Come see my in Santa Monica Saturday, November 18! I’m helping my 94 year old friend with her yard sale! Let’s take a selfie! 1023 17th St, Santa Monica 90403
1 MILLION HUGS! I Got my first vaccination! Schedule yours when you’re eligible. I make a commitment to give 1 MILLION HUGS once we’ve worked together to get through this. Seriously, I’ll set up a booth and give 1 million hugs. Share this, let’s go anti-viral! Make it happen!
IRS: You owe us money
Me: OK, I’ll pay it online!
IRS: The last name you entered does not match
Me: Ummm, I’m pretty sure I know my own last name
IRS: Don’t talk back. You owe us money.
FLORIDA! I’m coming back and I can’t wait to see you! See me make fun of
@dtamberelli
and relive the youth you thought you’d lost because now you have a job.
@NostalgiaShow
I like the library. You can read all the Lemony Snickets for free! USA! USA! (The first library was actually in Nineveh, capital of Assyria and created in 7th century B.C.) 📚 🧠 🤫
I can’t get a date, so this heartwarming video about a lonely camel becoming best friends with a rescued cow is just a slap in the face.
#wheresmycamel
Overheard just now at 7:11:
Hot Girl: Is that the only champagne you have?
Clerk: Yes.
Hot Girl: You don’t have Brut?
Clerk: No.
Me: She should temper her expectations going forward.
"Hey Guy! I'm in a short film called Lost Treasure of the Valley that's playing tonight at the Grindhouse Film Festival at Grand Rapids Comic Con at 9pm, the Studio City Film Festival this Sunday Nov. 10th in a shorts block at 5:30pm. For tickets go to !"
I only have a few bucket list items so far and honestly they’re pretty doable
1) throw out a pitch at (ANY)
@MLB
game
2) stand in the
@OceanSprayInc
cranberry bog
3) pet an alpaca
4) meet
@LoriBethDenberg
5) run a marathon