El
@langho
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mr bush we have found the weapon of mass destruction - gary mugson
North West, England
Joined February 2009
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Ant McPartlin enjoying a curry:
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My brain after eleven pints:
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You got your tickets for the beheading livestream? Yeah all for a good cause isn’t it, mental health charity I believe
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I am in loco parentis,
I am the last remaining contestant on the apprentice,
I am the home trained dentist
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Shouldn’t really be allowed as he used to be our chairman
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@depthsofwiki
You also have to factor in the possibility of a bus arriving immediately after you set off walking, zooming past you leaving you humiliated
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Stephen Fry: people need to be thicker skinned. Victims of trauma need to get over it
Stephen Fry: quits twitter when ppl disagree with him
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@nourmqaryouti
Defo enjoys playing football and rugby and going to the cinema with his brother
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Yeah Taxpayer will be paying for
#ChelseaManning
hormones. They also payed for her to be tortured. Guess which one they're outraged at
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@edhaygarth
Ant McPartlin is known to associate with Declan ‘Dec’ Donnelly. If he was particularly enjoying a curry with Dec, he might proclaim ‘Declan (this) rice is fucking sensational man’
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We could conceivably get Corbyn to wear the hat I reckon. Sure fire vote winner
@jeremycorbyn
@PeoplesMomentum
get on it
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@Callum_HCAFC
@carinacymraes
Basing your geopolitical worldview on who nice to you at school
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@deanmw246
@ladbible
yeah cos trying to shoot people is worse than blocking a road. Hope this helps.
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On behalf of the children’s home, I’d like to thank Harrison, Thorpe and Smith for their brilliant idea to behead that guy live on YouTube. Because of them, we’re able to build a brand new play area for the kids, complete with a toy guillotine they can do magic tricks with.
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@Iwontcalmdown
@MPIainDS
@Conservatives
Be a bit odd if someone graffitied’Tories out’ on a Labour office
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When you see a Tweet about Old Holborn being alive:
I hope the couple of tweets I've seen about Old Holborn aren't true
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This is fake. They would have died if they had stood there for that long. Also the guy has clearly had a hair cut. My theory is, they simply went back after 50 years and recreated the photo.
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@LMAsaysno
@_SaveOurStatues
the snowflake mob will no doubt try to destroy this at the first opportunity, please send all your top men to provide round the clock protection to this piece of our heritage
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@adam_wass
@_nicroyx
I’m sure I remember being surprised to find out she was British...and now this?
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@TommyJake12
@SkyFootball
how can you be a father, partner, ex soldier, and an ex footballer?
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@GilesGraeme
@JustStop_Oil
Yeah do it during an illegal dog fight, something which by its very definition, not many people will see. That'll be a good publicity stunt.
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She’ll never come back from this. She won’t see 2002.
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I loathe George Osbourne and everything he stands for with every fibre of my being BUT throwing confetti at him and his new wife on his wedding day rather than stones, bricks, boulders, poison etc is unacceptable
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Luton Town are in the Championship Playoffs.
This is the main entrance to their stadium.
Incredible to think this ground could be in the Premier League next season
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Did everyone just collectively forget that time Theon Greyjoy murdered two innocent children because he wanted to look hard
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When you assume a town in Yorkshire is actually in Wales just cos it's hard to pronounce
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If there were a “Sports Twitter” Hall of Fame, honoring the best sports-related tweets of all time, what would be your nominee?
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@WritingBblUnvrs
standing up to racism by playing into the 'black people all look the same' trope. Top activism there.
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@DegreaseNeil
Right but what has Jupiter actually achieved? As opposed to Earth which has created 100% of all known life in the solar system? Nothing. Joke planet.
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The apostles could never write something this profound
i’m sorry every ‘tumblr post that goes so raw you think it’s from the bible’ actually does just sound like it’s from a tumblr post
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@EmmaLevin_
@FootballCliches
53- hurt didn’t begin until England were beaten by Yugoslavia at Euro 68
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Would be a shame if people were to use a football club as a vehicle for positive change, food bank drives, supporting refugees, fighting period poverty, evictions and deportations while having a great time with mates at the footy!
Hi mate that’s a lovely suburban non-league regional football team you’ve got there would be a shame if it was to become …. “Anti-fascist”
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In Daniel Powter's 'Bad Day' why is there a female guest vocalist that sings the first syllable of the word 'holiday' and nothing else
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@MartinSLewis
Depends on the cause. If its cancer research or guide dogs then no. If it's a shop raising funds for terrorist organisations then yes definitely ok to haggle.
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I’ve got another espresso to make
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@09_GJC
@AyoCaesar
Yeah we should just not report racial crimes, then people will stop doing them, I am very intelligent
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@ZettelkastenDev
@ajplus
Karl Marx was from a capitalist country, and pretty much lived in capitalist countries all his life so yeah accurate meme
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@John4Carlisle
What if my political view is that defacing your billboards is good? Do you respect that?
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Absolute power move by the Vengaboys, releasing a ‘Christmas album’ which is just all the normal Vengaboys songs but with a sleigh bell in the background
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*champions league theme played badly on a recorder*
These are the wankers
The baaaastards
The snaaakes
Worst gobshites on Earth
THE JOURNOS
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@stonecoldstev3
@ChutneyDuvall
@immolations
Remember to check your call centre worker privilege guys
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@GroundedTech
@NoContextBrits
They’re applauding the photographer for capturing the moment. Some of the greatest photos ever taken depict atrocities.
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@NoContextBrits
People who care about the environment making dietary choices that benefit the environment. Shocker.
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@Dashfah1
@sportbible
That is probably Beitar Jerusalem's 'La Familia' faction. I don't know what Macabbi fans are like but Hapoel are Israel's main left-wing club and have a large Arab contingent
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