Metz
@Metz4Real
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If I made you laugh or think, please Retweet 🔄 I'm just settin' picks at the Free Throw Line of Life. Harris-Walz 2024 💙🌊 Let's Make X Sane Again.
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@CoreyRForrester
"Why am I listening to you . . . what have you ever done?" Burr is saying what we've all been thinking for three decades.
Bill Burr displaying once again that he’s that dude
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@RpsAgainstTrump
Nothing bespeaks a comprehensive knowledge of nuclear physics like "I knew I understood nuclear for a long time."
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@Joe_Hugen
Actually, I think she threw a fit, ran over a fan, then realized she'd better look like the victim.
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@CBSNews
For anyone opposing this verdict: At the bottom of this slippery slope is a pool of parental accountability. That's good for society. ⚖️
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@KamalaHQ
Real men show our support for our daughters, wives, mothers, and sisters. Donald Trump's and JD Vance's disdain for all women is on display daily. Real men will vote for Kamala, and help the women in their lives move forward.
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@KrangTNelson
Maher couldn't imagine Burr's childhood friends were funny. Burr redirected him.
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@ArtCandee
We need to get
#ThankYouWendy
trending, because . . . Thank you, Wendy for kicking that molded heap of dung off the flight.
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@joncoopertweets
The Imperial Ball Room of Emperor Dufus Maximus.
This is the room at Mar-a-Lago where Trump held his unhinged press conference yesterday.
Describe the room in ONE word.
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@gunsnrosesgirl3
"Thank you for your patience. Your item has been drop shipped."
According to a World Shipping Council report, up to 1,382 shipping containers are lost at sea each year
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@BrianDMcBride
When the greatest orator on the planet drops your mini-manhood on your head! Pray for Dinky Donald. 🙏🏻
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@KamalaHQ
His stupidity is breathtaking at a level we've never seen before in this country
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@megynkelly
While your bigotry is sad, knowing you're frustrated by the result makes it worth it.
Holy shit. They really did it. They gave the women’s gold medal to a MALE BOXER. I can’t with this shit.
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@TalkinBaseball_
Pete Rose had 4,256 hits. He was 1 interpreter short of being in the Hall of Fame, though.
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@Cauble
@washingtonpost
"The lady doth protest too much, methinks." Bill Shakespeare
Kim Mulkey with a lengthy statement regarding a forthcoming article that the
@washingtonpost
is working on.
#LSU
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@AP
Nothing says "I'm working for the average person" like "Trump's private golf resort in Bedminster, New Jersey." The campaign is in shambles, and I dig it. 😂
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@highbrow_nobrow
@Acyn
New Children's Book: "Diaper Donny Talks to Trucks"
"'Vrrrrroooom,' said the truck."
"'I understand you, probably better than anyone,' said Diaper Donny."
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@atrupar
"Cars loaded with as many as two people flocked in what some described as 'tens maybe a hundred' tepid followers just hoping to get a glimpse of the old man while he's still out awaiting sentencing."
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@AP
Harris will Walz into the Oval Office.
BREAKING: Kamala Harris picks Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz as running mate as she looks to boost Democratic ticket in Midwest, AP sources say.
Follow AP's live updates.
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@Logically_JC
That guy's gonna have to sell a lot of his vintage tank tops to afford a new TV.
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@NYMag
Kids, don't take comedy or culture advice from something with "magazine" in its title.
Democrats should ditch the J.D. Vance couch joke, though it got a laugh when Tim Walz repeated it at a rally with Kamala Harris. It’s beneath elected officials, and not that funny to boot.
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@joncoopertweets
Jon, I thing there's an overall messaging problem when the candidate says:
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@JimRussellSD
Pete Rose has 4,256 hits, but came up 1 interpreter shy of the Hall of Fame.
Ohtani accused this guy of “massive theft” just hours later lol
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@highbrow_nobrow
We had a family meeting to figure out what to do about grandma. I didn't ask our dog. Does that help you understand, Kev?
Kevin McCarthy: I have been the leader of the Republican Party and the Speaker. Never once did Kamala Harris ask "What are your ideas, what should we do?"
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@MarchMadnessMBB
@CSUMBasketball
@UHCougarMBK
@KUHoops
@MarquetteMBB
@Memphis_MBB
@NUMensBball
@Vol_Hoops
@TexasMBB
@aggiembk
@UConnMBB
There isn't a shred of legitimacy in this list with Braden Smith not on it.
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@timeimmemorial_
Give Danny Baldwin another chance to take Sir Ben Kingsley to acting school!
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@yashar
Historical achievement for
#HarrisWalz2024
Keep rolling! 🌊
NEWS
The nation's oldest and largest Latino civil rights organization, the League of United Latin American Citizens (LULAC), will do something it has not done since its founding in 1929 — it will endorse a presidential candidate, CBS News has learned.
The organization's
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@acnewsitics
@SulliedMe
Check your math on Vance. Spot on about the other two weirdos, though.
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@GeraldoRivera
Geraldo, why didn't Donald get us out by January, 2021, as he'd promised he would?
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@AaronParnas
The toughest job on Team Harris: picking which of Donald's incriminating clips to use. They could do the rest of the campaign "In Donald's Own Words."
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@awfulannouncing
Pat's voice sounds like a moped being kick-started, and he looks like he'd ride said moped "chasing tail" as he would call it.
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@TheSopranosClub
"He made a bet. He lost. He made another bet. He lost again. He made his final bet. It was a push."
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@GaryVanSickle
And he got paired with a guy who recorded him, then posted it on social media.
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@TheRichFromCali
"The State of New York probation department would like a word with you, Donald."
So it seems that Donald Trump is threatening to leave to Venezuela if he loses the election.
What do you tell him?
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@highbrow_nobrow
@atrupar
He's more in love with his phrase than he is with his country, or any of the people in it.
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@acnewsitics
Can't wait for Dinky Donald to refute his mini-manhood tomorrow. It'll be small hands all over again!
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@hwinkler4real
🎶"Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun."
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@mckaycoppins
It's much more mystifying to read "Apropos of nothing . . ." in 2024.
Apropos of nothing, I'm mystified by the number of normal, smart people I've encountered who believe the J.D. Vance/couch thing is real. Like, to the point where they think the reason you can't find it in the book is because the publisher has memory-holed it. Guys! Come on!
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@jonathanchait
Seems like a you problem, Jonny.
Does Harris understand the assignment? Before Walz, I was cautiously optimistic. Now, more cautious, less optimistic.
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@IngrahamAngle
Or, or . . . hear me out here: very rich people don't care if democracy is threatened as long as it's good for them in the short run.
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@HeroDividend
Does your neighbor realize how offensive it is to see people running when they aren't being chased?
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@ChrisCillizza
If she picks Walz, Shapiro will still campaign hard for her in PA. PA voters aren't going to punish her for not putting Shapiro on the ticket. If he's that great, they'll be glad he's staying their Governor.
It's VP decision day for Kamala Harris.
Just a reminder: This is what the map looks like if she wins NV, AZ, MI and WI but loses PA
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@CalltoActivism
"They stood there, cheek to cheek. Donald John Trump, and the fly he calls Very Smart People. Donald knew they must stick together, for that was his last remaining friend."
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@ohnohedidnt24
Like a parent who caters to their wayward child at the expense of all their siblings.
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@bruce_steiner
"Is he fit to serve . . . ?"
Yes. ". . . pancakes in the chowline at Riker's Island."
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@SaraGonzalesTX
FALSIFYING BUSINESS RECORDS IN THE FIRST
DEGREE, in violation of Penal Law §175.10 x 34. Any other questions?
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@RealBraxtonM
@UMichFootball
For you Michigan apologists, let me translate "Michigan cheated. We all knew it. We're all going to help prove it, because we all observed it."
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@TheRealThelmaJ1
The placement of his tiny orange hands in this photo is terribly uncomfortable to look at.
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