually took it out because my heart stopped
7
45
203
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
@SMehdudia Thank you Sujay sir. I’ve realised that when we actually go through things we don’t know just how bad it is. Only time can give you perspective. I used to joke about these incidents when they would happen; today I only get angry.
4
6
198
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
We left Saket around 11:00 pm and were returning to Gurgaon from MG road. It had been raining and the lights were not working. There were cops managing the traffic but the wait time at one light was over ten minutes. We are all chatting, oblivious to a big Toyota fortuner
3
43
185
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
@AliyaNazki Thank you. It’s always in hindsight that you realise how bad things were. I was very very lucky that I had friends who held my hand and that my parents were able to stand up to the system eventually and say enough. Most aren’t.
14
6
179
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
Next to us, the driver of which is clearly starting to get restless. Two young men walk over to my dad’s side of the car and ask (I must say politely) that we move our car forward. There’s less than half a feet between our car and the vehicle ahead and my dad says no
1
39
165
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
The guy insists so we move. A bit. Then another guy comes, this time to my cousin’s side (he was sitting next to me) and asks us to move. By this time there are at least four of these young men trying to “manage” traffic, which is basically trying to get all cars to move so that
1
38
160
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
Their car can jump lanes. Each time they come back to our car because we are parallel to theirs and there really is no space to move. Things are becoming het up because the now polite men are becoming aggressive though they are still talking to the men in the car politely
1
39
148
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
@suhasinih For some strange reason the gun nozzle is imprinted on my mind. He was a few feet away but that tiny hole was larger than life.
12
8
137
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
Please Amplify #SOSDelhi Jeevan Jyoti Clinic and hospital in Dilshad Garden has 48 patients, out of whom 12 are in the ICU( 3 on Ventilators ) Others in the wards ore also on oxygen. They have just 1 hour of oxygen backup left and need atleast 10 D type cylinders(40 Litres)
1
185
117
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Screenshot-ing this because no desire to give traction to this way of thinking but the country at large can say anything, ANYTHING about this young woman, try to rip her to pieces (literally, as we saw a few days ago) but if she sends across a message, then it’s arrogance? 1/
Tweet media one
5
28
118
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
A few times in my reporting career I have come across individuals who, armed with determination and a blueprint of a scheme turn around a place. Paramjeet, a former soldier turned sarpanch of Kothal Khurd who has ensured water supply in every home in his village, is one of them.
@Openthemag
Open Magazine
4 years
A Thirst for Change: A sarpanch brings round-the-clock water supply to every household in his Haryana village, writes @nikitadoval , #FutureOfWater ,
Tweet media one
Tweet media two
0
7
31
3
17
105
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
@PranavDixit @santois “No family; no friends (surprising?) no job” BUT pots of money. So I moved to Goa with my teak bed though I stayed in a five star also. There, fixed the headline, merged the intro.
4
3
96
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
This is a huge shout out for the Journalists who are covering Covid in India. There are physical risks but no one talks about the emotional risks of bringing this particular story home. #pandemic
1
19
96
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
6 months
@_SophieSchol would love to visit your city and exchange stories of just how much it is like my city and how our identities while split so far apart are still so close to each other ❤️
27
2
78
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
@somenmishra0 @DearthOfSid Hi, not quite sure what to make out of your tone. If there is a fact to be corrected, surely it can be done politely? And not everyone tweets with the intention to go viral. Some of us just like sending thoughts into the ether.
4
1
77
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
That’s the fastest anyone would have ever gotten a table there.
@abaruah64
amit baruah
4 years
Sarvana Bhavan in CP is Open. Photo: RV Moorthy for ⁦ @the_hindu
Tweet media one
16
38
229
4
3
77
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Garhwali Brahmins sacrifice goats on dussera and smoke their intestines for prasad; kachmoli
2
9
74
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
I don’t know what Rhea Chakraborty’s gender political stance is but what she is being subjected to is downright misogyny which expects women to be neither seen nor heard and will still find a way to blame them for everything. And that’s what her message is.
1
22
67
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
I write on Indian Matchmaking and why in spite of my experiences (or probably because of them) I felt the most sympathetic towards Akshay and Pradhyuman.
@latimesent
LAT Entertainment
4 years
Commentary: What Netflix's 'Indian Matchmaking' doesn't tell you about arranged marriage
2
8
23
5
8
56
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
This tweet is the perfect example of just how much of a performative space social media is, with one cynical eye firmly fixed on engagement. Here’s a life tip; you will survive if you don’t have a hot take on an extremely serious and distressing issue.
Tweet media one
1
8
51
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
1 year
Ran-veer Singh is a superstar. That’s all. #RockyAurRaniKiiPremKahaani
0
18
53
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Good people of twitter if you know young men/ women who are looking for partners for an arranged marriage, either on their own (on , etc) or through their parents, and are open to talking to a journalist, please connect them to me? Baked goodies in return.
11
19
52
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
@Mehitabel_Delhi Shefali Shah! And yeah, Bhansali is mostly smoke and mirrors, no substance.
4
0
48
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
Somewhere in Rajasthan, three different kinds of breakfasts are being consumed.
Tweet media one
Tweet media two
Tweet media three
4
4
51
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
9 years
Hey, coming to Gurugram for a drink? Nuh #GuruGram
7
35
50
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
. @dmgbnagar hello, an elderly couple in Delhi needs to get to their son in Noida urgently. The gentleman in question is very frail. The e pass application has been pending for a few days now. Reference number: 141029876. Could this be expedited? Will be grateful. Thanks
4
18
49
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
What a powerful picture
@The_Karthik
Karthik Nagarajan
5 years
That’s students in front of a bus which was carrying people detained #Resist
Tweet media one
13
443
862
2
10
37
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Neighbourhood has officially hit rock bottom. Someone is playing chingari koi bhadke really loudly.
9
1
41
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
Please stop romanticising the loss of army families with captions like brave and grace. No one wants a tri-colour in place of a loved one.
0
11
40
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Hi, a family friend, a young doctor, is covid +ve and is in Medanta ICU Gurugram. He needs AB+ or AB-blood for plasma therapy. Criteria for plasma donors: 1. 28 days should have elapsed from the date of covid positive report 2. 14 days after negative report Please share.
6
93
38
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
The last hug was on March 17th It’s July now When you reach out next, will the bones turn to dust? #mainbhirupikaur
1
2
41
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Why don’t they just put a leash around our neck while they are at it? I don’t have words to articulate my rage and I write for a living.
@Raksha_Kumar
Raksha Kumar
4 years
#MadhyaPradesh Chief Minister said a new system will be put in place, under which any woman moving out of her house for work will register herself at the local police station, and she will be tracked for her safety.
263
223
778
4
7
37
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
One of my favourite past-times on the last day of every month is to go to Susan Miller’s account, look up the reason why she won’t be posting on time and enjoy the meltdown people have in the replies section.
5
4
34
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Why do ordinary citizens celebrate the overreach of the state in this country? Neither your caste nor your religion or your degrees are coming to your rescue if the state comes for you. So stop celebrating extra judicial killings. Demand better procedures. #vikasDubeyEncounter
4
14
34
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
Every few years a young man or woman will come forward with fantastic claims about being a NASA certified genius. I examine the curious phenomenon of the who, what and more importantly why NASA.
@Openthemag
Open Magazine
3 years
Rocket Science: The curious case of fake #NASA geniuses, writes @nikitadoval ,
Tweet media one
1
1
8
2
9
35
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
For centuries the one humped Camel has been the unofficial mascot of Rajasthan. It has served kings and commoners alike but now it seems it’s watch is ending.
@Openthemag
Open Magazine
5 years
The last straw: The camels are vanishing from Rajasthan, writes @nikitadoval ,
Tweet media one
0
3
7
0
10
32
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Today I saw two peacocks dance and a peahen saunter by without a second glance. It was exhilarating.
1
0
33
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
The 10 year old held out the 3 year old first and then jumped. The kids, they are all right. And maybe we will be too.
@ksadjadpour
Karim Sadjadpour
4 years
Two boys—ages 10 and 3–jumped 30 feet from a burning building in Grenoble, France. Two of the six adults who caught them broke their arms. Amazing heroism all around.
831
28K
92K
1
6
32
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Everyday I walk miles But cover no distance There are no callouses on my feet Just the floor of the house And it’s scuffed tiles #stuckinside
0
1
31
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Is there anyone paying their house help without announcing it on twitter, under the guise of shaming anonymous neighbours/acquaintances? Or is it a requirement, like arogya setu?
1
2
29
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
9 years
"We will build the Agra Lucknow expressway in 22 months. This will reduce travelling time between Delhi and Lucknow to five hours" @livemint
4
19
28
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
1 year
@megataros I started running as a way to cope with my increasing frustration with journalism. I did it without any distractions, no music, no podcasts so that I could have long conversations with myself. Led to some very surprising answers. I still run. But I’m no longer a journalist.
0
0
30
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
7 years
What a smart, funny take down by @DardEdiscourse "How many fascists can one khandaan have, I wonder?"
2
13
26
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
@JabongIndia your customer service further adds to this experience. All I get are computer generated automated emails rather than a personal assurance of delivery. Your unprofessionalism in this day and age is incomprehensible.
22
2
26
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
I think we all need a hug today.
2
1
27
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
7 years
@sidin Adopted a monkey as a pet when I was refused a puppy. Got bitten. Twice. Ten injections and much trauma later, was given the first love of my life, a two month old puppy named Diana.
1
0
26
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Finished watching Unda and was reminded of Newton though the films are very different. I’ve been watching a lot of Malayalam and tamil movies these past few months and it’s so sad. How mainstream Hindi cinema cannot even begin to come close to this kind of storytelling?
4
1
26
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
@SpiritofMumbye Parents really just want the best for you. Sometimes your versions of what is best may not match but eventually they do come around. My parents took a step back because they realised what it was doing to me and I know, even today, years later, that I was very lucky.
0
4
25
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
What sort of ridiculous assumption is this about “poverty?” And why do we feel the need to glamourise someone’s “humble” background as a testament to their genuine achievement?
Tweet media one
3
3
25
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
6 years
Shouldn’t the PM be addressing us? What is the government thinking? What is this silence in aid of?
3
12
24
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
Happy holi to everyone except for Indian origin American food writers who are passing off kadhi as turmeric yoghurt soup and aalo sabzi as Indian potato mash.
6
1
24
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Is there a special kind of eye roll for Indian fitness “influencers” who insist you eat “local” and then give a curd rice recipe but with Greek yoghurt? Whatever happened to good old ghar ka dahi shaina/taina/insert new agey spa name here.
3
2
24
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
There is a day fauji families dread and pray that it never comes. But it almost always does. Either to you or to your neighbour, classmate, family friend. Today it’s come again. You can leave the force behind but the dread of that day never leaves you. Olive green for life.
0
3
24
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
@thesinghsonia @DanishKh4n Aaah…happy to be corrected.
1
0
23
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
8 years
So of course let's slut shame the woman who holds NO public office.
@KBByju
KB Byju
8 years
Dev Fadnavis' wife is dancing with the country's chief economist as India slips into a never-seen-before financial crisis.
Tweet media one
88
279
253
2
16
22
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
And here we thought that most Indian brassieres were boring cotton affairs.
Tweet media one
6
1
22
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
The manic grin, spittle flying glee with which the news of the arrest is being received. What is this sense of victimisation we have that can only be satiated by the complete annihilation of a young life and a family?
2
6
21
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
@vsirnate @IJaising Very interesting thread Vasundhara and completely echoes my thoughts and discomfort with the actor in question. Like most of her ilk, she bows the way the wind blows and adopts personas depending on what she has at stake.
2
1
20
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Fantastic coverage of a President’s attempted coup by the US mainstream media without any sermonising or random facts from two hundred years ago thrown in or even sweeping statements. Looking forward to see the same standards being maintained for reporting from other countries.
0
8
22
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
5 years
Many of us have silently loved this country without any notions of religious or cultural superiority. It was a love that believed in an idea of a nation. Oh, the idea was flawed, of course it was, but it was ours. It stood for something. And now we are left with nothing.
4
15
21
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
2 years
@rjginnie Also the same people extolling the virtues of the goddess will attack those who eat meat during these nine days, never mind that some communities honour her that way. It must be terribly sad to be so petrified of diversity and vibrancy.
4
1
21
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
I miss boxing. It took care of all my urges to punch idiots.
1
0
21
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 months
@sanitarypanels “English skills” “low class” Megha must be popular at dinner parties.
0
0
19
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
8 years
Because achievements like theirs, deserve writings like these. Sharda Ugra's fantastic piece on the Rio winners
1
14
19
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
@KavitaThomas I said no, a lot and very loudly. Hence, the stress. But it did carry on for as long as it did because even if you are as stubborn as a mule you do struggle with feelings of guilt. Am I a bad daughter? Why can’t I say yes when everyone else does it easily? So you persist.
3
1
21
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
Slight autumn chills, a clear sky and a lungful of clean air. It’s almost like the October of 90s, in Delhi today.
1
3
20
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Journalism has plumbed to such depths that I’m not sure saying “but we are print media” qualifies as a distinction anymore. Many of us, even those in broadcast, still believe in the profession, toil hard to bring out stories but are condemned now by the actions of a handful.
4
2
20
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
4 years
Watching The Great Indian Kitchen and it’s SO good that it’s making me angry enough to consider stop watching it. But first let me get a plate of dosa with chutney and sambar.
2
0
21
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
A nameless, faceless man telling a super achiever woman what she should be doing with her body. Mankind is exhausting.
Tweet media one
7
1
20
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
Today morning I woke up and choose chocolate cake. Even before coffee. Sundaying on Sunday.
2
1
19
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
3 years
@MnshaP There are people who’ve been sitting on the East Coast for over a year and confidently talking about the situation on the ground here so 🤷‍♀️
0
0
19
@nikitadoval
nikita doval
2 years
So many things to love about @mehtahansal ’s baai in Modern Love Mumbai starting with the lovely lovely Chandni Raat by Ali Sethi. A tender love story that works on just so many levels without shouting ‘look at me.’ #ModernLoveMumbai
1
2
20