Baron Cohen Ke🇰🇪
@cohen_baron_ke
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Following
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Here for good times✨ l can,and l will, l believe that🙏 The blues Forever 💙 For business,ads & Promos📩 l tweet random thoughts & engage on your own thoughts.
Meru, Kenya
Joined October 2021
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Pinned Tweet
Kuna lawyer ameanguka kwa sewage akaenda kwa majistraight😂💔😂
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Kupiga luku ni kitu poa sana, nimeharibu hewa kwa gari wakaekelea jamaa fulani wa rasta😂😂
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Mnatoanga wamama wapi, jana nimejaribu mmoja hapo tao akaniambia kijana jifunze adabu na ujiheshimu😂🥲💀
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Your first time pale Kwa mjengo, wakati uliambiwa ulete gurumala ulileta nini😂😂
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Dem yako anaenda hossy kupima malaria alafu anarudi na kitabu ya clinic😂😂💀
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Huwa mnakulana na CD to prevent HIV right,,but ukijua dem ako na HIV uneza mkula na CD?😂😂
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Ni nini iyo ilifanya hamkuwahi dinyana tena?
This is a safe space.
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Ukinyonga na umalize in 3 seconds, shida ineza kua nini,for me l just blame arimis company😂💀
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Nashangaa mbona morio wangu haekangi kitu kwa status kumbe jamaa alikufa bana, na mkikufa mseme😂💀
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Dem ako na ukimwi hua anamake sure amekupea mechi na style zote zenye anajua adii ufikie penye ukimwi iko😂😂
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Nimedinyana for 3 minutes man, dem amejam but the goal was to satisfy myself haha🥲
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Nimerusha ngwati kwa Whatsapp family group kimakosa nikafuta alafu mzae akasema nimtumie inbox 😂😂💔💀
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I don't know who needs to hear this, but men with bright future are always broke in their 20s.
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Unachukua simu ya dem yako kuona kama anakucheat unapata nini yeye anakataliwa😂😂
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Wakikutoa Kwa line ya recruitment ya KDF walikuambia nini😂😂
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Uzuri ya mjulus ndogo ni haifikii penye ukimwi iko😂😂💀
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Ukiwa unanyonga alafu usikie mtoto wa jirani kwa dirisha atii,"leo hajakiss ukuta"😂😂💔💀
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Unapeleka mahari kwa akina dem unapata mama ake alikua dem yako mkiwa primary🤕😂😂
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Leo nimeamka naumwa sana na ribs, nikama naundiwa mamaa😂😂
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Broke niggahs unajaribu kupigisha dem jokes mbili tatu ndio akupende, simp nae anamtumia pesa anakuovertake😂🥲
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Kumbe pastor wetu hajui kizungu, ameaniandikia atii Jesus died for our scenes instead of our seens😂💀
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Madem wanaita pesa atii attention, atii babe mbona siku izi hunipei attention kama kitambo😂
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Nashangaa mbwa ya jirani imetoa wapi mimba na sijakua area for 3 weeks😂😂💀
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Between alcohol, sex, music na bangi which one relives your stress more easily?
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Sasa nyinyi wote mkijifanya hamna ukimwi,nani ako nayo sasa😂😂💔💀
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Unapoteza simu yako kwa club alafu mbogi yako inasema tuende nyumbani🤕😂💀
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@Degrata254
Enda mumias place inaitwa lumino, utapata iyo na 5k na upewe na kijana wa kukulindia boma
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Kila mtu ataoa malaya lakini jaribu tu uoe yule hajulikani😂😂💀
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Nikienda kununua gari tutaenda na mama angu ndio wakisema 4M, aseme tuko na 350k mbele na nyuma😂😂
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Uku tunajaribu kukataa iyo finance bill na mafala uko TikTok kazi ni kuimba tu hoozambe wakikaliana🤕
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Unapiga mkisii ngeta usiku unapata maganda ya ndizi ndio iko kwa mfuko😂💔😂
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Leo Mambo ikienda vizuri neza kua na ushirika wa kingono😂😂💀
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Natafuta dem ako above thirty years na hajaolewa aniambie alikua wapi wengine wakiolewa🤕😂😂
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Unadate mtu alafu unaanza kusikia rumours atii anakuwanga na ukimwi🤕💔😂
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After mechi alitoa vibrator akanisho "watch and learn something"💀🙄 waah hii nayo apana😂💔
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Those students who used to read like three topics ahead of the teacher hope mmepata salary ya April na May😂😂😂
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Madem wengi wajaka wako na hagaa lakini ni kama wanakuanga allergic to beauty😂💔😂
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Sisi ugly niggahs time ya sex inabidii uanze na backshots juu ukianza na missionary dem aneza ona sura yako ashtuke apige nduru akisema unataka kumrape😂😂💔💀
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Dem anakupeleka kwa mother in law unaenda unapata kumbe ni mumama wako😂💔😂
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Amekuambia anakupenda alafu akakwambia anakumiss sindio, siku moja utatii😂😂💀
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Caretaker wa lodgings ametaka kutoa ushuhuda Kwa kanisa watu wote wakakataa😂😂💔💀
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Another sign of poverty ni kuweka simu yako screen protector😂💀
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Uneza pata Kuna mtu mahali Hana ata 100bob Kwa m-pesa😂💔💀😭
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Unasema venye hauna pesa, kazi na connections na ukiambiwa kuna form ya usiku utoke wewe unasema atii unalala, wewe endelea kulala🤕😂
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Ata za Jana hazijashuka mnaniuliza uko wapi, kwani mnataka kuniua😑💔😂
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Normalise following back when you're followed. All accounts matters, comment your handles let's follow each other.
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Unapendana na Dem mkale vizuri mkiwa campus alafu siku ya graduation anakuja na bwanake na watoto😂😂💔💀
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Hawa niko nao hapa kwa super metro wanadhani tunaenda kazi pamoja🤣🤣
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Unanunulia Dem yako bra alafu unapata mamaake nayo😂😂💀
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Hatukatai maisha ni yako, lakini mbona ukunywe keg na Mandazi😂😂
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Kuna dem amekam sleepover na mtoi nifanye aje wakuu...?
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Unapeleka dem mluhya kwa restaurant, gasia inaitisha ugali moto na juice😂😂
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Mnapiga ka morning glory vizuri alafu kidogo kidogo unaskia landlord "malizeni alafu mlete pesa ya rent"😂💔😂
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Msichana uko campus na matako ni ya mtoto wa grade 3😂😂💀
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Bro unanyonga adii unaangukia vyombo, bana tafuta Dem😂😂💀
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Wueeh kumbe Sio hotel zote ukikosa kulipa na unachonga viazi🥲💔leo karibu wanidinye💀😂
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Unalia heartbreak na ulipata uyo dem na through pass😂😂
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Leo nataka nijiamshe pole Pole kama usingizi haijui nijiangalie vile hua nakaa nikilala😂😂💀
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Kuona nyoka Kwa nyumba sio shida, shida ni uzubae kidogo alafu ipotee😂😂💀
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Niko roof top na zimeshika beyond control zinanishow nisitumie stairs😂😂
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Ni methali gani we huona ni kama wahenga walitucheza😂😂?
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Jana usiku nilibuy avocado tatu kufika kejani nikakata ya kwaza nikapata imeoza, ya pili imeoza pia, ikabidi nizime lights nikule ya tatu
😂😂💔💀
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Leo mkienda sherehe msiniache amezima na keg nusu ya tumbler😂😂💀
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Fam let's do this, thanks.
#DonsalimOrg
Challange 📌
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Don't forget to :
1.
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Ni kitu gani crazy ushai fanya juu ya mapenzi?
😂😂
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Ukiona dem yako ananona ovyo ovyo mpee simu yako apitie chats😂💀
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Men ONLY;
Heri ukuliwe Dem ama ufanye supplementary exams😂😂💔💀
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One day I will be the big influencer on this app, mark this tweet!
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Hapo Kwa kutumia msichana fare heri nivute sigara na bangi alafu nijifungie Kwa nyumba na arimis 😂😂💀
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When a man is handsome, educated, rich but still single. What could be the problem...?
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Early birds tumeamka lakini hatuna pesa na connections ya kupata worms😂😂💀
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Unapea dem heshima yako yote alafu unapata anaoganga akitumia kagunia ka simiti😂😂
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Interviewer: We will call you anytime.
Me: Sisi ni watu wakubwa, mniambie tu kama kuna kazi ama akuna.
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CAT inakua ngumu adii unaamua kuandikia lecturer apo back page " l come from a humble background please"😂😂😭💀
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Ukiwa Kwa gari ukitravel alafu nyuki pia ziingie ndani si utakua unaenda Nanyuki🤔😂💀
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Fresher ameona sura yangu akaamua heri charger iende lakini sio simu😂😂💔💀
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Nimewahi lewa zikashika nikajiona kwa kioo nikashout , "mwizii"😂💔😂
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Uyo nae ashapost mama angu atii ndio girlfriend yake smh🤕💀
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Sai napigia kienyeji yangu uku ocha tumeet ananiambia wewe tafuta hao wasichana wako wa Nairobi😂💔💀😭
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Huyu nae ashanikula 200 na baado tuko talking stage, si heri ata ningenunua boxer ingine nikue na mbili buana🤕💔😂😂
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Sai fare ya kuenda Homabay ni ngapi mtu akiwa na homa yake😂😂💔💀
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So one day a boy will fall in love with my daughter and be afraid to meet me😂😂🙌
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Leo kama kawaida vitu mbili lazima zione dust,
1.Simps
2.Gamblers
😂😂💀
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Mimi nae siezi date mtu ako single, nataka nikutoe Kwa mtu, mbona hao wengine hawakutaki😒😂💔💀
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Comrades huombana pesa zingine adii unashangaa ni za nini, ati "niokolee na 7bob" 😂😂💀
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Mwanaume hufai kuenda kinyozi, mwagilia kichwa maji moto alafu utoe nywele moja moja ka manyoya ya kuku😂😂💔💀
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