maddie Profile
maddie

@fettyschwapp

Followers
190
Following
151
Media
18
Statuses
117

punished for living in the moment

Joined June 2024
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
hi twitter it’s maddie fettyschwapp i accidentally left my account deactivated for too long and had to make a new one……. hello oomfies
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
11 days
don’t move to new york city baby it’s gonna change the way you dress
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
1 month
it would be nice if u could walk around with a coffee in the art museum. however i understand why this isn’t an option
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
22 days
me and my 5 girlfriends who have gone 6 turns without sinking a ball vs the line of guys waiting for a pool table
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
i’m going to keep having fun listening to the green album and ignoring the annoying stuff y’all stay safe tho
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
21 days
maddie
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
1 month
i do not want to download an app i do not want to create an account
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
14 days
something really moving about watching keenan thompson wait in line to redeem his dave and busters tickets….. stars they’re just like us
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
17 days
everything changed for me when i downloaded the wikipedia app
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
21 days
i’m like a weeaboo but for the gorgeous and proud nation of ireland
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
10 days
i really like that this picture of me dressed as al capone has gotten more likes than any other selfie i’ve posted. radiant inner beauty
@fettyschwapp
maddie
11 days
don’t move to new york city baby it’s gonna change the way you dress
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
1 month
it’s so fun tweeting with a fully developed frontal lobe and a life full of love/joy
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
20 days
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
1 month
i feel so bad for beach haters like how rare for an activity to be indulgent, guiltless, and free
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
going to “sorry online ceramics is breaking up :(“ my way into some dates
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
(lou reed singing pale blue eyes voice) sometimes i feel so over, sometimes i feel so back
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
gofund me to help me leave my toxic living environment (my roommate is repimanding me for bringing home 9 tiki mugs from the minor league baseball game)
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
he posted that letter for clout he knew the engagement was going to go crazy
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
11 days
spending $2 on an avocado feels absurd. however spending $2 on a diet coke feels essential
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
taking the manhattan bound j train across the bridge
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
8 days
lalala it’s taxes and flirting and discourse u don’t get it. i had a dream i sculpted an elephant from clay
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
getting a job at trader joe’s so i can learn their employee secrets about flirting
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
in new york city you can do anything you want as long you don’t want to use the bathroom without waiting in line 30 minutes
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
10 days
emily in paris season 4
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
i think sugar factory was really the point of no return. absolutely heinous and unchic and they got away with it because influencer marketing was new and no one knew what to post on instagram. i couldn’t sleep last night thinking about this
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
8 days
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@PopBase
Pop Base
12 days
Name your favorite quote by a celebrity.
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
10 days
complaining and sighing before every single run like i did not choose to do this and haven’t been doing it nearly every day for years
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
21 days
i like living in new york city but i hate when someone tells me to check out a restaurant
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
24 days
the best feature of social media is expediting the experience of when u meet a stranger and find out you have a mutual acquaintance
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
asap rocky x jessica pratt son or fred again x emmylou harris daughter
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
i think it is awesome that people who watch love island talk about it like it’s a job
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
1 month
there should be more grassy hills for all to play
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
17 days
they’re going to have the secret service at phebe’s
@PageSix
Page Six
17 days
Barron Trump, 18, flanked by security as he arrives at NYU for first day of college classes
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
i had 9000 followers on twitter once they just went to a different school
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
so interesting to be back on twitter and see people performing misery for attention. i live with an unflappable joie de vivre and a twinkle in my eye personally
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
before i have more than 20 followers on twitter does anyone want to admit they have a crush on me
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
it’s always something
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
17 days
less than 36 hours until mj lenderman album comes out and we can start Feeling A Little Off Fall
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
they should make a diet coke with 200mg of caffeine
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
9 days
there’s no way this is real they just made this up didn’t they
@PopBase
Pop Base
10 days
‘Fortnight’ by Taylor Swift feat. Post Malone wins the #VMAs award for Song of Summer.
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
tgif to those who celebrate btw
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
i have multiple plans a day most days and don’t keep a calendar my remarkable mind just pilots me where i need to go
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
10 days
i love reality tv. they’re like look at this 23 year old who sucks
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
11 days
kahlua shooter? dui scooter? i barely know ‘er!
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
14 days
everything was fine and then i had to pick out an outfit
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
just remembered there was an assassination attempt one week ago
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
never intended to get into sports but when i was offline i just had the espn app to fiddle with and now im talking about nba salary caps like that’s normal
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
the guy selling nutcrackers at the combination rockaway shark sighting/impending storm combo…. the human spirit is so resilient
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
‼️ DANIEL BOONE DIDNT ACTUALLY WEAR A RACCOON-SKIN CAP ‼️
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
20 days
love emily in paris….. not a problem that a boomerang in an ugly hat can’t solve
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
bjork on the headphones and the gym playing drake…… feeling of being whole ❤️
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
15 days
so called free thinkers when new mj lenderman album
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
9 days
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
i love my lowbie resurrection i get to just make tweets for my friends :)
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
watching the presidential debate is such a good way to get informed and decide who gets your vote!
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
purchased 4 different beverages already today light work for a guy like me
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
apple music algorithm helpfully recommending i listen to love story by taylor swift after the guess remix
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
it’s sooooo sad the ancient romans didn’t get to live tweet the collapse of their empire this is so fun
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
the meaning of life is dancing most likely
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
rip to the tiramisu guy but kinda crazy he was only 81 i thought that dessert was ancient wisdom
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
woodcock when alma made him that omelette:
@JoeBiden
Joe Biden
2 months
I'm sick
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
hi could i get 3 vodka sodas and pay with apple pay! thank you
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
love a dog that ages like milk
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
@megab00f yeah and i’m going to refer to it as going to grad school
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
mj lenderman
@quartzmorrigan
ratison jomes
3 months
they should make chappell roan for the guys
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
shelley duval jane birkin toby keith…… divas down :(
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
1 month
i don’t understand why there isn’t a tan line from my bangs
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
20 days
feeling off do u guys think it’s astrology or my gut microbiome
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
or maybe true love if anyone is interested
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maddie
2 months
@seriouslyfaith just close your phone and go to the club it’s not real
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
been really into the compass app. love to open it up and check out the directions
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
really glad i saved money by spending $30 on a few ingredients for dinner instead of eating out
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
godless
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
8 days
it’s me and my antacids vs the world
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
the shark is back :) that’s my girl :)
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
28 days
@galaxybrainnn they were doing this yesterday at alligator lounge lmfao
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
20 days
@megab00f some of your best work
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
@quasimatt i was just saying this
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
when i see a man in ganni i just. know they are hiding something
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
@chillwaveguy I f you know one thing about Daniel Boone, it’s probably that he wore a raccoon-skin fur cap. But alas, it turns out you might know zero things about the legendary frontiersman,
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
@megab00f came out today
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
@quasimatt i literally thought this was a meme i can’t believe it’s real
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
thank you @megab00f
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
@Rhynotic this isn’t the whole internet it’s just maddie
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
@seriouslyfaith @megab00f u can’t be mad if u have a date i’m sorry
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
@Rhynotic what are u putting in it
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
one thing dating apps have taught me is that 26 can mean so many things
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
2 months
@Rhynotic the fellas got to “i heard about shelley duval :/” last week this is a little something for the girls
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
3 months
@quasimatt wait actually let me revisit this
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@fettyschwapp
maddie
14 days
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