Kۗۗۗۗۗۗۗۗۗۗ 🍇
@Kuriiiia
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If you ran into a wall with a boner you would break your nose
@Kenneth03Mw
@yvng_jooh
@_flowstryy
@1MASHMARTIN
@Acoco_ke
@_sharlyyyy
@Bandit__2
@btw_its_fidel
@Brian_kibra1
@iamfrankoh
@itsjimke
@dadjokesKE
Miss kenya 🇰🇪 😂
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Hating on bananas should be irigo
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Nikiwa form 2 kuna boyz alifunganisha kamba zangu za kiatu nikiwa nimedozz, saa ya lunch time kufika nikatoa sahani mbio ati nakimbia kabla line ya githeri ijae watu. Nikaanguka vibaya, huyo boyz akaanza kucheka. Nikasimama na hasira nikamnyonga hadi aka faint...alafu niaka......
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Back then nilikua nadate dem flani bombe, her dad was rich asf. So one day the girl was home alone akanicall akanishow nikam tuchill kwa pool yao. Mi nikapanda uber mbio nikafika kwao. Swimo tuliingia tukiwa ndethe, tukachill kwa one of the corners, akaniambia anadai rainbow kiss
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Mum : Unajua baba franko ule ako na probox.
Me : Zii
Mum : Unamjua !!!....baba franko mwenye ako na probox.
Me: ???
Mum : Ule aukua na probox !!!....baba franko. Mpelekee hizi vitu.
Me: .....
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I had to zoom 🥲
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Ukiwa na sura mbaya na mko road trip, kila mtu atakuchocha venye wewe ni cameraman mkali.
Happens to me all the time.
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Jana nlikua dark web nikaona mahali msee anauza PayPal account iko na 900 dollars for 10dollars.
Hapa unaeza risk hiyo 10 ukule 890.
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The Blacklist had an episode where an assassin disposed of the bodies using chemicals. I just wanna know if it was fake or real ?
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Done
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Leo nlikua nimevisit aunty yangu, nikaskia kukojoa. Choo ilikua safi na sikua nataka kuspray kila mahali, so nikachukua mtungi ya 10litres nikaanza kukojoa hapo. Kabla hata nimalize nikambao, mjulus ikakwama 😭. Ikabidi nichukue simu niangalie pic ya tweep flani anaitwa Veebaby.
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Bwana ya Akothee akikula kiatu, alafu aone si Akothee.
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Kuna mamorio hungoja mtu aende cyber aeke movie alafu wanakuja kukuomba, I hate that shit man
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Back then nikiwa highschool, nlikua naenda hizi group za telegram za madem nudes zao zimeleakiwa, nachukua hizo pic's wakiwa ndethe na wakiwa na nguo. Nacreate account kwa dating site. Wanaume walikua wanadm na 90% walikua wanadai nudes. So mi nawashow wanitumie 500 nipate nguvu
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I asked one of my gay friends, 'why are you gay',he said, "The government pays me to be gay, approximately $160 a week. the pay goes up with age to roughly a $500 a week when you turn 26.
This is because 26 is the age when most people lol for long term relationships...
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Mbona huezi endea sai ? waru doing ?
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Pia mimi one day girls will make a crowd just to watch me eat. 😩
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I remember when my friend came out as gay and told me “but don’t worry you’re not my type”, I felt weirdly hurt. I was like, kwani nakaa aje.
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Umepewa 10 million sai, lakini:
• Kuna snail inakukimbiza for the rest of your life na ikikuguza unakufa.
• Hio snail haifai kuuliwa.
• Inajua kwenye uko at all times.
• Kazi yake ni kukutafuta.
Utachukua hio pesa ?
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Tangu 2015 niko na followers 170 😭. Mnifollow aki. Nita follow back 💯
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Hao wanajaribu so hard kufit it kwa football twitter lakini hata kizungu hawajui.
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Nlikua nimeshtuka itakuja positive. Alafu nikakumbuka mimi si dem.
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Avoid ladies who are older than you, they got no respect for you.
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The realest niggas in the world are the ones who post a tweet get 1 like and never delete their tweet.
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Done 🙂
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Jana jioni nilipanda foward nikitoka tao nikakaa kwa dirisha kiti ya nyuma, nikamake sure nimeifunga alafu nikalogin twitter kiasi, kukakua na jam gari ikasimama hapo kwa brigde ya muthurua. Nikiwa nacheka cheka hapo nikaona kimkono kimechukua simu yangu fwaa ikaenda hivyo......
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Neighbour yangu ni Single mom, na kila sato akienda kufua nguo auvaa shati ya white bila bra na kakinyasa kafupi, alafu akifua anajimwagilia maji kila mahali. Naona nikama ananipea hint, huyu akinipea aki ya nani nampea ball.
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What is the best response to "I Love you" from someone you have no feelings for?
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Nimeona boyz flani alitumia dvck enlargement pills, badala ya mjulus ikue kubwa balls zikakua kubwa ufala, zinakaa ball ya basketball.
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Done.
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By age 25, you should have one failed relationship that almost broke you.
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Watu wanafaa waeke their age kwa bio
unapata msee unabishana na yeye ako old enough kukuachia laana jameni.
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Pewa
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If you cook that I will Sueh you.
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people who don’t do drugs how do yall deal with ur stress
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Kuna dem mkonda alikua amepost pic yake huku, rib zinaonekana kama zile ngombe za Turkana 😭, nani ako na hiyo pic.
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Having no friends is better than having friends who don't appreciate you.
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Ugly niggas tuko under 25 lakini sura ni ya msee anapush 60
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Nlikua natembea alafu out of nowhere ngombe ziko na pembe kubwa zikatokea mbele yangu, karibu nifaint 😭😭
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Wamama wa area yetu wamekua wakituma their highschool daughters kwa boyz (over 18) wenye wako na dooh. Dem akishaingizwa kwa keja mama yake anakuja, anatishia kupeleka kijana kwa polisi, inabidi kijana atoboke. Uzuri mimi hawanikujiangi.
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Done
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Hivi ama
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Unaeza dhani watu wanavuta sigara wamemake it in life kumbe wanafegit
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Some ugly chick saying hi to me idk wtf is wrong with her
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Imagine kujiambia hautadinyana na dem yako hadi muoane, alafu hiyo siku ikifika unapata ako na mjulus kubwa kukuliko.
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Acha nikusaidie 😂
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Kuitwa gay is actually a compliment, ukiangalia design gay people hufanya mambo yao
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Eti waKenya wanunua kitambulisho elfu mbili, poleni jameni.
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I drew my favorite rapper Kendrick Lamar, I hope he likes it.🥹
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Nani anataka tukue tunaombea account zetu pamoja, by next year tukue 10k followers 😭 anyone.
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Kuishi solo ni raha, natembea nikiwa uchi. I love this feeling.
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Life is like a long queue, pale mwisho we're being served death
People are added to the line everyday, and some leave the line everyday
The problem is that you don't know what position you are in the queue
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