T.S.
@TeeEss
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Literary Agent w/ Azantian Literary Agency and freelance editor. Mostly jokes + booktalk on here. 🏳️🌈 Witch-lover, gaymer, proud guncle, jovial. He/him
New York City
Joined January 2009
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バニーの日
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STEP DOWN FASCIST HASINA
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ブラジル
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ヒロアカ
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LINGORM MENTION TO U
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#يوم_الجمعه
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パンツの日
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長岡花火
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#MyLoveMixUpTHep9
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#Akatuskijapan
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デュエマ
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Rainy Mood with NuNew
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日本バスケ
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騎乗停止
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芝コース
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角田大河
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Fahrettin Altun
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Teddy Riner
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Osmar Olvera
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逆バニー
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#ビリスク
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ジュリオ
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Pinned Tweet
I'm not an editor anymore, I'm an agent, so...this, but query me instead. Link in my Twitter bio.
Authors, since it’s PitMad and I just liked a few pitches...if I like your pitch during a pitch event, it means I want to be on the sub list when you and your agent go out on submission.
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I’m just gonna go ahead and say it - if you have enough money to buy an entire other publishing company, you have enough money to pay ur authors in halves and not fourths and do more marketing. And don’t give me the “it’s an investment” line because so the fuck are your authors.
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Also, Jacob being in love with Bella because of the Renesmee egg in her ovary but not attracted to Edward because of the Renesmee sperm in his balls was a secondary travesty!
Jacob imprinting on a baby will still be one of the most insane things to happen in American fiction.
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Every copyedit I've ever gotten: You can't use 'hissed' as a dialogue tag unless there's an 's' in the sentence.
Every author (hissing): FINE!
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Pet peeve of mine is people using the word warlock to describe a male witch. Warlock means oath-breaker and is a word for someone who betrayed their coven. Bewitched made that shit popular. A male witch is called a witch.
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I just got the go ahead to let y'all know (it'll be announced officially soon) that I've joined the editorial team at JIMMY Patterson Books, working on MG and YA and possibly some pic books as well. Super excited to be back at Hachette after 10 years. It feels like coming home.
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It really is sad to me that an entire industry of people who loved reading so much that they chose a career in books has been so overworked and undersupported that they've lost their desire to read for pleasure. That is a serious tragedy to me.
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Authors, I’ve had this convo w/ author friends a lot so I want to say it again in case someone needs to hear it. You’re allowed to disagree with your editor’s notes. You’re allowed to question them and ask for clarification or STET the requested change.
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@_ElizabethMay
Right?! I loved that line to Jude Law's character where she's like "I dont have anything to prove to you."
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Authors are the Katniss: inspire revolutionary ideas, often want to be left alone, sometimes kill ppl
Agents are the Peeta: in the Games with you, constant support, helps you survive & stay sane
Editors are the Haymitch: gives you tips on how to improve your Game, often drunk
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As a Hachette employee, I walked out today with the
#LittleBrownWalkout
,
#GrandCentralWalkout
, in support of
@RealDylanFarrow
,
@RonanFarrow
, and all survivors of sexual assault.
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@julietescoria
@tyrantbooks
Not surprising at all. This policy is predatory and I say this as an editor with a traditional publishing house. Authors need advocates to avoid being taken advantage of. Working with unagented authors is fine. Refusing to work with agents is a MAJOR red flag!
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Never miss an opp to tell an author how important their work is to you. This can be a demoralizing business. They may need to hear it.
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Looks like my news is officially out there! I'm SO excited to be joining
@jenazantian
and the agents at Azantian Literary Agency, and opening to queries starting June 1st (once my time at Hachette has ended)!
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I just have so many thoughts and opinions after reading the Dan Mallory piece in the New Yorker. But most of all, I'm angry. I'm angry that the publishing industry is filled with highly-talented, overworked, underpaid honest people and this lying POS was making $200k a year.
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I don’t know why The Shape of Water is trending all these years later, but I am so glad the time has come yet again for me to use this inappropriate meme I made after watching it!
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@julietescoria
@tyrantbooks
Or hey, how about I don't and you can choose to take or leave my professional advice. As someone who has worked for publishers for over a decade I would NEVER sign a contract without an agent. OK for another author to choose otherwise but this policy is highly suspect!
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I just saw some tweets saying "don't talk about your successes publicly because it can be damaging and discouraging to others who aren't seeing the same level of success" and I'm sorry, but, NO! That is RIDICULOUS and I have something to say about that.
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@julietescoria
@tyrantbooks
I was actively warning you and anyone else who saw my response that this policy is incredibly troubling. You attacked with unnecessary venom. Not my problem if you don't want my advice but doesn't mean I'm going to stop giving it to authors.
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My sister gave all her dogs middle names so they know when they’re in trouble. 😂
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@julietescoria
@tyrantbooks
Then flail. I don't give a shit. But you're being hostile to someone who is trying to look out for authors. Which makes me think you must have a vested interest in this publisher.
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Just finished my last day as an editor & shut down my laptop for the last time. It’s bittersweet to be leaving a role I’ve been in for 15 yrs but I’m SO excited to start agenting. I’m honored to have worked w/ the authors I did and can’t wait to see what the future holds! 🥰📖
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Agents, please don’t do this. Authors jump through enough hoops only to get form passes or “no response means no” from us. Your query form should focus on their work. You can get to know their personality once you’ve read their MS and are interested in potentially offering rep.
Just queried an agent who had THIS question on their form:
What is one special item you would bring with you on a spaceship? (required)
That is a required question. I get that some agents want to come across as fun but the process is BRUTAL for writers and this doesn't help.
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@thatonequeen
She’s all the way back in seat 48Q. Maybe you should send her a Bloody Mary. 😂
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Ok, I've officially opened to queries. I won't be checking the inbox until tomorrow, but looking forward to seeing what comes my way!
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@afterall_net
@BudrykZack
@RottenInDenmark
Depressed and neurodivergent people can also be sharp, spiritual, sensitive, and ambitious. Those qualities are not mutually exclusive.
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I’m too impatient to wait until midnight to tweet this, but I OPEN TO QUERIES IN 1 WEEK! I’m really excited to start reading and looking for my first future client(s)! My QueryManager link is in my bio and on the Azantian Literary website. And my interest list is my pinned tweet.
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OMG, can we start a hashtag game?! I could use the distraction from Yoshi grief.
#RuinABookTitleInOneLetter
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It can be so damaging to share your work with someone who doesn't get your vision and tries to push you to shaping it into something they want instead. It's so important to find CPs, an agent, an editor who really get behind YOUR vision. It's your book---always remember that!
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@julietescoria
@tyrantbooks
I didn't ask for a thank you. I could've done without your disgusting attitude though.
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Why I think the world needs a Bellatrix/Narcissa/Andromeda Hogwarts sister story about how they drifted apart, met and married very different men, and joined opposing sides.
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For Knopf, just pronounce all the letters.
McElderry is mackle-dairy.
Also adding Hachette since I’ve heard people get that one wrong too. It’s ha-SHET, not hatchet or ha-shay.
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I’ve been finally reading and enjoying EVERY DAY this weekend and suddenly out of nowhere I was hit with a chapter full of fatphobia that left me so disgusted and insulted I needed to talk about it.
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Boyfriend really liked the
@heyjenbartel
pins I got him for his birthday. They suit his personality perfectly! 😁❤️
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This came to me uncredited via FB but to whoever wrote this originally I say, “Yes gurl! Spot on!”
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I'm really mad I'm seeing most of you talking about dick-shaped soap in a YA book box but I haven't seen the post it's all in reference to yet. Twitter really needs a "trace this shit back to the source" feature.
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Authors, I am begging you for all of your agents and editors' sake: number your pages, double space your manuscripts, don't use Courier New font, & run spell check before you hand in your drafts!
Disclaimer: None of my authors do any of this. My authors are perfect. 😜
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It's only Procrastination if it originates in the Procrast region of France.
Otherwise, it's just sparkling avoidance.
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Hot take: Instead of relying on exit interviews to get feedback once it's too late to retain unhappy/unsatisfied employees, execs and HR departments should make it safe for current employees to give constructive criticism without risking their paycheck.
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Almost everyone has heard of Jack Frost, but not as many people have heard of his tepid little brother, Luke Warm.
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@thatonequeen
The video headline: “Dr. Pimple Popper extracts growth the size of a small infant...and guess what!?”
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My sister, the bartender: What does Roy do for a living?
Me: He’s a barista.
Her: Oh, so he’s a morning bartender! We’ll get along.
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This! I spent years at a publisher bringing them bestsellers and award-winners and multiple starred reviews and spent years pushing them to be more competitive. I pushed for more elevated covers, I was doing sensitivity reads before they were a thing, I begged them to hire
PUBLISHERS!!!! START!!! INVESTING!!! IN YOUR TALENT!!! OR THEY WILL LEAVE YOU! & PROBABLY THE INDUSTRY ALTOGETHER! & THEN WE WILL LOSE THEIR TALENT!!! HIRE ENOUGH PEOPLE & PAY THEM WELL!!!! 😩
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I remain disappointed and upset about how much editorial talent this industry loses on the regular because of impossible workloads and salaries that don't account for the work, the overtime, the price of the city we all have to live in or around, etc.
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Dear Publishing Jesus, If you can find a way to keep me employed as an acquiring editor without any major gaps in paycheck that set me back in debt more than I already am, I will do whatever I can to make sure I'm never a submission black hole again! I really mean it! Amen!
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The editorial process in a nutshell:
Author: Do you hate it?
Editor: No, I love it! Here's a letter listing everything that's wrong with it.
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When bad publishing people die, their souls are sent to the Javitz Center for eternity.
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.
@kaity_nichole
Indifference to the racism of others is racism. Everyone who voted for Trump is racist.
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Someone suggested I consider agenting as a new career path bc I’m such an author advocate. I’d consider it but...how would I make $$ in the meantime. This is one thing I wonder about agents. HOW are y’all able to ever get started w/ low salaries & years of work w/o livable pay?
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@julietescoria
@JeremySzal
@tyrantbooks
I'm assuming his (and any other author's) agent are in their twitter bio to make it easy for folks to reach out for business opportunities. It's a smart strategy.
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Congrats on your book deal! How much did you get?
6 figs.
6 figures?! WOW, NICE!
No. 6 figs. Like, the fruit? They're paying me in fruit.
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@WaitHoldMyCrown
@NetflixFilm
The book is YA and the main character is 16. It’s perfect for her.
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So flipping excited to finally get to share the cover of
@DanaLDavis
's (
#OwnVoices
YA contemporary) debut, TIFFANY SLY LIVES HERE NOW, with all of you!
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When my boyfriend looks at me, he doesn’t see “fat.” He sees me. He sees my humanity, my heart, my kindness, my humor. He doesn’t look at my belly with disgust. It’s a part of me. To him I am sexy.
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My fatness has layers. I was mentally and physically abused by a parent as a child and food is comfort. My body also gains weight more easily than others. I was fat even when I ran 4 miles every 3 days and eating minimal carbs and sugar. My fatness does not negate my humanity.
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What’s absolutely infuriating about this is that pubs used the pandemic as an excuse to start doing this, with the idea that it would keep them afloat when book sales inevitably took a big hit. But books did better than expected in 2020 and they’re still pushing this. 😡😡
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This is what we talk about when we talk about harmful, poor representation. You owe your readers more and you owe yourself and your WRITING more! This chapter is a blight on an excellent book, which is a shame, and I’m going to now pretend it doesn’t exist so I can finish it.
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It is not anyone's responsibility to coddle sensitive people who can't handle when others get good news. This is an industry of rejection & perseverance. Stop comparing yourself to others and letting it spiral you. Keep ur eyes on your own paper. Everyone's journey is different.
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Like, look, you need to be open to editing your novel. If you’re not, that’s a problem. But our job is to help you make your book the best it can be. If we’re suggesting edits that don’t make sense for your vision, speak up!
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Canceling even $50k of student loan debt would change my life and undo a mistake I made when I was too young and dumb to know what I was getting myself into. Fuck those people who are like "but I already paid mine back. It's not faaaaair!"
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Finn wears XXXL shirts and size 46 jeans. I’m XXXL and size 40/42 jeans. Ties do not look ridiculous “ski-sloping off my stomach.” I look dapper AF, thankyouverymuch!
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Goodreads is so fucking pushy! I mark a book as finished and almost immediately get an email saying "YOU FINISHED YOUR BOOK! WHAT ARE YOU READING NEXT?"
Like, damn, I don't know, Goodreads! Calm down!
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I have self-image issues, but my sister thinks this is the cutest picture she's ever taken so I'm sharing it.
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With all the talk about toxic bosses and toxic work environments, I'm feeling very inspired to share, which might be not smart, but, well, neither is underpaying and overworking your entire stable of editors, so maybe that means I'm on the exec career track.
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The hot take of "you need to be mindful of how talking about your successes might be damaging and discouraging" is absolutely LUDICROUS to me! If you can't view the success of others without losing your own drive, it's going to be a tough life, esp as a professional artist!
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So this gorgeous book just arrived at the office and I thought I'd share a little backstory for authors who may be feeling discouraged. ACE OF SHADES was originally submitted to me and something told me I wasn't the right editor for it.
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First of all, yes, there is such a thing as over-celebrating or celebrating prematurely, but you should absolutely be proud of your successes, large and small, and not feel ashamed to talk about them.
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"I kneel before you, not as a prince, but as a man in love. But I would feel like a king if you, Danielle de Barbarac, would be my wife."
Me: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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Just because I’ve seen this question a lot today...the contracted JIMMY books will still be published.
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First of all, when I wake up I do not have trouble raising my head from the pillow or my arms from my sides or my body from the bed. I do not feel as if I have sacks of meat tied to my limbs. They are just my limbs.
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What’s happening is that kids are being given the language and knowledge to identify themselves whereas in the last they would’ve felt “wrong” and committed suicide, or ended up in doomed hetero marriages, or lived with trauma for years before being able to come out.
Daughter tells me her class has been discussing LGBT issues. One friend has since defined as “non-binary”; another has since declared she is bisexual and has “known it for ages”. The first is 12 years old; the second is 11. Genuinely wonder what is happening in our schools.
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I am in shock that there are people who didn’t know that Catherine O’Hara was in Home Alone, Beetlejuice, Best in Show, or The Nightmare Before Christmas (among others) before playing Moira on Schitt’s Creek. She’s BEEN an icon!!!
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Oh hey, look! My new job has been officially announced! And I'm right at the top! :-)
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I feel like now is a good time to mention I am actively building my list and have currently got my queries down to double digits. Not trying to be an opportunist, just want authors who suddenly find themselves adrift to know they have options.
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Your editor is your ally, not your enemy. Yes we have to represent the company’s interests and you should always keep that in mind, but you should never feel afraid or bad for wanting to discuss your edits.
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Just heard the news about
@Janet_Reid
and I am so stunned and saddened! I don’t even know what to say other than that this is a huge loss for the world and the community. May we all carry her legacy together into the future. 😭
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@RacCoonnorNSAID
@gecgnome444
@_Moonie23__
I’ve been to bars when that’s happened and the problem with that solution is that it also makes queer women feel uncomfortable and those spaces are for them too, not just queer men.
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Oh and it's also listed in my agency bio on the Azantian website, but here's a screengrab as well.
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@slayerfestx98
This might be internet suicide but...Spike was never as sexy as everyone made him out to be. Sorry!
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Me trying to figure out which editors have left the biz, gotten laid off, or switched imprints before sending out submissions:
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I guess the main takeaway I’d like to come from this thread is not to attack the author about this (please don’t) but to give an example of What Not To Do when writing your own novel. This didn’t cut deep for me bc i saw it for the BS it was but I guarantee it hurt other readers.
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Murder, She Wrote (For a Too-Small Advance, Until Her Editor Got Laid Off or Quit Because of Burnout and the Market Changed So Now She Writes Pterodactyl Erotica)
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@FuzzyWarbles
@ajplus
You mean back in 2002 when he didn't have any power to protect him from losing jobs if he spoke up, as an actor who was most likely already struggling against discrimination to get booked? You're wondering why, now that he's a coveted, award-winning actor, he's speaking out? 🤔🤔
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It feels weird to “announce” this on here but since I tweeted about him so much, I feel like I should mention that Roy and I broke up this weekend. 😢
I don’t want to get into the details or really even receive pity. We’re still close, so no hating him for me.
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I finally found a psychiatrist and got on meds for depression and anxiety, began pulling myself out of a deep mental health pit, reclaimed my love of reading, started catching up on submissions, and met my boyfriend.
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I feel nervous about tweeting this bc the author is a big editor, we have mutual friends, etc. But I’ve tried to keep my reactions to the work and not assume anything about the author. This book is 8 years old. But I’d call my friends out for this too and it needed commenting.
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There are books I've passed on that I get really excited to see in print. Authors, please remember that a pass doesn't mean we hate you or your art. There are a lot of factors in our decision to pass on a project and we can't always (or don't have time to) verbalize those things.
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She’s here! I’m so happy to introduce you to MY NIECE, Rose Helen Ferguson-Berg!! 😍😍😍
My SIL is exhausted and resting and my sister has been alternating between euphoria and updating us w/ pics. I’m the happiest brother/uncle alive right now! RIP to my to-do list!
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I accidentally scrolled too far and started liking PitMad tweets from 2020. Oops! 😅
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@TeacherOnTopic
@AmeDyckman
OK but, if I remember correctly, you need AT LEAST a Masters degree to be a professional pineapple.
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