Lifelong lover of single life. "SINGLE AT HEART: The Power, Freedom, and Heart-Filling Joy of Single Life," gold medal winner, Independent Publisher Book Awards
People who are
#SingleAtHeart
are happy and flourishing because they are single, not in spite of it. My book, “SINGLE AT HEART: The Power, Freedom, and Heart-Filling Joy of Single Life,” is resonating. Here’s some of what has happened in the first 8 weeks.
I'm 70, always have been single, always will be. The risk to the
#SingleAtHeart
is not what we will miss if we do not put a romantic partner at the center of our lives, but what we will miss if we do
We
#single
people have gotten unsolicited advice about how to be happily single our entire lives. That’s not fair to married people. They also need help. Here I explain how they, too, can be happy, even though they are married.
A study of 10 kinds of households found that adolescents did best when raised by single (never-married) mothers in multi-generational households; discussed here
@LenMandy
@inclusionist
The comments on this are great 🙂
If y'all wouldn't mind dropping a comment/quote tweet of where you met your spouse & a pic - people seem interested 🤷🏻♂️
We met on hinge 🙏
Just got my author copies of "Single at Heart" in advance of Dec 5 pub date. Celebrated at
@LoquitaSb
, one of my favorite local restaurants, with a friend visiting from the UK.
Here’s how
#single
people are flourishing, and how deficit narratives still prevail. I have been building up to this article since I first started taking notes on singlehood in 1992.
“When couples get discounts on insurance, memberships, rental cars, travel packages, entertainment, or anything else, and single people pay full price, single people are subsidizing couples. That’s singlism in the marketplace.” —
@belladepaulo
Better still, don't give romantic couples access to special benefits and protections just because they are coupled. Single people deserve the same perks.
#SingleAtHeart
Giving marriage-like perks to long-term, financially interdependent cohabiting couples is great, but what about giving marriage-like perks to long-term, financially interdependent live apart together (LAT) couples?
@TheRegReview
This essay I wrote for
@HuffPoston
being a lifelong single person at 70, and why so many people flourish when single, is really resonating. It’s the message a lot of people were waiting for.
#SingleAtHeart
book will be published tomorrow, Dec 5.
“When hospitals require patients to have another person (and not a taxi or Uber) drive them home from a procedure, and maybe stay with them as well, that policy can disadvantage anyone, but it is especially likely to disadvantage single…” —
@belladepaulo
RSVP- Tuesday, December 19 at 5pm 👉
@camforum
is in conversation with
@belladepaulo
and Fenton Johnson on making the choice of spending own's life alone.
When employers allow their married workers to take time off to grieve the death of a spouse, but do not let single workers take time off to grieve the people who are most important to them, that’s singlism.
Think single people are alone? Studies based on hundreds of thousands of people from dozens of countries suggest otherwise: The Social Lives of Single People | Psychology Today
“Single adults are perhaps the most overlooked group in the country in terms of thinking about strategies to alleviate poverty and food insecurity," says Elaine Power, a professor in the School of Kinesiology and Health Studies at Queen's University.
I’m 70, always have been single, always will be. Those of us who are
#SingleAtHeart
are happy and flourishing BECAUSE we are single, not in spite of it.
.
@KatiePorterOC
is a consumer advocate, a congresswoman, and my former student. We spent years studying how working families go broke after medical emergencies.
I’m grateful down to my toes to have her endorsement. Katie, I’m glad we’re in this fight together.
Feb 21-27 is Aromatic Aspectrum Awareness Week. Will there be less casual bigotry toward aromantics by the end of it? Maybe more awareness that aros exist?
@aromantic_aurea
Family leave needs to cover more than a spouse and children. Single people with no kids need to be able to care for others and receive the care they need.
We need to create an economy that works for everyone, not just the few. It’s time for a national commitment to good-paying jobs, affordable childcare, and paid family leave.
Women are 2/3 of minimum wage workers, 66% of grocery store clerks, 77% of health care workers & 93% of child care workers. This
#MothersDay
let’s show real thanks for
#FrontlineMoms
by ensuring child care, equal pay, sick leave, & access to quality, affordable health care!
My alma mater hosted an event w limited seating and said that the only guests allowed would be a spouse! I told them what I thought and they changed it.
@belladepaulo
you'll love this : just getting ready to send in a donation to my sorority but as i was reading the letter, it says, "we look forward to seeing you and your significant other at our next event" !?! oh well, i guess they won't be seeing me 🤦♀️or getting my donation😉
My
#SingleAtHeart
book is going to be translated into Spanish! The deal was announced back on Valentine’s Day. Didn’t think I deserved to mention it until I have the complete first draft written, but what the heck – I’m getting close.
How about including single people next time? There are well over 100 million of us in the U.S., and more than 36 million live alone. We put up lights and celebrate holidays.
@StephPenny1
@belladepaulo
Once at a larger dinner gathering, one patronising individual asked me very loudly (I assume to embarrass me in front of the whole table, still don't know why?): Sooo, when are you getting married?.. as the table went quiet I asked, Sooo, when are you getting divorced?
“We should think of our singleness as a point where we are happy, healthy, and whole. Once we’re in a partnership, you’ve now had to share yourself so you’re not whole.” --
@drkrismarsh
@shanisilver
@PeterMcGraw
#Sad
. News flash: You are NOT REQUIRED to be married or in a romantic relationship.
#SingleAtHeart
Is normalizing hatred what people do when they are scared to be single?
What matters more than a romantic partner to your psychological health?
I get asked about this a lot because I mentioned it in my TEDx talk, but there was not time to say much about it.
#Singles
In 1970, midlife US adults who had never married were rare; now they are common. I think that rewrites what it means to be
#single
. Research by Francesca A. Marino
@bgsu
, insights from Keturah Kendrick
@HappySingleGal
#SingleAtHeart
As a former public school teacher, Gov
@Tim_Walz
has never forgotten the people.
He fights for every worker and family that calls this country home.
I sincerely can't wait to call him Mr. Vice President. That Harris/Walz ticket is the one. Let's go!
To make this point, she did not think she could use her real name:
As cabin crew, I’ve had enough of pushy parents demanding special treatment | Meryl Love
So happy that “Single & flourishing” was a
#TopCitedArticle
. It is so important to transcend the deficit narratives of single life and to recognize the systems of inequality that advantage couples and disadvantage singles. And still, many singles flourish!
#SingleAtHeart
On average, single people are MORE connected to other people than coupled people are, research from national surveys shows. Single people typically are not alone. The
#SingleAtHeart
do appreciate alone time, and that protects them against feeling lonely.
while I am sympathetic to efforts to de-stigmatize singledom and to question the logic of the family which centers romantic coupledom, I do think it can also glorify aloneness to an excessive degree, and I say that as an introvert.
Nearly 40% of Americans can’t cover a $400 emergency expense. A trip to the ER or a car repair shouldn’t upend your life or bankrupt you. My LIFT Act would raise incomes for working families by up to $500/mo.
To the lady who laughed and said I looked sad dinning out alone at one of my favourite local restaurants this afternoon I have a lot of words for you. But I enjoyed my experience, and above all, I’m supporting a local business. I don't need a man on my arm to do that.
.
@UCSBpsych
academic affiliate
@belladepaulo
's research shows that for some people — the "single at heart" — life without a romantic partner can be even more fulfilling, allowing for more freedom to devote their time and energy to their true passions:
My
#SingleAtHeart
book got chosen by
@AARPas
one of their top books to read in December! (Wish my book cover showed up below, but if you click you can see it.)
Maturity is also understanding that you may be someone who flourishes when single, and not try to become romantically involved just b/c it is what you "should" do
#SingleAtHeart
Maturity is giving up the adrenaline of chasing love to settle into the ease of a true partner. Someone who pushes you to be the best version of yourself. Someone who invests in “we” instead of “I.”
Why is
@nytimes
only interested in how families use Alexa? What is the point of erasing the 37 million Americans who
#LiveAlone
or the millions of
#single
people who live with someone other than family?
@HannaIngber
“There are many more of us than people realize who don’t see living single or living alone as some sort of burden, but instead embrace it as something that we really just love”-- What I told
@CatherineCNN
. Research by
@Brownsl_BGSU
@FromPhDtoLife
Well, I'm currently working on an illustrated book about the history of women without children that looks like this ⤵️ I'm hoping to find a publisher for it 😊✨
For those of us who are
#SingleAtHeart
, our most brilliant life is single life. We are happy and flourishing because we are single, not in spite of it.
The stories of old told us this: that the hardest part is finding the right person and making them fall in love with you... and the easy part is living happily ever after.
Single people have true love in their lives. Romantic love is just one kind of love. And some single people are not trying to find romantic love -- they aren't interested.
If you can't find true love, work hard, make money and enjoy your single life in peace. Nobody has ever died from being Singe, but people have died from being with the wrong partner. Life is too short to be wasting your time with the wrong person.
#MondayMotivation
#mondaythoughts