Jonathan Hansen 🐗
@RevHansen1563
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Following
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Statuses
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Christian, Husband, Father, Pastor, Reformed, Always Reforming. 🐗 bro. Maker of most accurate memes according to Haunted Cosmos.
Titonka IA
Joined April 2022
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Pinned Tweet
“I'm going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn't any Narnia.”
-the greatest literary character in history.
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Caspian has been admitted to the hospital. He is sick with RSV. It’s scary for him to be sick so soon after transplant. Prayers would be appreciated.
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His labs look normal for the first time in his life! The kidney is actually working! We cannot praise God enough. God has been so good to our family.
I hope I will be discharged today so I can see my son. He is a strong boy. He is still laughing and playing. God bless my son.
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Just watching “Penguin Sets Sail” on Canon + from
@canonpress
while I recover from donating my kidney for him.
Please pray for him (Caspian) as he receives his new kidney!!!
So glad I got to snuggle him!
Soli Deo Gloria!!!!
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He is one tired boy, but Caspian’s transplant was a success! His labs look better already. God has been so kind to us! Hopefully I will be discharged tomorrow so I can see him.
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@Col_A_Buendia
If you mean demon, not angel, then yes. If you mean angel, a messenger from God, then no.
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I finally got to see Caspian after he received the kidney! We are both doing well and healing up! His labs are improving and he might even be leaving the icu for normal care! Today he wanted to watch “Sir Badalot” from
@canonpress
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David French is a wicked man.
When we say regime evangelical, this is who we mean.
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Today I returned my cart. Did I do the Christian nationalism right?
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May the Lord turn this trash into a dung heap. May it be cut down and used as an outhouse 2 Kings 10:27
Psalm 83:9–10 ESV 9 Do to them as you did to Midian,
as to Sisera and Jabin at the river Kishon,
10 who were destroyed at En-dor,
who became dung for the ground.
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A conversation I imagine my wife and I will have.
Her: why is there a $2000 charge from
@canonpress
?
Me: just restoring Christendom.
Her: you bought the flamethrower, didn’t you?
Me: it’s pronounced “tactical snow removal.”
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Hey guys. Did you know Jesus regularly accused the Jews of murdering the prophets? Did you know the apostles accused the Jews of murdering Jesus? Guess they were antisemitic too. Who knew?
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Okay, when is
@TuckerCarlson
going to interview
@PerfInjust
?
Cause man alive I would love to see that.
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One kidney each, whole lotta charm. So thankful for God’s grace!
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I would pay that even if they never updated it again. Do you guys even understand how barren the theologically robust market is?
@canonpress
is one of the ONLY places providing real education and entertainment. I will gladly support them. Death do Disney. Long live Canon.
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@RollingStone
If this picture of the young Captain of Gondor absolutely ripping a heater gets more likes then
@DustyDeevers
is based and your post sucks.
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RWW has become a
@rightresponsem
advertisement agency and I am so here for it.
So based
Christian nationalist pastor Joel Webbon says Jews, Hindus, Muslims and all non-Christians should be banned from engaging in public displays of faith because "public displays of worship to false gods ... bring reproach upon the nation."
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The
@New_Christendom
conference was amazing. I’m sad I had to leave tonight, but I shall return. Next year, with the whole family! God has blessed me greatly over this weekend. I’m returning home now to continue plodding on in building a Christian borough in Iowa. DEUS VULT!
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@jdunwell
You will answer God one day for defending paganism over Christ. I fear for you.
I wish you viewed God as holy and believed in submitting to Him in your office. It is evident you do not believe Christ is Lord over your office. Repent, I beg you!
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I now realize that the men who told us to “read the reformers” only wanted us to read them on soteriology but not on the theology of marriage or baptism or especially on political theology.
We didn’t listen. We will learn from our fathers on all these subjects.
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Power outage? Time for the based kind of sermon prep.
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Today is the Lord’s Day!
It is also White Boy Summer!
It is ALSO the day we celebrate the patriarchy!
Patriarchy=Father rule.
From henceforth, we shall refer to it no longer as “Father’s Day.” We shall refer to it as Patriarchy Day.
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The state of twitter right now…
Perfectly rational Christians:“I personally believe cultural Christianity, while having challenges, is far better than transing the children.”
Response:
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Mission accomplished. 🫡
Another covenant child due March of 2025.
How's everybody doing on the
#GetACutiePregnant2024
challenge?
If you complete this challenge, I will happily be the godfather to your child.
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The Texas border debacle is 100% a trap. The feds are begging for action from Texas. But with that said, I quote Gandalf.
“‘We must walk open-eyed into that trap, with courage, but small hope for ourselves.”
— The Return Of The King:
Resistance to tyrants is obedience to God.
@GregAbbott_TX
interpose. Secure the border. Arrest all who cut the wire.
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Riding in the car catching up on the
#justthinkingpodcast
. I look back and see my 9 month old son smiling and giggling as
@VirgilWlkrOMAHA
and
@D_B_Harrison
are laughing with each other. It hits me what a joy it will be to raise him listening to faithful men.
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@spanglermt
Tell me you’ve never read “Voyage of the Dawn Treader” without telling you’ve never read “Voyage of the Dawn Treader.”
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@ScottAniol
is proving
@PerfInjust
’s point. WASP have no place in our society. We are not allowed a people. Scott is agreeing with this AND in essence calling it good.
The evangelical elite are not your friend.
"We have no place of our own."
Yes we do. It's called the Heavenly Jerusalem.
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Enjoying a fire, cigar, and old fashioned as we usher in the Lord’s Day. May God be glorified.
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@realDailyWire
My reaction to the
#sexstrike
as an orthodox Christian who believes what Scripture teaches. That sex is between one man and one woman, and is to be reserved for marriage and seen as a sacred union.
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Just got out of surgery donating my kidney for my 2 yo son. I am in pain but at least I have
#nqn
from
@canonpress
and
@HauntedCosmos_
to listen to! Praise God!
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Taking our son the hospital across the state. It appears he has a fairly dangerous infection at his dialysis site. Please pray for healing, safe travels, and wisdom for the doctors.
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John Calvin possessed a beautiful love for those with whom he differed.
He said of Luther that even if Luther were to call him a devil, he would still love him.
We must cultivate this again.
Calvin on Philip Melanchthon:
"Phillip Melancthon, now dead, a man who, for his incomparable knowledge in the highest branches of literature, his deep piety, and other endowments, deserves to be remembered by all ages."
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It amazes me how the men who taught us to read the reformers are mad we read the reformers.
(This is a tweet about James White)
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It was a rough day. Really no improvement in Caspian and the doctors made stupid mistakes that made things worse. Good thing the Lord is our comfort because without Him we would have none.
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Crush liberalism. Build for future generations. Train your sons to be men.
Dues Vult.
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I viscerally hate hearing people say “life is over when you have kids.” I didn’t know what a fulfilling life was until I had kids. They are a blessing from God.
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Wow, a literal “straw” man argument. Lol
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@libsoftiktok
When your phone auto corrects to “I’m taking the kids to meet Satan” instead of Santa
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I am blessed by all the love given over these past days. A special thank you to all those at Canon!
If anyone swings into north central Iowa, hit me up. The bourbon will be ready, and I’ve got a pretty sweet new cigar lighter.
Everyone make sure to congratulate the winner of the Special Reserve Edition Flamethrower:
@RevHansen1563
!
We are officially putting ice and snow and principality and power on notice in North Central Iowa.
#GripItRipIt
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From online bros to real life friends. Honored to have met this bro. If you are not following what
@haymes_joshua
is doing, you need to be. Honored to be temporary roomies this weekend.
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I am a Native American. So are my sons 🇺🇸 🇺🇸 🇺🇸
I am a Native American 🇺🇸 🇺🇸🇺🇸
(I’m probably doing this wrong)
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@Brian_Sauve
I will have you know that my two year old loves the Dragons record. He often asks “sing blue?” For the blue record or “sing drag” for sing dragon. He giggles and watches it go “round and round” every time I put it on.
This is how we build Christendom, brothers.
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Reminder: women can’t preach. Even today. Women “pastors” are neither godly nor faithful.
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Israel is the evangelical golden calf. It would be ironic if it weren’t so horrific.
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The ideal toasted marshmallow. People who burn them on purpose are probably democrats.
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Woke Christians: You can’t say the Bible is clear on sexual ethics! The Bible is very ambiguous! It can mean almost anything.
Also woke Christians: The Bible is extremely clear that we have to love everyone and never judge anyone.
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It looks like Alfred the great is the third man on the couch. Very fitting.
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@ChristFirst11
1. You can lose your salvation.
2. God is not sovereign.
3. You have to speak in tongues to be a Christian.
4. You can teach the gift of prophesy.
5. I suffered health troubles because of my lack of faith.
6. Woman can be pastors.
I could keep going but that’s probably enough.
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This is your reminder that if Israel rebuilt the temple and began offering sacrifices, it would be an abomination. Christ is our perfect sacrifice. The church is the temple of God.
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The NCP conference has already been amazing. It’s so great meeting all the Twitter mutuals.
@Eric_Conn
blinked but
@DanBerkholder
is wide awake!
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You know life would be better if it were like this. So get to work and make it like this.
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All the women of both sexes upset over
@rightresponsem
’s talk at
@New_Christendom
watching
@PerfInjust
’s talk now that they are all public
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@jtdxn_
Bonhoeffer is highly praised by most evangelicals, but they overlook that he embraced multiple heresies. He denied a lot of core doctrines.
He denied the inerrancy of scripture, seemed to deny the gospel being about salvation, denied the resurrection, the virgin birth, etc
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Eric triggering all the pew feminists by simply quoting scripture is my favorite sport. I hope to join JV soon. 😂
Man was made first. Woman was made from the man and for the man.
Man was not made for woman. But woman was made for man.
Man is the glory of God. Woman is the glory of man.
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Squatted my body weight today. Christ is King. Train body and mind boys.
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@smashbaals
I bet these people would complain if they had to sing a five verse hymn. The modern American church is beyond anemic.
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@theBaxterian
@pastoraldoleon
He obviously has 0 theology of natural affection and it shows. We need a better class of minister.
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@ScottAniol
If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.
James 2:15-17
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The talk from
@PerfInjust
was absolutely fantastic. Knocked it out of the park. Thank you sir.
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Women get awfully worked up when you tell them that they can’t commit murder.
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Why are so many young men who have looked up to Dr. White so disheartened?
Dr. White to Muslim God haters: kindness.
Dr. White to
@PerfInjust
, a God fearing confessional Christian: vitriol.
@mohammed_hijab
I guess you didn't get my email last year? I asked one of our mutual friends for your email address, but I did not hear back from you.
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I am checked out of the hospital! Hallelujah! Can’t see Caspian yet, but God willing I can soon.
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I’ve had many people try to concern bro me about
@douglaswils
or
@canonpress
in my time in the ministry. Folks like this are all bluster and no substance. And most of the time, they willfully misrepresent or outright lie. Doug and Canon are thoroughly orthodox and beneficial.
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Venison I shot, local beer, covenant family. We are so back, kings! 👑
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Seeing alot of “Moscow man bad” and concern bro-ing today.
So let me just say, I like uncle Doug.
Federal vision is not heresy.
Moscow is doing wonderful work for the Lord.
All the hate pretty much boils down to cowardice or lies.
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Hear me out….
What if Santa is real but he is a calvinist and therefore recognizes that everyone is naughty so that’s why he never actually delivers toys?
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2024 is here.
Glory be to the Father,
And to the Son,
And to the Holy Ghost.
As it was in the beginning,
Is now and ever shall be.
World without end. Amen, amen.
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Cannot believe the comments here. My man is simply quoting Luke 16:18 and man he is catching heat. People lack even a base understanding of Scripture and it is sad.
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Who are your favorite smaller reformed accounts? Under 1,000 followers.
Bonus points if they are under 750 followers.
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FYI $10 a month for this kind of content is an amazing deal.
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I love how much people are losing their minds over this. Comedy gold.
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