Soggy Sack Jones
@NamesAreHardAZ
Followers
362
Following
396
Media
697
Statuses
3,342
Cursed to love Arizona sports. Sometimes I just like to say mean things on the internet.
Joined May 2024
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@declinerspike
@messy_mustard
The kinda hoe who would blame herself and beg for you to come back.
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@audioguy182
Nigga posting random bitches faces on the internet and calling me a creep. Unreal. I was only trying to help Brian.
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@BarryOnHere
If you are in a position of power, she will suck your dick. I think that’s a positive thing because I’m not married to her.
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@whstancil
I for one will not be the least bit surprised when you are busted for pedophilia. Someone check this man’s hard drive STAT!
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I’ll never understand people stupid enough to need a calculator for a tip. You can’t guesstimate 20% and round up in your head? You can’t move a decimal point and multiply the dollars by 2 in your head? Insane you people have jobs and vote tbh.
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@JosephManero
@Sundevilguy2020
Texas food is trash in general ngl. Decent bbq. That’s about it.
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Pie contest in 2 weeks. Preparing to defend my crown! Can’t decide between doing an apple crumble, mixed berry, or cherry pie this year. I did blueberry last year and won 1st so I gotta mix it up.
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Canceling homedepot employees making $14/hr for saying something you find offense is incredibly gay.
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@Howlingmutant0
@AaronRegunberg
Goats and camels don’t have the same taste as horses… or so I’m told…
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My wife is adamant about viewing my Twitter since it older her pharmabro threatened to sue me. She’s never seen my tweets before, It’s never been more over.
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The fact that this doesn’t have a million likes and instantly catapulted me to internet fame and fortune is proof I’m already shadowbanned. Smdh.
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Shit like this is why I had to LoJack my wife. (Stuck an AirTag in her snatch)
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The face you make when day dreaming about pedophilia.
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House gunna smell like fresh apple pie this morning. 🤤
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@MartinShkreli
@_d3f4ult
I was so ready to blindly take this douchebags side for the lolz but… I can’t associate with these people.
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“Your honor, I did not have sexual relations with those children.”
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@JarrettGC
The last thing a bottle of bourbon sees before being chugged behind the wheel of a moving vehicle.
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I’m retweeting a lot more now so you can all still see the vile bigotry and degenerate activity I love so much.
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There is no offense so small the State won't kill you over.
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Brisket is probably the most overrated cut of meat ever
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@TheExMoCringe
Why is it always the dried up bitter libs that respond with the dumbest comments imaginable?
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@ClueHeywood
@HowardMortman
That’s not him Clue. He has been replaced by a lizard wearing a human suit.
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I’ll have to make it prettier if I want to win next weekend but this is the first go with a new recipe . Flavor first, then looks. Pie
#2
after a round of golf. 🫡
House gunna smell like fresh apple pie this morning. 🤤
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Somebody rang my doorbell so I answered the door and it was my mother in law surprising us with a 3 week visit.
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Last blueberry pie of the season 🫡
Pie contest in 2 weeks. Preparing to defend my crown! Can’t decide between doing an apple crumble, mixed berry, or cherry pie this year. I did blueberry last year and won 1st so I gotta mix it up.
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@Bickley_Marotta
The hottest team in baseball! Won all 6 series since the all star break. 14-4 in that stretch.
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This filthy, haggard bitch will sex you for 5 drinks and a meal at Waffle House.
“Would you date a guy that makes $75,000 per year in Miami?”
🔊
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LMAOOOOOOOO
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We need some good vibes at the ballpark. Who wants to go to a game on
@Burritoexp
Just retweet and post your best gif of all time, whatever it is. We will pick a winner on Thursday⚾️RETWEET💯
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Just found out that now my brother in law is coming to visit for part of when my mother in law is here and staying after she leaves. It will be 6 weeks in a row with people in my house. Her best friend for a week, 3 weeks of MIL, and 2 weeks of BIL. I think I run a hostel now.
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@MartinShkreli
Requirements:
Must be under 18 and willing to live in an apartment (cameras in the toilet) we leased for you.
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💀💀💀
When the Prius driver beside me asks me to stop revving my Chevy Silverado
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@MrOverpaid
Remember when you told your followers to yolo their life savings into $WOOD and then you and your homies rugged them? Crazy.
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Same thing I do everyday I wake up, crank hog.
You wake up in Stephen Curry's body.
What's the first thing you doing?
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One of the biggest companies in my market just got bought out for 100 million....
VC backed waste companies are buying out companies all over the country right now.
Time to take their customers 👿👿👿
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We need more of this.
BREAKING: Citibank staff punches peaceful climate activist in the face for taking video. He was taken to the hospital bleeding.
@Citi
keeps proving their violent business is rooted in violent people. This can't go on.
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Lmao the French are so gay it’s insane.
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@MrOverpaid
Bro getting cooked so hard he’s paying people to tweet about him being a good guy. Down incredibly bad.
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@coolandfunray
Not even these guys would sell pictures of them fingering their asshole on the internet for $2.99 a month. They have dignity.
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Wife just asked me if something is leaking and I said “that pussy about to be leaking”. She just stared at me for about 30 seconds and left the room. Marriage is awesome.
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@TrollsByDennis
@TheOmniLiberal
Looks like the kinda guy that would hold her hand and watch too.
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💀💀💀
Japanese newspapers’ guide to Democrats and Republicans
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@EthanEvansVP
Ethan, you should have slammed a handle of vodka and then killed your boss and your whore wife instead of crying on Twitter.
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Get fucked.
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