Sama & TheLights💫
@SamaEmme
Followers
12K
Following
18K
Media
4K
Statuses
154K
Rugby 🏉 • F1 🏎️ • Fumbler • Redbull Racing • Nam🏀Blazers • Gallagher Chiefs• Bristol Bears • Baltimore Ravens • Halfback @Victoria_Sharks
Kampala, Uganda
Joined August 2011
What do you mean by you didn't put Royco in the last supper?????
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How I look at my crush knowing if I make a move she'll fly away
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Andrew Mwenda is like the Arturo of Ugandan politics. You wonder when his character is going to be eliminated but he's always surviving and staying around to annoy you the more.
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First family yeyongedde okulumya ab'emijoozi gya Arsenal 🏃🏃🏃
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Why must a doughnut have a hole inside it? We are being cheated. What's that space for?.#MbuzzaMbuzza
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Also that girl in Nabisunsa who sent our boy toilet paper inside mail for him to wipe his tears and shit we shall get to you some day.
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Emilian Kayima been holding back the truth for so long that it's starting to accumulate in his lips
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Kigongo decided to focus on himself. A young King 🤝🤝👏
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Bobi Wine's driver was shot dead by the Police in Arua and y'all kept quiet. Now y'all here 'standing up' against Police killings in the US. Kati mbu you're international freedom fighters? Mwefudde ba Avengers?.
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Gayaza girls when it's time for dancing at funcs.
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That jail time is equivalent to the time you spend at NIRA chasing after the ID.
DID YOU KNOW!. Refusal to register for a National ID can fetch you 5-year imprisonment or a fine of UGX 2,400,000/=.
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The difference between Flavia and Sheila Gashumba is that one of them turned down J Cole and the other is dating Fik Fameica. Levels😁
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Imagine you're Christine. You're in your room being ugly in peace and then boom! 😂
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Daddy Andre giving Kenyan musicians the same beat, but in Swahili.
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#ProphetElvisMbonye you have 5 hours to respond.
#COVID19UG: Pastor Robert Kayanja & Miracle Centre Cathedral to feed hundreds daily . Pastor @RobertKayanja of Miracle Centre Cathedral, has launched a drive to distribute basic necessities to the most vulnerable families. #VisionUpdates. 📷: @roderickahimb
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When Esther commits suicide and she finds her kids waiting on her like.
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Namilyango College must be the most affordable school at the moment. Meanwhile there is a class paying just 450k. 😅
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French babe: Je suis mignone. Kasito: You know Munyani???
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So Kadaga told that guy 'Come give me some head' and the guy brought a real head. smh 😂😂.
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You goat, rugby is a pastime. As you were fighting with TBWA, I was at Muk studying a profession.
Sama manufactures drugs ???? I thought that brother was a rugby referee
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Sorry, we are in Canada. We can't see anything😂.
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I was officiating the game between Smack and London College. One of the Smack boys tried to trash talk the Lando players by yelling "These are our men. These are our sures.".A Lando boy responded "Eeeh eh, for us we have girls.". There was no trash talk for the rest of the game.
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#HeyFreshers, if you've been the cool kid in your High school and now you going to Kyambogo, I'm sorry to inform you it's the end. Welcome to the life of 'Omuntu wa wansi'
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You don't even have a National ID olowozza ogenda wa? Kikoni?.
She is a game changer. Actually guys I am off to Canada😍
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Why's it that most best friend relationships one of the parties is fat and the other skinny??.#MbuzzaMbuzza
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What Kitende students have for breakfast, lunch and supper the week prior to cantab
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I can't wait for Enanga to tell us the #MakerereFire was caused by Hot water which was left in the flasks inside the Ivory Tower.
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They can see John Cena.
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A suitable Head for the Vision group 👏👏.
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LGBT 🌈 community repping?.
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#BlackPanther isn't as African as people claim it to be. It doesn't end with 'To God be the glory!' or 'Watch out for part 2. '
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Muhoozi's strategy is to throw parties into power. Finally a sequel to 27 Guns. 28 Parties.
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If my kids ever call me 'old fashioned' this is how I'll show up for their PTA meeting
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Update: The boys have laz all their games.
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So you telling me if Chris Brown woke up in Jack Pemba's body he'd think he's Lil Dicky??
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Serial Killer: Come out girl, I know you're in here. Gayaza girl:.Serial Killer: I promise not to hurt you. Gayaza girl:.Serial Killer: I have your comb.Gayaza girl:
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This is why we think USA built the wall on the wrong boarder. Don't joke with people from the Canadian Prairies 😂
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My mother gave birth to only two kids. I was the third- born. I was born on 32nd December 1990 S. #TweetLikeSpiceDiana
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In high school, Mpanga was caught dodging morning prep. So he hid in the water tank. The teacher asked him 'Young man, people are climbing spaceships to go to the moon, for you, you're entering water tanks. What were you doing there?'.Mpanga: Sir, I was looking for water.
Kiki kyolifa tewelabide?.
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#BadLuckCampuser wastes time during day, plans to read at night for the paper. Amasanyalazze negagenda. .
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Meet Edrisah Musuuza the first Ugandan (and definitely the last) to earn 4000 shillings, Used 5000 and saved 2000.
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When you're single and the DJ plays 'touch me very wello'
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Police spokesperson.
Is there any other job where people use so many words like politicians?.
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You ate the microphone?.
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Iyiiii baaba. Omwana omulabye. Yimbamu akayimba ka WBS. Bakuwe Cheers!
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The other day I saw sneakers here being sold at 220k. I went downtown and got the exact shoes at 80k. Mwe mwesiluwaze me I won't be part of your fraud.
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The moment it goes beyond 3k, it ceases to be a Rolex. That's a pizza!!
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Government to import Lake Cuba after our own L.Victoria failed to produce Sharks and whales.#CubanChallenge
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Namagunga girls becoming queens as Nabisunsa girls are becoming third wives. Habib take the wheel.
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'He thought about me and put his hands to use'. Kale mujooga!!!.
Uganda is not short of talent. This paint is by @AndyleeArts, a young man from Maganjo. He thought about me and put his hands to use.
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Kasingye: I'm a policeman .Gaetano & Lucky:
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Pastor Kayanja saw this coming and he named his TV Channel 44. You can't make this shit up.
Corona Update: 11 Watoto children choir test positive; brings corona cases to 44.
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This guy will use every opportunity available to sneak in a Motivation speech.😂😂.
Training with makeshift huddles didn't stop her from landing gold. You can start from where you're with what you have and get to your "promised land". Excuses are plenty, opportunities are not.
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But your thickness can be measured using a vernier calliper.
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Meet Aber Happy. The first Ugandan woman to return a hoodie.
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When the world needed him the most, he disappeared. Where's African Boy?
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Even Christine didn't attend?.
At mubs we believe that after tests, we need to rest the next day, 😌😌😂😂😂😂.Today's attendance in some courseunit lecture😌😂👇👇
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So in Law School if you don't pose like the Mona Lisa you don't contest or the pics are taken by Da Vinci himself?
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When you're about to 'attack' a group of Gayaza girls and then the Rubaga girls bus shows up
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Suddenly everyone wants to save Pallaso but tell them about the Ugandans in Wuhan. .
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An Insurance company to run an ad that reads: . Don't be like Kabushenga. Plan for your retirement today!.
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*The last Supper at Kyadi*.Jesus: The one eating kigere is going to betray me. Judas:
Imagine if bible characters were Ugandans?.
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This is it! I'm getting myself a wife. I'm tired of eating fries for supper.
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I thought this was a troll but nah fam. 47k is too accurate. That figure is rare. This clapback must be based on a true story
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Speaking of #RoyalWedding, let's not forget a certain Kingdom and their princess decided to waste our time. smh
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I went for a discussion today and a bedbug surfaced on my trousers. A girl saw and said out loud that I had a bedbug on my pants.I knew either I had to die in this movie or turn the bomb into bubbles. I did the ChandlerBing and said I'm from Nsibirwa,did you expect a grasshopper?.
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The only two lawyers who can get Sandra out of her mess
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Now that you have no girlfriend, how do you satisfy your pleasures??.Me:
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Ugandans: We are the Pearl of Africa. We are Corona free and Mbonye said Jesus told him it's not coming to Uganda. Corona virus:
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Blueticking = ignoring = Loneliness = depression = suicide. Break the cascade, reply the damn texts!!.#LetsEndSuicide.
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How many retweets to help you with your Homework?.
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One time I was suspended from school for dodging morning prep and my mum took me to Pastor Bugingo to pray for me coz she believed it was 'the devil's work'. Bugingo accused me of being influenced by 'peer groups'. in my head I was like 'bruh, a nigga was just tryna sleep man!'.
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Listening to Nobert Mau makes me want to read as much as I can and crave for knowledge. One day you're going to realise he was such an intelligent man and should have taken him more serious. One day you're going to question why he spoke for free. You'll realize he was a GREAT man.
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I thought Pallaso was a mature person, but him choosing to hold his concert on the same day as Alien Skin was so petty!.
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I asked my lil friend in High School (NGO) what school they were going to have sosh with. He proudly replied, 'We had an option of Sunsas and Gayaza, and we chose to go with Gayaza!' Legends, veterans, World war survivors, should I tell him??.
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