sia ~ forced recovery
@memyselfedandi
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✨ recovery to relapse ✨ heartbreak & motherhood ✨ lowest: 13.1 ✨ current: 17s ✨ highest: 24.4✨ 170cm ✨ no minors please ✨
england
Joined January 2023
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Pinned Tweet
if you’re a sh account please don’t expect a follow back if you follow me i can’t stomach that stuff it disturbs my brain and stomach deeply - i’ve sh’d previously but i can’t comprehend sharing it or anything and i definitely don’t want to expose myself to it in any way.
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no one talks about how fucking boring not eating all day is
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@puppystarves
trust me i know for a fact he isn’t speaking on behalf of all men i know of plenty of men who don’t care and prefer all of that
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@angelicfemme444
someone i was once IP with was BMI 9 and still got her period but she was so educated on the right “foods and supplements” to make sure her blood work and everything was 100% whilst literally being emaciated/anorexic
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@nrexic
EVERYONE SAYING ITS MAYO ANNOYS ME TF OUT! its garlic sauce like does no where other than brit do that stuff or something
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@skinnyprinsess
but 10k isn’t exercise is it? i thought every human being was recommend to do that amount daily? anything extra would be exercise? well that’s my logic i guess i’m probably wrong
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@SLEEPYT0WNS
looks like the same girl with and without make up and eye brows tidied up. no big difference. both pretty.
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i’m not sure if my body can handle much more of this “getting out of bed” nonsense
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@ldontfckingcare
stay safe girl, i know it’s easy to say and hard to do with where you’re at right now mentally, but please fight this, you’re worth more than your ed.
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@psIprincess
@dpsandimdead
far from the truth, true recovery is a lot more than the weight gain. it’s the mental emotional and psychological recovery that is the most important thing in recovery.
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i still think about the way it was in the beginning
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you can't control what's happened, you can't control your pain, but you can control what you do and don't eat. you can control your weight.
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@dietmtndewbunny
noooo ✋🏽 just no. not cool at all. and if you use someone else’s mascara i hope your lashes fall off from it. so wrong.
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@4lmondcookie
you’re so much more thinner than this though. you can’t see it because you’re mind isn’t healthy - you’re so talented at art though
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@contrrl
eating disorders don’t just disappear when you become a adult, the behaviours and rituals don’t just “get better” that logic is pathetic
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@nourishing4what
that’s so cute though i love when my neighbour at my old place used to knock for onions or a egg or something 🥰
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eating isn’t even worth it, like why have i bothered the last 3 days to try to be okay.
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texting someone how you feel whilst crying is one of the most painful things you’ll ever do
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@ldontfckingcare
why is this becoming so common amongst ed’s - it saddens me so much. population control is a real thing
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@angelicfemme444
it actually looks like muscle tbh and having that there long term is better for you than having nothing at all…
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@lexaheartV3
the grime on that scale probably add about 5lbs of weight to your actual weight 🤢
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a month from now, you can either have a month of progress or a month of excuses on why you didn’t
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ed logic: if i have to go without things like love, affection, and physical touch, then why not go without sustenance as well and just suffer to the very maximum extent
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@chlorexic
anything more than 800 is unacceptable at the moment if i go over then i have to purge by exercise
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can’t help but feel completely worthless though, like i’m missing something, like i’m lacking something
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some words stay in your head long after they’re spoken
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words mean everything to me, what someone says to me matters. that’s why reassurance is so important to me.
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@tuzitingg
your mum takes your bcs and your dad brings you scales to the hospital cos you asked? as if how about thaaaaat.
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@angelicfemme444
pray it continues because it’s good for you in every sense of the word; now and when you recover 🙏🏽 (i said when and not if because you can and will one day) 🩷
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protein bars are good but why are they so high in calories
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@fakersbf
nah the scale just is inaccurate depending on the surface you weigh in on. impossible.
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@xeromeena
fuck my life i feel this so badly i feel like so many people be hitting a plateau. kmn
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@angelicfemme444
i believe i lost the most when fasting for 18hrs window then eating during the 6 then 18hrs again. it worked well
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i came across this letter from my principal at high school whilst being inpatient; i got caught using “pro ana sites” at school back then. i just had to share the love
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bitches be like i’m going to fast today and then have the biggest binge they’ve had in months.
it’s me; i’m bitches
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@ldontfckingcare
oh honey, i remember that moment in my life it’s awful but remember it’s for your own good, it’s going to help you in the long run, you need it. all the best and stay strong no matter how hard it gets. 🩷 you’ve got this… you; not your ed. 💪🏽
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if it keeps you from killing yourself it's not stupid. this applies to anything btw.
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“be the bigger person” girl i’m actively working on being the smallest person in the room
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@xodiorwhorexo
@skinnyprinsess
i’m sure your exaggerating right now? you must do more without realising. daily without exercising and just being at home doing chores, climbing stairs etc is a easy 9k+
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@ldontfckingcare
@cinammon_cals
yeah i read a few people who gave up on themselves and choose to die and let their ed win and not try to recover physically or psychologically -
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@roxiethins
anorexia secretly cheers you on on your head when they skinny shame you, it’s a good feeling
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@lightasfairies
@sagesd1ary
sad truth but a reality check we all need to be reminded off; relate to everything you’ve said at my lowest but my mind, my damn mind wants it back because this time it’s gonna be different 🫣
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@https_chickens
but if you starve for 3 days and binge for 1 (as long as you don’t eat over 9300 calories in your binge you’ve still lost weight.
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@sk1nn1heart
sooo true especially when i was at my lowest; it brought on such a shameful feeling over me like i didn’t wanna hear those words at all like WHYYY are you using them words why
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a lot of people seem to miss the point of how truly destructive mental illness is
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when i’m retricting i just feel like i have my shit together and when i’m not i don't
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it scares me that you never know what someone is thinking or feeling towards you and everything that they say could be one massive lie
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i love my daughters so much and i would do everything i can to protect them. i never want them having a eating disorder. i hope and pray they never do. i’ve did well hiding things but their dad, their damn dad made them aware of my “lack of eating” they were clueless before that
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@mypeehard
it’s refreshing to see something like this on here, it’s never about your looks as long as you’re mentally and emotionally well and happier and coping that’s all that matters but you look great either way.
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@zombixgirl
but its how they feel and they have a right to post it on their social platform if they wish to do so. its highly unlikely they’ll kts over it but in the moment its no doubt how they must feel.
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everyone on my edtwt is so tiny it makes me so sad that your ed doesn’t allow you all to see how unwell you really are
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@da1lxnn
cold as in physically? or emotionally? physically definitely and emotionally for me personally? yes definitely i care a lot less about the things that really would usually matter to me.
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the toughest part of letting go is realizing that the other person already did
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do u ever just wonder how different ur life would be if that one thing didn’t happen?
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waiting is the most painful part of this whole process.
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eating is not worth the shame u feel after!! eating is not worth the shame u feel after!! eating is not worth the shame u feel after!! eating is not worth the shame u feel after!! eating is not worth the shame u feel after!! eating is not worth the shame u feel after!!
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legit no amount of food can make you feel as good as being skinny can
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i don't care if it hurts, i want a perfect body, i want a perfect soul
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note to self: yeah it tastes good but you know that as soon as you're done eating you're going to hate yourself. don’t put yourself through the pain
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is it just me or does fasting become 10x easier when someone you value is mean with you?
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the bullshit and lies really just keeps adding fuel to my ed
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i might not be losing weight but i’m definitely losing my will to live
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just ruminate on this thought for a bit. do you realize just how vital your brain is? yes, you need pretty much all of your organs to survive, but your brain controls it all. if that’s not healthy, your entire sense of being is disrupted.
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you’ve made a decision: you will not stop. The pain is necessary, especially the pain of hunger. it reassures you that you are strong, can withstand anything.
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@4lmondcookie
people asking how 🫣🥴 erm a mental health illness, it’s called a eating disorder.
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can anyone recommend me some apps to keep track on my fast? not intermittent fasting, i mean like actually a 24+ fast
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