claire
@clairernak
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bruins shmooins • 23 • she/her
in the soup
Joined February 2015
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Pinned Tweet
despite all my rage
i'm still just a rat in a cage
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i hate when other teams make a funny joke it should have been my team instead
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whoever said matthew tkachuk looks like a confederate soldier got the wrong florida panther
forcing my dad to watch hockey and yapping ab how much i hate sam bennett
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bobrovsky's mask is programmed to fall off every time the opponent has the puck in the panthers zone
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The Bruins were adamant that the Panthers wrongfully tied Sunday night's Game 4, however, Sam Bennett believes officials got the call right.
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talking? my brother in christ that's gonna leave a hickey
Sheldon Keefe talking with Auston Matthews after he officially finished the season with 69 goals 👀
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it's very funny that the red wings playoff chances hinged on a piece of information reaching john tortorella's ears, like a medieval kingdom falling because the messenger didn't make it in time
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nikita kucherov has singlehandedly become my favorite hockey player for being shown paul bissonnette and saying “i don’t know who this man is” with 100% sincerity
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congratulations to them!!!
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there's so much to mourn as just a stranger i can't even imagine what this is like to lose two sons, two brothers, husband, father
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in hindsight, this was a lot crazier than how it felt in the moment lmfaooo
On this day in 2018, Alex Ovechkin and the
@Capitals
celebrated winning the
#StanleyCup
in a fountain. ⛲️
(🎥:
@KGras13
)
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for all of the calmness and levelheaded professionalism sway was showing all series you can just tell from this clip that he was under so much pressure. good god i am so happy for this treasure of a goalie
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truly thought we had our first nhl hab for a solid 10 seconds there
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he forgot to unstraddle the man before acting innocent
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whoever wins this series i want the bruins to do this to tom wilson in the handshake line
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frantically grabbing the user’s manual to find out why my goalie is tweaking like that
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highlights for those who missed the Stanley Pup:
• Kucherov wins MVP with a hat trick
• Pastrnak awarded a Gordie Howe hat trick (2 goals, 1 assist, 1 fight worth a penalty)
• Mark Stone scored by kicking a naked doll into the goal
• Anders Lee scored twice and peed
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“i’m just a “HE’S JUST A
poor boy POOR BOY
nobody FROM A POOR
loves me” FAMILY”
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what do u mean demko snubbed swayman’s hug AND jt miller called him easy competition, canucks i wish you nothing but the WORST
Of course
@JeremySwayman
is spreading the love at
#NHLAllStar
. 😊
🇺🇸:
@espn
or
@ESPNPlus
➡️
🇨🇦:
@Sportsnet
or stream on Sportsnet+ ➡️
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objectively hilarious that they put this on national television but my heart broke for this little guy
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leafs fans when leafs fans when
the panthers beat the same thing
the bruins by being is happening to
dirty and annoying their team
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in 2016 patrice bergeron publicly supported a trans bathroom equality law and has consistently been visibly supportive of pride on bruins HIFE nights. love u patrice as well as other nhlers that stand up and choose kindness over hate or silence. happy pride 🫶
Bergeron &
@NHLBruins
agree, it's time to pass the
#transbillMA
. Everyone is welcome at a B's game!
#EveryoneWelcome
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i think i speak for the entire region of new england when i say i would want mike felger to pack his bags and leave this place forever
"I would want Linus Ullmark to go home, look at his two kids and say, 'pack your bags, Daddy's gonna go to L.A. and shove it up the Bruins' a** because they don't believe in me.'" 🤣
Mike Felger goes on an epic rant after the B's goalie shares why he want to stay in Boston
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me when the me when the
menswear guy is menswear guy is
dragging some dragging hockey
weird conservative's players with big
suits asses
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"the bruins goalies are fake, queerbaiting, PR relationship" linus ullmark knows that he's probably getting traded this summer because jeremy swayman played him out of a starting role and he still made a point to comfort sway every chance he got after that loss
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u know what my favorite thing is when emily kaplan says “thank you” to a player in their native language and the player is totally caught by surprise and disarmed for just a moment and they get all bashful and happy like yeah that shit makes me melt
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trying to babygirlify paul bissonnette should absolutely be a crime nobody wants to see that
1 ticket for 1 ticket for
Oppenheimer Barbie
please 💣 please 💖
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pat maroon so angry that his face is turning red ok how did this man fall in love so fast and how did EYE fall in love so fast
Pat Maroon was FURIOUS after Max Domi bumped into Jeremy Swayman during a commercial break 😳😡
(via Sportsnet)
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bertuzzi: "damn bitch y'all live like this?"
Frustration has started to set in for the Maple Leafs stars 😠
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jeremy swayman and jakub lauko emerging from kevin shattenkirk’s elevator after 14 hours
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other nhl teams: we have 3 different prospects projected to score 100 points within two years. if they don't they're a bust.
bruins: we're excited to hear that Masslesschaps McTallguy is getting even taller. with luck he will join the rotation of 56 4th liners in 5 years.
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i don't really know how to describe the way that johnny gaudreau is one of those guys that you have a funny picture of in your camera roll from like 2021 that you just never deleted because it brings you joy every time you stumble upon it again
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is the refs blowing a play dead to benefit the panthers just a regular occurrence now
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cry more anyway here’s some bruins who played pro hockey with painted nails
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jakub lauko just sitting there zero clue that his coach is behind him getting footloose
Jim Montgomery trying out for the remake of the “Once in a Lifetime” music video
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there needs to be a better word for the shaft of a hockey stick. the shaft of his stick? oh you mean his shaft? you’re talking about his shaft? of his hockey stick of course. the shaft of his stick?
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pre-arranged hockey fights are such a funny concept because why is matthew calling for pasta like they're getting ready to present their final group project
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unsung hero of the night goes to matt grzelcyk, who nobody noticed wearing pride tape but is still playing with it in the game (on the top of his stick)
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reporter: so charlie coyle is—
brad marchand: oh you mean the HOT ONE? the REALLY SEXY ONE? THE GUY WITH CHISELED MUSCLES? the man with the BIG BEAUTIFUL ASS?? my GORGEOUS TEAMMATE
Brad Marchand — speaking pregame on TNT — on Charlie Coyle's impact this season:
"Besides being an absolute rocket, extremely good-looking, he does it all. He's an animal. ... We see the work he puts in and how he dominates in practice. But now everyone is getting to see it."
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ullmark entertaining the crowd at tv breaks
Honestly if you’re not gonna let Ullmark play at least let him wave the flag. Sing the anthem. SOMETHING. I miss him!
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linus ullmark is subtly tailoring his gameday fits to be more and more evil rich villain each time until somebody notices
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every is auston matthews hot debate really just boils down to “is he wearing a helmet in this picture”
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i have nothing but respect for jeremy swayman for making don sweeney's day a little worse every single day
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we as hockey fans are now morally obligated to throw a water bottle on the ice in front of binnington whenever someone scores on him
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it's so cool how there's always at least one star player that gets taken out on a play like this in every series against the panthers regardless of team
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the cbj community has had to endure a lot more than most communities of fans. i hope as a greater sports community we can be there for them too
Powerful moment here. Fans pay their respects, then hold hands in a moment of prayer.
#CBJ
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as a fanbase can we agree to never let this go. i don't care if he somehow makes a move that fixes this mistake. this should be a fireable offense
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[jeremy swayman voice] in the td garden. straight up "hugging it". and by it, haha, well. let's justr say. my linuts
[launches into five minute story about the time he fought an alaskan grizzly bear]
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do you think ryan reaves gets embarrassed that his job hinges upon if he can succeed in begging children to fight him
rempe ignored his ass like reavo was selling something
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like imagine you're a citizen of DC and you have never watched a hockey game in your life and you walk by and there's just. a dozen drunk men. in the fountain. flopping around. one of them is extremely russian. and everyone seems to understand what is going on except you.
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you’re laughing. hockey players can’t play golf in ontario anymore and you’re laughing
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why does this feel like the end of toy story 3 where andy's toy-playing days are gone but he gives them to the little girl
Bruins goalies being besties??? Where have we seen this before 🤔 ....
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i don't gaf how much people want to blame swayman or his agent for this, it should be considered malpractice that sweeney didn't consider this scenario before trading away ullmark
Sources close to the situation tell me that while talks are ongoing, as of today (8/22/2024), the
#NHLBruins
and Jeremy Swayman are far apart in contract term (length) and dollar amount.
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I like hockey because hockey is where all the alpha on alpha action is.
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the way he says "you let that guy score on you" as if it's an insult... he's a first rounder with an impressive pre-nhl resume who was smartly held back for development purposes by the team because they see a future in him. learn the name steven.
“Sounds like a Bruin”
CORRECT Johnny Beecher is A BOSTON BRUIN
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i’m in love with isaiah seville even though i just learned who he is. jeremy swayman’s baby alaska brother. actually an angel just look at him
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my favorite thing about craig smith being kind of a journeyman is that every year or so a new fanbase discovers who he is and everyone from past fanbases comes together to renew the Craig Smith Is Incredibly Sexy vows and anoint new council members
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the brunette wags are revolting
Sra. Zacha, Sra. Grzelcyk, Sra. DeBrusk, Sra. Shattenkirk e Sra. Heinen
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every offseason the carolina hurricanes commit to joining the war on racism. on the side of racism
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wait guys guys
WHEN LINUS ULLMARK LEAVES THE SENATORS IN FREE AGENCY TO RE-SIGN WITH THE BRUINS IN 2025 >>>>>>>>
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dmitry orlov and garnet hathaway getting hit with a goalie goal on their first day in this locker room
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taxpayers shouldn’t have to fund arenas for millionaire sports team owners
the coyotes probably relocating is sad and sucks for both the fans and the growth of the league
both can be true
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time to break out my favorite tweet of all time again
A little playful jab from Draisaitl to
@SportsnetSpec
after Spec said the travel with a seven game series is killing the media saying "I don't feel bad for you" with a smile
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honest question, is there *anybody* on the florida panthers that isn't a complete asshole. like surely there has to be someone on that roster that's just a normal likeable guy... surely...
Really hard to see what set Brad Marchand off on the Brandon Montour goal--
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jakub lauko with grapes you have to stop. your smoke too tough. your swag too different. your bitch is too bad. they’ll kill you
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god finally took all of jeremy swayman's suffering and gave it to paul bissonnette 🙏🙏🙏
We knew it would come to this. Stay confident. Stay on your toes. Leafs Land get ready for the Marner Magic. 1959.
#BeLeaf
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brandon carlo said “NHL and NWHL” when answering a question i know this is the barest of the bare minimum but it brightened my day so much 😭❤️
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"jeremy swayman, hottest goalie on planet earth right now" exactly so true espn
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i hope don sweeney watches this on repeat and then lots and lots of videos about bonded shelter animals right after.
Jeremy Swayman on the trade rumors with Linus Ullmark:
“I mean, that guy is my brother for life. … Whatever happens, happens. We’ve dealt with it over the years. I mean, I don’t even want to think about that."
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unrelated to the immense pain that i am feeling rn but linus ullmark being so open and smiley even when talking about his heart being broken and not being afraid to use language like that is so rare not just for nhl players but men in general
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lock them all in a house for 4 weeks and make them do a series of increasingly difficult challenges that cause them to fall in love with each other while it's all live-streamed on television
These young stars are still waiting on their next contract 👀👀
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sam bennett sucker punched connor mcdavid in the face in the exact same way he did to marchand and nobody except bruins, rangers, and lightning fans said anything about it
If Barkov hit Drai like that all the local and national Canadian media would be calling for a suspension but they're all quiet now.
We will not be silenced.
#SuspendLeon
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garnet hathaway unwittingly triggering an entire circus act by the flyers as he politely sits there forced to watch it all spontaneously combust with a neutral face and wondering what the fuck he just walked into
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flashback to when they put chara (6’9) and brandon carlo (6’5) next to the two shortest NHL players
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this picture????? perfection
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swayman: frantically doing acrobatics to keep the puck out of the net
bruins defense:
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adding to my “jaromir jagr is the brother of boromir and faramir” thesis. he’s still playing pro hockey at 52 because he inherited that númenórean lifespan
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if i were joseph woll i would be crying and throwing up this is the worst comparison anyone could make
Joel Edmundson says Joseph Woll is reminding him a bit of Jordan Binnington:
"Just how calm he is. Yeah, I feel like nothing really bothers him as all &, you talk about St. Louis, that was kind of the same way with Binner. It’s cool to see."
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